Eye of the Void


Open Call: Design a wondrous item

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RPG Superstar 2011 Top 8 , Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Evil Space Mantis

Eye of the Void
Aura moderate conjuration; CL 9th
Slot none; Price 10,100 gp; Weight ½ lbs.
Description

The eye of the void normally appears to be a small black glass or crystal ball three to four inches in diameter. However, when commanded to open, the eye reveals itself as the terrifying, multi-pupilled eye of some abomination from the dark spaces between the stars.

Once per day, the eye may be held forth and commanded to open as a standard action. The eye’s user may either hold it over their head when commanding the eye to open, and thus affect everyone in a 30 foot radius, or hold the eye out with one hand and instead affect a 30 foot cone. In either case, the eye makes a gaze attack against all creatures caught in the area of effect. Creatures affected by the gaze must make a DC 16 Will save or take 1d6 Wisdom damage and gain the frightened condition for one minute. Creatures in the area of effect which make their saves are instead shaken for one minute. This gaze attack counts as a mind-affecting and fear effect.

Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, lesser planar binding; Cost 5,550 gp


To me this is an example of an item that doesn't follow Sean's advice but overcomes that by sheer force of awesome.

As a DM item, I could use this thing to scare the bejeezus out of my players.

As recovered phat loot, it could become the focus of a plotline (what kind of Horror From The Outer Dark lets its eye just roam around without trying to interfere?), or just flavor for a character being skillfully played.

It has that "more than the item" feeling; imagine producing this bad boy while negotiating with the Orc tribes threatening a village!

Say hello to my little friend!

Keep.

Contributor, RPG Superstar 2009, RPG Superstar Judgernaut

It's got mojo based on the item's theme and description. The mechanics are mostly there, too. Just a few mistakes in presentation (i.e., the cost should be half the price, "30 foot" vs. "30-foot," etc.). I think it uses the wrong spell for the construction requirements, even if the designer's hinting at the notion that you've bound some sort of Cthulu-esque beast from beyond the stars into the thing. It really ought to include doom or the cone-based effect of a fear spell. I'd also prefer to see it only generate its ability as a cone rather than a 360-degree all-around vision kind of thing if held aloft.

Still, it hangs in there enough to at least keep it around for discussion. But, if this one makes it through, I'd consider it to be on the edge for elimination. And the designer's going to have to really ramp things up to compete in further rounds.

Vote to Keep.

Paizo Employee Director of Brand Strategy

A bunch of Lovecraft flavor isn't enough for this one, I'm afraid. I wish it had just a cone effect, and even then it's pretty powerful. Even on a save, you're hosed for a minute, which is longer than most combats last. The stylistic errors Neil mentions and the whole Creation Requirements section seal the deal for me, though. Cost isn't half the price, and lesser planar binding is completely the wrong spell here, as it's a conjuration effect and has nothing to do with fear. If it were priced correctly and an enchantment or necromancy spell I'd be more inclined to keep, but as it is, nope.

Reject.

Contributor

Really cool idea. Cool flavor.

Aura and source spell are wrong (I can see why you'd want to do it that way, but it's wrong).

Cost is wrong, but I can see that as being a simple typo (5,550 instead of 5,050). However, that shows carelessness.

But I think the author could be trained to overcome those sorts of mistakes, and the sheer coolness of the item wants me to see what else they can do.

Keep!

Sovereign Court RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16, 2010 Top 4 aka Alexander MacLeod

someone wrote:

However, when commanded to open, the eye reveals itself as the terrifying, multi-pupilled eye of some abomination from the dark spaces between the stars.

Once per day, the eye may be held forth and commanded to open as a standard action.

I would have combined these two sentences into one rather than saying "commanded" twice in a row. Think it would flow a bit better. As for the area of effect, I like that you can choose, but most things I've seen that switch between radius and cone allow the cone to be longer, say 30 foot radius versus 60 foot cone.

And, necromancy, baby. It's got to be necromancy!

Contributor, RPG Superstar 2010 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9

I’m not a big fan of Leng etc, but I can understand where you are coming from with this. Lots of style, and straightforward focused design make this an easy item to appreciate. For the 30-foot radius version, it really needs the words, ‘except the holder’, in there somewhere. It also needs fear in the requirements, it’s close to a SIAC but that’s fine, as Ryan said sometimes rule #27 overrides the other rules.

You were close to the template format which must have helped with the judges. It’s Slot —; and Weight 1/2 lb.

