Overheard at the Paizo office


Off-Topic Discussions

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Sovereign Court Organized Play Coordinator

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LZP Am I catering to your delusions?

Dark Archive Software Developer

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Sara Marie: oooooh why on earth would you feel guilty about that?

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

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katina: I think looking back on my interview, I remember being asked if I had experience dealing with “complex software that is constantly changing”
katina: and I was like “psh, that’s probably an exaggeration”
katina: Spoiler alert: it was not.

Community Manager

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Ashley: THERE'S ALWAYS ROOM FOR BREAKFAST BURRITOS

Silver Crusade

Liz Courts wrote:
Ashley: THERE'S ALWAYS ROOM FOR BREAKFAST BURRITOS

Because they never stay long.

Accountant

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Rysky wrote:
Liz Courts wrote:
Ashley: THERE'S ALWAYS ROOM FOR BREAKFAST BURRITOS
Because they never stay long.

Oh ye of little intestinal fortitude.

Community Manager

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Robot: basically she is adorable
and that is the moral of the story


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Liz Courts wrote:

Robot: basically she is adorable

and that is the moral of the story

Speaking of adorable, we need a Cake/Cookies/Dessert/Sweets Golem.

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

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sara marie: when two feast golems love each other very much

katina: They put literal buns in the oven

Silver Crusade

Ashley Kaprielian wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Liz Courts wrote:
Ashley: THERE'S ALWAYS ROOM FOR BREAKFAST BURRITOS
Because they never stay long.
Oh ye of little intestinal fortitude.

:(

My tummy doesn't like me.


Sara Marie wrote:

sara marie: when two feast golems love each other very much

katina: They put literal buns in the oven

They don't make Buffet Golems? Or fuse into the Banquet Golem? :(

- - - - - - -

Feast Colossus.


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Nutcase Entertainment wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:

sara marie: when two feast golems love each other very much

katina: They put literal buns in the oven

They don't make Buffet Golems? Or fuse into the Banquet Golem? :(

- - - - - - -

Feast Colossus.

So, Buffet Golems fuse to make Banquet Golems, which can combine to form a Feast Colossus? Sounds like the most delicious Voltron ever.


Schmorgan Heckengaard wrote:
Nutcase Entertainment wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:

sara marie: when two feast golems love each other very much

katina: They put literal buns in the oven

They don't make Buffet Golems? Or fuse into the Banquet Golem? :(

- - - - - - -

Feast Colossus.

So, Buffet Golems fuse to make Banquet Golems, which can combine to form a Feast Colossus? Sounds like the most delicious Voltron ever.

More like the Buffet Golems are the 'baby' Feast Golems.

So, Buffet Golems ---> Feast Golems ---> Banquet Golems ---> Feast Colossus.


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Sara Marie wrote:

sara marie: when two feast golems love each other very much

katina: They put literal buns in the oven

I need to see if my friend will let me share the stats she made for a biscut dragon familiar...

Community & Digital Content Director

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redacted and I feel like I shouldn't google it at work

redacted BUT

Community Manager

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Robot Chris: A Katina is never late, she quotes and puns when she means to


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Extrapolating that Katina thus is a wizard, rides a white horse, and was barely involved in the dragon incident.

Silver Crusade

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Chris Lambertz wrote:

redacted and I feel like I shouldn't google it at work

redacted BUT

>.>

<.<

Was it something I mentioned?

Paizo Employee Sales Associate

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Ashley: I think I intimidated Will with how on fleek my sanrio swagger is today.

Community & Digital Content Director

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redacted i'm gonna shotgun a pizza


As a lifelong NY'er, NO! There are only two acceptable ways to eat pizza.
- 1 Slice, (Note: If it isn't sold by the slice, it's not good pizza!) eaten with no utensils from the tip to the crust. You may fold the pizza along the point-crust axis if you wish.
- 2 Slices, one stacked on top of the other. This is a very advanced technique, and is best left to professionals! Background music is MANDATORY!

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

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katina: When I had braces, I couldn’t bite apples or caramel, let alone neck flesh.

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

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diego: [redacted for your mental safety]

robot chris: D: D: D: D: D:

katina: welp, i’m upset for the rest of my life now

diego: Sorry, for some reason vampires drinking blood through a straw reminded me of that

Silver Crusade

Sara Marie wrote:
katina: When I had braces, I couldn’t bite apples or caramel, let alone neck flesh.

Pft, bunch of wimps scared of hickies going through their DR.


Rysky wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
katina: When I had braces, I couldn’t bite apples or caramel, let alone neck flesh.
Pft, bunch of wimps scared of hickies going through their DR.

I'm guessing you never had braces.

There are certain things that biting with braces HURTS LIKE @(!#&%@*&#%@*& HELL. Hurts the BITER, not the BITEE.

Silver Crusade

Orthos wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
katina: When I had braces, I couldn’t bite apples or caramel, let alone neck flesh.
Pft, bunch of wimps scared of hickies going through their DR.

