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It's Impus Major's last "free" day of summer vacation, it's 11:00 am, and he's still in bed. And "Good Dad" and "Bad Dad" are warring: Do I let him keep sleeping in, or do I bring a Ziploc bag full of ice down there and drop it on his naked torso?

EDIT: Drat! He woke up!

EDIT 2: And isn't it dad's JOB to wander around the house naked, scratching himself, on your final day of summer vacation? I think it is...


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Planning a sequel to my Three Clerics / Firestarters campaign. Will need to stat out plenty of stuff...


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Aaaaaarg! What the heck, Walmart?! There are three good pass ways on the side I want, and one is one-way (into Walmart) the other just pops around into the one way... the one that feeds back into Walmart. So maybe I go out the front and turn left? No - it's a right turn only, and that leads me around to either going well out of my way (no u-turn signs abound) or taking a left in the first road of my convenience... which just so happens to be the road that is partially fused with the Walmart parking lot. What is this, Hotel CaliWalmart?

EDIT: "I go" not "Ingo"...


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Tacticslion wrote:

Aaaaaarg! What the heck, Walmart?! There are three good pass ways on the side I want, and one is one-way (into Walmart) the other just pops around into the one way... the one that feeds back into Walmart. So maybe I go out the front and turn left? No - it's a right turn only, and that leads me around to either going well out of my way (no u-turn signs abound) or taking a left in the first road of my convenience... which just so happens to be the road that is partially fused with the Walmart parking lot. What is this, Hotel CaliWalmart?

EDIT: "I go" not "Ingo"...

Er... I believe that all Walmarts are designed that way. That's why I've never gone into one. The Lawful never escape.


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[Insert rant about Wal-Mart here.]

[Shake fist impotently now.]


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Life Sized Cap'n Yesterday prop wrote:

[Insert rant about Wal-Mart here.]

[Shake fist impotently now.]

Well, it helps immensely that there isn't a Walmart within 20 minutes of my house. I think it's the high price of real estate around here, but there just aren't any close enough to be convenient... especially with a huge two-story Target sitting right here in Albany.


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The Walmart by my house is in the former Montgomery Ward space in the mall, so not only is it impossible to navigate, but the lighting is permanently set at "zombie twilight" level of gloom.
Creepy as hell.


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lisamarlene wrote:

The Walmart by my house is in the former Montgomery Ward space in the mall, so not only is it impossible to navigate, but the lighting is permanently set at "zombie twilight" level of gloom.

Creepy as hell.

Had a Piggly Wiggly up in NC once that had similar. Didn't bother me at the time because I never watched zombie stuff. It did when I went back to visit a decade later... >.>

Also, I didn't mention at the time, but thanks for the song! XD


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Hmm... My parents town got a piggly wiggly to replace their foodlands. I'm still not sure what to make of the chain...
Their quality is decent, but their name is stupid, and their prices are a bit high.
Also... I feel that any business with that name should have focused on pork. Like, totally focused on pork. Have it be their "thing".


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

I've been around Piggly Wiggly my whole life. :-)


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People don't realize just how hard it is to do nothing. For one thing, how do you know when you're done?


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The worst time to have a heart attack would probably during a game of charades.


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My wallet is like an onion, when I open it I cry.


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I'm not clumsy. It's just that the floor hates me, and the table and chairs are bullies.


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Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Usually I just let her sleep, though.


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You never truly understand something until you can explain it to your grandmother.


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Some useful collective nouns for groups of animals:

Gaggle of Geese
Herd of Cattle
F**@load of Bees
Pile of Eagles
Uneasy Partnership of Coyotes
101.5 "The Hammer" of Moths
Wad of Raccoons
Who Cares? of Voles
Business Lunch of Meerkats
Duffel Bag of Seals
S&@~storm of Sparrows
Typist Pool of Iguanas
Martin Landau of Goats
Small, Intimate Gathering of Crocodiles


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Is this Freehold the Squirrel?


The Game Hamster wrote:

Hmm... My parents town got a piggly wiggly to replace their foodlands. I'm still not sure what to make of the chain...

