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FOLLOWSTONE
Aura faint divination, strong conjuration; CL 13th
Slot –; Price 7,000 gp; Weight 1 lb.
I've got to say the price is off. I figure this:
DETECT MAGIC 1000
TELEPORT, GRTR 3150
NO SLOT USE X 2
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PRICE 8,300 GPPlus I'm not sure if MY pricing is right. 'Cause it allows you to think the command. You may need to apply the meta-magic feat Silent Spell to the mix.
The followstone's ability to be used by anyone might cause me to raise it's price. I'd put it in the interesting, but I don't think I want to use it pile.
The pricing was interesting because it isn't a slotted item, it's a use-activated item. So it's priced in the same way as a potion of cure light wounds for the teleportation effect; you have to be holding it, taking up one hand, to activate it. I left the cost of the detect magic at 1,000, since while it's continuous, it's got a very narrow application compared to detect magic. Then I added about 1,500 for the immediate action thing. Maybe that should have been more, but it has such a specific use that I decided to lowball it. One of the reasons I didn't submit it was that I was very shaky on the cost. In my experience, even at 7,000, I'm not sure the D&D players I know would go for it, but I don't know how well that translates to the wider community. YMMV, and all that.
Basically;
1 use greater teleport, use-activated: 4,550
Detect magic, specific use, continous if held; 1,000
Arbitrary price increase for immediate action, specificity of item, etc.; 1,450 (gets us to a nice round number)
(You may add the line 'Surprising the smug wizard seconds after he thinks he's made a perfect escape; Priceless' at your discretion.)
FOLLOWSTONE
Aura faint divination, strong conjuration; CL 13th
Slot –; Price 7,000 gp; Weight 1 lb.
DESCRIPTION
A followstone looks like a whitish orb, roughly the size of an apple, with an opalescent sheen. The abilities of a followstone function only when the item is grasped firmly in one hand, and are twofold.Firstly, the followstone glows with a pearly light whenever a conjuration (teleportation) effect is used within 60 ft. of it.
Secondly, when a followstone detects such an effect, you may (as an immediate (mental) action) command the followstone to transport you to the intended destination of that teleportation effect at the start of your next action. This ability functions as if using greater teleport targeting only yourself. Use of this ability grants you no foreknowledge of what or where the intended destination is, and the ability fails if the intended destination is on another plane or is warded against teleportation effects (such as by forbiddance or similar spells).
A successful use of a followstone’s teleportation ability destroys the followstone.
CONSTRUCTION
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, detect magic, greater teleport; Cost 1750 gp, 140 xp
I kind of like this one. It covers that annoying gap when an evil villain teleports away and the heroes are left holding the bag. If at least one of them can follow after...even if it's just the party rogue...in order to learn where the villain retreated to, then I think it's a useful device.
I like that it's a one-shot item. Use it and it's gone. It can't get you back. It doesn't tell you where you teleported. It's kind of like a tracking device with the means to magically grapple or latch on to the teleporting individual so you can travel along. It even has the added use of acting as a tag-along with a friendly teleporting spellcaster who just doesn't have a high enough caster level to bring along enough extra willing subjects.
Now, I do agree that the costing is off. I'd also recommend that you include scrying or find the path as a requirement...as there needs to be a more powerful divination effect in there to pick up on a teleporting individual's destination. Aside from that, I think the creative idea behind this one has a lot of merit.
My two-cents,
--Neil
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I kind of like this one. It covers that annoying gap when an evil villain teleports away and the heroes are left holding the bag. If at least one of them can follow after...even if it's just the party rogue...in order to learn where the villain retreated to, then I think it's a useful device.I like that it's a one-shot item. Use it and it's gone. It can't get you back. It doesn't tell you where you teleported. It's kind of like a tracking device with the means to magically grapple or latch on to the teleporting individual so you can travel along. It even has the added use of acting as a tag-along with a friendly teleporting spellcaster who just doesn't have a high enough caster level to bring along...
