Overheard at the Paizo office


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TriOmegaZero wrote:
Lamontius wrote:
I think everybody expects the Chelish inquisition
And nobody expects the Mwangi Inquisition.

The Mwangi Inquisition was rehearsing choreography and is running late. They'd be here already if the Springtime for Hitler dancers hadn't gone over their alloted stage time.

Oy, gevalt! I'm definitely not going to be the gob stuck cleaning up after the Poodle Lord's production of Brass'/Guccione's Caligula.


Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:
TriOmegaZero wrote:
Lamontius wrote:
I think everybody expects the Chelish inquisition
And nobody expects the Mwangi Inquisition.

The Mwangi Inquisition was rehearsing choreography and is running late. They'd be here already if the Springtime for Hitler dancers hadn't gone over their alloted stage time.

Oy, gevalt! I'm definitely not going to be the gob stuck cleaning up after the Poodle Lord's production of Brass'/Guccione's Caligula.

MEANWHILE at the Theater of Osibu...

Did I miss my cue? I feel like I missed my cue.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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liz: Wait.. where did 2013 go? I want it baaaack!!

robot chris: if we're getting some time back I would like some
robot chris: not a year, a week would be fantastic
robot chris: < not picky

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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robot chris: I would either be the Best Bard Ever, or the Worst Bard Ever

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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katina: Well, i mean, I don't know how he lives without my pictures of cats and food.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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crystal: There are now chocolate croissants in the tech team

crystal: Because reasons

sharaya: that is exciting news. I was totally just wishing we had a vending machine with chocolate things


Sara Marie wrote:

sharaya: There are now chocolate croissants in the tech team

sharaya: Because reasons

sharaya: that is exciting news. I was totally just wishing we had a vending machine with chocolate things

You'd probably find it difficult to keep it stocked.


Sara Marie wrote:
robot chris: I would either be the Best Bard Ever, or the Worst Bard Ever

Yeah, the line there, especially if you're going for comedy, is very thin.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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money chris: You do that so often, I like to imagine you're making a horrified face that morphs into a pleased face

Dark Archive Software Developer

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Katina: Just maintain eye contact and fart back at him, to assert dominance.

Liberty's Edge

Pathfinder Companion Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber
Sara Marie wrote:
robot chris: I would either be the Best Bard Ever, or the Worst Bard Ever

Gimble?

Dark Archive Software Developer

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Lissa: You can [redacted] but it is also super complicated. Requires suction cups.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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katina: If sounding like an Iron Maiden title is wrong, then I don't wanna be right.

Liberty's Edge

Will you guys hire me? As an aprentice? Please? I want to meet sara and christopher and robo chris. Plua I can bake. Also, I will bring everyone coffee.

Dark Archive

Simba, you're kind of on the wrong side of the country to work at Paizo... ;) I really don't think your grandparents would enjoy driving you to and from work every day. lol

Liberty's Edge

Im talking in the future. When I hijack an icecream truck and go on a multistate police chase. (that was a joke dear god) Trust me, I make a half decent employee. Just if you offer me paperwork, you are asking for a small campfire. Snickers does not do paperwork or maths. Unless its pathfinder maths. Snickers is still trying to wrap his head around the times tables.


Pathfinder Companion, Maps Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber
snickersimba wrote:
Im talking in the future. When I hijack an icecream truck and go on a multistate police chase. (that was a joke dear god) Trust me, I make a half decent employee. Just if you offer me paperwork, you are asking for a small campfire. Snickers does not do paperwork or maths. Unless its pathfinder maths. Snickers is still trying to wrap his head around the times tables.

I find the easiest ways to meet them is PaizoCon, although GenCon is a close second. Although not everyone goes to GenCon.

Paizo Employee Developer

Justin Franklin wrote:
snickersimba wrote:
Im talking in the future. When I hijack an icecream truck and go on a multistate police chase. (that was a joke dear god) Trust me, I make a half decent employee. Just if you offer me paperwork, you are asking for a small campfire. Snickers does not do paperwork or maths. Unless its pathfinder maths. Snickers is still trying to wrap his head around the times tables.
I find the easiest ways to meet them is PaizoCon, although GenCon is a close second. Although not everyone goes to GenCon.

Also, we typically run a "How to Write for Paizo" seminar at both conventions. You might want to reconsider that paperwork thing, though; as a publishing company, we work with a lot of paper (or at least writing).

Grand Lodge

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Sara Marie wrote:
robot chris: I would either be the Best Bard Ever, or the Worst Bard Ever

It's totally possible to be both at the same time.


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Sara Marie wrote:
robot chris: I would either be the Best Bard Ever, or the Worst Bard Ever

Best, worst, meh. It's all about the spooniness.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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liz: Today is a day for industrial electronica.

Webstore Gninja Minion

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Sara Marie wrote:
liz: Today is a day for industrial electronica.

Indeed.

I need more bass for my computer.

Liberty's Edge

Writing is fine. Just I have less focus than a hyper kitten. Be prepared to find me not working at all. I get distracted VERY easily. Though I could always get coffee for everyone during my moments of nonfocus. Today was a new record for me. I almost finished one entire paper before my brain chose to find something else more interesting and less depressing than slaves. The teacher proceeded to tell me that I had to finish the other side. I did that.

In thallisian.
Yes, I wrote an entire paper in thallisian. Ah, how I love loopholes, if the teacher doesn't tell me that it has to be done in ENGLISH, he is implying that anything is legal. One time I handed a paper in that was in pig latin.

Dark Archive

Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Adventure, Companion, Lost Omens, Rulebook Subscriber
Sara Marie wrote:
liz: Today is a day for industrial electronica.

