The Next Poster...

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Liberty's Edge

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I Live in Your Basement!
Calling All Creeps!
Welcome to Dead House
Don't Go to Sleep!

Pure poetry!

The next poster lives in my basement...

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It didn't start out that way! Having the earth swallow my apartment building up to the the floor above me, and then living the next next floor up is cheating!

The next poster found an obscure ruling that exonerates Elisa from being labeled a cheater in this regard.

Use of spells to achieve victory, no matter how meager or self-serving, is allowable. Thank you.

The next poster utilizes this rule - To much.

Dark Archive

Not just victory. You can achieve whatever you want with the right spells. Power? Gold? Love? You could say that's the easy path but if it was every single peasant would be using magic. I've studied magic since I was a child and my magic is my privilege. I'm not afraid of taking advantage of it.

The next poster doesn't need magic to achieve his goals.



That guy said he only had garbage, so I looted him. He should be happy to be relieved of that "garbage". He is not.

The next poster has a funny use for his Mirror of Opposition.

I used it to clone my twin friends and convince them that his brother was trying to kill them. It was hilarious! They ended all dead but it was worth it!

The next poster is a deadly prankster too.

Scarab Sages

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Here, have a churro! *hands Elise a live stick of dynamite that's been deep-fried and coated in cinnamon and sugar*


The next poster once wore Sissyl's hat for a day, and will tell us about the experience.

Not good! Not good at all! Someone had replaced her hat for a mimic and I didn't notice! IT TRIED TO EAT ME!!!

In the other hand I looked fabulous with it.

The next poster wore something unusual as a hat.

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I once wore a 'skunk' as a headpiece. To echo what you said, Ylenia, it was Not good! Not good at all!!! As far as I know, I am still banned from all of Cassomir.

The next poster used something unusual to clothe their entire body.

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They call them clothes... They make me feel awkward... So... uncomfortable. I don't get why I cannot just use my magic to keep myself warm and quit using these... clothes.

The next poster is a convinced nudist too.

I don't even feel cold! But people can get so... unpleasant... when you are naked. They usually take it as an invitation to be complete jerks.

The next poster is going to educate the masses about the benefits of nudism.

Liberty's Edge

1st: Not having to waste time choosing clothes or dressing them.
2nd: Not having to hear Marianna complain about how opressive clothes are.
3rd: Showing cool tattoos.
4th: Making Kjeldorn faint happily.

The next poster disaggrees with one of my statements.

I disagree with the statement that I would disagree with one of your statements!

I just made the next poster's head explode . . .

Now my carefully crafted pumpkin head mask is ruined, phooey...

The next poster has a new purpose for the bits of pumpkin.

When in doubt, make it into a pie.

The next poster uses strange ingredients to make pies.

Other pies.

The next poster managed to hatch something out of a pie by sitting on it for two weeks.

Would you believe, four and twenty blackbirds?

The next poster loves to sing a song of sixpence and is actually a really accomplished singer.

I tried to use «Kiss me» as a motivational song in battle, but it didn't catch as a bardic performance. It gave the wrong message. Having a bunch of wretched hobgoblings actually trying to kiss me was too awkward!

The next poster has a good idea for an original bardic performance.

Sovereign Court

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Indeed, but it's not AN original bardic performance, it's THE original bardic performance! I believe you may remember it.

The next poster most certainly does!

Indeed! Even with all my ointments and creams, I was delightfully chaffed for hours afterward!

The next poster will begin my full body massage now, thank you so much.

We'll start with 100grit sandpaper and go grittier from there. Now lay down on this table sander...

The next poster has a Ph.D. in B.S.

Poog can rant for hours, Bull-Sh1te tirade #1.

Next poster know of Phoenix Wright, bull-sh1te evolved series on youtube, and tellz us about their favorite episode.

My favorite episode is where Ward says to June, "Honey, where's the beaver?"

The next poster has no idea what I'm talking about.

The ankheg speaks in tongues! He/She is a warlock/witch! Burn him/her at the stake!

The next poster is bringing the steak.

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It's an ankheg steak. Enjoy, enjoy!

The next poster has worked out how to create boneless ankheg nuggets.

I got your "nuggets" right here. > : - \

The next poster is the spiting image of Marky Mark.

*shakes its head*

"Matt Damon."