I can understand why you didn’t expand the radius for the cone version, the range of most gaze attacks is 30 feet.

Welcome to the ranks of RPG Superstar! Keep bringing the powerful mojo, and show us your sophisticated design skills. Best of luck!

Contributor, RPG Superstar 2010 Top 4

I’m with Sean, this is a cool idea.

Like the others, I would have skipped over holding it above your head and affecting everyone in a 360 degree radius; that has only complicated the item for you. The cone is cool, but it felt like you were reaching.

You know what I might have liked? Some nod to the actual universal monster rules regarding gaze attacks (i.e. averting your eyes gives you a 50% chance not to need to make a saving throw, but grants concealment. A blindfolded target requires no saving throw but grants total concealment). You had the word count to spare.

A little comment on language and grammar: “However, when commanded to open, the eye reveals itself as the terrifying, multi-pupilled eye of some abomination from the dark spaces between the stars.” Your use of the word ‘some’ really stuck out at me. I would just tighten the language to “of an abomination”. Alexander’s point about the double use of commanded is also noteworthy.

Congratulations though! You made it to the Top 32! I’ll have my eye on what you do next.

Seriously, work hard. Maybe recruit an extra pair of eyes (pun intended) to look over your entry. Read it out loud to yourself. Do a little research. I only say this because I’d like to see you go far.

(groan, too easy to the point that it’s accidental, sorry kids)

The Exchange RPG Superstar 2011 Top 32 , Star Voter Season 8 aka Sect

Interesting idea to start with, but I'm not a big fan of the item as a whole. Everyone else has pretty much said what I was thinking, though I would like to add that I think it's a bit odd that the cone effect is shorter than the radius effect.

Dedicated Voter Season 6

The best part about this item for me is its power level. It would have been very easy for you to have made this a much higher level item, but you shot it at the lower end, without losing its awesome.

Much lower and I'd have said, "really, that's it?" And much higher would have made the power outshine the activation. Wonderful execution!

Spoiler:
Okay, I lied, its the activation that sells it. The power level is important, but the black orb --> freakish eyes staring at you is absolutely amazing!

Sovereign Court RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8 , Star Voter Season 6

Hmm, this seems more of a DM item than a player item to me. 1d6 wisdom damage doesn’t do much to PCs, and the weilder doesn’t seem to be immune to the burst effect. Also not keen on the spell requirement. The duration is way too long, I feel.

This belongs in the hands of a cthulu cthultist.

Contributor, RPG Superstar 2010 Top 4

Matthew Morris wrote:
Hmm, this seems more of a DM item than a player item to me. 1d6 wisdom damage doesn’t do much to PCs

Drop a cleric's wisdom by 5 to 6 points and they'll be coughing up a fair number of bonus spells. That sucks in the middle of an encounter area.

This would also reduce Will saves for follow-up spells that they owner might start using. Plus if they're frightened, that only compunds it.

It does have issues, but I think you're understating the Wis loss. This item can be nasty in the hands of a spellcaster that favors spells that require Will saves.


I like the first two sentences that give the physical description. However, I'd like to see the word terrifying removed and the description enhanced so that the image of the eye feels terrifying.

I like the item and its effect, but I don't like that it is held in different positions to choose between the two areas of effect. I feel like I should be able to command it to do what without the proper positioning.

Also, I really llke the name.

Star Voter Season 8

Jim Groves wrote:
Matthew Morris wrote:
Hmm, this seems more of a DM item than a player item to me. 1d6 wisdom damage doesn’t do much to PCs

Drop a cleric's wisdom by 5 to 6 points and they'll be coughing up a fair number of bonus spells. That sucks in the middle of an encounter area.

This would also reduce Will saves for follow-up spells that they owner might start using. Plus if they're frightened, that only compunds it.

You don't lose spells to wisdom damage though.

I see this as horribly underpriced though -- its a SIAC fear with a touch of idiocy to everyone that fails the save (touch of idiocy is a penalty not damage, but it also hits three stats not one unlike this effect so I would call that an even wash). Cool imagery though.


I like it, but frightened for a minute is a big PITA for a DM. Only make people run around like butt monkeys for a couple rounds please.

Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 9

I really do like the imagery of this item. In fact, the imagery is so cool I think it totally outshines anything else about the item. It could be awesome enough to be an entire campaign starting point on it's own.

Good work, man.

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 8 , Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Evil Space Mantis

Thanks everyone for the critique, and by the looks of it, hairs-breadth acceptance of my item! It really is quite amazing to get this level of feedback on my little black orb of terror.

