Overheard at the Paizo office


Off-Topic Discussions

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Silver Crusade

Pathfinder Companion, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber
thunderspirit wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
liz: I ARE NINJA. I IS NINJA'ING.

So basically:

DELETE
DELETE
DELETE
DELETE
DELETE
DELETE
DELETE
DELETE

Well, that all depends on the thread...

Actually, no.
No, it doesn't.

Notice I didn't specify what she's deleting.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

4 people marked this as a favorite.

She was not deleting anything. This time.

Webstore Gninja Minion

5 people marked this as a favorite.
Sara Marie wrote:
She was not deleting anything. This time.

*quietly sharpens blade*


Was she making cookies for my bot?


Sara Marie wrote:

gary: fresh jet black coffee in tech team

gary: guaranteed blacker than your soul

That's easy, Cosmo isn't on tech team anyway... Is he?

Technological Overlord

7 people marked this as a favorite.
Drejk wrote:
That's easy, Cosmo isn't on tech team anyway... Is he?

NO.

Project Manager

8 people marked this as a favorite.

Will: Any my heart grew three sizes today.

Mika: No it didn't.

Will: No, it didn't, but it's a good story.

Contributor

3 people marked this as a favorite.
Jessica Price wrote:
Justin: so what I'm hearing is we need to have a fan contest for creating the drinks "Cayden's Displeasure" and "Cayden's Bliss"

When I turned 21, my parents bought about a dozen different kinds of hard liquor for the occasion. Everything from coconut rum to tequila to grape schnops to Jameson whiskey.

One of my friends walked in, completely sober, and said, "Hey, I don't feel like going back and forth to get my drink. Let's see what happens when I mix ALL OF THESE TOGETHER."

Imagine mixing people of every possible culture and nationality together and stuffing them all into one skinny man's stomach. They're not going to be happy, and neither was my friend after drinking that tantalizing purple concoction. Two hours later and he was vomiting uncontrollably. He passed out and crashed at my house for nearly ten hours, his face transfixed with a drunken blush that persisted for two days, mocking his insolence long after he had sobered up.

This, my friends, is Cayden's Displeasure.

Spoiler:

Some people call it "severe alcohol poisoning," however.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

robot chris: I declare it officially dub

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

1 person marked this as a favorite.

cs erik: Imagine a Baneling, but filled with glitter instead of caustic acid!

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

4 people marked this as a favorite.

gary: i have decided that i am doctor octopus

gary: my minions are my robotic arms

robot chris: robotic arm robot?

robot chris: Robot Chris feels meta


4 people marked this as a favorite.
Sara Marie wrote:

gary: i have decided that i am doctor octopus

gary: my minions are my robotic arms

robot chris: robotic arm robot?

robot chris: Robot Chris feels meta

For those about to Ock, we salute you!

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 32

3 people marked this as a favorite.
Alexander Augunas wrote:
Jessica Price wrote:
Justin: so what I'm hearing is we need to have a fan contest for creating the drinks "Cayden's Displeasure" and "Cayden's Bliss"

When I turned 21, my parents bought about a dozen different kinds of hard liquor for the occasion. Everything from coconut rum to tequila to grape schnops to Jameson whiskey.

One of my friends walked in, completely sober, and said, "Hey, I don't feel like going back and forth to get my drink. Let's see what happens when I mix ALL OF THESE TOGETHER."

Imagine mixing people of every possible culture and nationality together and stuffing them all into one skinny man's stomach. They're not going to be happy, and neither was my friend after drinking that tantalizing purple concoction. Two hours later and he was vomiting uncontrollably. He passed out and crashed at my house for nearly ten hours, his face transfixed with a drunken blush that persisted for two days, mocking his insolence long after he had sobered up.

This, my friends, is Cayden's Displeasure.

** spoiler omitted **

If you add some cough syrup and set it aflame, that's a flaming homer.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

christopher: I also like that [redacted] only seems to order during the worst possible weather.

christopher: If the world was ending and blood raining from the sky, I would expect [redacted] to be on the phone placing a sandwich order.

[redacted]: if its not nice enough out to go walk to lunch, and I don't have food in my drawer... I'll be ordering delivery

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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robot chris: ...coffee golem...


Cayden gets a spell that lets his priests turn water into booze, is there a spell like that for Coffee?


2 people marked this as a favorite.

Tiny Coffee Golem?!

TCG! Chris needs you!


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Cheapy wrote:
Cayden gets a spell that lets his priests turn water into booze, is there a spell like that for Coffee?

I think that priest of Cayden get that spell in the morning. Or more likely sometime around the noon after important holidays.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Robot was in need of at least large (possibly huge or maybe even gargantuan) coffee golem.


I have a great hope in TCG's ability to provide enough coffee... Even if he will have to run quickly there and back again multiple times.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

8 people marked this as a favorite.

christopher: Sometimes, I get so involved in the mechanics of the website that I forget it actually has content. Feels like one of the guys working on the pyramids suddenly looking up and realizing he's hundreds of feet in the air.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

5 people marked this as a favorite.

sara marie: "Liz is preparing to use her Stick of Product Poking™ on it."

liz: ...How about [redacted].
liz: That's more appropriate.

sara marie: or Flail of Product Whacking™

liz: Flails work
liz: Ooh, mace.
liz: because some things need to be smashed

sara marie: Mace of Product Bashing™

liz: Heavy Mace.