*points to next poster.

"Matt Damon!"

*squeezes half of a lemon*

"Matt Damon."

*squeezes the other half of the lemon until the juice runs down his leg*

The next poster knows to whom they should complain about this criminal waste of lemons.

*complains to the Illemonati*

The next poster is going to file an official complaint on my puns.

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I was going to file a complaint but then I realized two things.
(1) I have no clue who to submit it to.
(2) In the name of fairness I would have to file a complaint against nearly everyone on the planet for making a terrible pun at some point.
That task just wouldn't be worth it.

The next poster does know where to file the complaints!!

Wherever burrs or rough edges have developed. Finish off with a light grade of sandpaper, then wipe clean.

The next poster, having given up on filing, is about to sandblast the complaints.

I have taken almost all of the complaints (I'm keeping the mean tweets about me for myself) to the desert and glued them together in the form of a makeshift Speeder. I've contacted the Sand People and let them know that a certain farm boy is in that speeder. Currently, the Sand People are lining up their shot.

The next poster can shape-shift.

I've shifted the square into Reverse and the trapezoid into passing gear.

The next poster drives an automatic shape.

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When you drive a Richard Scary-style cheese wheel car, the only way to drive it is an automatic.

The next poster has also driven a Richard Scary-style Cheese wheel car, but with more disastrous results.

Scarab Sages

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It wound up in a 3-way crash with a bread truck and a tanker of cooking oil, and now there's fondue for miles.

The next poster had sex with Pac-Man.

Fellatio is not actual sex.

The next poster's high school photo looks like this.

I had a bad day. The christmas buffet the day before was... not as healthy as it could have been.

The next poster is drawing up a project involving marmite, speedos, narwhals and trebuchets.

And what a project it is! First I put on my favorite pair of wyvern skin speedos, then we cover the narwhals with a liberal coating of Marmite and load them into the trebuchet. I then advance approximately five hundred yards, face away from the siege engine, brace myself on a pole and [REDACTED! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD REDACTED!]

Such fun for the children!

The next poster is designing commemorative T-Shirts for my project, and will share a couple of potential designs.

Et voila!

Open your eyes!

Oh, you 'ave gone blind, because you 'ave clawed out your own optical organs. Quelle dommage; zat means you are unable to appreciate ze subtle play of burnt maroon and metallic phantom zephyr cerise in ze tiger-stripe pattern we 'ave chosen to apply to Touche-Chèvre's deloublingnoussoillionade. Bouf.

Ze next poster 'as invented a theme park ride based on GoatToucher's project

As you board the narwhal-shaped ride, you are strapped in using only a speedo (Wyvern-simulated). Each individual car lurches up a steep incline and then as it crests the top, the riders are slimed in marmite. The riders zoom down the decline and enter the GoatToucher tunnel. What fun! Nothing is actually shown to the riders because the management doesn't want to induce death; but instead, each rider is given the option of digging their own eyes out with a spoon or having a vulture tear out their eyes for them - thus simulating that they actually saw something in the tunnel. What fun!

The next poster is the carney that runs this particular ride and could tell you some stories!

It's just a day job... So it's whatever, mate.

The next posters got an interesting project of their own.

Behold... the INVISIBLE COW!

The next poster is drowning in invisible milk.

Glub glub glub glub glub glub!

Glub glub glub glub glub *CENSORED* glub glub glub glub glub.

1 person marked this as a favorite.


The next poster secretly performs Pandaren-Gnome facesitting ERP on Moonguard.

Who knew teabagging was such a profitable entertainment business?
Sure, a gnome has been hospitalized after a panda lost balance, but profitable like you wouldn't believe.

The next poster has started their own cooking channel on YouTube.

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See, I saw there was a overlap in certain portions of the cooking and entertainment markets. So I started cooking people so viewers will be entertained by their screams and suffering! Educational, tasty, and new recipes invented by the tanuki himself!

The next poster has tried one of my invented recipes.


*Rampages in approval of tasty cooked mammals*


The next poster will attempt to stop Bloodfang's rampage

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*puts Goattoucher in the next batch of cooked mammals*

*cleans her hands with alcohol and mid-strength acid*

The next poster will dispose of Bloodfang's corpse.

I got to do everything around here?

The next poster also makes a mess.

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