Overheard at the Paizo office

[captain yesterday]

All of my most important phone calls are handled on the toilet.

It's like there's a secret sensor I trip so everyone knows to call me then, it's quite annoying.

[Sara Marie]

Katina: LET IT BE KNOWN: I heard Diego chuckle at that pun

[Steve Geddes]

Sara Marie wrote:

Katina: LET IT BE KNOWN: I heard Diego chuckle at that pun

It’s happening Diego. It was only a matter of time...

[Mark Moreland]

Steve Geddes wrote:

Sara Marie wrote:

Katina: LET IT BE KNOWN: I heard Diego chuckle at that pun

It’s happening Diego. It was only a matter of time...

one of us

one of us

one of us

[Readerbreeder]

Mark Moreland wrote:

Steve Geddes wrote:

Sara Marie wrote:

Katina: LET IT BE KNOWN: I heard Diego chuckle at that pun

It’s happening Diego. It was only a matter of time...

one of us

one of us

one of us

Nooooo! Fight it, Diego! Don't let them take you!

[Katina Davis]

Robot Chris: now to shed this cocoon sham of web product management and to arise as the clickbait writing butterfly I am inside

[Rysky]

Katina Davis wrote:

Robot Chris: now to shed this cocoon sham of web product management and to arise as the clickbait writing butterfly I am inside

... yay?

[Cosmo's Slightly More Evil Twin]

Rysky wrote:

Katina Davis wrote:

Robot Chris: now to shed this cocoon sham of web product management and to arise as the clickbait writing butterfly I am inside

... yay?

You'll never believe her best clickbait title! Click here to see!

[Readerbreeder]

Cosmo's Slightly More Evil Twin wrote:

Rysky wrote:

Katina Davis wrote:

Robot Chris: now to shed this cocoon sham of web product management and to arise as the clickbait writing butterfly I am inside

... yay?

You'll never believe her best clickbait title! Click here to see!

Would that not then be your clickbait, CSMET?

[Cosmo's Slightly More Evil Twin]

Readerbreeder wrote:

Cosmo's Slightly More Evil Twin wrote:

Rysky wrote:

Katina Davis wrote:

Robot Chris: now to shed this cocoon sham of web product management and to arise as the clickbait writing butterfly I am inside

... yay?

You'll never believe her best clickbait title! Click here to see!

Would that not then be your clickbait, CSMET?

TOP TEN WAYS I STOLE ROBOT'S BIT! YOU WON'T BELIEVE NUMBER FIVE!

[Woran]

I like how Cosmo's slightly more evil twin is in the dark archives.

[The Sideromancer]

There's only so many places to find a place designed to contain immensely powerful magic these days.

[Sara Marie]

Katina: hey now, that’s getting close to pun territory, Diego

Diego: It's not a pun.

Katina: preeeeeeeetty close

Diego: It's a play on words

Katina: that’s what puns are

[General Silliness]

Diego: If only I had married everyone I hate...

Katina: if wishes were horses…?

Diego: We'd all be eating steak

Sam: This conversation requires a lot of context to make any sense.

[Sara Marie]

CS Department: [conversation about adorable sweaters for hot water bottles]

Katina: what they really need is a water bottle cover that looks like a tauntaun

Katina: though those are only… LUKE WARM

[Vidmaster7]

Katina is my new favorite person.

[Rysky]

Annnnnnnd I'm ded.

[Katina Davis]

Sam: Based on the pictures on their website, they exclusively help children ride dolphins.

[Sara Marie]

Diego: I am confident I could overpower a potato

[Hypnotato]

Your confidence may be misplaced.

All power to the Potato.

[Dire Iowan Potato]

{attempts Intimidate check vs Diego (1d20 - 4 ⇒ (18) - 4 = 14) vs DC 17 = FAILURE}

{flees, stage left (even)}

[Diego Valdez]

Having spent so much time in retail I have a pretty respectable sense motive versus intimidate and bluff.

[Steve Geddes]

Diego Valdez wrote:

Having spent so much time in retail I have a pretty respectable sense motive versus intimidate and bluff.

From what I've seen, you have pretty respectable stats across the board.

[ulgulanoth]

Diego does not min-max, Diego is an well rounded character

[Luis Loza]

Magical sparkle knife murder power!

[Virginia J.]

