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robot chris: everyone that got that pretend I used the words I meant to
christopher: Did you accidentally the email?
robot chris: a bit
robot chris: but it's internal, so I guess that's less bad?
christopher: Unless the editors got it. Fortunately, I think we're low on torch and pitchfork supplies right now.
jessica: Editors don't judge unless they're actually editing
jessica: well
jessica: we judge
jessica: but we do so in secret
jessica: so you need never know :-)
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robot chris: I think the keyboard sometimes taps into the brain and makes it leak
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Ignore that little man with the hammer. He's just there to relieve the pressure on your brain. Really.
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SnowJade wrote: Ignore that little man with the hammer. He's just there to relieve the pressure on your brain. Really. "I can fix it!"
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Robot Chris: untrue, Christopher!
Robot Chris: it is possible
Robot Chris: lure them with pies!
Ashley: don't make promises of pie you can't keep robot
cs erik: just a heads up in case my mouth explodes or something
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Lissa You know it looks easy until you have to hook the eggs into the internet.
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Chris Lambertz wrote: Lissa You know it looks easy until you have to hook the eggs into the internet. That sounds absolutely slaadful.
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digital egging?!?!?! BRILLIANT!!!!! You are now on Slaadi Claws' nice list ... you really don't want to be on the naughty list...
Quote: 21:10:04 * Daigle likes to taste his toxins.
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Slaadi Claws wrote: digital egging?!?!?! BRILLIANT!!!!! You are now on Slaadi Claws' nice list ... you really don't want to be on the naughty list... Hmmm, you look familiar somehow... nope, I got nothing.
SlaadiClaws wrote: Slaadi Claws wrote: digital egging?!?!?! BRILLIANT!!!!! You are now on Slaadi Claws' nice list ... you really don't want to be on the naughty list... Hmmm, you look familiar somehow... nope, I got nothing. A Slaad by any other name is just another egging opportunity.
MMmmm... Egg Slaadi... One of my favorite sandwiches.
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Robot Chris festive cosmo is a thing to behold
Christopher I can only imagine.
Cosmo You can only nightmare
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cs erik: pretty clear whos been naughty and whos been nice
gary: is it santa
gary: i bet it's santa
gary: he's naughty and nice
robot chris: I think Santa is Chaotic Neutral
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Ashley i don't think squid ink is traditionally used in a turkey brine
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RobotChris: because I have a problem
RobotChris: maybe? I don't know
Christopher: That would explain the frequent walking into walls.
RobotChris: nope, I bump into things of my own accord
Cosmo wrote: RobotChris: because I have a problem
RobotChris: maybe? I don't know
Christopher: That would explain the frequent walking into walls.
RobotChris: nope, I bump into things of my own accord
{opens RobotChris' BALDUR.INI file, updates Path Search Nodes from 4000 to 32000}
Ambrosia Slaad wrote: {opens RobotChris' BALDUR.INI file, updates Path Search Nodes from 4000 to 32000}
Please don't do that. Secretly lowering it on him was the only way they could fix the last server slowdown. Not to mention many of them considered the increase in office hilarity that ensued killing two birds with one stone.
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cs erik: Squeely Nord for iconic golem.
sara marie: squeely nord is a golem???
crystal: Pork Golem?
christopher: Savory Golem
sara marie: meat golem
sara marie: is that sucha thing?
christopher: Well, there's the Flesh Golem...
christopher: That's made of meat.
christopher: Magical meat.
justin: there's also a blood golem... cause that's a thing
sara marie: nope this is a meat golem
sara marie: ground beef, porkchops, chicken feet, tripe
crystal: Feast Golem, maybe? It's head could be a pig with an apple in its mouth
ashley: feast golem punishes you for your holiday overindulgence
justin: why did we not have this for thanksgiving?
ashley: because turkeys are too dumb to be golems
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liz: Pork golems?
liz: Yes.
liz: Rolled in butter and herbs.
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sara marie: i want that so bad i can taste it
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liz: Pork golems would have a bonus to their CMD against grapple checks.
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Liz: I know that's my response when my belly is rubbed.
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liz: Hrm. I wonder if pork golems would deal fire damage to those grappling or damaging them in melee...because their crispy fatty flesh bursts and splatters hot fat on them.
cosmo: I dunno... but I would expect them to grant any opponent with a mouth a bite attack.
cosmo: because PORK IS DELICIOUS
liz: Compelling Aura (Su): The pork golem drives creatures to distraction with its luscious, dripping, fatty flesh, crisped to a perfect golden brown. Creatures within 30 feet must make a DC 25 Will save—failure indicates that the creature must make a bite attack (even if they normally do not have this attack) against the pork golem.
cosmo: Successful attacks deal 1d4 damage to the biter from the hot, fatty juices.
cosmo: Successful attacks leave the attackers staggered for 1 round as they slowly chew and savor the delicious, delicious pork...
