Sunny Cult Seeking New Recruits


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lynora wrote:
Yikes. I'm heading back to the Frog Pond. It's safer there. Too bad. This was such a nice cult. Thanks for the help getting away, Jacks. Much obliged.

No problem ma'am, our pleasure.

Hey guys, lets take this party to the club house!

*gathers the rum, girls and tribbles, and departs*


Frat Jack wrote:
lynora wrote:
Yikes. I'm heading back to the Frog Pond. It's safer there. Too bad. This was such a nice cult. Thanks for the help getting away, Jacks. Much obliged.

No problem ma'am, our pleasure.

Hey guys, lets take this party to the club house!

*gathers the rum, girls and tribbles, and departs*

Sounds great. Let's go!


The treant pops in to seek out the Scaly Thread Lord for help with a rapidly spreading avatar identity crisis. Seeing no signs of battle he moves on...


Rajneesh Zimmerman, MegaPope wrote:

Big Stevie chuckles

And who would be godmodding now, little lizard? I assume you pulled this mysterious Dispeller out of your beltpouch? And voila!

Pulls an Anti-Dispeller Field Generator from his voluminous cloak.

I have this now.

Turns on field and resumes his lunch

Not to mention if attacking an inhabitant is grounds for leaving a thread ...

stares pointedly at the small lizard.

See, I'm protecting the thread. You threaten it by attempting to alter it significantly.

I asked you nicely. Cease molesting these folk, or I shall hit you with my 'Anti-Anti-Dispeller Field Generator', then with the Dispeller.
Look, I dislike attacking other Paizonians. Up to now, I've only attacked those who kill other Paizonians, and even then not always. If you wish to continue bullying these inhabitants, then you will have a difficult fight on your hands, though, shields or no shields. Now, will you stop this rubbish, or am I going to have to start seriously inconveniencing you?


Hoo! Hooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Waves hand up and down and shakes it wildly.


Harumfs

My good lizard, I was merely preparing a marketing crusade on this thread. I didn't threaten or kill anyone. Now I can go at this as long as you require, but I do not understand why I have attracted your shrieking yowliness.

The porcine priest points to Big Tex.

Yes! You with the excitable hand! What do you require?


Rajneesh Zimmerman, MegaPope wrote:

Harumfs

My good lizard, I was merely preparing a marketing crusade on this thread. I didn't threaten or kill anyone. Now I can go at this as long as you require, but I do not understand why I have attracted your shrieking yowliness.

The porcine priest points to Big Tex.

Yes! You with the excitable hand! What do you require?

*Shrugs*

Fine. It would appear that I misinterpreted the situation. My apologies.
Bear in mind that I'll be back the minute that you actually attack, though.
Goodbye!
*Teleports*


shrug

Well that was unexpected ....


*BLAAAAH!*

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!


Ah...I was just gonna tell KC that he wuz gonna have ta inconvenience ya.


Winces

Ah ..Yes ... Ok boys, since you are here can you help the Swiss Cheese Guards clean up some of the mess that reptile fellow left behind ...

Sheesh talk about Chaotic Jumpy ...


Scurries off to watch more interesting wildlife while eating chili dogs.


Big Tex wrote:
Ah...I was just gonna tell KC that he wuz gonna have ta inconvenience ya.

Ah .. good fellow. Say you look like a strapping fellow, have you ever considered a career in the Assistant Manager Deacon program offered by Church and Munch™? Lots of oppotunities for a bright young lad like yourself.


Rajneesh Zimmerman, MegaPope wrote:

shrug

Well that was unexpected ....

Yeah, that is a great webcomic.

*Yawns*


tilts head


Dread Lord Poodle wrote:
tilts head

It's one of the many OotS fancomics.

;)


¨*asks fr directions to give a few hundred turns to lay down to sleep*


I say, where did all these poodles appear from?


Rajneesh Zimmerman, MegaPope wrote:
I say, where did all these poodles appear from?

You can ask that thrice cursed llama wannabe Courtfool.


Hmmm, a surplus of poodles. Perhaps you could be of use in my franchise. I need some cute talking animals to promote my new Double Bacon Explosion™ menu addition. Any of you interested in making a commercial? Maybe as the Double Bacon Explosion™ dogs?


Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! Only one thing smells like bacon and that's, bacon!

On that bag!

What's it say?

I can't read!


You're not taking credit for the Bacon Explosion. You didn't invent it; you didn't introduce it to these boards. Don't make me sic the powers of Gygax upon you, MegaPoop.


Demon Lord of Tribbles wrote:
This thread needs three things, Tribbles , strippers and RUM. Lucky, I brought all three

You are blessed my son.


Mairkurion {tm} wrote:
You're not taking credit for the Bacon Explosion. You didn't invent it; you didn't introduce it to these boards. Don't make me sic the powers of Gygax upon you, MegaPoop.

Looks askance at the pagan treant fellow

"Never claimed I did good fellow! I merely marketed the thing to the masses!"

Extends a sliced Double Bacon Explosion Bliss Meal™

"Would you like one?"


Rajneesh Zimmerman, MegaPope wrote:

The kobold's fireball glances off the Swiss Cheese Guards' force shields

Ehh? What's this? A reptiloid? Obviously a McManichean or some such heathen. Tell me yapping one why I should leave? I see a franchise opportunity here ... once the heathens are converted of course.

Remeber Rajneesh, all franchises must tithe to the corporate head, that is the Sunny Godhead. Failure to do so is grounds for explusion.

I'm a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day.....


Swivels over to the bright godling

Ahha! The head heretic! I am considering a repurposing of your thread. Its full of strippers, tribbles and excitable kobolds with too many spell slots for their own good. Nothing but heresy as far as the eye can see. There is still time to repent and participate in our Double Bacon Explosion Half-Price Fun Friday Sing-A-Long™!


Trey wrote:
Got any SunnyD? They've been bottling sunshine since 1964!

Yes my child, we here at the Church of the Sunny Godhead, I've annoited SunnyD as the offical holy beverage of the church.

:::Waves Hand:::

:::Enters several scantly clad waitresses holding trays of SunnyD for all:::

We have vodka. Care for screwdrivers?


Rajneesh Zimmerman, MegaPope wrote:

Swivels over to the bright godling

Ahha! The head heretic! I am considering a repurposing of your thread. Its full of strippers, tribbles and excitable kobolds with too many spell slots for their own good. Nothing but heresy as far as the eye can see. There is still time to repent and participate in our Double Bacon Explosion Half-Price Fun Friday Sing-A-Long™!

SOUNDS LIKE FUN!

Except for the repenting part....


Sunny Godhead wrote:
Trey wrote:
Got any SunnyD? They've been bottling sunshine since 1964!

Yes my child, we here at the Church of the Sunny Godhead, I've annoited SunnyD as the offical holy beverage of the church.

:::Waves Hand:::

:::Enters several scantly clad waitresses holding trays of SunnyD for all:::

We have vodka. Care for screwdrivers?

Ooh, yes, that sounds delicious. Oops. I see the MegaPope is still here. I'll just take mine to go.


lynora wrote:

Ooh, yes, that sounds delicious. Oops. I see the MegaPope is still here. I'll just take mine to go.

Fear not. I shall shine upon him until he gets a bad sunburn.


Never fear. I am leaving you heretics to your own devices. I have a new franchise going up across the way, and I don't have the time or resources for a proper crusade at the moment. Farewell.

Exits Stage Left, Swiss Cheese Guards and minions trailing after. The engines of a Mark VII Surface-To-Orbit Popemobile fire up from offstage.


Rajneesh Zimmerman, MegaPope wrote:

Never fear. I am leaving you heretics to your own devices. I have a new franchise going up across the way, and I don't have the time or resources for a proper crusade at the moment. Farewell.

Exits Stage Left, Swiss Cheese Guards and minions trailing after. The engines of a Mark VII Surface-To-Orbit Popemobile fire up from offstage.

Well, in that case...

*sets up a deck chair, grabs a screwdriver, and relaxes in the sunshine*


Rajneesh Zimmerman, MegaPope wrote:

Never fear. I am leaving you heretics to your own devices. I have a new franchise going up across the way, and I don't have the time or resources for a proper crusade at the moment. Farewell.

