Why is no one wearing pants?


Pathfinder First Edition General Discussion

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Dark Archive

We have headband/helm, eye, throat, shoulders, body, cloak/armor, belt, boot, and 2 ring slots, but why no legs slot? is everyone runnin around like in reign the conqueror and 300 with speedo's on? where are magical pants and a pants/legs slot?


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Name Violation wrote:

We have headband/helm, eye, throat, shoulders, body, cloak/armor, belt, boot, and 2 ring slots, but why no legs slot? is everyone runnin around like in reign the conqueror and 300 with speedo's on? where are magical pants and a pants/legs slot?

I too find the lack of magic pants disturbing.


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All I want is a decent pair of pants!

Scarab Sages RPG Superstar 2011 Top 32

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Ooh yeah, like some really cool pants of displacement ... err, wait, no.

That would be bad.

Silver Crusade

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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Wasn't there a magic item called "The Golden Pantaloons"?

Liberty's Edge

Monkey Pants!


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DM_aka_Dudemeister wrote:
Wasn't there a magic item called "The Golden Pantaloons"?

Yes. In Baldur's Gate I and II.


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Parachute pants that cast feather fall 3/days when you fall


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Pants are overrated.


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Name Violation wrote:
We have headband/helm, eye, throat, shoulders, body, cloak/armor, belt, boot, and 2 ring slots, but why no legs slot? is everyone runnin around like in reign the conqueror and 300 with speedo's on?

real life or the game?

Dark Archive

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Maybe cargo pants with lots of pockets?

Pants of Holding-perfect for a Rogue or a well-endowed Half-Orc.

Liberty's Edge

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I find your lack of pants disturbing.

Dark Archive

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Pants of Stuffing: +2 Enhancement Bonus to Intimidate.


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Well, I don't think they were ever fully stated up, but Elminster had magic undergarments of some kind in Elminster in Hell. The book never said what they were, just that they were, indeed, magical.


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Pants for me! Pants for you! If I get a pant, why don't you?!

The Exchange

KnightErrantJR wrote:
Well, I don't think they were ever fully stated up, but Elminster had magic undergarments of some kind in Elminster in Hell. The book never said what they were, just that they were, indeed, magical.

I think those were Boxer Breifs of Viagra.

Grand Lodge

No pants time! No pants time! No pants time! No pants time!

errrr.... guess you had to be there... ahhh the memories!


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Top Ten Reasons There are no Magic Pants.

10. Magic Pants would break the game. Stop being a munchkin.

9. The lack of magic pants is a cut and paste error. Paizo will fix it in the FAQ.

8. Magic pants are unrealistic. They violate the rules of magic. Everyone knows that.

7. Mathematically, magic pants are an inferior build.

6. Magic pants would have to be masterwork first. 300 gp for a pair of pants can not be justified economically.

5. James Jacobs has a personal vendetta against magic pants. He thinks they'd steal focus from the Bard.

4. "Pants" is intellectual property of WotC.

3. Wearing "magic pants" means something obscene according to the Urban Dictionary.

2. "I'll stick it in my pants slot" is not something you want to hear at the gaming table.

And the number one reason there are no magic pants in Pathfinder....

1. Magic pants don't have full spell progression, therefore, they aren't worth wearing.


Moorluck wrote:


I think those were Boxer Breifs of Viagra.

That would probably be a logical conclusion . . . ;)


Mynameisjake wrote:

Top Ten Reasons There are no Magic Pants.

10. Magic Pants would break the game. Stop being a munchkin.

9. The lack of magic pants is a cut and paste error. Paizo will fix it in the FAQ.

8. Magic pants are unrealistic. They violate the rules of magic. Everyone knows that.

7. Mathematically, magic pants are an inferior build.

6. Magic pants would have to be masterwork first. 300 gp for a pair of pants can not be justified economically.

5. James Jacobs has a personal vendetta against magic pants. He thinks they'd steal focus from the Bard.

4. "Pants" is intellectual property of WotC.

3. Wearing "magic pants" means something obscene according to the Urban Dictionary.

2. "I'll stick it in my pants slot" is not something you want to hear at the gaming table.

And the number one reason there are no magic pants in Pathfinder....

1. Magic pants don't have full spell progression, therefore, they aren't worth wearing.

That's it. You win the thread.

Silver Crusade

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Every day is Casual Friday for adventurers.


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As a a wise belligerent dwarf once said..

''DAMN THE PANTS!1one11!exclamationMark11!eleven1!!2''


KnightErrantJR wrote:
Mynameisjake wrote:

Top Ten Reasons There are no Magic Pants.