It would seem my attempt to shoehorn in a bit of extra flavor by the school/spell requirements may have been a bit too much. I hadn't counted on just how jealous necromancers are of their mastery over all things fear-inducing! :P


Someone above said that a little Lovecraft feel wasn't enough to put this item over, but in my opinion, a LOT of Lovecraft was just enough!

I like this item a lot; I want a Witch (N)PC to use one as a spellcasting focus.


I have to admit; it's the execution of the item that gives it the mojo. Somewhat related, I get the similar feeling when I have chills running down the back of my neck and recoil in fear as if it were the Eye of Sauron suddenly focused its penetrating steely gaze upon me.

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 8 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8 aka John Benbo

Lovecraft is the man, and one of the factors that dream me to Paizo and Pathfinder was there very open embrace of Lovecraft. If I used this item in a campaign, I would love to see a certain percent chance that some Old One sucks the wielder's soul into the item. Now that I think of it, why hasn't Paizo made Dr. Tillinghast's machine from "The Beyond" into an artifact?


I like this item. I believe the radius should be 60-foot and the cone should be 30-foot. It operates like a 360 degree gaze attack. If the user holds the eye out with one hand, his hand is blocking the rear vision, creating a forward cone.

You may wish to set a duration on how long the eye stays open, and whether the eye stays open if the user no longer has possession. It could be very interesting to roll this thing down a crowded street. ;)


Gah! Evil Staring eyey thingy. Begone! you scare the crap out of me!

Seriously, this item has the mojo cranked up all the way to 11.
Normally items like this fail in other areas like unclear rules or similar problems, but with your item thats not the case. everything is nice, concise and shiny.

This is something that probably wouldn't make a big book of items, because its too special, but it is perfect for rpg-superstar. (And perfect for my bbeg, so I'm soo stealing it.)

Great job easily one of my faves.


Ethan Day-Jones wrote:
Eye of the Void

Simple, tasty, and tight. May not be an overdose of gonzo, but it's useful, even if it would require some tweaking (or preparation and forethought) to keep the bearer from being affected. Me likes.


WOW!!! Nice way to bring a touch of Lovecraftian horror to the game. Love, love, love this item. I'm usually, so-so, big deal when it comes to horror type items and such, but this just grabbed me from the get go. I'm definately looking forward to see what you unleash on us in Round 2.

Liberty's Edge

I'm solidly in the camp of those that LOVE this item. I also prefer the conjuration aura and the spell requirement as you wrote them. I don't see why Sean says that's the wrong way to go about this... but of course, he knows this sort of thing way better than I do (obviously), so I guess I'll defer to his judgement there.

See, to my eyes, this is Top 10 stuff. I didn't think I'd ever really see a Lovecraftian item that truly impressed me, but this does.

Anyway, great job! Don't go into the next round thinking that you have to overdo it based on the judges commentary alone. make the people happy, that's all you need to do from here on out! Congrats on making the Top 32.

Dedicated Voter Season 6

Azmahel wrote:
Gah! Evil Staring eyey thingy. Begone! you stare the crap out of me!

Fixed it :)

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2010 Top 8 aka AWizardInDallas

These are my comments before reading the comments of the judges or others:

Unfortunately, I don't care much for this item for several reasons. First, it seems to riff off Spelljammer and beholders. Since there are no official rules for space travel in the Pathfinder RPG this seems like more of a nostalgia item.

Second, this seems more like a monster in glass form and its effects are somewhat disappointing. There are plenty of things in the game that already that cause Wisdom damage. Even though you didn't go with the beholder's antimagic effect, the eye is still very strongly reminiscent of void dwelling beholder-kind. Seeing powers more related to void, vacuum, stars or something of that nature would have been more inventive. Lesser planar binding seems like an odd choice for construction requirements, since outer space not the planes is where the eye comes from. The costing/pricing is iffy.

Overall, this is a weak entry. I'd rather see the monster this came from than the magic item. :(

Grand Lodge

Congratulations!

I like this and want to take it on a Heavens Oracle I am thinking of. :) Interesting to see the love/hate that some people have with it. I certainly fall into the love category.

No new feedback to the critique on requirements, etc. Perhaps a reduced effect on a made save like 1/2 the wisdom damage and only Shaken...

Nicely done!

Contributor

Really nice flavor here, and it almost makes me overlook some of the ways in which this seems a bit powerful and with a bit too long of a duration. Still, I like it based on the spooky almost lovecraftian atmosphere.

