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Acquisitives

*sniffs slime mold*

NOT THIS. THIS HARAM SLIME MOLD.


*scampers about*

[small]squeak[/small]


The amount of critter posts has increased dramatically.

Acquisitives

*sniffs*

THAT NOT HARAM!

*sucks John the Rat's brain out*


Water you doing you silly bear?


Critter posts always happen when important stuff is going on, eh Vid?


I...uh...guess... so?


What have you two been doing now?!

Sovereign Court

*Sets up a mic stand, clears throat and then makes an announcement.*

Ladies and gentlemen! Due to the influx of critters skulking about, I'm proud to announce that Critter-Fest may once again begin in earnest! So get on out there and fill your bags! Remember, there's no kill limit but you will need to bring your own bags. Now, good luck and happy hunting!


*eats Pulg*

*coughs up hairball*


1 person marked this as a favorite.

*The hairball blinks, stretches, then gets to its... feet? Presumably...*

How invigorating. And what's more, I have emerged from this chrysalis as a beautiful hairy butterfly! Oh, raptures!

Sovereign Court

*Addresses the populace over the microphone.*

Right now folks, Poog is in the lead with a kill count of ten thousand critters and very few are participating. If it helps everyone, the critter population is out of control and needs culling. Also, I'm sorry Bleached Otyugh, but Pulg doesn't count as a critter.


*sulks*

*eats Poog*

*looks expectantly up at the speaker*


Poog definitely counts.

Dark Archive

*gates in Yog-Sothoth*


*Eats Yog-Sothoth*


I'll just be over here rolling my sanity check.


*strokes chin thoughtfully; hands out card*


1 person marked this as a favorite.

I'm going to need about 5 of those cards.

(also don't think I'm not picking up on your racket. one alias creates business for the other!!!)


You're right... it's all lies! Damnable lies!


1 person marked this as a favorite.

I like your hat.


Live, Mr. Spoon-My-Creme!


I don't get it...


Very_Simple_Commoner wrote:
I don't get it...

Used both name and what you said.


Vidmaster7 wrote:
Very_Simple_Commoner wrote:
I don't get it...
Used both name and what you said.

For what now?


MATT DAMON!!!


Sorry Matt you got to go you've been downsized...

Dark Archive

*ritually sacrifices Matt Damon Puppet, thereby gating in Super-Mecha-Quantum-Yog-Sothoth*

Dark Archive

*ritually sacrifices Un-Bear-able Puns, is able to, mostly thanks to prior history of good Elder Credit, eke out 12d12 ⇒ (6, 7, 6, 8, 11, 2, 5, 8, 8, 1, 5, 12) = 79 fiendish flumphs*


Your not the first to want to sacrifice him.

Acquisitives

AM TARDIGRADE! FOUND CRITTER!

*sucks Vidmaster7's brain out, eats his beard like ramen*

Sovereign Court

Ladies and gentlemen, we will now have the mandatory fifty minute break, so count your critters and do whatever you want with them (eat them, sell them, give them to GoatToucher, I don't care). Also, unless you are successful in appealing to the Critter Slayers, you can't kill the other competitors. So, who ever has killed Vidmaster7 and Pulg, please bring them back to life or you will spend five minutes in the penalty zone over there!

*Points to GoatToucher's workroom.*

That's all for now everyone, please do feel free to help yourselves to the banquet that has been prepared and we'll resume later.


You're serving the banquet in GoatToucher's workroom?! Do the words 'food hygiene' mean nothing to you, sir?

Sovereign Court

No, you silly fool! I'm not serving anything anywhere! Although, ironically, food that IS served in GoatToucher's workroom is very good AND incredibly pristine. But clearly, people seem to misunderstand what I said, so to reiterate:

People who misbehave, get sent to GoatToucher's workroom for five minutes.

And the banquet is actually being served by Grandpa Wonderbra at his place!

*Takes a much needed deep breath.*

Alright Pulg, just for that, you're going to spend TEN minutes in GoatToucher's workroom for your impudent cheek!


That punishment is to harsh.


*flies overhead, then swoops down like a ninja and sneak attacks everyone*


Look, my Trusty Vidmaster7, a wild kestrelot appears! I choose YOU!

*Uses the eidolon ball to summon Vidmaster7.

Vidmaster7, use Sarcastic Putdown!


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Count Reiner Heydrich wrote:

No, you silly fool! I'm not serving anything anywhere! Although, ironically, food that IS served in GoatToucher's workroom is very good AND incredibly pristine. But clearly, people seem to misunderstand what I said, so to reiterate:

People who misbehave, get sent to GoatToucher's workroom for five minutes.

And the banquet is actually being served by Grandpa Wonderbra at his place!

*Takes a much needed deep breath.*

Alright Pulg, just for that, you're going to spend TEN minutes in GoatToucher's workroom for your impudent cheek!

My cheeks certainly will be impudent after that...


Sissyl wrote:

Look, my Trusty Vidmaster7, a wild kestrelot appears! I choose YOU!

*Uses the eidolon ball to summon Vidmaster7.

Vidmaster7, use Sarcastic Putdown!

Is that Taunt, Swagger, Torment, or Parting Shot?


1 person marked this as a favorite.

*Vidmaster7 used Jeer*
What is that suppose to be a eagle? looks more like a turkey to me.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pulg wrote:
You're serving the banquet in GoatToucher's workroom?! Do the words 'food hygiene' mean nothing to you, sir?

I'll have you know that my Workroom is scrupulously cleaned and sterilized between each use.

As are many of it's occupants.

Sovereign Court

Exactly! That's what people just don't understand! Why else would I have forced Doktor Verruckte to be in there for such a long time? Because I wanted to appreciate cleanliness!

*Ponders for a moment.*

I wonder what became of that man anyway? Oh well, guess we'll never know!

Sovereign Court

Meant to say that I wanted HIM to appreciate cleanliness.

And yes, I'm far too lazy to edit my posts. Not that my male employees ever say anything when I send at a letter to all of them stating that it's time for the monthly killing, I mean BILLING.


*vidmaster7 used Dig*

Ha try and move me now.


Nonono a ground type move won't work against a kestrelot.

"Vidmaster7, ummm..."

Vid will have to finish the dig attack. Then again, the kestrelot won't have earthquake...

"...keep going, boy!"


Its their turn. can't act out of turn that is against the rules.


*Kestrelot's Pidgetotite is reacting to the Key Stone!*

I don't think you know about this... I guess you could say you had No Guard for it yet. Hurricane please.

explaining the joke:
Mega Pidgeot has the ability No Guard, which causes all attacks to hit. Including when a terget is using dig/fly/bounce/dive/sky drop.


Yeah your way over my head kid.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
GoatToucher wrote:
Pulg wrote:
You're serving the banquet in GoatToucher's workroom?! Do the words 'food hygiene' mean nothing to you, sir?

I'll have you know that my Workroom is scrupulously cleaned and sterilized between each use.

As are many of it's occupants.

H'mm. So that's bleach, then, is it? Coming out of there?


^ that ain't right.

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