There are days that don't call for industrial electronica?


snickersimba wrote:

Writing is fine. Just I have less focus than a hyper kitten. Be prepared to find me not working at all. I get distracted VERY easily. Though I could always get coffee for everyone during my moments of nonfocus. Today was a new record for me. I almost finished one entire paper before my brain chose to find something else more interesting and less depressing than slaves. The teacher proceeded to tell me that I had to finish the other side. I did that.

In thallisian.
Yes, I wrote an entire paper in thallisian. Ah, how I love loopholes, if the teacher doesn't tell me that it has to be done in ENGLISH, he is implying that anything is legal. One time I handed a paper in that was in pig latin.

Okay, I have to ask. Thallisian?

Grand Lodge

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Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber

I'm sure I could turn in a paper in any language I liked, but if the teacher can't grade it, I'll still get a zero.

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

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TriOmegaZero wrote:
I'm sure I could turn in a paper in any language I liked, but if the teacher can't grade it, I'll still get a zero.

OMG you should try to get a zero.

TRY OMG ZERO!

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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lissa: Shelyn's [redacted] is the best thing in Inner Sea Gods


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens Subscriber
Sara Marie wrote:
lissa: Shelyn's [redacted] is the best thing in Inner Sea Gods

This is true regardless of what was redacted.


snickersimba wrote:

Writing is fine. Just I have less focus than a hyper kitten. Be prepared to find me not working at all. I get distracted VERY easily. Though I could always get coffee for everyone during my moments of nonfocus. Today was a new record for me. I almost finished one entire paper before my brain chose to find something else more interesting and less depressing than slaves. The teacher proceeded to tell me that I had to finish the other side. I did that.

In thallisian.
Yes, I wrote an entire paper in thallisian. Ah, how I love loopholes, if the teacher doesn't tell me that it has to be done in ENGLISH, he is implying that anything is legal. One time I handed a paper in that was in pig latin.

. . . . . .

Shadow Lodge

Vic Wertz wrote:
TriOmegaZero wrote:
I'm sure I could turn in a paper in any language I liked, but if the teacher can't grade it, I'll still get a zero.

OMG you should try to get a zero.

TRY OMG ZERO!

...you're dead to me.


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TOZ wrote:
Vic Wertz wrote:
TriOmegaZero wrote:
I'm sure I could turn in a paper in any language I liked, but if the teacher can't grade it, I'll still get a zero.

OMG you should try to get a zero.

TRY OMG ZERO!

...you're dead to me.

That was the wrong alias to use.

Dark Archive

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Cheapy wrote:
That was the wrong alias to use.

THERE ARE NO RIGHT ONES! AAAAAAUUUUUUGGGGGHHHH!


QuadOmegaZero wrote:
Cheapy wrote:
That was the wrong alias to use.
THERE ARE NO RIGHT ONES! AAAAAAUUUUUUGGGGGHHHH!

so youve moved into the 4th dimension.


Wait...'TesseractOmegaZero'...?

No! Don't divide by tha...


Loup Blanc wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
robot chris: I would either be the Best Bard Ever, or the Worst Bard Ever
Best, worst, meh. It's all about the spooniness.

My bard plays the spoons. She's got a lovely masterwork set of silver spoons that she carries around to befriend animals and scare people.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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cs erik: if I ever get a pug I'll have to name him wampi.


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Sara Marie wrote:
cs erik: if I ever get a pug I'll have to name him wampi.

Or maybe Wampug?


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Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
cs erik: if I ever get a pug I'll have to name him wampi.
Or maybe Wampug?

Ignore the goblin and the...YECHHH!...disgusting cuteness! Go with your first instincts!

IN THE NAME OF THE HOLY COSMO!


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Kvantum wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
liz: Today is a day for industrial electronica.
There are days that don't call for industrial electronica?

Why, no. No there aren't.


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Master Pugwampi wrote:
Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
cs erik: if I ever get a pug I'll have to name him wampi.
Or maybe Wampug?

Ignore the goblin and the...YECHHH!...disgusting cuteness! Go with your first instincts!

IN THE NAME OF THE HOLY COSMO!

Our Cosmo, Who Art in Redmond,

Harrowed Be Thy Name.
Thy Mustache Come,
Thy Ill be Done
In Spite as it is in Hatred.
Give Us this Day our Daily Dread,
And Grant Us Misfortune
As We bestow Misfortune on Those who Irk Us.
And Lead us Not into Salvation,
But Deliver unto us Chaos.
For Thine is the Weeping, the Gnashing, and the Flailing,
Forever and Ever,
Natural 1.


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OK, Orthos just won the thread and, dare I say, the internet. How long did you work on that?

Shadow Lodge

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About five minutes.

Liberty's Edge

Wonder how mad chris anothony would be if I replaced his coffee with camomille tea. Because hes so chill. Hes a pretty cool dude. Then again most of paizo staff is.


Just out of weird curiosity, how many papers do y'all think have been written in Tolkien Elvish? One of my SIL's friends in high school was a fantastic calligrapher (her kanji and tengwa were exquisite), but I've forgotten what grade she got.

Webstore Gninja Minion

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Ashley: HEY! No one said having a soul was a requirement
Katina: Can verify. Was not a hiring requirement.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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christopher: The last words of 90% of post-apocolypse humans: "Ooh, how cute. I'm going to pet it."

Lantern Lodge

Sara Marie wrote:
christopher: The last words of 90% of post-apocolypse humans: "Ooh, how cute. I'm going to pet it."

Humans, not any smarter after the apocalypse.

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