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 8 , Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Evil Space Mantis

Richard A. Hunt wrote:
Unfortunately, I don't care much for this item for several reasons. First, it seems to riff off Spelljammer and beholders. Since there are no official rules for space travel in the Pathfinder RPG this seems like more of a nostalgia item.

Interestingly enough, it was entirely inspired by the fluff for Golarion's Dark Tapestry. Well, and maybe a bit by having read some Lovecraft over the years. I never really read any Spelljammer material at all, so if I did manage to steal concepts from that, it was unintentional. Now that you mention it though, the whole 'eye making a magical gaze attack' thing is a bit Beholder-in-a-Can...

Richard A. Hunt wrote:
I'd rather see the monster this came from than the magic item. :(

And this is funny because when I was thinking of interesting mechanics to play with, I thought to myself: What do monsters get to do that PCs don't? And the answer I hit on was ability damage.

I'm not trying to pick a fight with you or anything; you make completely valid points. I just thought it was interesting to see how we managed to perceive the item and its influences differently.

Eric Stelle wrote:
Interesting to see the love/hate that some people have with it.

It's pretty fun to see from my end too :)

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2011 Top 32 aka Bats Kabber

Nicely done Ethan. This thing is creepy cool.

The Exchange Contributor, RPG Superstar 2008 Top 6 , Dedicated Voter Season 6

Your avatar gave me a "HEY! Did Daigle enter after all?" moment :)

Overall I'm a fan. I like the choice of a cone or radius attack. I'd quibble with the use of the term "gaze attack", since that has special meaning that this item doesn't appear to satisfy. I'd instead put in "no effect on creatures who cannot see the eye", or make it a true gaze attack with a duration (i.e. creatures must save on their action). If I went that route, I'd let the wielder make one gaze attack per round as part of the standard action of maintaining use of the device. But this is IMO one of the neater entries in the round.

RPG Superstar 2009 Top 8

Congratulations on making the Top 32!

I like your item, it's simple and direct. I like the description and I like the flavour. I also like the choice between cone and radius but usually, those kinds of decisions have more strategic factors behind them, like one is stronger (higher DC) but the other is larger (gets more targets).

Also, 1 minute is 10 rounds and that is a long time to be frightened. Used by PCs it is going to effectively end an encounter and used against them is really going to mess things up.

Your concept and writing is solid. You got exactly the right image across with your description and rules.

Great Item!

Scarab Sages RPG Superstar 2009 Top 4 , Star Voter Season 6 aka raidou

Ethan, congratulations on your winning entry! Overall I like this item's theme and I see where the judges are coming from in terms of flavor overcoming the basic spell-in-a-can structure. I actually like this item better as a device simulating a gaze attack than a single-shot fear effect. I envision a mad cultist affixing this thing to a staff and walking among new terrified recruits as the Thing from Beyond judges their character and fitness to serve. Best of luck in future rounds!

Liberty's Edge Dedicated Voter Season 6

At first I thought I liked this item. But then I realized that I don’t really care for it.

I do like Lovecraftian stuff, and I love abominations. Just ask my players.

But what I don’t like is magic items that have crappy DC saves. Even magic items that are scaled for high level parties have effects that monsters scaled for the party will save against (even if it is their weak save) 95% of the time. I know this isn’t really a design failing, as you are limited by the caster level of the item to create the save.

But my real beef is that unlike the judges, I don’t agree that the mojo overcomes the glitches in the item.

Star Voter Season 6

Congrats! This item rocks and I'll be looking for your stuff next round.

Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9

Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Maps, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

Congratulations on being a superstar!

Ewww, nasty and evocative - I really like this.

I only had one concern. though for this one it was in the decription and it was to do with the radius use.

Since the radius use would include the user (unlike the cone effect), would the user be subject to the gaze attacks as well as the user would effectively be in the area of effect?

The only other thing I noticed - the Price is usually double the cost on most items, so I expected either the cost to be 5050 or the price to be 11,100 but whats a grand difference to a rich adventurer with money to burn.

Scoring:

Note to all participants: The final score is a factor into who I vote for, but so is how much I like an item (my personal preferences and tastes). So dont assume I am voting for my highest scoring items only.

Name: 7/10
Not as original as I would have liked, so I shaved a few off here.

Description: 9/10
Very nice presentation, fairly tight rules even though I found one question on the radius area of effect.

