Deep 6 FaWtL


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Vidmaster7 wrote:
Rock n' Roll Troll wrote:
Vidmaster7 wrote:
I think their is a 80's song all about that. I can't seem to remember it atm.
Every 80s song is about that. Or cocaine.
Don't forget the occasional love song about stalking! Also somewhere in their is one about sunglasses.

That would be ZZ Top's entire catalog.


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Don't remember that one.


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I'll have to look for it its been awhile.


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I have all the Beastie Boys albums.


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I get to run twenty three feet of cable along the edges of the ceiling in our living room so we can connect the PS4 to the Internets.

The Exchange

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I managed to do Tess Greymane Monster Hunt run to completion in Hearthstone. It all ended up with Aya Blackpaw, lots of gangups, and scavenging with cult of the wolf for my gangups back.

Now for Darius and Toki.


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Oh and in random news, I practiced a bit of feline dentistry today.

My mothers tom-cat, aka Oscar the (former) Orc-cat, have had a rotting lower canine-tooth for some time now, and it was starting to really trouble him when eating, to the point he no longer accepted even semi-solid foods.

He's a 11 year old rescue cat in somewhat poor health (we took him over after a case of Tick-borne encephalitis that almost cost him his life, and he's had a second case which sent him on a 11 day stay at the animal clinic, in the time we've had him) so he's a bit "touched", probably due to the encephalitis, but mostly a friendly and loving cat.

My mother, having already tried to pull out the tooth, had received quite the clawing in her last attempt, so she wanted me to give it a try.
So I take Oscar, place him at the end of a large towel and roll him up tightly like some kind of cat-spring- roll, with his head sticking out one end.
Already I'm getting quite the yowling and spitting...grab a hold around him with my thighs, forcing his jaw open with one hand (letting him gnash on a finger while doing so...) and applying a flat plier to the canine in question.
One swift yank and the tooth is out (its in a complete state of decay, very very smelly decay), and I clean out his wound with some cotton, rinse it out with a syringe and lastly apply some antibacterial solution to the wound.

Only downside is that I think it'll be quite some time before he'll let me anywhere near him again ^^'.


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Now do all of Sharoth's cats!


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captain yesterday wrote:
John Napier 698 wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
Crookshanks has learned a very valuable lesson about the futility of trying to hide stuff from her mother.
Doesn't she know? All mothers are psychic.

She does now!

This is how teenagers end up with flip phones.

The best kind of phone!


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Just a Mort wrote:
John Napier 698 wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
Crookshanks has learned a very valuable lesson about the futility of trying to hide stuff from her mother.
Doesn't she know? All mothers are psychic.
Do I get that when I become a mom? Cos I don't feel very psychic at the moment.

Oh, trust me! When you raise a child from birth, you get an inherent +20 bonus to Sense Motive checks on that child.

It's really pretty alarming how easy it is for me to say, "That's a lie. That's the truth. He's hiding something" for both Impii.

And it frequently extends to a +10 Sense Motive against all kids in your kids' age group, making them fear and dread you.


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John Napier 698 wrote:
I was in the Army for three years. Reading pornography was as common as smoking cigarettes.

...

Reading?

The Exchange

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John Napier 698 wrote:
I was in the Army for three years. Reading pornography was as common as smoking cigarettes.

Arrghh nooooo...my eyes! *covers eyes with a paw*

The Exchange

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NobodysHome wrote:
Just a Mort wrote:
John Napier 698 wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
Crookshanks has learned a very valuable lesson about the futility of trying to hide stuff from her mother.
Doesn't she know? All mothers are psychic.
Do I get that when I become a mom? Cos I don't feel very psychic at the moment.

Oh, trust me! When you raise a child from birth, you get an inherent +20 bonus to Sense Motive checks on that child.

It's really pretty alarming how easy it is for me to say, "That's a lie. That's the truth. He's hiding something" for both Impii.

And it frequently extends to a +10 Sense Motive against all kids in your kids' age group, making them fear and dread you.

I have no ranks in sense motive. Period. I'm as insensitive as a lump of wood.

