>>Ask *James Jacobs* ALL your Questions Here!<<


Off-Topic Discussions

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Grand Lodge

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Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Card Game Subscriber; Pathfinder Comics Subscriber

Bah. Only James Jacob can answer my earthshaking questions.


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Dear Ask A Sho-, er, James Jacob:


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Campaign Setting, Modules, Tales Subscriber; Pathfinder Comics Subscriber

Dear James Jacobs, why can't Swedish soccer teams seem to qualify for the Champions League any longer?


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

If you had a million dollars what would you buy?


White, wheat, or raisin, hon?

snaps gum

Liberty's Edge

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Treppa wrote:

White, wheat, or raisin, hon?

snaps gum

Qarter cheez plate, scattered-smothered-covered, pull one cheese steak, drop two eggs


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

How many licks does it take to get the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?

3 is not the right answer.

Liberty's Edge

Dear JJ:

Waffles? Or Pancakes?

Liberty's Edge

Cats or dogs?

The Exchange

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Dear JJ:

"How much wood, would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris?"


What happens if a manticore and a human female get that special feeling for each other?

Dark Archive

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Sir, the possibility of James Jacobs successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3720 to 1!


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Handy for a Tenner?

The Exchange

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JJ: Light - particle or wave?

Paizo Employee Creative Director

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Mairkurion Jr. wrote:

Dear JJ:

** spoiler omitted **

The sky is probably blue because of something you did. ;-P

Paizo Employee Creative Director

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Kajehase wrote:
Dear James Jacobs, why can't Swedish soccer teams seem to qualify for the Champions League any longer?

It's all part of their 19 year plan of making other teams overconfident so that when the time is right they'll be able to strike with unwavering power and vim.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

4 people marked this as a favorite.
Studpuffin wrote:
Can you identify the source of >>THIS<< Smell? Your screen is scratch and sniff right?

It's tough, but I suspect it's probably lotus pollen harvested from the southernmost slopes of Mount Voormithadreth just before the fourth uprising of the weeping dead.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

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JMD031 wrote:
If you had a million dollars what would you buy?

One sixth of Steve Austin. Then I'd Ebay that back to him for a profit.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

Treppa wrote:

White, wheat, or raisin, hon?

snaps gum

Wheat.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

5 people marked this as a favorite.
JMD031 wrote:

How many licks does it take to get the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?

3 is not the right answer.

Not enough information. Human tongue or froghemoth tongue?

Paizo Employee Creative Director

5 people marked this as a favorite.
Jeremiziah wrote:

Dear JJ:

Waffles? Or Pancakes?

Pancakes. Waffles vex me by capturing the butter and creating an uneven spread of dairy product across the surface.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

18 people marked this as a favorite.
Studpuffin wrote:
Cats or dogs?

Cats.

Cats bury their feces. Dogs eat it.

Cats all the way.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

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Crimson Jester wrote:
** spoiler omitted **

If a woodchuck could Chuck Norris, he'd be the star of the Internet. He's not, so the answer is obviously zero. (BUT! That's a METRIC zero, so you have to convert.)

RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32

Is there anything that cannot be blamed on Cosmo?

Contributor

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Billie Piper?

Paizo Employee Creative Director

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Crimson Jester wrote:
What do you call a halfling that mates with a human?

Stretch.

Crimson Jester wrote:
What about a gnome?

Reverse jailbait.

Crimson Jester wrote:
Are there Dwelfs in Golarion?

Nope. Elves are too awesome and dwarves too drunk to ever get together.

Crimson Jester wrote:
Muls?

There were once upon a time, but then Litigiouthrax, demon lord of Intellectual Property, brought them all back home to Athas.

Crimson Jester wrote:
If a human can mate with an Orc and an Elf can a player play a half human 1/4 Elf or 1/4 Orc??

If you're talking about a huorlf, then yes.

If you're talking about an ormulf, then no.
If you're talking about an elorman, then yes... but only if you send me the pictures.


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James Jacobs wrote:
Studpuffin wrote:
Cats or dogs?

Cats.

Cats bury their feces. Dogs eat it.

Cats all the way.