Construction: 8/10
I just wasnt sure about the price/cost relationship which cost a couple of points. Yeah, I'm being mean.

Final score: 24/30 - good item, good score.

I hope the feedback is useful.

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2011 Top 32 , Star Voter Season 6

Things between the stars leaving their eyes around really sells this item. The fear for a minute for only 10000 gp is way powerful, but with just a tweak it could be modified to sliding scale. I like it. I just wish it would stop staring at me.

Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9

Congratulations Ethan!
Strength (Overall): 14
Dexterity (see time in my campaign): 12
Constitution (long-time keeper): 12
Intelligence (mechanics): 12
Wisdom (writing craft): 14
Charisma (flavor/visuals): 14

Grants a gaze attack is a nice play. I think the time of affected creatures is steep. Unless of course the user also fails the save. and the multi-pupilled eye is a great image to stick me with :)
My apologies for being such a slow reader and not getting you feedback sooner. Again, congratulations! :)

Star Voter Season 6

This was my favorite item out of the top 32, not so much for what it does as that the source of the fear effect is so cool!

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 16 , Star Voter Season 6 aka Shadow-Mask

I like two things about this item. First, you can choose radius or cone, whichever is most useful/appropriate. Second, the description is just eerie. I'm not one for the horror factor in my books, movies, or what-have-you; this I like.

I'm not particularly keen on the Wis damage, and a minute is a really long time. As a player, I'd be more than a little perturbed if I was out of the action for that long. As a GM, this baby can kill my encounter, no questions asked.

In a nutshell, this item is not necessarily something I'd use, but it's cool all the same. Some of the adjustments mentioned above would help with the management of it in game.

I anticipate an interesting archetype, and look forward to seeing it.

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 8 aka The Leaping Gnome

I agree with what a lot of people are saying about the mechanical issues with this item but I like the overall idea of what this should do.

However, if you were going for an Eye of Sauron/Lovecraftian feel for this item, I'd have like to have seen this be a much higher level item (like worth 30,000gp, with appropriately awesome abilities) or even an artifact (of course, that would probably have disqualified you).

Also, you didn't specify that the person who activates this item is immune to the effect. I kind of like the thought of this orb o' terror not playing favorites. You mess with the minotaur you get the gore attack as it were.

Good luck round two.


Ethan Day-Jones wrote:

Eye of the Void

Aura moderate conjuration; CL 9th
Slot none; Price 10,100 gp; Weight ½ lbs.
Description

The eye of the void normally appears to be a small black glass or crystal ball three to four inches in diameter. However, when commanded to open, the eye reveals itself as the terrifying, multi-pupilled eye of some abomination from the dark spaces between the stars.

Once per day, the eye may be held forth and commanded to open as a standard action. The eye’s user may either hold it over their head when commanding the eye to open, and thus affect everyone in a 30 foot radius, or hold the eye out with one hand and instead affect a 30 foot cone. In either case, the eye makes a gaze attack against all creatures caught in the area of effect. Creatures affected by the gaze must make a DC 16 Will save or take 1d6 Wisdom damage and gain the frightened condition for one minute. Creatures in the area of effect which make their saves are instead shaken for one minute. This gaze attack counts as a mind-affecting and fear effect.

Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, lesser planar binding; Cost 5,550 gp

Disclaimer:

Ask A RPGSuperstar Succubus is posting from the point of view of a CE aligned succubus – fairness is an adjective applicable to hair coloration, balance is what a couple of mortals on opposite ends of a plank pivoted on a rocky spire above a drop of several hundred feet into a pool of molten basalt frantically try to do, and logic is something which proves anything a demon of adequate status and charm requires it to demonstrate.

Is the item Pretty?
No.

Does the item help a demonic seductress to keep a paladin house pet?
Ahhh, yes, some potential if he or she is a paladin of very little experience. Succubus to troublesome paladin: 'Are you asking me to get the eye of the void out to show to you?'...

Is the item otherwise useful?
No.

Other Comments? (including World Domination potential on the evil laughter scale, where appropriate)
Random thought:
I wonder... If you made a super-large version of a wayfinder and inserted one of these into it, what would be the result?
<wanders off>
<returns after some time covered in ichor and smoke>
Well, yes, that was interesting. Quite a piercing scream, too. Oh well, that's what incubi are there for - to carry out dangerous experiments involving other planar entities suddenly looking up at you from the needle of a wayfinder. That's the first time in a while I've seen someone explode with fear as a wayfinder blows apart in a shower of molten metal.
House-training paladins and amusing experiments aside, I'm not sure that this is very useful to a succubus. What's the point in holding up an item which terrorises people? Sure, sapping a mortal's will to resist is always handy, but if they're busy running away in terror it's a bit hard to use your charms on them. I mean you have to have them chained to the walls of a dungeon first so that they can't run away...
<brightens up slightly>

Gollum Rating:
Fisssh.

