The Next Poster...


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Here's $3.99. Go down the ARC and buy a comic book.

The next poster has my secret box of dnner recipes and will surprise me when he makes or she makes my dinner.

Silver Crusade

*Apple Peanut Butter Candy Drink Here Put In Dinosaur Tooth*

*Give New Face Now Red Mad Toilet At Mean Secret Eyeball Men Love Snowman That Ran Away To Cold Place*

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

"Smile and nod boys, smile and nod."

The next poster is a bizarre sort of commando.


Um right, bizarre? I've conquered 80% of the earth, except for New Zealand. I use any confiscated weapon I can obtain through S.H.I.E.L.D., warehouse 13, the X-Files, TARDIS, and Indiana Jones.

The next poster will discuss the necessities of warp travel.

Dark Archive

Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path Subscriber

How else will I get to meet a Vulcan.

The following poster will tell me what is best in life.


An endless supply of wealth and a double-headed battle axe. Oh, Conan was wrong by the way.

The next poster will explain the benefits maintaining a clean cemetary.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

Much easier to loot.

The next poster is a tomb robber, but not for the reasons we all think.

The Exchange

These make excellent granite and marble countertops.

The next robber, er, poster knows which pantheon Crom belongs to.


He's obviously part of the Periodic Pantheon, alongside such greats as Hydrogn, god of flame and explosions, Clorine, goddess of nausea and poison, Carbn, goddess of life, and Gold, goddess of wealth.

The next poster will tell us of a trip he/she had to Shadizar.


It's worth the 2,000 sum gold pieces I spent throught the travel agency.

The next poster will tell us how the weather fares in his homeland. I have other places to go and experience.


Cold and windy. That's what you get in the high mountains in fall/winter.

The next poster has dealt successfully with the latest dilemma.


Am I Audrey Hepburn dreaming she was a gorilla or a gorilla dreaming it was Audrey Hepburn? The answer: industrial cleaning products are not suitable for human consumption.

The next poster wants to tell us what the Abyss saw when it gazed back at him/her.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

Perfection!

The next poster is not as shiny.


Damn straight! Gloomy and black like Hades.

The next poster will want a ride in my boat.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

As long as it's a boat and not a ship, never mix them up.

The next poster is a wanna be pirate on the river Styxx

The Exchange

Sounds lovely. I just love to gently trail my fingers in the water, watching the ripples fade away.

The next poster will offer to let me cut ahead in line for a small fee.


$1,000,000 dolars sounds good enough.

The next poster will help me with tax deductions and legal fees.


Okay: Get yourself a hidey-hole in the forest somewhere, dig a hole, have what you need for as long as you can in there, and make sure nobody finds you. Eventually, you will run out of food and stuff, but until then: No taxes! Or, at least no taxes you will pay. And legal fees? Nah, you get this for free.

The next poster has a unique addiction.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

Gymnophobic Porn.

The next poster left their clothes in an unusual place.

Silver Crusade

*Koko Love Playing Princess*

*Give New Face Now Koko Say You And You Now Lips And Foot You Kiss Now On Happy Day*


Um, right Koko.

The next poster shall share their favorite recipe.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

Kraft Mac n Cheese, prepare according to the box. Add a can of Cream of Mushroom Soup and a can of Tuna (in water) drain the water. Heat for about ten min. EAT!

The next poster beholds the power of cheese.

Scarab Sages

My gods...it's full of maggots....

The next poster got to meet Koko The Gorilla in person!

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

The encounter was, well let's just say it was stimulating.

The next poster is going to take that the wrong way, but not they way we all think.


I studied for years with a primatologist. I know just how wrong encounters with a gorilla can go. At least Koko isn't a silverback!

The next poster realizes that adding chopped green chiles to the mac-n-cheese makes it even better.


Man, that's spicy!

The next poster describes the contents of the Parthenon, cira 400 B.C.

A link has been provided for easy reference.


Pathfinder Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

I don't need a reference cause I was there! How rude! Just for that I'll leave you all guessing. Which sucks for you guys cause it was pretty cool.

The next poster is going to do a mime impersonation for us.


"I'M IN A BOX! AN INVISIBLE GLASS BOX! I CAN'T GET OUT OF THIS INVISIBLE GLASS BOX I'M IN! HERE I AM, IN THE BOX! ME! NOT SPEAKING! TRAPPED IN A BOX!"

The next poster met a pieman going to the fair.


