Wacky Insane Stuff In Published Adventures


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I couldn't really reconcile this to any other forum than this one. It's not system specific, or I'd've thrown it in 3.x/OGL... but this transcends game setting in my opinion.

That said, I'd like to ask what's the strangest thing you've ever encountered in a published adventure? No, really, the most "What the...?" type encounter.

I can top it. But only if you follow the logic.

Ok, we're on the Positive Material Plane. We're chasing a demon-hearted great wyrm red Dragon (if you've played Bastion of Unborn Souls, you might know what's coming next)

And after beating our way through what amounts to about 100+ combined hit dice of demons, we enter the sanctum sanctorum-ish.

Four. Unique. Monsters. All of them with the "Half-Dragon" template.

Ok, Kobold Half Dragon. Not too much of a stretch to see where such a creature came from.

Chimera Half Dragon. Bit more of a "Huh?"

Ettin Half Dragon. Two heads = Twice the breath weapon. Meep!

Advanced template Dire Bear... Half Dragon. At this point, I looked at my GM and made a noise of pure incredulity. "Hi! I'm an evil dragon with aspirations of devouring the souls of an entire world before they're incarnate. I'm so evil I MATED AND REPRODUCED WITH A DIRE BEAR!!"

We laughed so hard I think we both nearly became sick. And every time "Grizzly"'s initiative came around, we started cracking up again. I'm having trouble typing this with a straight face.

...

Seriously, this blows the doors off the "Calzone Golem" that I once found in a published WotC adventure.

So, with that said, what's the most off the wall thing YOU have encountered, dear readers? Because if there's anything more truly bizzare than a Half-Dragon Dire Bear... I'd really like to know what it is.

Grand Lodge

I'm with you, here, but...

What if a Great Wyrm, Infernal Green Dragon Sorcerer/ Transmuter has been doing some evil experiments for the last couple of centuries on the Abyssal Red Dragon he defeated and captured while whooping up the punk-demons in the Blood War?

So now, he has a bunch of test-tube halfbreeds that he created.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

For me, the stupidest thing ever in recent years was a dragon vampire. I don't care that the explanation was that Dragotha cursed an enemy with a spell to make it vampric -- I can't get past seeing a vampire walking up to a Silver Dragon saying "I vant / to suck / your blood!". It's stupid.


Mikhaila Burnett wrote:
So, with that said, what's the most off the wall thing YOU have encountered, dear readers? Because if there's anything more truly bizzare than a Half-Dragon Dire Bear... I'd really like to know what it is.

How about a half-dragon half-celestial half-illithid half-elf?

It don't make sense.


He's twice the man you are...


Mikhaila Burnett wrote:
Seriously, this blows the doors off the "Calzone Golem" that I once found in a published WotC adventure.

God, I am so hungry...when is lunch?

Grand Lodge

And if you go back to the late 80's, Dave Arneson put a handful of Tarrasques -- as random encounters -- in the same adventure.

DM: You hear something big charging toward you

PCs: We look in that direction

DM: You see the first of a handful of Tarrasques charging you

PCs: Wow, are you sure Dave Arneson wrote this?!


Mikhaila Burnett wrote:
So, with that said, what's the most off the wall thing YOU have encountered, dear readers? Because if there's anything more truly bizzare than a Half-Dragon Dire Bear... I'd really like to know what it is.

How about singing, dancing mushrooms? (OLD MAN KATAN AND THE INCREDIBLE, EDIBLE, DANCING MUSHROOM BAND, from Dungeon magazine #41.)


Kobold Cleaver wrote:
Mikhaila Burnett wrote:
So, with that said, what's the most off the wall thing YOU have encountered, dear readers? Because if there's anything more truly bizzare than a Half-Dragon Dire Bear... I'd really like to know what it is.

How about a half-dragon half-celestial half-illithid half-elf?

It don't make sense.

Sweetie, I keep telling you that your fourth father was a satyr, not an elf.


Kobold Cleaver wrote:
Mikhaila Burnett wrote:
So, with that said, what's the most off the wall thing YOU have encountered, dear readers? Because if there's anything more truly bizzare than a Half-Dragon Dire Bear... I'd really like to know what it is.

