Is it wrong of me to want a his and hers Goblin wedding cake topper? And how can I convince my fiance its a good idea?
Is it wrong of me to want a his and hers Goblin wedding cake topper? And how can I convince my fiance its a good idea?
Depends: Is your fiancee a gamer, and are your guests a bunch of gamers who would think it was cool, or are they a large collection of gamers who would find it a bit strange and geeky?
I've been at a Grateful Dead themed wedding where the cake-topper was Dia de los Muertos bride-and-groom skeletons. It was a great wedding, but all the guests were either old dead heads or open-minded friends and family.
That said, if your fiancee is not a gamer and is not fully on-board with the idea of a goblin cake topper--because she has her own vision of what a proper wedding cake should be--introduce her to the southern (US) custom of having a separate bride's cake and groom's cake. The bride cake is basically a traditional wedding cake with all the hearts, flowers and frou-frou the bride might want, while the groom's cake is a sort of quirky thing made of more substantial and richer cake and made to reflect the groom's interests: football, trucks, roleplaying games with goblins, whatever.
It's also gaining popularity out of the US south. Prince William of England just decided he wanted to have one for his wedding, even though it hasn't been done before.
Lots of way to do it. My sister even had something similar for the bridesmaids because she won a wedding fair raffle and it came with a smaller cake than she needed for the wedding (and the cake was already ordered) so she used the small cake as a night-before treat for the bridesmaids. They also got the extra limo ride.
Anyway, what I'm saying is that even if your fiancee is not thrilled with a goblin cake for your wedding, she may be okay with one for the rehearsal dinner, and almost certainly won't have trouble with one for a bachelor party.
The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.
The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.
"Mommy, why do brides wear white?"
"Because white is the colour of joy, and her wedding day is the most happy day of her life.""Ah. So that's why the groom wears black!"
Yes, go with the groom's cake idea. I've seen plenty of them at weddings (live in Alabama). I've seen Nintendos, golf bags, college football themed, etc.
It's a great way to express a small bit of yourself.
The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.
Agree completely. The groom's job is to show up in a tux and say "I do." That's it. You can suggest whatever you want, but the bride has full and unquestioning VETO power.
Regardless of what's on top of it you still get cake. Just roll with it.
Yes, go with the groom's cake idea. I've seen plenty of them at weddings (live in Alabama). I've seen Nintendos, golf bags, college football themed, etc.
It's a great way to express a small bit of yourself.
The grooms cake is a decision they let you think you have, but she still has full VETO power. The good news is usually they don't really care what your cake is.
The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.
Funny, I thought it was a promise of commitment between two people, and thus belongs to both of them.
The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.Funny, I thought it was a promise of commitment between two people, and thus belongs to both of them.
I think that depends on the culture and demographics.
The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.Funny, I thought it was a promise of commitment between two people, and thus belongs to both of them.
Commitment yes. Belongs to both of them, you're mistaken. The wedding day belongs to the bride. The sooner the groom realized this the happier he'll be.
The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.
The unspoken part of this statement is that the post-wedding belongs to the husband, a lasting echo of the Western patriarchal tradition.
I suppose it depends on what sort of wedding and marriage you want.
I'd invite you to discuss it with your fiancée. Kevin suggested an excellent compromise in the form of a Groom's Cake; another might be to have the decorations of your wedding cake reflect your gaming interests in some other way (if your cake baker can't suggest at least two or three good possibilities of the top of her (his) head, you might want to consider another baker).
Regardless of what you and your bride decide, I wish you both a fantastic life together!
MI
A marriage is about union, it's not about one person or the other.
Having said that, if she really hates it, I wouldn't do it.
On the other hand, I've been to plenty of weddings with cake toppings that were definitely for the GROOM (mario brothers, cars, golf, video games like Halo, spiderman, etc). But it was with the bride's blessing of course.
So the answer is "it depends" and that's true with EVERYTHING in a marriage! It's give and take. Hopefully she doesn't hate the idea.
(Btw I think it's an awesome idea)
Is it wrong of me to want a his and hers Goblin wedding cake topper? And how can I convince my fiance its a good idea?
Unless she is a gamer and really into the hobby, I don't think this would go over really well. Representing the woman you want to marry with a goblin in a wedding gown doesn't exactly resonate with the theme of love and romance typically wanted for the occasion.
On a personal note, I'd love to see this. :P
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The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.Funny, I thought it was a promise of commitment between two people, and thus belongs to both of them.
+about a billion
As someone who is getting married in 5 weeks it is our day not just hers.
Oh and I have a friend building a 3 tiered cake with us as PC's fighting off hordes of goblins, a dragon and an Umber Hulk.
My fiancée is a gamer though...
Oh and I have a friend building a 3 tiered cake with us as PC's fighting off hordes of goblins, a dragon and an Umber Hulk.
My fiancée is a gamer though...
Righteous. \m/
We really want pics of that one.
My wife and I had a wedding cake designed like a castle or walled town with a small castle-topper. Almost 19 years ago, twas! (I managed to NOT suggest monsters climbing the walls, even tho it would have looked AWESOME!!) She wasn't a gamer then, but she had friends who were so she understood the concepts. Now, I'm still trying to convince her to GM for me. ;)
Oh and I have a friend building a 3 tiered cake with us as PC's fighting off hordes of goblins, a dragon and an Umber Hulk.My fiancée is a gamer though...