ROAAHHHR*

RRROOOOOAAAAHHHHHRRRRR**

*He was tasty

**The next poster wants to join the circus.


Roars loudly

I was promised under contract a show in Las Vegas instead I get a zoo in the middle of Utah.

The next poster had better come up with something better or I'm going to step on him.


*Scans through files very quickly* We just had a cancellation at the Circus Noctis on Cassavar III. Here's the contract, just a thumbprint and a retinal scan....Great! The next FTL connection is at Dock 9 on Mareotis Station. You can catch it if you hurry.

The next poster knew him when.

Scarab Sages

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Ah yes, the great Korean philosopher Him When. I remember the exchange that occurred when a Christian missionary attempted to challenge him:

Missionary: Great Him When, what's a good rule to live by?

HW: Moderation In All Things.

Missionary: *arrogant smile* Even love?

HW: *condescending sneer* Even in living by rules, smartass.

The next poster worships a pantheon of obscure computer/video game characters.


Cobra!

The Next Poster confesses his undying love for Skyrim and the Dragon Tongue.


Available as a perk once Dirty Helga has reached rank 75 on the [redacted] skill tree

The next poster saw first hand the effect of the RO SHAM BAU
Shout on Alduin


And they say Blaxploitation is a dead genre!

The next poster just found an otyugh in their apartment.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

He said he would be out by the weekend and is refusing to pay extra rent. On top of that he tracked mud on my freshly steam cleaned white shag rug.

The next poster knows what the white shag rug really is.


Yup. It's NO skin off my back, that for sure.

The next poster has contracted lycanthropy and turns into a weretiger every 28 days.


Actually, in my case it's Panthera uncia gynepardaea. Feline kinda furry right now, in fact....

The next poster notices large paw prints in the back yard!


My flower garden! How am I suppossed to make honey this spring?

The next poster will explain where my gardening tools went.

Scarab Sages

They're in this man's shed - one of them, anyways....

The next poster is being relentlessly stalked by the moon...of another planet!


It appears to be the Moon of Alabama (which I think qualifies). Now I must have whisky or I'll die.

The next poster has just signed up with Outer Spaceways Incorporated.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

Just signed up, we put that
album
out in the 60's man....I played the Cow Bell.

The next poster wants more of something else.


Drops Christmas ads aroud the thread

The next poster wants to buy something but is unsure of the discount.

Scarab Sages

"We Take Off An Arm And A Leg"? I'm not sure if that's really good or really bad...but I guess that's what I get for shopping at that illithid black market from Neverwinter Nights 2: Storm of Zehir.

The next poster spins us right 'round, like a record baby, 'round, 'round, 'round, 'round....

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

....round the mulberry bush, POP goes the dire weasel.

The next poster knows a better twisted rhyme.

Scarab Sages

"There once was a guy from Havana,
screwed a girl on a player piano,
at the height of their fever,
her ass hit the lever,
and yes, he has no banana."

Full discloure: Not my bit, it was a comment I read on THIS YouTube video years ago...which, sadly and ironically, appears to have lost any and all comments since then.

The next poster goes trolling on the stormfront.org messageboards.


And I have done so, though none can see my posts there!!

The next poster will sing me a song about his or her people!!


We're men, we're men in tights.
We roam around the forest looking for fights.
We're men, we're men in tights.
We rob from the rich and give to the poor, that's right!
We may look like sissies, but watch what you say or else we'll put out your lights!
We're men, we're men in tights,
Always on guard defending the people's rights.

[Dance number, chorus line style]

We're men, MANLY men, we're men in tights. Yeah!
We roam around the forest looking for fights.
We're men, we're men in tights.
We rob from the rich and give to the poor, that's right!
We may look like pansies, but don't get us wrong or else we'll put out your lights.
We're men, we're men in tights (TIGHT tights),
Always on guard defending the people's rights.
When you're in a fix just call for the men in tights!
We're butch.

The next poster will know how to fold the laundry and do the dishes, or else.

The Exchange

Them chores ain't gonna do themselves... The or else is the mountain of laundry that'll come crashing down after the cats have covered it with fur. The or else is the roachbait of mold-encrusted dishes tempting you with Botulism-flavored left-overs.

The next poster is a Brony fan boy searching for a DM willing to put in a Golarion equivalent. *Hoof*Bump!

Scarab Sages

He couldn't make it...he's busy playing this, which already exists.

The next poster will make Us a nice, BIIIIIIIG Katamari this time - 10 meters in diameter, at least!

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