How about a half-dragon half-celestial half-illithid half-elf?

It don't make sense.

<Gives Kobold Cleaver a hug>

There, there. It's OK.


as bad as it may seem if you truly want horrible I suggest going back to second edition and looking at the pages of Castle Greyhawk. There you will find 3 foot tall bull headed men called mini-taurs or run into a gnome in a fedora carrying a whip and a gold idol running from some nazi-dressed were rats(ratzis) screaming "ve vile find you oklahoma gnome!
getting through that adventure with everything from marvel comics(drider-man anyone) to star trek TOS (dammit djinn I'm a doctor not a cleric)to just about anythng you can imagine from the 80's.

Hope you enjoy it.

Liberty's Edge Contributor, RPG Superstar 2012

Steven Tindall wrote:

as bad as it may seem if you truly want horrible I suggest going back to second edition and looking at the pages of Castle Greyhawk. There you will find 3 foot tall bull headed men called mini-taurs or run into a gnome in a fedora carrying a whip and a gold idol running from some nazi-dressed were rats(ratzis) screaming "ve vile find you oklahoma gnome!

getting through that adventure with everything from marvel comics(drider-man anyone) to star trek TOS (dammit djinn I'm a doctor not a cleric)to just about anythng you can imagine from the 80's.

Hope you enjoy it.

My friends and I loved that module.

From what I've read, though, it upset a lot of people when it was released.

Dark Archive

Steven Tindall wrote:

as bad as it may seem if you truly want horrible I suggest going back to second edition and looking at the pages of Castle Greyhawk. There you will find 3 foot tall bull headed men called mini-taurs or run into a gnome in a fedora carrying a whip and a gold idol running from some nazi-dressed were rats(ratzis) screaming "ve vile find you oklahoma gnome!

getting through that adventure with everything from marvel comics(drider-man anyone) to star trek TOS (dammit djinn I'm a doctor not a cleric)to just about anythng you can imagine from the 80's.

Hope you enjoy it.

Social references in gaming? By Gygax? Never!!

Gygax was the epitome of dorkiness. This surprises me not at all.

*grins*

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 16

Castle Greyhawk was written after Gygax had been forced out of TSR, and it was a giant F U to him and Greyhawk fans.

The Exchange

Aaron Bitman wrote:
Mikhaila Burnett wrote:
So, with that said, what's the most off the wall thing YOU have encountered, dear readers? Because if there's anything more truly bizzare than a Half-Dragon Dire Bear... I'd really like to know what it is.
How about singing, dancing mushrooms? (OLD MAN KATAN AND THE INCREDIBLE, EDIBLE, DANCING MUSHROOM BAND, from Dungeon magazine #41.)

I remember that one - Singing Mushrooms...

Mawi ada widle wam! Widle wam! widle wam!
Mawi ada widle wam anis fleas waz wytaz sno!

Freaking hillarious...and it was five adventures by the same author - THere was the Fire in the Capital, The delivery of Taxes for a general, The seige of Kratyes freehold, old man Katan and his singing mushrooms, and a troll who sang and romanced some girl without her knowing hes a troll?

The Exchange

Vigil wrote:
Castle Greyhawk was written after Gygax had been forced out of TSR, and it was a giant F U to him and Greyhawk fans.

That infighting realy screwed TSR. Especially when Gygax tried to buy up all the shares and take control only to have the majority share holders dump all their share in the hands of that woman who didnt give a crap about inhouse playtesting.


Vigil wrote:
Castle Greyhawk was written after Gygax had been forced out of TSR, and it was a giant F U to him and Greyhawk fans.

Yes, WG7 was poorly received by many Greyhawk fans, but no it wasn't an anything to Gygax and the Greyhawk fans--it was what it was: a really poor attempt at injecting humor into D&D.

Dark Archive

*sheepish*

I forgot that WG7 was post-Gygax module. My wife's ranted at me about that too.

*slinks off in Grognard shame*


Joshua J. Frost wrote:
Vigil wrote:
Castle Greyhawk was written after Gygax had been forced out of TSR, and it was a giant F U to him and Greyhawk fans.
Yes, WG7 was poorly received by many Greyhawk fans, but no it wasn't an anything to Gygax and the Greyhawk fans--it was what it was: a really poor attempt at injecting humor into D&D.

