Overheard at the Paizo office


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Paizo Employee Sales Imp

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Robot Chris: (Warning: Nic Cage)


Cosmo wrote:
Robot Chris: (Warning: Nic Cage)

that is a very important warning.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

robot chris: I accidentally clicked that banana

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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robot chris: wow, definitely don't google "nic cage puppy"

robot chris: I took this bullet for all of you
robot chris: also, seriously, back to the glitter cave


Sara Marie wrote:

robot chris: wow, definitely don't google "nic cage puppy"

robot chris: I took this bullet for all of you
robot chris: also, seriously, back to the glitter cave

you're welcome world


the 4th dog got it the worst

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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cs erik: eesh I better stop procrastinating... maybe tomorrow...

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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robot chris: what *is* the turning radius on a T-Rex?


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Sara Marie wrote:
robot chris: what *is* the turning radius on a T-Rex?

Depends. What kind of car is JJ driving these days?

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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robot chris: why be queen when you can be galatic czar overlord?

Sovereign Court

Sara Marie wrote:
robot chris: what *is* the turning radius on a T-Rex?

*looks back at six city blocks of smashed windows and flattened cars*

Digital Products Assistant

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Sara Marie Anyone have a spare chicken?

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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cs erik: there we go, Ezren has pink hair, Merisiel is a ninja, Valeros is frowning, and I pray to god this is erasable

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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Christopher: Mess with the squid, you get the tentacles.


Sara Marie wrote:
Christopher: Mess with the squid, you get the tentacles.

(^_^)


Sara Marie wrote:
Christopher: Mess with the squid, you get the tentacles.

Yeah, y'see?


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens Subscriber
Sara Marie wrote:
Christopher: Mess with the squid, you get the tentacles.

Y'all can keep the calamari. Thanks, though.


Pathfinder Adventure Subscriber

Clam it.


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens Subscriber

That pun was in-ceph(alopod)erable.

Digital Products Assistant

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Crystal There's babies in the conference room!

Christopher First girl scout cookies, now babies!

Crystal But I don't have 4 bucks! :(

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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ashley: does anyone have a nail file i could use?

christopher: Call the warden! Ashley's bustin' out!

ashley: ha, the finance department never goes to jail, we just get promoted.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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lissa: Or is time to drink from the firehose?

christopher: I didn't realize there was a non-firehose option.

lissa: Well there's a "forced to drink from the firehose" option and a "get to drink from the firehose" option. HR is big on semantics.

Dark Archive Software Developer

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Liz: Because I'm a classy g*~!$&ned lady.
Robot Chris: true story


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*moves pun die of doom from 20 to 18*


It's PUNbelievable how horrible those puns are.

Webstore Gninja Minion

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Accounting Ashley: can we have a "we didn't end up in the looney bin, kill ourselves, or murder anyone else" party after year end/tax season/GenCon this year?
Money Chris: ...I thought that was the Christmas party?

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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christopher: If your toes were gone forever, you'd be scared, too.

Webstore Gninja Minion

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Me: SELL ALL THE THINGS
Sara: SERVE ALL THE CUSTOMERS
Cosmo: DISTRIBUTE ALL THE THINGS
Sonja: ORDER ALL THE ARTS
Our jobs in a nutshell, folks. :D

Liberty's Edge

Pathfinder Companion Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber
Liz Courts wrote:
Accounting Ashley: can we have a "we didn't end up in the looney bin, kill ourselves, or murder anyone else" party after year end/tax season/GenCon this year?

Well, you can call it that, but deep down, you'll know better. You know which one of these things you've done....


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ashley that is like loudly yelling "I AM SO GLAD I DID NOT FALL DOWN AND BREAK MY LEGS" while still having a mile left in your marathon

you put the jinx on the whole thing now

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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liz: why [redacted] is applying to [redacted] and not [redacted] as specified?

christopher: Goblins.

cs erik: Are they in the works?
cs erik: Sorry, that was terrible even from me.

liz: Right now, I'm gonna blame pugwampis
liz: Because of inconsistent behavior

cs erik: that sounds familiar, witch isn't surprising.
cs erik: may be trying too hard.

cosmo: When is this not true?

cs erik: well, I'd hate for people to think that I was eidolon the chat


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Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Maps, Pathfinder Accessories, Starfinder Accessories, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Maps, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

CS Erik obviously needs more work, Sara. Way too much time on his hands.

Paizo Employee Sales Imp

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Liz: Lissa there you go
Liz: in-stock
Liz: downstairs
Liz: you could get them tomorrow

Lissa: >_> Damnit Liz

Christopher: Liz is the Mephistopheles of nerd merch. "It's just one soul, and look at the wonders that could be yours..."


Now I know where Mamet got the inspiration for Glengarry Glen Ross

Liz "ABC" Courts

Counter of Magic Beans

4 people marked this as a favorite.
Lamontius wrote:

ashley that is like loudly yelling "I AM SO GLAD I DID NOT FALL DOWN AND BREAK MY LEGS" while still having a mile left in your marathon

you put the jinx on the whole thing now

I was going to make a joke about murder, but then the power surged and took everything down at the office.

I'll get back to work now universe.


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just remember

you can't have slaughter without laughter


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Lamontius wrote:

just remember

you can't have slaughter without laughter

Uwheeheeheeheehee!

Whahahahahahahahah!
Kyaaaahahahahhahah!
Mwuhuhuahahahahah!

Dark Archive Software Developer

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Robot Chris: ugh
Robot Chris: my brain

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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robot chris: okay, I'm going on the journey to lunch and getting my bike, if I get washed away in the rain, the sekrit emergency chocolate is located RJIWHTREDACTED

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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gary: COMMENCING ROLLING PROCESS
robot chris: I suddenly feel very cold and nervous

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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christopher: When we finally replace this software, I'm going to yell "You were the chosen one!" just before punting it into a lake of lava.
gary: PUNT FIRST, MONOLOGUE LATER
gary: even if it's just a witty rejoinder
gary: should rank up there with "NO CAPES"

cs erik: Woah, Gary would make a good evil overlord

sara marie: would?

robot chris: good evil...
robot chris: good evil
robot chris: GOOD EVIL
robot chris: ...breaks...

christopher: Well, the evil overlord's had his arm and legs cut off already, and I'm the hero, so I think a little monologuing is safe at that juncture.


Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Maps, Pathfinder Accessories, Pawns, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

Hmmm...which Paizo staffer will post the 5000th post on this thread?

WHO WILL IT BE?!?!?


Feros wrote:

Hmmm...which Paizo staffer will post the 5000th post on this thread?

WHO WILL IT BE?!?!?

I may just lurk so I can snatch that away. Thought the Paizo people could potentially lock the thread, and post, then unlock it.


OOoohhhh! *Hides behind a rock and watches*

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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robot chris: tech team is aware of nostore, seems to be emminating from the deep

liz: Hope you have some Elder signs handy

gary: i am investigating

gary: probably should've brought a flashlight

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

gary: hehe it's a useful bug actually

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

robot chris: it definitely is corrupted

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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lissa: Liz: You will be happy to know that I have spent money on dice thanks to you.

liz: Don't worry, you'll get that money back via your paycheck.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

2 people marked this as a favorite.

robot chris: NEERRD

christopher: It does, in fact, take one to know one.

Dark Archive Software Developer

Gary: hmmm maybe i should eat lunch before i fall over

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