I'm guessing you never had braces.

There are certain things that biting with braces HURTS LIKE @(!#&%@*&#%@*& HELL. Hurts the BITER, not the BITEE.

Oh! I did but aside from a horrible and disturbing incident involving Airheads I don't remember having any problems biting stuff.

I don't know, I've slept since then.


Braces suck (had em myself, no odd biting issues though), but arch expander is worse (a metal device they cement into the roof of your mouth, with a key and a crank system that breaks and then slowly pushes your upper jaw apart to make it wider. Supposedly I had this done 22 years ago to allow for more teeth room, secretly, I think it is just an undercover pear of anguish, as it hurts like a mother!

Customer Service Representative

I had one of those. It was awful. They also sliced the fibers on my teeth so they would reposition and the thing would work, which also hurt a lot. It didn't work and my teeth are all still very crowded.

Silver Crusade

What's hilarious (meaning completely f%!~ed up) is aside from the way my front teeth were twisted the main reason I got braces was because of the gaps inbetween my teeth.

A little over 10 years later I got my wisdom teeth removed. Guess what the rest of my teeth did with all the new extra space.


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@ Rysky Uggg, that really sucks. Funny how one thing always leads to something worse, in regards to things in ones mouth. (NO not THAT, or THOSE!)

(mother was a dental hygienists, so perfect teeth were a must, hell, I am 35 and never had a cavity or a filling)

Silver Crusade

1 person marked this as a favorite.
GM_Beernorg wrote:

@ Rysky Uggg, that really sucks. Funny how one thing always leads to something worse, in regards to things in ones mouth. (NO not THAT, or THOSE!)

(mother was a dental hygienists, so perfect teeth were a must, hell, I am 35 and never had a cavity or a filling)

I've heard pineapple helps.


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ROTFLMAO!


I still have a deep and personal shame for accidentally hitting my friend in the face the same day she got braces.

Dark Archive

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You know what hurts? Braces and playing the flute. It took somewhere around a year once I got my braces off for the cut on the inside of my bottom lip to fully heal. It took at least another 5 after that before the scar tissue smoothed down enough that I didn't keep accidentally biting it while eating...


Ouch Alanya...


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I played trombone in high school, I know the agony that is braces + instruments....

So much of those little wax strips the orthodontists give out to pad the spikier bits....

Community Manager

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Robot: my coworkers are too encouraging and nice, because I guess I just signed up
somehow
Katina: I DIDN’T MEAN TO HELP
I’M SORRY

Silver Crusade

Liz Courts wrote:

Robot: my coworkers are too encouraging and nice, because I guess I just signed up

somehow
Katina: I DIDN’T MEAN TO HELP
I’M SORRY

How dare you...

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

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sara marie: that was a terrible joke >.>
sara marie: i felt bad making it

katina: hehehe
katina: i thought it was pretty good

robot christ: it’s not “good”

sharaya: no, definitely not “good”
sharaya: but funny

robot chris: if this were KotoR, Sara would have gotten some darkside points
robot chris: but it was still kinda funny because hobbits

Grand Lodge RPG Superstar 2015 Top 32, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32

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Sara Marie wrote:
robot christ:

Congrats on the promotion!

;)

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

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gary: just walk past the lines at the theater going "i can't believe luke is actually vader's father after all!"

Community Manager

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[redacted]: I am giving them an education on where that magical meat comes from.

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

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gary: i'm sure it just says more about me than it does about the quality of their unicorn cuts, but i just have a problem believing that the unicorn is as pure as it can be if it comes from a place with a sign saying 3 UNICORN'S FOR PRICE OF 2

Silver Crusade

Sara Marie wrote:
gary: i'm sure it just says more about me than it does about the quality of their unicorn cuts, but i just have a problem believing that the unicorn is as pure as it can be if it comes from a place with a sign saying 3 UNICORN'S FOR PRICE OF 2

Maybe they just want to move them quick before the Paladins find out?


Sara Marie wrote:
gary: i'm sure it just says more about me than it does about the quality of their unicorn cuts, but i just have a problem believing that the unicorn is as pure as it can be if it comes from a place with a sign saying 3 UNICORN'S FOR PRICE OF 2

Mmmmm. Unicorned beef and cabbage sounds delicious.

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

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tanis: Typo of the day: Magic Scale Male

redacted a: Is that what we are calling the Blacksmith’s son now?

redacted b: No, that's "More Exploration Required"

redacted c: I would like to explore again, please.

Customer Service Representative

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Diego: Some people want to be doctors. Some people want to be trees. And some just want to [redacted].

Silver Crusade

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Sharaya wrote:
Diego: Some people want to be doctors. Some people want to be trees. And some just want to [redacted].

Yo.


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Sharaya wrote:
Diego: Some people want to be doctors. Some people want to be trees. And some just want to [redacted].

And some can manage all three at once ;) ;) ;)

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