That's it. You win the thread.

second


Jared Ouimette wrote:
Pants of Stuffing: +2 Enhancement Bonus to Intimidate.

...or a bonus to diplomacy depending on the sexual orientation of the NPC in question.


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lordzack wrote:
All I want is a decent pair of pants!

Solomon Grundy want pants too!


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Moorluck wrote:
KnightErrantJR wrote:
Well, I don't think they were ever fully stated up, but Elminster had magic undergarments of some kind in Elminster in Hell. The book never said what they were, just that they were, indeed, magical.
I think those were Boxer Breifs of Viagra.

Problem is they only work while you are wearing them ... so kind of pointless. :D


4 people marked this as a favorite.

Pants that grant +2 enhancement bonus to Int.

Smartypants

Liberty's Edge

Werecorpse wrote:

Pants that grant +2 enhancement bonus to Int.

Smartypants

Gives a new meaning to ‘your brains are in your ass’.

(Inappropriate for children or the easily offended:)

Spoiler:
Or thinking with your d*ck for that matter.


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Wait, you mean the Pants of Alluring Charisma is NOT core PF?


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Mothman wrote:
I find your lack of pants disturbing.

Yay for Star Wars pants-jokes!

Yoda: I cannot teach this boy, he has no pants...

OR

Lando: Han will get those pants down, we gotta give him time!

OR

Emperor: There is a disturbance in the pants.
Vader: I have felt it, my master.

:D


pres man wrote:
Moorluck wrote:
KnightErrantJR wrote:
Well, I don't think they were ever fully stated up, but Elminster had magic undergarments of some kind in Elminster in Hell. The book never said what they were, just that they were, indeed, magical.
I think those were Boxer Breifs of Viagra.
Problem is they only work while you are wearing them ... so kind of pointless. :D

That's what the hole in the front is for...


KnightErrantJR wrote:
Mynameisjake wrote:

Top Ten Reasons There are no Magic Pants.

10. Magic Pants would break the game. Stop being a munchkin.

9. The lack of magic pants is a cut and paste error. Paizo will fix it in the FAQ.

8. Magic pants are unrealistic. They violate the rules of magic. Everyone knows that.

7. Mathematically, magic pants are an inferior build.

6. Magic pants would have to be masterwork first. 300 gp for a pair of pants can not be justified economically.

5. James Jacobs has a personal vendetta against magic pants. He thinks they'd steal focus from the Bard.

4. "Pants" is intellectual property of WotC.

3. Wearing "magic pants" means something obscene according to the Urban Dictionary.

2. "I'll stick it in my pants slot" is not something you want to hear at the gaming table.

And the number one reason there are no magic pants in Pathfinder....

1. Magic pants don't have full spell progression, therefore, they aren't worth wearing.

That's it. You win the thread.

while i disagree with the order, i conceed victory, mynameisjake, you are the victor sir.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
blackrose_angel wrote:
Parachute pants that cast feather fall 3/days when you fall

Parachute Pants of Depantsing


Mothman wrote:
Monkey Pants!

I have not forgotten this.


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Cursed Item: These pants constrict when the wearer puts them on, and then begin to heat up. They do damage as the heat metal spell

Hot Pants

Shadow Lodge

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Woe to the lady who wears the +1 Shiny pants because of the horrible pick up line: "Do you polish your pants? Because I can see myself in them."

Cursed(?) Item: Bellbottoms. This pair of magical pants have small bells hidden at the bottom of the legs that ring out when the wearer tries to be sneaky.


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Werecorpse wrote:
Pants that grant +2 enhancement bonus to Int. Smartypants

I was going to propose Fancy Pants of Charisma +2.


Maybe we could get the guys at supergenius to devote one of their loot for less products to pants based items.


Let's not forget codpieces now.

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16

And kilts.


This whole thread is greatness.


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Magical Brown Pants of Protection from Fear.

(Well, at least it looks like you're not afraid compared to that time you wore white pants into battle.)


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Pants on Fire: +5 to bluff skill.


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I personally don't want anything with special properties that could malfunction near my private parts.

Grand Lodge

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Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber

Because adventurers do not let the pants confine them.

Liberty's Edge

Name Violation wrote:

We have headband/helm, eye, throat, shoulders, body, cloak/armor, belt, boot, and 2 ring slots, but why no legs slot? is everyone runnin around like in reign the conqueror and 300 with speedo's on? where are magical pants and a pants/legs slot?

I think the contents of this thread are reason enough why there isn't one. :)

Liberty's Edge

My adventurers wear shorts.

Grand Lodge

Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber

Short shorts?


we hases pants of stinking cloud!


Don't forget magic leg warmers when going into arctic climes. Or, long johns of cold resistance.

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