The Exchange

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Kjeldorn wrote:

Oh and in random news, I practiced a bit of feline dentistry today.

My mothers tom-cat, aka Oscar the (former) Orc-cat, have had a rotting lower canine-tooth for some time now, and it was starting to really trouble him when eating, to the point he no longer accepted even semi-solid foods.

He's a 11 year old rescue cat in somewhat poor health (we took him over after a case of Tick-borne encephalitis that almost cost him his life, and he's had a second case which sent him on a 11 day stay at the animal clinic, in the time we've had him) so he's a bit "touched", probably due to the encephalitis, but mostly a friendly and loving cat.

My mother, having already tried to pull out the tooth, had received quite the clawing in her last attempt, so she wanted me to give it a try.
So I take Oscar, place him at the end of a large towel and roll him up tightly like some kind of cat-spring- roll, with his head sticking out one end.
Already I'm getting quite the yowling and spitting...grab a hold around him with my thighs, forcing his jaw open with one hand (letting him gnash on a finger while doing so...) and applying a flat plier to the canine in question.
One swift yank and the tooth is out (its in a complete state of decay, very very smelly decay), and I clean out his wound with some cotton, rinse it out with a syringe and lastly apply some antibacterial solution to the wound.

Only downside is that I think it'll be quite some time before he'll let me anywhere near him again ^^'.

Would it have been more comfortable if you brought him to the vet?

But at least the tooth is out. Decayed teeth cause problems.

Yeah I wouldn't be surprised if he started yowling the moment you got close...


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
Orthos wrote:

...

They were subject to a leveraged buyout in the mid-00s. What this means in layman's terms is that a new company bought TRU from its prior owners, but to get the money for said purchase they took out a huge loan, using the company they were just about to purchase as their collateral. Yes that is legal, bizarrely enough. But it left them with a huge debt that they never made enough profit to pay off, and now they literally can't.
...
I'm sure there are significant differences, but really that doesn't sound too different than taking out a car loan or a mortgage (to buy a house, not refi or cash out equity). You're getting money to buy something, and using that thing you are about to buy to guarantee the loan.

The big one being that if you default on your car loan, you don't put thousands of people out of work...


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Interesting Moments in Chaperoning
or, "Why being a male chaperone for female students can be... awkward."

NobodysHome: OK, just keep in mind you need to tell me where you're going and who you'll be with.
14-year-old girl: Well, (Other Girl)'s mother doesn't want her to have sexy underwear, so she found I's bra and threw it away so she's got nothing left but a thong, so she wants to go to Victoria's Secret to get some more sexy underwear, and I figure as long as we're going I'll find some for myself as well.
NH: Er... OK...

Nobody's Reasoning:

I have a simple list of my duties as a chaperone:
(1) Keep the kids safe
(2) Get the kids where they're supposed to be
(3) Keep the kids in line by being as conservative as the most-conservative parent would want me to be

This is an ordered list; if a kid is in danger, then none of the other rules matter, etc.

So, the hardest part about being a chaperone is building that relationship of trust with the kids so that if anything goes wrong, they're not going to call their parents (too far away to help) nor their teacher (too busy to help), but will go straight for you, since it's your job to be there for them. The girl with whom I was speaking was already a "borderline" case (the teacher hadn't wanted her on the trip because of disciplinary issues), and I'd built up some trust with her because she was a little mini-punker and it was ludicrously easy for me to build a rapport with someone with whom I would have been good friends maybe 35 years ago.

So the last thing I wanted to do was break that trust by reporting something that's an issue between undies girl and her parents: Her parents were informed that she would be allowed to shop unsupervised at the mall, they could have checked that there was a Victoria's Secret there, and they gave her cash to spend anyway.

So I chose "safety" over "snitching". I still feel I chose wisely.


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Drejk wrote:
John Napier 698 wrote:
I was in the Army for three years. Reading pornography was as common as smoking cigarettes.

...

Reading?

Not everyone had their own videotape players. But, there are bookstores. This was in the late 1980's.


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But... Reading?

I expected that you would be more focused on looking on the photos.