Virginia: It's like an oompa loompa got hit in the face with a frying pan.

Katina: Oompa, Loompa, doompity *THWACK*

[Hmm]

^ This is why I love Katina.

Hmm

[Haladir]

Virginia J. wrote:

Virginia: It's like an oompa loompa got hit in the face with a frying pan.

Katina: Oompa, Loompa, doompity *THWACK*

...and now I've explained to my coworkers why I just blew coffee out of my nose.

[John Napier 698]

Haladir wrote:

Virginia J. wrote:

Virginia: It's like an oompa loompa got hit in the face with a frying pan.

Katina: Oompa, Loompa, doompity *THWACK*

...and now I've explained to my coworkers why I just blew coffee out of my nose.

Better coffee than soda. That stuff really burns.

[Psiphyre]

John Napier 698 wrote:

Haladir wrote:

Virginia J. wrote:

Virginia: It's like an oompa loompa got hit in the face with a frying pan.

Katina: Oompa, Loompa, doompity *THWACK*

...and now I've explained to my coworkers why I just blew coffee out of my nose.

Better coffee than soda. That stuff really burns.

Eh... I dunno.

HOT coffee seems to burn just fine...

--C.

;p

[John Napier 698]

I did a "Nasal Spray" using soda many years ago. The acid from the carbonation irritated my nose for several hours.

[Hmm]

Sara Marie wrote:

Katina: LET IT BE KNOWN: I heard Diego chuckle at that pun

Speaking of Diego's pun aversion, I wrote a Song for New Years in which I named a number of Paizo Employees. I thought I'd point it out in case you guys missed it.

Hmm

[Cosmo]

Rei: Wait, how can i become a doctor in parasol dueling?

Katina: You have to go to medical parasol dueling school for like 8 years.

[Cosmo]

Chris 2: I have so many questions... 1) How do you kill a bear? 2) How do you prep a bear for cooking? 3) Why are you resorting to eating bears? 4) Do they come with honey?

Chris 1: Answer to first 3: Bare hands

Last Q: obvs

[Sara Marie]

Chris C: im gonna go buy kiwis tonight just so I can eat the skins in front of CS tomorrow

[NobodysHome]

Sara Marie wrote:

Chris C: im gonna go buy kiwis tonight just so I can eat the skins in front of CS tomorrow

That is scary only because Impus Major (my son) eats kiwis whole (skin and all) and it SO grosses out his friend that he will get up and walk away rather than watch Impus Major eat them.

[Readerbreeder]

Sara Marie wrote:

Chris C: im gonna go buy kiwis tonight just so I can eat the skins in front of CS tomorrow

Sara Marie, please tell me that Chris was talking about kiwi fruit and not the bird or (gulp) New Zealanders? 'Cause the last two sound more like something Cosmo would come up with...

[Un-Bear-able Puns]

Cosmo wrote:

Chris 2: I have so many questions... 1) How do you kill a bear? 2) How do you prep a bear for cooking? 3) Why are you resorting to eating bears? 4) Do they come with honey?

Chris 1: Answer to first 3: Bare hands

Last Q: obvs

This line of thinking is way too grizzly for me.

[Sara Marie]

Definitely the fruit. And a box of them showed up in our kitchen yesterday morning!

[Katina Davis]

Sara Marie: oooooh i like floating meat orb

[Sara Marie]

Sam: And thank you for caring about my ooze.

[Readerbreeder]

Katina Davis wrote:

Sara Marie: oooooh i like floating meat orb

Boy, overpowered characters never give those beholders any respect, do they?

[Luis Loza]

"My lack of object permanence convinces me he's dead. Can we remodel the office's exterior to look like him so that we never forget?"

[General Silliness]

Katina: omg when Beyonce dies we can bring her back with a Seyonce?

[Monty Python Colonel]

General Silliness wrote:

Katina: omg when Beyonce dies we can bring her back with a Seyonce?

Stop that! This has become far too silly!

[Sara Marie]

Jason B.... I'm going to whittle a small Viking ship in the office.

[ulgulanoth]

Jason's Viking armada then started raiding the offices of Paizo, so much coffee was pillaged

[Feros]

I wonder if the rest of the office staff would organize some form of danegeld to keep Jason and his raiders at bay.

[John Napier 698]

Or a bunch of fire-throwing catapults made from Popsicle sticks. :D