The Next Poster...


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BBBBBbbbbbbbbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

The next poster will help blood sample gestate clones of Mr. Nordberg.

Scarab Sages

This is our last known footage of Nordberg in action. It should help you get some blood samples....

The next poster has had an epiphany.


Dear Lord! It's real!

The next poster has discovered a new sensation.


And it gives me endless elation~! And sore wrists, but that's what I get for staying up all night to play video games.

The next poster has read an old treatise concerning one of their favorite subjects.

Scarab Sages

Principia Discordia. If you need Chaos explained to you verbally, there might be no helping you - but this is still a pretty good book!

The next poster discovered an old, abandoned idea they think is pretty neat, and now wants to inflict it on contemporary minds.


Heeeeey, guys, anyone want to participate in Lupercalia? It's coming up soon and we should all go stripping through the city and slapping everyone willy-nilly.

The next poster has intriguing ideas of what to do on Groundhog's Day.


I think we should spend it in near-earth orbit while watching the movie with the same name (with Bill Murray in it), and listening to the "My Little Pony" sountrack performed by the Red Army choirs.

Sadly no one else seems to think this a good idea. Ho well.

The next poster has had a revelation about Brussels sprouts.

Scarab Sages

That's not actually spinach Popeye's eating - that's a shameless lie to make the sponsors happy - his strength comes from Brussels sprouts! Don't you see??? How did you think Jean Claude "the Muscles from Brussels" Van Damme got that way?

The next poster will predict whom Time Magazine's next 4 People of the Year and explain how their nominees earned the award.


They kissed a lot of @$$ and craddled round sphereical objects in their hands. I'll leave thatto your imagination.

The Next poster had better identify three geometric figures as his life depends on it.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

Euclid, Archimedes, and Descartes now you can put your d20 away there is no need to roll initiative.

The next poster Thinks, but the are not.


Such is the case with existentially-challenged tanukis, it appears.

The next poster knows a secret related to the number 5.

Scarab Sages

Paizo Superscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Starfinder Charter Superscriber

The Perfect Prime.

The next poster has another opinion.


No, I most certainly do not!

The next poster has a complaint.


Everybody wants a piece of me ! That's the burden of gnomish greatness !

The next poster knows a nice recipe.

Scarab Sages

Bailey's + butterscotch schnapps + Goldschlager + Jagermeister (optional, in my book) = the "Oatmeal Cookie" cocktail. It actually tastes like an oatmeal cookie. Sorcery, I tell you!

The next poster has something to say to The Balcony-Seat Hecklers.


"Who are you ?"

Yeah... I know: I'm lazy as Hell for not having googled those terms.

What can I say: I'm a lazy ebil gnome !

The next poster is not lazy !


So many Yous to Get, so little time...*GRAB*

The next poster thinks they have found somewhere they can hide. They are WRONG.

Silver Crusade

But...my chest high wall!!!

The next poster won a game of basketball against Batman and Michael Jordan.


I worked damn' hard to get all their balls in that ba... what?

Well, yes, clearly your rules are very different to mine. YMMV.

The next poster has broken the mould!

Silver Crusade

By court order.

The next poster knocked a screw loose.


And pretty much the whole furniture set in the process, it seems.

The next poster knows what that plate under your coffee cup is actually for.


It's a parabolic antenna destined to receive the transmission from an alien 5 dimensional intelligence orbiting around Venus, and to amplify this transmission so you can immerse yourself in it while you sip your morning coffee.

Also, remember: the Roman Empire never died.

The next poster will huff and puff.

Silver Crusade

And...call my wrecking crew.

The next poster found their porpoise.


Turns out it was under a bridge.

The next poster has left his life to chance.

Grand Lodge

...but what happens in the confines of the walls of Vegas stays in the confines of the walls of Vegas.

The next poster needs to sincerely apologize for their actions at last year's Christmas party, video taping all of that with their left hand took talent.


How was I supposed to know you two were going to... Sorry, forgot you paid me to keep quiet.

The next poster like to swim in the Volga River in the winter.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

I like to hunt for fish.

The next poster is a fish out of water, in a small pond.

Scarab Sages

That describes me so well it's not even funny.

The next poster will say something that must be said, yet no one seems willing to say.


You all should go out and interact like normal humans instead of sitting around rolling dice and pretending to be cooler than you actually are.

The next poster is cold-hearted.


You're no better than we are, Rashly5.

Hehehe ! Hrrrr ! Ngggggg !

Yes, I'm a cold-hearted gnome !

The next poster made a momentous archeological discovery.


At last! Proof that the Turin Shroud is GENUINE, and available in six exciting colours! (teal, puce, ecru, burnt sienna, turquoise and marzipan) One size fits all. Do not dry clean.

The next poster is full of the milk of human kindness.


Quite ridiculously easy to steal as long as you look appropriately adorable.

The next poste knows where to find an artifact of great power.

Scarab Sages

You ever see footage of the President of the United States and notice there's always one guy with a briefcase nearby? That's the Man With The Football. The briefcase contains the launch codes.

The next poster sees "normal humans" for what they truly are.


Servants who were made to take care of cats till the end of time.

The next poster agrees with this.

Silver Crusade

*Yes Yes Yes You Out There Go Get Koko And New Cat Friend Dinner Now Hurry*

*Give New Face Now Want Set Green Paper On Fire*

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

Not since the Sixty's....man.

The next poster is high on life.


Amongst other things.

The next poster has a trophy for exactly what you'd expected.

Silver Crusade

*Koko Wins Gold Toy In Spelling Bee*

*Give New Face Now Wear Mask To Bark Mad At Big Green Paper Eaters*


We gnomes invented greed. But the humans have depreciated it !

The next poster is not a fan of ice creams.

Scarab Sages

Ice cream being a sort of gelatinous substance that comes in tubs, the term "ice creams" is a needless grammatical error, similar to how one ought to say "less ice cream" and not "fewer ice cream."

The next poster had a three-way with the Super Mario Brothers.


It was a party.

The next poster can inflict the inhumane torture that is named politics.

Scarab Sages

It doesn't have to be.

The next poster sees a conspiracy behind Sonny Bono's death.


The Venusians Against Mustaches finally got him !

His hit song "Bang Bang" clearly alludes at his fear of death at the hands (or should I say "tentacles" ?) of these violent, facial hair hating, three-eyed radicals.

The next poster knows about the next Kool-Aid.


YEAAAAAAAAAAAAH.

I don't know what the next poster was expecting.


What are you doing knocking at my door, Karln Wibbletron ? Stay outside, by all means !

The next poster is a fan of halflings.

The Exchange

I prefer them skewered a la' shish-ka-bobs, sandwiched between onions and mushrooms. A nice Halfling stew with peas and carrots for a nice homey flavor like mom used to make brings back memories is also appreciated.

The next poster discussed the distinction of Halflings vs Hobbits vs Pecks.


Pecks are what chickens, pigeons, and other birds do when there beaks strike the ground.

Hobbits and Halfling are the ewnd result of intellectual properties and legal copyright.

The Next Poster will build love nest for Valentine's Day.


Love makes great nesting material.

The next poster has something stuck somewhere it shouldn't be.


Pull it out! Pull it out!

The next doctor had better be a proctologist.


With my tentacles, I can give a mean rectal exam.

The next poster wanted to sue for malpractice, but there was no evidence.

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