:P


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True, there were a lot of photos, and I plead the fifth. But there were also articles and interviews. It was a running joke in my unit that your room would pass the First Sergeant's inspection if you left a bottle of Gin and a couple of Porno mags out in the open.


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Going to be off-line for a while. I need to go pick up my mother's meds.


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Drejk wrote:

But... Reading?

I expected that you would be more focused on looking on the photos.

:P

Reminds me of the plot line in Kurt Vonnegut's "Breakfast of Champions" where the science fiction writer Kilgore Trout had only been published in porn mags because it was an easy place to get his work accepted, since the text was just filler in between the photos.


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My senior year in high school i worked for the county as part of a roving band of laborers, mostly mowing cemeteries and painting fire hydrants.

In every bathroom in every municipality maintenance garage had porn mags in them.

And since you can't s#$% and Jack it at the same time I can only surmise someone was reading them.

Shadow Lodge

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gran rey de los mono wrote:
Orthos wrote:

...

They were subject to a leveraged buyout in the mid-00s. What this means in layman's terms is that a new company bought TRU from its prior owners, but to get the money for said purchase they took out a huge loan, using the company they were just about to purchase as their collateral. Yes that is legal, bizarrely enough. But it left them with a huge debt that they never made enough profit to pay off, and now they literally can't.
...
I'm sure there are significant differences, but really that doesn't sound too different than taking out a car loan or a mortgage (to buy a house, not refi or cash out equity). You're getting money to buy something, and using that thing you are about to buy to guarantee the loan.

I wasn't aware you could do that. I've never taken a loan for anything but college debt, and I'm not doing so again if I can help it.


3 people marked this as a favorite.
Kjeldorn wrote:

Oh and in random news, I practiced a bit of feline dentistry today.

My mothers tom-cat, aka Oscar the (former) Orc-cat, have had a rotting lower canine-tooth for some time now, and it was starting to really trouble him when eating, to the point he no longer accepted even semi-solid foods.

He's a 11 year old rescue cat in somewhat poor health (we took him over after a case of Tick-borne encephalitis that almost cost him his life, and he's had a second case which sent him on a 11 day stay at the animal clinic, in the time we've had him) so he's a bit "touched", probably due to the encephalitis, but mostly a friendly and loving cat.

My mother, having already tried to pull out the tooth, had received quite the clawing in her last attempt, so she wanted me to give it a try.
So I take Oscar, place him at the end of a large towel and roll him up tightly like some kind of cat-spring- roll, with his head sticking out one end.
Already I'm getting quite the yowling and spitting...grab a hold around him with my thighs, forcing his jaw open with one hand (letting him gnash on a finger while doing so...) and applying a flat plier to the canine in question.
One swift yank and the tooth is out (its in a complete state of decay, very very smelly decay), and I clean out his wound with some cotton, rinse it out with a syringe and lastly apply some antibacterial solution to the wound.

Only downside is that I think it'll be quite some time before he'll let me anywhere near him again ^^'.

Let him come to you. He'll remember that you love him.


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Just a Mort wrote:

Would it have been more comfortable if you brought him to the vet?

...

Maybe.

He hates the vet though, like yowling, spitting and peeing all over his carrier hates the vet. The only thing he might have received there, I didn't give him was probably some kind of sedative...oh and professional care, and a accredited staff, and...
Yea...
Think of it as bunch of cheap-ass ex-farmers (The vet on a Sunday! think of the cost!) doing as well as they can, with the tools at hand ^^.

John Napier 698 wrote:
Let him come to you. He'll remember that you love him.

I'm counting on it, and loading up on cat treats for my next visit home :P


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Turns out when both parents are working you can do things like plan a vacation.

And it turns out vacations aren't as hard to plan as our parents made them out to be.

Who knew!


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Of course the whole vacation thing has been streamlined significantly since I was a kid.


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I am supposed to work and GM tomorrow.

Of course my throat picked today to become sore... Blergh.


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The General and Crookshanks are making a Demogorgon cake for Crookshanks' birthday this week.

