The Next Poster...


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Spaghetti? Sure!
It cannot be too different from baking cookies.

*Spreads chocolate chips on raw spaghetti*
*Puts them in the oven*

Now who wants to taste my delicious spaghetti?

The next poster does.


I doubt it can hurt me, so yes, I will try it... Ugh... This, is awful!!

The next poster hates spaghetti, but has never actually eaten it.


Despite my lack of capacity of eating and hating, I hate everything from which living forms can gain nourishment.

The next poster likes playing with food.


It's the only way I can win at Monopoly.

The next poster can't decide between the little top hat and the lead terrier.


I wanted to play both and have a dog with a hat!

The next poster started a Monopoly game 10 years ago that is still going on.


2 people marked this as a favorite.

It is a play by post monopoly game.

Don't Judge

The next poster has no clue what monopoly is...


Mono...poli...osis? Mono...pol...itis... Mono...poly...hemia.
That sounds like a highly infective disease.

The next poster invented a vaccine against monopoliosis.


Yes I have. It's right here in this tiny needle.

* pulls out a syringe with a 2-foot long needle *

This vaccine needs to be take via the gluteal region. Who's first?

The next poster volunteers another poster to be first.


I'm immune to diseases, so why doesn't Pulg go first...

The next poster enjoys getting sick, being the bizarre masochist that (s)he is...


Yes. Let's get sick together...

The next poster bathes me when I am feeling a bit under the weather.


If that's how you like to see it...
*Grabs him by the ear*
GO take a cold shower!!!

The next poster has never been sick.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

What part of I'm immune to diseases don't you understand!?
(note: the respondent to my last post was strangely appropriate...)

The next poster enjoys a unique brand of cheese


It is a Dairy on Akiton. I don't ask questions.

The next poster visited that Creamery . . .

Scarab Sages

I didn't know you could "milk" large squares of pineapple Jello!

The next poster has been to the alabaster palaces embedded within Sol....


Arrh, poor, poor Mr. Mendelbaum. However, since the operation was a success, 'e'll be right as rain once the swelling goes down.

The next poster was struck off The Register.

Dark Archive

The Register being the name of the ship on which I battled the Vigilante Heaven's Blade. My jaw hurts just thinking about that night. CURSE YOU, DO-GOODER!!! *shakes fist*

The next poster shall reveal Heaven's Blade's secret identity - AND refund my ticket aboard The Register!


Hmm... OH! That Heaven's Blade. Yeah, so this Goblin Paladin showed up in Korvasa at some point, heard about this "Blackjack" guy, and decided to become a vigilante too, 'cause you know, Goblin, and what not, nearly as insane as gnomes... So, yeah... But then he died, and this other guy took on his name, and he's like an Aasamir, so slightly more appropriate there, I think at least, but then he ups and fights this demon lord, goes insane, and he's gone too, and then it's picked up again by this human guy, who isn't a paladin, just some loon trying to fight evil, but without the faintest clue as to what evil is, and I guess he just got lucky deciding to fight you, so, yep... Oh, yeah, his names Vidmaster - some number after that... Whatever, man.

Oh, Yeah, So, Um... The next poster can't read... Like, What's up with that?


I pick up physic impressions from objects, and so I have no need to learn how to read. If the others had this ability you would be ashamed of what you had thought of between your Oh, Yeah, So, Um...

The next poster's idea of clean fun is strapping his friends to the roof of a car and driving through an automated car wash.


With GoatToucher, it's the only way to be sure he is disinfected.

The next poster lost their marbles somewhere inconvenient.


I accidentally swallowed them and had to ask Dalindra to go on a quest inside me to find them! Fortunately, she has some previous experience but I'd rather not tell you about the inhospit places the poor girl had to visit.

The Next Poster lived for a time inside another creature.


Oh my yes. Not completely inside, you understand...

The accommodations were wonderful, particularly the soft weeping. It really lent an ambiance to my stay.

The next poster was my home away from home.


What can I say? I am a warm, cozy and moist giant microbian. I phagocyted GT by accident and he decided to stay until he realized I don't have a recognizable anatomy at all. I'm sorry, GT.

The next poster is a famed microbiologist... or so he says.


Well, I'm tiny, (currently) and enjoy reading books on biology... That's what that means right?

the next poster feels obligated to correct people's grammar mistakes.


It should be «The», with a capital «T». But that's probably more ortography than grammar.
(It was mycrobiologist then?)

The next poster doesn't care for literacy.


Dr. Aria Soto wrote:

(It was mycrobiologist then?)

The next poster doesn't care for literacy.

I just carry books around for show...

(no, Microbiologist would be correct)

The next poster licks everything (s)he sees at least once...


A Saliva Colonizer wrote:
What can I say? I am a warm, cozy and moist giant microbian. I phagocyted GT by accident and he decided to stay until he realized I don't have a recognizable anatomy at all. I'm sorry, GT.

Don't be. It was marvelous!