Contributor, RPG Superstar 2010 Top 16, 2011 Top 32, 2012 Top 4

What a fun item to bring with you when you need to crash the headquarters of an evil cult! I can just see a room full of evil clerics freaking out as they each suddenly lose 1d6 Wisdom - and the bonus spells/DCs that go along with those precious points. Ouch! Take that, Evil! Of course, the GM in me wants to spring this on the cleric in my current campaign. ;-)

I love the evocative, Lovecraftian flavor you've dialed up here. In fact, it's Lovecraftian without actually blurting it out which is a nice touch. Kudos for a very creepy wondrous item. This one is one of my favorites.

Best of luck going forward!

Contributor, RPG Superstar 2010 Top 16, 2011 Top 32, 2012 Top 4

Urizen wrote:
I get the similar feeling when I have chills running down the back of my neck and recoil in fear as if it were the Eye of Sauron suddenly focused its penetrating steely gaze upon me.

Yes! I had the same imagery at first. Very cool.

Star Voter Season 8

Tom Phillips wrote:
What a fun item to bring with you when you need to crash the headquarters of an evil cult! I can just see a room full of evil clerics freaking out as they each suddenly lose 1d6 Wisdom - and the bonus spells/DCs that go along with those precious points. Ouch!

Again that isn't quite how wisdom damage works. You don't lose bonus spells any more (the DCs will go down though).

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 8 , Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Evil Space Mantis

Tom Phillips wrote:
Best of luck going forward!

Thanks! Good luck to you as well. Only 23 hours til the voting opens...


Ethan Day-Jones wrote:
Eye of the Void

I struggled with my thoughts on this one.

Any reference to a Cthulu-esque creature, IMHO, has no place in Pathfinder. It just simply isn't a proper fantasy reference. That said, it could simply have said "some abomination from the dark of night," and I wouldn't have even thought about that.

I see some gramatical errors and some language that doesn't match normal magical item format, but those are superficial. It makes me question the standard for RPG Superstar, but it's not a big deal in my mind.

What is a big deal to me, though, is the number of other errors I "think" I have found. Maybe I'm just doing my math wrong, or mis-understand the rules, but here are my points:

1) It's not very unique. A magical eye that causes fear. Strikes me as a something taken off a certain monster we used to see.

2) It seems very powerful for what it is. If everyone is "shaken for one minute" even if they save, it is extraordinarily powerul. That's more than 1 round/level (at 9th level).

3) Planar Binding, Lesser just doesn't make any sense for the description of the item nor does it explain the abilities it has. If the item described capturing the soul of the creature and the creature had a fear ability, that would make sense. But, it doesn't say that.

4) It's price looks wrong to me:
A 5th level spell, cast at 9th level= (5x9x2000)
1 charge per day = divide by 5 (5/1=5)
NONE slot= x2
The cost should be: 9x5x2,000= 90,000 / 5 (1/day): 18,000x2=36,000
36,000 gp (18,000 to create)

Please correct me if I am wrong here.
I thought price was VERY important.

5) It's save DC is wrong:
A 5th level spell requires an attribute of 15, which grants a +2.
10+5+2=17
Of course, that's assuming "lesser planar binding" is somehow producing the effect.
I'm pretty sure I'm correct about that.

Personally, I'm surprised this one made it to RPG Superstar.

I'm sorry. I can't love everything :)

Ken

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 16 , Star Voter Season 6

I love this! If Cthulhu mythos stuff has no place in pathfinder, there would be no skum, no aboleth, no monsters with tentacles, and no things which make you crazy. Lovecraft is my greatest creative influence, and this hits the right cord. It has just enough of the starborn horror, while still preserving the mystery of lovecraftian evil. Flavour-wise it's perfect. I do agree with the requirements needing some manner of fear spell. I also think the radius effect should be smaller than the cone effect. Sure the radius risks hitting your allies and might be less desirable than the cone in many cases, but it essentially hits four times as many squares, which is an issue for me. I would make the cone 60ft and the radius 30.

I would use this, all of the time!

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