The Exchange

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I didn't want to plan vacation in Hokkaido because I knew nothing about the place and I am directionally challenged so I wouldn't want to give the wrong directions to people. Also in countryside areas like Hokkaido, if you're late and miss a train, its good luck have fun because there's nothing to do at the station and next train is in 1-2h. My BF's family isn't that much into punctuality.

I do understand about the reasoning behind that if you're on vacation you shouldn't keep rushing like you were at work...but I did tell him off the last time at tokyo disneyland when because we were at the breakfast buffet late and they were closing the buffet.

The Exchange

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Kjeldorn wrote:
Just a Mort wrote:

Would it have been more comfortable if you brought him to the vet?

...

Maybe.

He hates the vet though, like yowling, spitting and peeing all over his carrier hates the vet. The only thing he might have received there, I didn't give him was probably some kind of sedative...oh and professional care, and a accredited staff, and...
Yea...
Think of it as bunch of cheap-ass ex-farmers (The vet on a Sunday! think of the cost!) doing as well as they can, with the tools at hand ^^.

John Napier 698 wrote:
Let him come to you. He'll remember that you love him.

I'm counting on it, and loading up on cat treats for my next visit home :P

Hmm. I guess you guys are kind of uncertified vets? =)


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Farmers in rural areas often don't have veterinarians nearby. They would have to pick up bits and pieces of veterinary knowledge as they go.


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The on-shift road captain just tried to get me to do a couple hours extra tonight at midnight. I said no thank you, I have to be at my garage at 2:30 PM. Honestly, the nerve of these idiots. Go ask someone with a car. I'm not a f%$@ing miracle worker.


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I will have my revenge. The party will suffer.


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Help me, FaWtL, you're my only hope!

As you know, I'm writing a first-person journal for my female gnome rogue in Shiro's campaign.

At the first inn we'd seen in weeks, the dwarf and the inquisitor stole the first baths, then the inquisitor got all uppity insisting on a soft fluffy robe to go downstairs to the bar. So my rogue suggested she just go naked, and she said, "Only gnomes do THAT," so of course...

...and as my nekkid gnome strolled in all her glory up to the bar to order a drink, the (female) bard spotted her, and, according to the GM, rolled a 27 Perform check to perform a hilarious series of "naked gnome jokes".

So of course my gnome grabbed a chair and listened.

But here's my challenge: I have to do the writeup, and I need some good "naked gnome jokes" to fit the situation.

HELP!

The Exchange

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Didn't you want to see my @ss?

*And flash @ss in question*

Everyone's above 18 right? Nekkid jokes tend towards dirty territory.


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What did the naked gnome say to the hairdresser?

Take a little off the fop!

Im sorry. I dont tell many jokes.


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QUE?


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Urgh.

So, I've tiraded about the "huge" crime rate under the BART tracks before; ever since I was a kid, there's been a handful of muggings a month along the BART tracks; it was Albany's only significant violent crime.

And BART, in spite of being able to spend billions on expansions to other cities, couldn't afford a few hundred thousand to put cameras along the greenway.

So yep, we have our first homicide since 2015, a shooting a block from Impus Minor's school and two blocks from Impus Major's. On the BART tracks, of course. In broad daylight on a Sunday.

The kids are now forbidden from walking under the BART tracks for any reason. There are equally-good paths that do not risk life and limb.


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How many gnomes does it take to make a porno?

None, it was all an illusion.


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Not a naked gnome joke, just a gnome joke.

Why aren't there any Half-Gnomes?

They're just too adorable to chop in half.


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o_O


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Once you go gnome, you'll never go home.


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Google chrome or a large tome won't help you find that gnome she will always roam Trying to find a nice home in the soft loam... But her hair is a mess so bring her a nice comb?


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This is terrible. Someone is actually asking for jokes, and I'm coming up blank.


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Why did the gnome get thrown out of the nudist colony? She kept getting in everyone's hair.


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What did the elephant say to the naked gnome? How do you breathe through that tiny thing?


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Never hit a gnome with glasses. Use a club.


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What's a good pickup line for a gnome? I'm no weatherman, but I know you're getting three inches tonight.


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Why do gnomes laugh so much when they play soccer naked? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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