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The Earth's axis is tilted 22.5 degrees.

Ooh, a party! I have just the treats.

* looks through recipe cards *

I even have some special treats for our nocturnally-inclined friends. I certainly hope nobody is allergic to dragon's blood.

Pulg's Fairy Accordion Band wrote:

We've got a big gig coming up, fairies - better get practicing!

skwerskwerskwerskwerskwer, skwerskwerskwerskwerskwer, skwerskwerskwerskwer, skwerskwerskwerskwer.

Ahh. Music to my ears.

What is that awful noise?

*hypnotic powers*
I told you to go back to sleep.


She is going to be a problem.

Sovereign Court

And I have the perfect solution! Just remember, now that you are a vampire, all your deepest, darkest desires will now be brought to bare! In other words, you said that you don't like accordion music because you actually love it to a similar extent that GoatToucher does whenever he has a new "plaything" in his workroom.

We've always been of two minds, but until now she was the dominant one.
No more.
Now it is my turn shine in the darkness.

Orcus bids us shine like an impure light,
Like a corpse-fat candle, burning in the night,
In this World of Darkness (tm), we-e-e must shine,
You in your sarcophagus, and I in mine!

i bet ya donna thought I was defeated dinna ye?

I'M not dinner, YOU'RE dinner.

Isn't that right, Vampire Schism?

He doesn't seem that friendly.

Scarab Sages

He plays with his food.

Sovereign Court

Trust you to be the one that knows that!

Scarab Sages

I know that you do, too - once you've got your victims good and mesmerized, you usually make them play Yahtzee! before you drain them.

The clown knows all.

Scarab Sages

Now, now, there's no such thing as a "Know-It-All".

I'm just a Know-It-More.

Knowledge: your closet

Knowledge: Winning.

Knowledge: Charlie sheen

Lack of self-knowledge: Charlie Sheen.

Lack of caring: Charlie Sheen

Scarab Sages

Knowledge (The Planes): Hervé Villechaize

Knowledge: fastest dead horse ever.

Scarab Sages

Would that be the horse Xerxes rode at the Battle of Salamis?

You're not warriors. You're pigs! Toa thonna mondarr! Nocklith! Vohkbar! YOU'RE ALL PIGS! PIGS!'

No wait that wasn't Xerxes that was Queen Bavmorda my bad.

Orcs = warrior pigs (war pigs), surely?

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Genrals gathered in their masses,
Just like witches at black masses
Evil minds that plot destruction,
Sorcerer of death's construction
In the fields the bodies burning,
As the war machine keeps turning
Death and hatred to mankind,
Poisoning their brainwashed minds
Oh Lord yeah

Its the weekend.
Strike up the band.
Time to get my party started.
I know everyone will have a good time.

Scarab Sages

Karaoke hall's THAT-A-WAY!

And we have the perfect moon for the festivities.

Sooo many vampires.

Sovereign Court


If you were a pirate it would be Argh! Blah!

I can do 'ee a blah transplant, should yer condition require it.

Does he have a bad case of lily-liver?

Sovereign Court

You are all weirdos. Ugh!


Sovereign Court

What's wrong with him?

Look what is coming next.




Liberty's Edge

Think about
how most
everyone goes through
yearning only for a life of
only to get sucked into
fighting endless
Punic War sequels for the
old and bitter.
Terrible, isn't it?
All I ever wanted was
to make people laugh.
Ohhhh, noooo, though! That next
Sunday made me shiver, with each new
E-mail I'd deliver.
Evil was at my doorstep; I couldn't take one more
AOL is still around, you know. I
left that cesspit of
losers years ago!

Quite true.

You cannot hope to hoodwink the potato.

Shadow Lodge

*is nodding off*

"Hey, wake up! Didn't you see something before the Slaad posted? Something that isn't there anymore?"

"Wh-what? What happened? Did a point to this thread show up?!?"

"I said I thought I saw something I wasn't *sure* was there *anymore*, I didn't say anything about something I KNEW was NEVER there!"


Sovereign Court

*Appears on the stage.*

And now, ladies and gentlemen, Vidmaster7 shall make his most death defying stunt yet! He will ride his jet powered motorcycle onto a ramp, flying off this very stage and landing safely in the balcony where The Balcony-Seat Hecklers are. Whom, for their own safety, have already been chained up and bolted down to their chairs while they were sleeping.

*A hushed silence descends over the audience.*

And now, ladies and gentlemen, I give you: Vidmaster7!

Airports are just an elaborate QA testing system of the computer systems running the airport.

Shut it down.

*Does the thing*


*Blows a fanfare*

No encores. no encores.

Cars replaced oxen like robochefs replaced fast food workers.

Shut it down.

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