Their quality is decent, but their name is stupid, and their prices are a bit high.
Also... I feel that any business with that name should have focused on pork. Like, totally focused on pork. Have it be their "thing".

Because I grew up around them, I never really noticed. Well, that and Windixie, I suppose.

Either way, I was vaguely incensed by this new place "Publix" we were forced to shop when it eventually opened up.

Of course, I was also stupid, so.

captain yesterday wrote:
I've been around Piggly Wiggly my whole life. :-)

Curious: Poe's law is in full effect and I have no idea if you're making a joke or an allusion I don't get, or actually being honest. XD


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
Is this Freehold the Squirrel?

... huh.

Also, the way she's all, like, "Yeah. Sure. This is fine. Aaaaaall the time."

>.<


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

Alright! Wedding invitation successfully recreated!

The poem excerpt used.

Meet me
At the crossroads
Meet me
At the edge of town
Outskirts of the city
Just you and I
And the evening sky
- The Soft Parade, by Jim Morrison.


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Tacticslion wrote:
The Game Hamster wrote:

Hmm... My parents town got a piggly wiggly to replace their foodlands. I'm still not sure what to make of the chain...

Their quality is decent, but their name is stupid, and their prices are a bit high.
Also... I feel that any business with that name should have focused on pork. Like, totally focused on pork. Have it be their "thing".

Because I grew up around them, I never really noticed. Well, that and Windixie, I suppose.

Either way, I was vaguely incensed by this new place "Publix" we were forced to shop when it eventually opened up.

Of course, I was also stupid, so.

captain yesterday wrote:
I've been around Piggly Wiggly my whole life. :-)
Curious: Poe's law is in full effect and I have no idea if you're making a joke or an allusion I don't get, or actually being honest. XD

Piggly Wiggly is a staple of small town Wisconsin, if it has less than 10,000 people it has a Piggly Wiggly. :-)


Yeah, that seemed true for me on the East Coast, too! XD


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

I spent all night running around getting tools and helping an old neighbor fix his car.

So I'm pretty wiped out, and tomorrow seems to be important for some reason, so I'm off to bed. :-)


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
Is this Freehold the Squirrel?

that bastard polymorphed AND recorded me?!


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Tacticslion wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:
Is this Freehold the Squirrel?

... huh.

Also, the way she's all, like, "Yeah. Sure. This is fine. Aaaaaall the time."

>.<

that's how you know it's me.


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
You never truly understand something until you can explain it to your grandmother.

"...any scientist who couldn't explain to an eight-year-old what he was doing was a charlatan."

Kurt Vonnegut, "Cat's Cradle"


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
The worst time to have a heart attack would probably during a game of charades.

Which happened to comedian Dick Shawn (He was Hitler in the original "The Producers"). He had a heart attack onstage. Everyone thought it was part of the act.


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(This is my mutant superpower, btw. I am a FOUNTAIN of useless random blather.)


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115 this time.


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lisamarlene wrote:
(This is my mutant superpower, btw. I am a FOUNTAIN of useless random blather.)

It could be worse. Your power could be the ability to sense apathy in cats.


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Wow, the USPS is very efficient. According to the tracking, a package I ordered both arrived at and left the Salt Lake City distribution center at 3:57am yesterday morning, and then managed to simultaneously arrive at and leave the local distribution center at 11:41pm tonight.


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
lisamarlene wrote:
(This is my mutant superpower, btw. I am a FOUNTAIN of useless random blather.)
It could be worse. Your power could be the ability to sense apathy in cats.

Yes you detect it. (at least you could always detect cats.)


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*still looking for pastries*


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

Hmm, I seem to remember something important going on today.

Starfinder hasn't shipped yet, so it's not that.

I gotta work tonight, but that's not important.

Oh well, whatever it was it couldn't have been that important.


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This is going to be hilarious!!


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captain yesterday wrote:

Hmm, I seem to remember something important going on today.

Starfinder hasn't shipped yet, so it's not that.

I gotta work tonight, but that's not important.

Oh well, whatever it was it couldn't have been that important.

Is today the day that you send me the $37,073.24 that you don't owe me?


