Deep 6 FaWtL


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
Do they make dragon-sized dentures?

Yeah, out of half-melted knights...


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The Game Hamster wrote:
Kileanna wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:
I used to hate math, until I realized that decimals have a point.
In Spain the point is for thousands and the comma for decimals. It's our revenge against people who doesn't want to adopt the metric system xD
Just remember: there are two kinds of countries in the world; those that use the metric system, and those with a flag on the moon.

{Squints skywards} I see no flags... Where's our flag?


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Cross-posted from the music thread because watching it just makes me smile and grin, and maybe someone could use a pick-me-up.


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Tequila Sunrise wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
this is only more fuel for the flames of my math hatred.
Shhh...shhhhh, math is always with you Freehold, whether you know it or not. ;)

creates math free zone around himself, dies almost instantly


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How to get the most out of your hiking experience:

Step 1: Remember to pack plenty of water and choose an experience-appropriate trail.

Step 2: Go to trail, find a bronze tablet dedicated to a pioneer named Zebulon. Hm, I thought that one was a Star Trek original.

Step 3: Start hiking and enjoy the scenery. Hm, my legs are getting a workout sooner than I thought, I must be out of shape.

Step 4: Realize you brought too much water and no insect repellant. Damned mosquitos are everywhere.

Step 5: I could be in the gym, watching toothier wildlife on the Discovery Channel. I'd go back, but I spent $15 bucks to get into the park, and dammit I'm getting my money's worth!

Step 6: My lungs and my legs, precious, they burns us! What ever made me think this was a good idea? I'm not ready for the medium-difficulty trail, the air is too thin up here. I'm determined to keep going though, I've gone so far and there's a famous view at the top...

Step 7: Too exhausted to enjoy the top, must boost blood sugar with snacks...should have bought a postcard of the view at the gift shop and saved myself the trouble.

Step 8: Going up is the hard part, but going down is the dangerous part...almost trip and fall down a cliff three times hiking back down.

Step 9: Get home, shower, Facebook the photos you took hiking. A few thumbs up a day later, that's it?!

Step 10: Despite everything, succumb to the urge to do it all over again next week. :)


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You should get one of these.


gran rey de los mono wrote:
Proper punctuation makes the difference between a sentence that's well-written, and one that's well, written.

That was... written well!


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Sharoth wrote:
You must lead a charmed life to get such a quarky grade.
gran rey de los mono wrote:
I'm sure his life has it's ups and downs, sometimes he's on top, sometimes the bottom, and occasionally it's all just strange.
gran rey de los disclaimer wrote:
For those who don't follow, quarks come in 6 types: up, down, top, bottom, charm, and strange.
Sharoth wrote:
I think his grade was just gluoned.
gran rey de los mono wrote:
Maybe he just saw a good idea and lepton it.

The only thing that makes me angry about these is that I neither thought of, nor posted, them first. Dang it, guys! So good!


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The Game Hamster wrote:
You don't have a conspiracy theorist alias?? I'm shocked.

My mom was an investigative journalist and considered Woodward, Bernstein, and Hunter S. Thompson her idols, an alias would only dilute the conspiracy theories i've built up over the years.


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Why It Sucks to Be a Male Hyena


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I only have a few minutes of time left on my Hotspot. Will try to post for several hours at a time from my local library from now until Monday. Good night everyone.


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179 this time.


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Rysky wrote:
I graduated HS with a 0.8 GPA...

I know this is like 4 walls of text late but I just wanted to say WOW.

Where you just like naw son I'm not doing none of that.

Of course I've worked with guys that graduated high school that could not read or do basic math. so I believe it.


Conspiracy theory time!

Is Connla the secret sibling of Dou-Bral and Shelyn? Or maybe the spirit of Dou-Bral secretly freed from the chains of Zon-Kuthon?

Is The Forgotten one of the now-considered "lost" various gods (like the Peacock Spirit, Count Ranalc, or what-have-you)?

Someone who has more time needs to put these in the conspiracy theory thread (wherever that is)! XD


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My student was late for class, claiming he was in the bathroom. I think he was just stalling.


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Joseph wouldn't me through the doors to inspect his room. I think he was Stalin.


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I tried to follow fashion by wearing tight jeans, but I couldn't pull them off.


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I used to have an hourglass that would run out in only 30 minutes. I guess it was filled with quicksand.


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I signed up for a weight loss class. They said we each needed to come up with a mantra. I thought "Weight loss mantra? Fat chants!"


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~shakes my head~ These jokes make me see Red.