...

sara marie: Stick of Product Poking™
sara marie: I wonder what said stick looks like

liz: Knobbly
liz: Maybe with a few thorns.


Will this stick be for sale? Because if so, shut up and take my money!

Webstore Gninja Minion

4 people marked this as a favorite.
Mythic JMD031 wrote:
Will this stick be for sale? Because if so, shut up and take my money!

Nuuuu. My stick. >.>


But...I has monies.

Dark Archive Software Developer

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Mythic JMD031 wrote:
But...I has monies.

How much money? >.>


2 people marked this as a favorite.

Do not try to pawn off Happy Fun Gninja's Stick of Product Poking, for she is your supplier of cookies, and happy fun products.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Sara Marie wrote:
christopher: Sometimes, I get so involved in the mechanics of the website that I forget it actually has content. Feels like one of the guys working on the pyramids suddenly looking up and realizing he's hundreds of feet in the air.

*Raises hand*

*Cough*

Um...I hate to point it out...but...

Shouldn't that be "Looks down and realizing he's hundreds of feet in the air." ?

(¬_¬)

(⌐_⌐)

*Runs away...*

Shadow Lodge

7 people marked this as a favorite.

Do not taunt Happy Fun Gninja.


Give 'im th' stick
DONNNNNNNN'T GIVE 'IM TH' STICK


Orthos wrote:
Do not taunt Happy Fun Gninja.

Awesome! :)

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

10 people marked this as a favorite.

crystal: Liz's pancakes are like the pancakes god would make

christopher: Liz's special ingredient is 2 Tbsp of pure sin.

liz: ...This is often the case, yes.


6 people marked this as a favorite.

that sounds like the plot to Arsenic & Old Lace

Shadow Lodge

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Does Paizo have a basement? (I presume the raptor warehouses are elsewhere...)


Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Maps, Pathfinder Accessories, Pawns, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

Naw, any bodies that accrue are just fed to the raptors. Leaving no trace at all...


Orthos wrote:
Does Paizo have a basement? (I presume the raptor warehouses are elsewhere...)

Yes, they do. They keep the devs there. Presumably for slave labor. Or maybe Cosmo needs their souls for some reason.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Sara Marie wrote:

sara marie: "Liz is preparing to use her Stick of Product Poking™ on it."

liz: ...How about [redacted].
liz: That's more appropriate.

sara marie: or Flail of Product Whacking™

liz: Flails work
liz: Ooh, mace.
liz: because some things need to be smashed

sara marie: Mace of Product Bashing™

liz: Heavy Mace.

...

sara marie: Stick of Product Poking™
sara marie: I wonder what said stick looks like

liz: Knobbly
liz: Maybe with a few thorns.

I would have suggested a large mallet, but I'm too scarred that Liz would become Paizo's version of Gallagher and even more scarred of what she would start smashing in place of the watermelons.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

6 people marked this as a favorite.

gary: oh man i love having evil ideas

...

gary: what do you call something that summons a wizard?

Webstore Gninja Minion

Drock11 wrote:
I would have suggested a large mallet, but I'm too scarred that Liz would become Paizo's version of Gallagher and even more scarred of what she would start smashing in place of the watermelons.

>:-D


Feros wrote:
Naw, any bodies that accrue are just fed to the raptors. Leaving no trace at all...

"Never trust a man with a pig farm."

Dark Archive Software Developer

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Robot Chris: no body parts on any buttons, plz.


2 people marked this as a favorite.
Liz Courts wrote:
Drock11 wrote:
I would have suggested a large mallet, but I'm too scarred that Liz would become Paizo's version of Gallagher and even more scarred of what she would start smashing in place of the watermelons.
>:-D

Smashy Mallet + Stick of Product Poking™ = double weapon?

Paizo Employee Paizo Customer Service Algorithm

Gary: Don't inhale the confetti.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

9 people marked this as a favorite.

robot chris: The wild digital products assistant lurks around tech team island, quietly, like a roomba armed with windex.

sara marie: and a bag of glitter


4 people marked this as a favorite.
Sara Marie wrote:

robot chris: The wild digital products assistant lurks around tech team island, quietly, like a roomba armed with windex.

sara marie: and a bag of glitter

I've been binging on Parks and Recreation lately and this made me think of DJ Roomba.

Digital Products Assistant

Tirisfal wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:

robot chris: The wild digital products assistant lurks around tech team island, quietly, like a roomba armed with windex.

sara marie: and a bag of glitter

I've been binging on Parks and Recreation lately and this made me think of DJ Roomba.

<3

Digital Products Assistant

10 people marked this as a favorite.

Going to save everyone some time and quote myself for the rest of the day in one post:

Robot Chris SNOOWWww ommgggdshgbhj snoowow aahhhhh AHHHH snoowwwwwww O___O AAHHHH SNOW YYAAAAY*

*Edited for clarification

Shadow Lodge

So is this a "yay snow" rambling or an "ohgodno snow" rambling


srsly you guys keep mentioning this snow thing what the hell is it?


Lamontius wrote:
srsly you guys keep mentioning this snow thing what the hell is it?

I believe it's some strange disturbance in the force. I've only heard rumors of it but I seriously have my doubts on its factuality.

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