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:

Hmm, I seem to remember something important going on today.

Starfinder hasn't shipped yet, so it's not that.

I gotta work tonight, but that's not important.

Oh well, whatever it was it couldn't have been that important.

Is today the day that you send me the $37,073.24 that you don't owe me?

But I gave that to Sharoth to give to you! "I'm going right over, I'll just take it for you, small bills will do" he said!!

You'll just have to take it up with him. :-)


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I've been thinking about taking one of the spare bedrooms in my house, putting up planter boxes, and growing assorted fungi. Then I could call it my "Mush Room".


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SHHAAAAAAARRRRRROOOOOOOTTTTTHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!![/khan]


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
lisamarlene wrote:
(This is my mutant superpower, btw. I am a FOUNTAIN of useless random blather.)

My super power is being able to parallel park anything in one try.

Captain Yesterday fun fact: I once parallel parked a truck loaded with rock and a trailer with a skid loader on it.


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Why deliverypeople are beginning to HATE NobodysHome's house:

  • The aforementioned, "Ship every item separately" phenomenon
  • NobodysFatherInLaw has a "deliveries get stolen from his porch" problem, so he's refurnishing his house... by having all the furniture delivered here. Right next to me right now is a 2'x18"x3' box of somethingorother. We get a couple a week, and he shows up on weekends in his pickup to remove them for us
  • NobodysHome's approach to buying new items that may or may not be useful:
    (1) Order a folding ladder
    (2) Test it for sturdiness and functionality
    (3) Pleased with its performance, order a second

  • So yeah, we're getting a couple of 30-40 pound boxes delivered per week. I guess it's good exercise for the deliverypeople...


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    How to make Skyrim Rampage Captain Yesterday cry:
    (1) Decide that Impus Minor's computer is a piece of junk and build a new one from scratch, using parts recommended by "Mr. Supermachine" Shiro
    (2) Let Impus Minor install Skyrim
    (3) Have Skyrim tell him, "Right now you're seeing the screen in the highest-possible resolution. Please wait while we calibrate to your computer. Resolution will go down."
    (4) Have Skyrim say, "Oops. Never mind. Just leaving things at Ultra-High, thanks."
    (5) Have Impus Minor report 90 fps during firefights.

    I gotta admit it, I seem to have built a solid machine.


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    Ask yourself, Is this related somehow to all the other pages on Paizo?
    The answer, is of course, yes, and is, in fact, related to the belly-button lint some poor sap removed from his girlfriends belly-button, who lives two counties over from Pulg, last night.
    Why this specific thing you might ask?
    Why, because of the interconnectedness of all things.
    I discuss in detail in my new book "The Interconnectedness of All Things". Buy it today for only $14.99 or commercial equivalent.


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    Pulg dreamt he was the belly-lint.

    Or perhaps the belly-lint dreamt that it was Pulg, and by flapping its wings, caused a tidal wave to engulf Switzerland.


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    My chakras! They cannae take any more! I've reached a new octave of enlightenment, and without having to shove a jade egg up my [censored], this time!


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    That would be the general point.
    I say spend the twenty bucks (hmm? Oh no, I said twenty before, who ever mentioned fifteen measly bucks?) and get yourself truly enlightened with my new book.
    Or for a mere fifty dollars a day, you could have me investigate your next existential crisis. Ten for retainer-ship, payable in a lump sum at the end of the month.


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    Grrr! Last night the topic of addiction came up during dinner, and my mother-in-law demanded that Homunculus #1 promise to never ever try illegal drugs. And I worry about Homunculus #1, 'cause he has what I think is an addiction-prone personality.

    Spoilered for religion reference:

    Spoiler:
    This woman is a born-again, so I presume she has at least heard the Adam & Eve story, and yet seems to have learned nothing from it.

    The best way to get someone to do something, particularly a child, is to tell them never to do it.


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    The best way to get some-one to not do something is to describe to them, what exactly it does to the body, and of course do so honestly.

    At least, that's what I've discovered in my relatively short lifespan.


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    Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

    I work tonight, at least it isn't for an ungodly 8 hours.

    Just a barely tolerable 4 and a half.

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