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I wrote a novel about religious women. The library filed it in the nun-fiction section.


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I guess I will just Lenin go of that feeling.


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I wouldn't know a good cow pun if it was steering me right in the face.


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I hosted a dinner for nursery rhyme characters. The 3 Little Pigs ordered from the vegetarian menu, but Mary Had a Little Lamb.


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I saw a shooting star last night and it was all I could have wished for.


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
I wouldn't know a good cow pun if it was steering me right in the face.

My problem is want to milk a good pun far to much.


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
I wouldn't know a good cow pun if it was steering me right in the face.

That is the udder truth.


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A helpful rule of grammar: Double negatives are a serious no-no.


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Before taking a trigonometry test I always prayed for a sine from above.


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My son had a spelling test where each of the words was a synonym for incorrect. He was able to write every wrong.


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The retired English teacher filed for disability, claiming post-grammatic stress.


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My daughter's swim team has a new coach who asks like she knows everything. Her name is Claire Buoyant.


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Sharoth wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:
I wouldn't know a good cow pun if it was steering me right in the face.
That is the udder truth.

I'm glad we both went a different way with that one.


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Teaching calculus is hard. The kids keeping going off on tangents.


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I should do my Philosophy homework, but I just Kant.


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
I should do my Philosophy homework, but I just Kant.

Oh that joke should be under Locke and key.


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Would you say that the frost that forms on a daycare center's windows is nursery rime?


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Two cows are standing in a field. The first cow says "I was artificially inseminated this morning." The second cow says "Really?" The first cow says "Yep, no bull."


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Deja moo is the feeling that you've herd this b%!&#@@$ before.


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A geneticist friend of mine told me that he managed to cross a cow with a chicken. I don't know. That sounds like a cock and bull story to me.


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gran rey de los mono wrote:
A geneticist friend of mine told me that he managed to cross a cow with a chicken. I don't know. That sounds like a cock and bull story to me.

Sounds delicious is what it sounds like.


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A man staggers into the emergency room with a concussion, multiple bruises, and a 5-iron wrapped around his neck. The doctor asks him what happened. The man says "My wife and I were playing a round of golf, when we both sliced hard off the 13th tee and our balls went into the pasture next to the course. We went to search for our balls, and I noticed one of the cows had something white in it's backside. I lifted it's tail, and sure enough, I saw a golf ball with my wife's monogram sticking in it's anus. Then I made a mistake. I turned to my wife, pointed at the cow's ass, and said 'Hey, this looks like yours!'"


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What kind of milk do you get from a forgetful cow? Milk of Amnesia.


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Vidmaster7 wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:
A geneticist friend of mine told me that he managed to cross a cow with a chicken. I don't know. That sounds like a cock and bull story to me.
Sounds delicious is what it sounds like.

It tastes like chicken.


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A blonde was walking in the countryside when she saw a herd of cattle. She saw something that intrigued her, so she went to the farmer who was standing there watching the herd. She pointed and asked "Why doesn't that cow have horns?" The farmer said "Well, cows can hurt each other with their horns, so we usually keep them trimmed down. Also, you can treat calves so their horns don't grow. And some breeds don't really grow horns at all. But to answer your question, that cow doesn't have horns because it's a horse."


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Why did the Secret Service buy a herd of cows for the White House? They wanted to beef up security.


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What do you get if you cross an angry cow with an irate sheep? An animal that's in a baaaad mooood.


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Sharoth wrote:
Vidmaster7 wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:
A geneticist friend of mine told me that he managed to cross a cow with a chicken. I don't know. That sounds like a cock and bull story to me.
Sounds delicious is what it sounds like.
It tastes like chicken.

It could be worse.


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A city guy was driving through the country when his car broke down. He pulled over and was looking at the engine when a cow walked over and leaned over the fence. It looked at the man and said "I think it's your carburetor." The man freaked out and ran to the nearest farmhouse. He pounded on the door until the farmer answered, and then gasped out "A cow just told me how to fix my car!" The farmer looked over towards the field by the man's car and said "Was it a brown cow? Big, with a large white spot by it's left ear?" The man said "Yes! That's the one!" The farmer said "Ahh, that's Daisy. Don't listen to her. She don't know nothin' 'bout cars."


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Sharoth wrote:
Vidmaster7 wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:
A geneticist friend of mine told me that he managed to cross a cow with a chicken. I don't know. That sounds like a cock and bull story to me.
Sounds delicious is what it sounds like.
It tastes like chicken.

Interesting I bet I could tell I have a delicate palate.

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