Ahh, Nerd love. It's a beautiful thing. If I ever have a grooms cake I want it to look like a severed Ilithid head or a massive D20.
Is it wrong of me to want a his and hers Goblin wedding cake topper? And how can I convince my fiance its a good idea?
I just got married last month. On my cake, we had a Mario and a Ballerina. I'm the gamer, she's the dancer. They actually looked really cute together and lots of people took pictures of the dorky pair.
So my encouragement would be to have her find some sort of figurine that's important to her, and then you do a goblin. It can be a great way to make something neat together and represent the joining of two different types of people.
My friend, I appreciate the idea you have to incorporate your hobby into your wedding. Weddings should be about fun and joy, not about "her day," shoving cake into each others' mouths, or that creepy uncle that keeps showing up. Celebrate your union in the way most fitting to you (heck, we did beanie weenies/barbeque sauce/grape jelly in crockpots,a veggie tray, and a cooler filled with 2-liter bottles of soda - there's enough stress surrounding the wedding without adding fuel to the fire).
If she appreciates the humor, more power to you.
However, as a married man I will leave you with one bit of advice. Take it as you will:
Happy wife, happy life.
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Yes, go with the groom's cake idea. I've seen plenty of them at weddings (live in Alabama). I've seen Nintendos, golf bags, college football themed, etc.
It's a great way to express a small bit of yourself.
+1. That's what I did. Mine was a "brain cake".
It's not wrong to want anything or to have your own feelings. Just remember to take into account other feelings when you have to deal with them also :)
And a compromise needs to satisfy both parties and make both parties happy. Its not a give and take. You want to vacation at the mountains and she wants the beach a give and take would be go to the beach one year and the mountains the next.
A compromise would be to go somewhere with both mountains and beach like Vancouver Island where the Mt's and Beach are right beside each other. Camping, hiking, ocean sand and sun all in the same day :)
You could have 2 ceremonies, one for you, her, the folks and straights with traditional trappings and a smaller one with the goblins and things for you, her and the gamers :)
Good luck, have fun :) and love your wife :)
But I agree with Dougs workshop- Do it for fun. Our wedding we held the supper at 4 and the dance at 6, people were mad at the changes to tradition but we said NO. Everybody usually starts supper at 7 and dance at 9 and it all ends at 2. We are changing it earlier because everybody brings kids anyway so...
We ate early, had coat-rack's at the back of the hall cordoning off the back and had tables back there with coloring books and crayons and a TV and VCR with Disney Movies. We kept the light up a bit higher and the music a bit lower so we could have conversations better during the dance and still dance. The first hour of the dance we played lots of kids music, bubble gum rock, mixed in with the usual stuff and the dance ended at 11 pm. instead of 2 pm. People who were in the area could get the kids to bet at a relatively decent time, and people who had to drive a bit could get home fairly decently instead of having to stay the night.
As it turned out, everyone liked our idea much better and had a great time :)
I think that depends on the culture and demographics.The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.Funny, I thought it was a promise of commitment between two people, and thus belongs to both of them.
...and the brides' parents who sometimes try to cajole their wants into the project when they're the ones "traditionally" footing the bill. *cough*
The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.
Because nothing says "A long lasting and equal partnership" like a completely unequal beginning. Yup yup.
Commitment yes. Belongs to both of them, you're mistaken. The wedding day belongs to the bride. The sooner the groom realized this the happier he'll be.The wedding day belongs to the bride. Give her what she wants.Funny, I thought it was a promise of commitment between two people, and thus belongs to both of them.
You sound kind of bitter, are you speaking from personal experience?
I married a gamer geek just like me. The wedding was 50/50, we were both responsible for input on decoration, theme, etc. We used music from Final Fantasy IV(the original SNES midi), and once we arrived at the reception hall, we were introduced with the Throne Room music from Star Wars Episode 4. So yeah, a groom is absolutely entitled to make it his day too.
Righteous. \m/Oh and I have a friend building a 3 tiered cake with us as PC's fighting off hordes of goblins, a dragon and an Umber Hulk.
My fiancée is a gamer though...
We wanted to do something like that with ours, with our painted pewter minis on spiraling staircases going between the layers of the cake, but there was no way could get them all painted in time, and by that point things were already way too complicated with a ton of last minute changes(had to change the date 1 month before the day of), so that idea fell by the wayside.
Is it wrong of me to want a his and hers Goblin wedding cake topper? And how can I convince my fiance its a good idea?
From a gamer point of view: goblin cake toppper= awesome!
From a non-gamer view: goblin cake topper= ew, what?Your marrying her, you know your lady, ask her, if no then suggest a compromise. I think the groom's cake is a wonderful idea!
When we got married it would have been awesome to have a gamer cake but when your 19 and still in college you get the Walmart three tiered wedding cake. Oh well.
We have a gamer christmas tree though, covered in minis acting out combat scenes topped with the Gargantuan Red Dragon.
::sigh:: I wish I could say that we worked on our wedding together, but he simply had no interest in the planing what so ever, he really did just want to show up in the tux and say "I do". I tried to include him, he even forced me to pick out his tux rental and shoes for him and when I asked him what he wanted the reply was "I don't care". So his best man went with me so we could coordinate the tuxes and the grooms men.
So don't assume that the men were forced into submission by the bridezilla's will, some really just don't give a d!@#.