Exits Stage Left, Swiss Cheese Guards and minions trailing after. The engines of a Mark VII Surface-To-Orbit Popemobile fire up from offstage.

Hey! You forgot your blasphemous sunglasses! Hey, wait a second. This might work in my church.

Okay! Who wants free sunglasses!

I'm going to take them a to whole new market. A tax-free market.

Yes, Sunny Godhead loves his followers. Sunglasses so my disciples may bath in my radiant glory but not go blind when they look at his divine status.

Excuse me, I have commandments to write and pass onto some fleeing refugees.


*raises a hand*
I'll take a pair of sunglasses.
*gets out paper and pen*
Okay, I don't know where you're going to get the fleeing refugees, but I can take notes if you're giving out commandments.


Thou shalt wear SPF 75 at all times.


Thou shalt not directly at the sun, lest you become blind.


lynora wrote:

*raises a hand*

I'll take a pair of sunglasses.

Here your are, oh eager one. *sends a pair of mirrored sunglasses via a divine sunbeam*

"lynora wrote:

*gets out paper and pen*

Okay, I don't know where you're going to get the fleeing refugees, but I can take notes if you're giving out commandments.

Ah, commandment Numero One: Thou shall not drape thyself in pasty white skin. Thou shall bathe in the radiant until nicely tanned.

Commandment Two: Thou shall love the outdoors, even if thou are Drow or Undead. If my radiant beams of light burn or incinerate you, so what!

Commandment Three: Thou bleach thy hair golden blonde with the rays of the sun. Peroxide and bleach are blasphemous, and thus prohibited.

Commandment Four: When in summer, swimwear is the appropriate clothing of the church. Carry an ice chest filled with refreshments at all times. Hard liquor preferred but not necessary. Yes, even the Sunny Godhead like cold refreshments.

Commandment Five: Snowmen are vile and an idolic mockery of summer. Build them and I will melt them in the season to come.

Commandment Six: Ice skating and ice skating with the stars is unwholesome activities. Thus band in the Church/Cult/Enclave, etc.

Commandment Seven: Swimming pools are shrines to the Sunny Godhead, as are clean beaches. Handle with care.

That's for now, some more in days to follow.


Do you mind if I stand behind one of you gauys? Enjoy th shadow you cast, of course 8)

I love a nice dark shadow, cast down by a shiny bright sun!


The Shade wrote:

Do you mind if I stand behind one of you gauys? Enjoy th shadow you cast, of course 8)

I love a nice dark shadow, cast down by a shiny bright sun!

Stand where you please for the Sunny Godhead shine upon all.


I have a question. You said that pools and beaches are sacred. How do you feel about ponds?


lynora wrote:
I have a question. You said that pools and beaches are sacred. How do you feel about ponds?

Most interesing question!

*sits at the edge of the seat*


passes out on the ground in a nice warm sunbeam


lynora wrote:
I have a question. You said that pools and beaches are sacred. How do you feel about ponds?

Sunny ponds are all right, minus the bugs and mosquitos.


CourtFool wrote:

passes out on the ground in a nice warm sunbeam

*Smiles*

It's true. All DOGS are solar powered.


Sunny Godhead wrote:
lynora wrote:
I have a question. You said that pools and beaches are sacred. How do you feel about ponds?
Sunny ponds are all right, minus the bugs and mosquitos.

Hmmm. If there aren't any bugs what do we feed the frogs? Or are the frogs what are keeping there from being any bugs?

uh-oh. Be right back.


Okay, I'm back. There was a bit of an emergency at the frog pond.


The collective drops sensor pods to determine the usefulness of the area


Can I sunbathe au naturale? It's tough to find a Speedo for a golem.


Enters cult area. Plunks down folding chair and umbrella. Drops large cooler in front. Arrainges mojito fixins and makes himself a drink. Sits down and sips

Ahhh.


Malice Jack wrote:

Enters cult area. Plunks down folding chair and umbrella. Drops large cooler in front. Arrainges mojito fixins and makes himself a drink. Sits down and sips

Ahhh.

Sets down a keg in a large bucket of ice.

Did you remember the frisbee for the poodles? We need to practice our backswings and targeting. Not to mention our shock tactics. ERR...I mean spend the day enjoying ourselves.

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