I am impressed with the wisdom handed down at such a late hour, I am disappointed that you are a cat person

Paizo Employee Creative Director

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Crimson Jester wrote:

wHY HELIOCENTRIC?

wHY NOT the turtle of enormous girth upon which its shell it holds the earth??

Because the turtles below that guy asked us not to. They're kind of annoyed the top dude gets all the press, and we empathize with them. Just because it's turtles all the way down doesn't mean the dude on top should be the star.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

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Mairkurion Jr. wrote:
What happens if a manticore and a human female get that special feeling for each other?

The manticore puts its tail (CENSORED) but only twice per hour.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Cosmo3PO wrote:
Sir, the possibility of James Jacobs successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3720 to 1!

But there's only a 423 in 29 chance of that.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

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Goblin King Grog wrote:
Handy for a Tenner?

Speak common, you silly goblin!

Dark Archive

when shall we see the were-rex?

Paizo Employee Creative Director

brock wrote:
JJ: Light - particle or wave?

Particle. Waves are made of WATER, not light.

Sheesh. (rolls eyes)

Paizo Employee Creative Director

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The smitter wrote:
I am impressed with the wisdom handed down at such a late hour, I am disappointed that you are a cat person

I forgive you. (Pets the cat.)

Dark Archive

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

What do the numbers 12, 24, 35, 85, 89, 92, 95, 98, 134, 139 and possibly 112 have in common?

Paizo Employee Creative Director

ulgulanoth wrote:
when shall we see the were-rex?

Already taken care of. Click here for revelation.

Paizo Employee Creative Director

5 people marked this as a favorite.
Yours is mined wrote:
What do the numbers 12, 24, 35, 85, 89, 92, 95, 98, 134, 139 and possibly 112 have in common?

They all appear in your question.

Come ON folks! Ask me some HARD questions!

Liberty's Edge

Pathfinder Adventure Path, Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

What is best in life?

The Exchange

At which point does a circle begin?


Dear James Jacobs,

I like doing magic and stabbing people, but I am rubbish at performing and am not in any respect wise. What should I do with my life? Is there a full spell progression in my future?

Regards,
Gary


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Campaign Setting, Modules, Tales Subscriber; Pathfinder Comics Subscriber

Who

Spoiler:
shot Olof Palme?

Where

Spoiler:
is Lord Lucan?

Spoiler:
And are those matters related?


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James Jacobs wrote:
Studpuffin wrote:
Cats or dogs?

Cats.

Cats bury their feces. Dogs eat it.

Cats all the way.

FAIL

You have conveniently forgotten several pertinent fcts:

Cats may not eat feces, but regurgitate many things, including wildlife, on floors. Especially in hallways used at O-dark-30.

Cats bury their feces, and tend to do it in incovenient areas, like a certain troll's vegetable garden.

Dogs are obviously a superior choice for an animal companion.


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

Is the Simpsons still funny?

Do you miss me?


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
James Jacobs wrote:
JMD031 wrote:

How many licks does it take to get the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?

3 is not the right answer.

Not enough information. Human tongue or froghemoth tongue?

I'll take either answer. And please hurry, the situation is growing dire.


Spank Trollham wrote:
James Jacobs wrote:
Studpuffin wrote:
Cats or dogs?

Cats.

Cats bury their feces. Dogs eat it.

Cats all the way.

FAIL

You have conveniently forgotten several pertinent fcts:

Cats may not eat feces, but regurgitate many things, including wildlife, on floors. Especially in hallways used at O-dark-30.

Cats bury their feces, and tend to do it in incovenient areas, like a certain troll's vegetable garden.

Dogs are obviously a superior choice for animal consumption.

FTFY {harfs up hairball in Spank's best dress shoes}

And don't blame me for you being so aggressive.


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Campaign Setting, Companion, Modules, Roleplaying Game Subscriber

James, as some one who is pro psionics as they are written now, why is it the more I read of the psionic threads the more I think you should just rewrite the rules completely different to annoy all the pro psionics people?

Grand Lodge

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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Roleplaying Guild Subscriber

Tastes good or less filling?


All hail the great James Jacobs! May his wisdom shine down on thee!

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