As for licking things, how else does one learn the taste of fear...

and shame...

and doubt...

and the craving for spicy Chinese food?

The next poster is both creamy -and- delicious.


I've always thought of myself of something that colonized saliva rather than something whose saliva is able to colonize things but... OK, why not?

I'm conquering the whole world by colonizing it with my saliva.

*Licks GH*
*Licks the thread*
*Avoids looking at GT so she doesn't have to lick him*

Man, this alias is disgusting...

The next poster wishes a happy birthday to Dalindra in an unconventional way.

*Licks Dalindra*

Edit: ninja'ed again so...
*Licks to taste herself*
Not creamy and delicious... I taste like a Petri dish.


2 people marked this as a favorite.

"FIRE!!!"

*chops off the rope of the catapult with her axe, sending the trussed-up net of enthusiastic screaming goblins and the heap of chemical barrels into the air*

*watches the contents of the net detonate in a riot of colours to cover the sky*

"Happy birthday, Dalindra."

The next poster was hit by one of the goblin-shaped objects.


Captain Danger Bear asserts that, overall, goblin-shaped objects are less damaging than meteor-shaped objects, and anyway, Lady Danger Bears love fractured skulls.

The next poster is a Lady Danger Bear.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

After that one time, I decided to stick with necromantic spells. Transmutation is just weird.

The next poster has a different opinion.


The lack of picture is because I am never the same form for more than pi minutes. Mmmmmm, pi . . .

The next poster prefers the taste of another Mathematical constant...


I enjoy Avogadro on my salads.

The next poster knows what i tastes like.


Unfortunately, I know Everything Dudes... Even... That...

So, like, dude, the next poster knows why a brain in a jar is called a Tome, when like, it isn't anything like a book, dude...


@Sissyl: Thank you very much! It's the most original felicitation I've ever had.

@Bookends: Well, I don't know why you've mentioned a book, but a brain, just like everything, is composé d'atomes. I suppose yours are truly remarkable.

The next poster explains why its atoms are truly remarkable.


My atoms are unique, remarkable and special because everyone's atoms are.

By the, way, what's an atom? It must be some of that Science things that everybody seems to believe in nowadays.

The next poster is going to prove a well known scientific theory wrong.


Well, the theory of [REDACTED] is completely wrong because of [REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED][REDACTED] *gets kidnapped by the Science Illuminati*

The next poster is on the run from the Science Illuminati...

Liberty's Edge

But they cannot catch me! I can run faster than them, and their Reality doesn't mean a sh*t to me. They cannot stand that I am free from their chains. And soon you'll be free too. Don't worry KahnyaGnorc, I'm coming to the rescue.

The next poster has a plan for rescueing KahnyaGnorc from the Technocratic Union Science Illuminati.


We can't take for assault an Illuminati fortress and expect to win that battle. But I have an idea! I will summon some tornadoes upon their fortress and, while they are distracted trying to cope with them, a group of kenders will infiltrate and rescue KahnyaGnorc! It's a perfect idea!

The next poster will lead the kender group into the fortress.


* drops the kenders in the first pit trap he finds then fills it with concrete*

The next poster has traveled with kenders before and can relate.

Scarab Sages

He was an able enough adventuring Rogue, I suppose, but perhaps a bit uncouth - and upon reflection, I somehow suspect he was not paying the courtesy of telling me the complete truth when he explained the significance of the Kender word "pooty-tang...."

The next poster has broken new ground in the cutting edge of pantaloon technology!


Of course! Computerized, plug-n-play, auto-targeting, turret gun enhanced, orange Pantaloons!! Why didn't anyone else think of that!?

The next poster tries them on.


*Accidentally shoots her feet with the turret guns while trying*

Damn! I'm going to have to replace my feet for pinecones again!

The next poster has a good use for pinecones.


They make nice decorations in mountain cabins.

The next poster has suffered from cabin fever, in such said mountain cabins.


I had to escape . . . but not through the door, too obvious . . . they would be watching the windows, too, so that's a no . . .

The next poster has the perfect way to escape (that doesn't involve teleportation, too easy)


There is an escape tunnel, man, in the basement, dude...
no camera's, and no digging required, thanks to the last dude who figured out he needed out of this cabin man. Told you guys, I know things, dudes.

So, like, the next poster was the one running these foreboding cabins...


1 person marked this as a favorite.

Gotta grow that hoard somehow! I have my claws in all kinds of pies. Foreboding cabin voyeurism, international kender-tossing competitions, Texan death baccarat tournaments...

The next poster is one of my business partners.


Honestly, I didn't even know what was all about, I just wanted to work with a red dragon.

The next poster started a business with Ventnor that didn't work.


So turns out Red dragons don't make good business partners when your product is made of wood.

The next poster knows where it all went wrong.


Poor Ventnor had a flu. You don't want a dragon with a flu.

The next poster has a good idea to get Vid's hair to grow back quickly.

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