It had some entertaining artwork by the fellow who did the early Paranoia 'RPG' artwork though.

Indiana Gnome

Mini-onions of Set

The couch potato illusionist

Star Trek original series rip-off

Numerous other rip-offs

Fun to read ^_^

The stay-puft marshmallow dread wraiths (in 3e terms) would be a rude surprise though. :P


Expedition to the Barrier Peaks... the whole thing... especially the Vegipygmies


Pathfinder Companion, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Charter Superscriber
Mikhaila Burnett wrote:


Seriously, this blows the doors off the "Calzone Golem" that I once found in a published WotC adventure.

I kind of liked that Calzone golem...


I once refused to continue in a campaign with a guy I had just started playing with (and didn't know very well) when he ran that calzone golem stuff. I didn't know it was an official module at the time, I thought it was something weird he was making up because he was a weirdo.

I did play with him a bit more after that and we had a semi-normal campaign until it ended with one of the party PCs killing the DMPC and trying to take out the rest of the party but running out of spells before he got around to attacking my guy so surrendering when my guy drew his shortswords and gave him the option. My rogue was the only good-aligned character in the party.


People really interested in the Module-which-must-not-be-named should root around the boards for Chris Mortika's posts on the subject, as he had an insider's view to what was happening with it. (He's a very knowledgeable and humble guy, and a credit to our community.)


yellowdingo wrote:
Freaking hillarious...and it was five adventures by the same author - THere was the Fire in the Capital, The delivery of Taxes for a general, The seige of Kratyes freehold, old man Katan and his singing mushrooms...

Ted James Thomas Zuvich did indeed write A Hot Day in L'trel (Dungeon magazine issue #44), Courier Service (#27), and The Siege of Kratys Freehold (#33).

yellowdingo wrote:
...and a troll who sang and romanced some girl without her knowing hes a troll?

Um... that one sounds like Song of the Fens (issue #40), which was by J. Bradley Schell.

And incidentally, Zuvich also wrote Dovedale (#46), The Vaka's Curse (#50), and Caveat Emptor (#58).


Aaron Bitman wrote:
yellowdingo wrote:
Freaking hillarious...and it was five adventures by the same author - THere was the Fire in the Capital, The delivery of Taxes for a general, The seige of Kratyes freehold, old man Katan and his singing mushrooms...

Ted James Thomas Zuvich did indeed write A Hot Day in L'trel (Dungeon magazine issue #44), Courier Service (#27), and The Siege of Kratys Freehold (#33).

yellowdingo wrote:
...and a troll who sang and romanced some girl without her knowing hes a troll?

Um... that one sounds like Song of the Fens (issue #40), which was by J. Bradley Schell.

And incidentally, Zuvich also wrote Dovedale (#46), The Vaka's Curse (#50), and Caveat Emptor (#58).

Having last week GMed old man Katan (as a not so serious interlude in my campaign, because some players couldn't make it), I didn't know Zuvich wrote these other adventures as well. Many years ago, I used Dovedale a few times to start a campaign or as an introduction to new players: excellent adventure. The Vaka's was fun to play/GM as well.

I am going to check his other adventures...

Hagor

Dark Archive

Ombical, Wizard-King of Elyria wrote:
Mikhaila Burnett wrote:


Seriously, this blows the doors off the "Calzone Golem" that I once found in a published WotC adventure.
I kind of liked that Calzone golem...

So did I, actually. It was well played and not over the top comedy. I unfortunately already told my wife about it, so I doubt I'll ever get to run it though.

The Exchange

it is the only golem that when you kill it you have lunch prepared.

Dark Archive

Crimson Jester wrote:
it is the only golem that when you kill it you have lunch prepared.

Just don't hit break the skin, or you better have a good reflex save.

The Exchange

Mikhaila Burnett wrote:
Crimson Jester wrote:
it is the only golem that when you kill it you have lunch prepared.
Just don't hit break the skin, or you better have a good reflex save.

Yes, however we leave that for the Vomit guy Thread.

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