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Noooo, it's a treyf golem!
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ashley: they're cats with wings
crystal: but the lemurs... oh god, the lemurs..
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christopher: I have to think that "a s*&%-ton of monkeys" is horrifyingly accurate.
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crystal: I haven't told you about the lemur gangs?
crystal: They like to steal things
crystal: And they know they out-weigh you when there's fifteen of them
crystal: No bars. Just a need for your keys. And hair.
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Lissa: Are you sure they didn't want to thelma and louise it off a cliff. If disney has taught me anything, it's that lemurs jump off clifs.
Christopher: That's lemmings
Crystal: Yeah, we didn't have any lemmings. When the cops come for them, they fight to the death
RobotChris: pesky lemurs, walking the streets, leering at passers by
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Crystal: Stop stuffing random things in yourself.
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*goes for the brain bleach*
steelwool q-tips needed, all crazy lena dunham style
omg spoilers
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Sara Marie wrote:
crystal: No bars. Just a need for your keys. And hair.
I need an expert opinion (as I am waaaay out of practice) ... Doodlebug Anklebiter, is the lemur on the far left a little [bubble-bubble-bubble]?
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Wes: Not freezing trumps style.
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Sara Marie wrote: liz: Hrm. I wonder if pork golems would deal fire damage to those grappling or damaging them in melee...because their crispy fatty flesh bursts and splatters hot fat on them.
cosmo: I dunno... but I would expect them to grant any opponent with a mouth a bite attack.
cosmo: because PORK IS DELICIOUS
liz: Compelling Aura (Su): The pork golem drives creatures to distraction with its luscious, dripping, fatty flesh, crisped to a perfect golden brown. Creatures within 30 feet must make a DC 25 Will save—failure indicates that the creature must make a bite attack (even if they normally do not have this attack) against the pork golem.
cosmo: Successful attacks deal 1d4 damage to the biter from the hot, fatty juices.
cosmo: Successful attacks leave the attackers staggered for 1 round as they slowly chew and savor the delicious, delicious pork...
Cerilian Dwarves should get at least additional +4 morale bonus to saving throw against this aura because of their taboo against pork, if not outright immunity.
Robot Chris: this ipod is glowing of its own accord
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Judy Bauer wrote: Noooo, it's a treyf golem! Fear not, fair lady! *Runs offstage. Various odd noises and a few mutters ensue.* creak, creeeeaaakkk, creakk, ruummble, rummmble, CREEAAAKK. *SnowJade appears, tail first, towing a wheeled platform with a....thing....on it.* Here you are! An actual Paizonian gefiltefish golem, just for you! *Headbonk* Enjoy!
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Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Lost Omens Subscriber
Liz Courts wrote: Wes: Not freezing trumps style. Yes.
Yes, it does.
thunderspirit wrote: Liz Courts wrote: Wes: Not freezing trumps style. Yes.
Yes, it does. *Complacently licking a paw* But of course, you can have both.
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SnowJade wrote: Judy Bauer wrote: Noooo, it's a treyf golem! Fear not, fair lady! *Runs offstage. Various odd noises and a few mutters ensue.* creak, creeeeaaakkk, creakk, ruummble, rummmble, CREEAAAKK. *SnowJade appears, tail first, towing a wheeled platform with a....thing....on it.* Here you are! An actual Paizonian gefiltefish golem, just for you! *Headbonk* Enjoy! I'll take your gefilte fish golem and raise you a certified kosher pork flavoured goose golem. What a wonderful world we live in.
LET THE GOLEM WARS COMMENCE!
Limeylongears wrote: certified kosher pork flavoured goose golem I'd fix that link for you, but you didn't even include the website, let alone the http:// that you need to direct it off paizo's site...
uhhhh... everyone missed the fact that it's a BACON golem?
I fixed Limeylongears' link
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liz: Dire consequences are spiky and covered in bone armor.
liz: Natural armor spikes.
Sara Marie wrote: liz: Dire consequences are spiky and covered in bone armor.
liz: Natural armor spikes.
And thus the question that resulted in a pun tax, a pun thread and being hit with a d20 of bludgeoning at least twice was answered!
Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Lost Omens Subscriber
zylphryx wrote: Sara Marie wrote: liz: Dire consequences are spiky and covered in bone armor.
liz: Natural armor spikes. And thus the question that resulted in a pun tax, a pun thread and being hit with a d20 of bludgeoning at least twice was answered! Speaking of which...
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