The Haiku Game


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But it was a lie,
None left for me at all now,
I was promised cake

Liberty's Edge

I was promised cake
Instead, there was only steak
I have no complaints

Scarab Sages

I have no complaints
Voiced them years ago, ignored
Now ready to KILL


Now ready to KILL
Anger leads to vi-o-lence
The Dark Side tempts me


1 person marked this as a favorite.

The Dark Side tempts me,
But, on this Thanksgiving Day
I'll stick to white meat.

Liberty's Edge

"I'll stick to white meat."
"Whoah, too much information!"
Dirty minds at work.

Scarab Sages

Dirty minds at work
Whiteboard diagram looks like
Genitalia


Genitalia
And I will say this once more,
Genitalia

Liberty's Edge

Genitalia
Sounds like a foreign country
For some, it could be!


"For some, it could be!"
No, my young and naive friend,
Shame is not for sale.


Shame is not for sale
That special event is done
This week's deal: butter


This week's deal: butter
Howie's game show jumps the shark
Next up: Jump the Shark!

Scarab Sages

Next up: Jump the Shark!
Upper-Class Twit of the Year
Now with new events!


Now with new events!
Summer camp to the extreme
Stalk and kill a bear


RAAAAAWWWRRR
RAAAAAWWWWHHHHRRRRR
RAAAAAWWWHHHRRR*

*Stalk and kill a bear
Never going to happen
Because the nose knows.

Liberty's Edge

Be Cause. The "No"'s knows
That it cancels the effect
If spoken firmly.


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If spoken firmly,
This little incantation
Will summon pudding.


"Will, summon pudding,"
Said the wizardly countess
To her apprentice

Liberty's Edge

To her apprentice
She left all her reagents,
Mortar and pestle

Scarab Sages

Mortar and pestle
Sanitized metaphor for
Yoni and lingam

Liberty's Edge

Yoni and Lingam
Are creative counterparts
For long-term projects


For long term "projects"
Make sure to stretch your hamstrings
And lubricate well.

Liberty's Edge

"...and lubricate well,"
she read from the instructions.
"Well, that's explicit."


"Well, that's explicit.
This pill is for giving worms
to your ex-girlfriends."

Liberty's Edge

To your ex-girlfriends
You're fundamentally flawed
They're the same to you

Scarab Sages

They're the same to you?
Coca-Cola and Pepsi
Be proud you can't tell!

I used to be unable to tell, but somewhere along the way it became Coke-only for me. :/


Be proud you can't tell!
Only a few folks have been
Inside my "Workroom".


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Inside my workroom
I keep two tons of oatmeal
But I don't know why


"But I don't know why"
Her words ring hollow and false
She stole the donut!


She stole the donut
The only thing that gives relief
To my hemorrhoids.


To my hemorrhoids
I have only this to say:
A pox upon you!


A pox upon you!
Tentacles all around you!
Brain Worms within you!

Liberty's Edge

Brain, worms within you.
Yes, Pinky. Tonight we will
Take over the world!

Scarab Sages

"TAKE OVER THE WOOOOOORLD!!!"
Mad scientists with robots
Better than bankers

Liberty's Edge

Better than bankers
Politicians' promises?
Not bloody likely!


Not bloody likely!
I never get a twenty!
Time to get new dice.


"Time to get new dice!"
The gambler proclaimed after
He learned how to cheat.


Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Card Game, Lost Omens, Rulebook Subscriber

He learned how to cheat
Rolled Knowledge (Metagaming)
It's a nat 20

Scarab Sages

Nat the 20th
Revolutionary blood
Walks among us still

Liberty's Edge

Woks among us...still?
We're not serving Chinese food
Start making pizzas!

Scarab Sages

Start making pizzas!
The customer's always right
At the Krusty Krab


At the Krusty Krab
The Kurgan's soul fades away
Never to burn out.


Never II: Burn Out
A mediocre film with
Awful CGI


1 person marked this as a favorite.

Awful! See G.I.?
It all full of ulcers now!
You poop lots of blood!


"You poop lots of blood!"
Shrieked the withered dying hag
Disgusting death curse

Liberty's Edge

Disgusting Death Curse
A Black Metal band from Prague
Crank up the volume!


"Crank up the volume!"
Shouted my old grandfather
"My ears do not work!"


"My years do not work!"
Shouted the grandfather clock.
"It's 1908!"


"It's 1908!"
Said the newspaper headline
On January First

Liberty's Edge

On January First
The New Year supplants the Old
Vile Young Usurper!

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