The consensus does seem to be that I undercosted the followstone, and that's cool. Mea culpa. I suspect my decision may have been coloured by the people I game with, who are very wary of expensive one-shot items. If it's worth more than about 5,000 gp, chances are they're going to sell it rather than keep it for a rainy day. I can understand their thinking; burning through thousands of gold pieces in one action somehow seems a heaftier price to pay than burning through it in 3, 5 or 50 uses.
Oh, and I really like the idea of adding find the path to the prerequisites. Doing that would seem to increase the cost to..hmm...10,000-15,000 gp, depending on how large a price hike you think the immediate action thing is worth. Does that sound more reasonable to people?
Oh, and I'd like to thank the people who have commented on this item so far. I've already learnt a few things about making wondrous items, and, more importantly, my own weaknesses when making items, and that's the sort of thing that'll just keep on being useful.
Does that sound more reasonable to people?
It does in a general sense. But to satisfy yourself that you've hit the mark, you should compare it to other items around the same cost. Also, I like Clark's method of comparing it to the cost you'd need when using several spell scrolls to duplicate the effect. Line those things up and then eyeball it. Unfortunately, that's probably a little more necessary for your item than a few others. But that's because item costing for wondrous items is an art, not a science.
Hope that helps and keep designing,
--Neil
FOLLOWSTONE
Aura faint divination, strong conjuration; CL 13th
Slot –; Price 7,000 gp; Weight 1 lb.
DESCRIPTION
A followstone looks like a whitish orb, roughly the size of an apple, with an opalescent sheen. The abilities of a followstone function only when the item is grasped firmly in one hand, and are twofold.Firstly, the followstone glows with a pearly light whenever a conjuration (teleportation) effect is used within 60 ft. of it.
Secondly, when a followstone detects such an effect, you may (as an immediate (mental) action) command the followstone to transport you to the intended destination of that teleportation effect at the start of your next action. This ability functions as if using greater teleport targeting only yourself. Use of this ability grants you no foreknowledge of what or where the intended destination is, and the ability fails if the intended destination is on another plane or is warded against teleportation effects (such as by forbiddance or similar spells).
A successful use of a followstone’s teleportation ability destroys the followstone.
CONSTRUCTION
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, detect magic, greater teleport; Cost 1750 gp, 140 xp
I dont mind the name at all.
Frankly, I think this is a really intersting item. I havent given it the usual "think-through," as I would for a submission. If submitted, I would have said that I need to think about this one more. I sense an abusability here but I am not seeing it.
I like alot of the limits. I like it is consumed on use. I like that it gives you no idea where the destination is--and, frankly, it may be one you wouldnt want to go to.
I need to look up "effect" to see if that is a sufficient descriptor. I presume you intend to include all teleportation type effects. But would that include a creature's SA or Ex power that mimics a conjuration (teleportation) effect? I dont know that calling it a "conjuration (teleportation) effect" is the best way to describe it. But it might be. I have to think about this one for a bit.
All that aside, while it is a niche item, I happen to think this is cool and it would get a longer look from me.
You realize, of course, that conjuration (teleportation) includes maze but not phase door.
I love that this is a "one way ticket to finish the beatdown," but I dont know how often I would use it as a player. I mean, normally if the bad guy is escaping he is going to some lair or to another plane. Not sure I really want to follow. I mean, I would want to, but probably not bad enough to actually do it unless the rest of the part had these things too.
The other problem is a metagame one--it can sure jack with DM plots. Lets say the big bad guy you are fighting is the local high priest of Pelor (he's just evil and is disguising himself). Most likely the DM wants you to fight this bad guy but doesnt necessarily want to reveal the plot point. If you can just follow him to his lair you could spoil the mystery early. It always makes us think twice to permit a magic item that ruins stories.
But back to the item. The best use of this, well the safest anyway, is to follow a mage who is using dimension door, but it is pretty hard to know that is what is being used.
I still like this item alot.
I was wondering, though: were you intending this item to apply to the special abilites of creatures or only to spells?
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You realize, of course, that conjuration (teleportation) includes maze but not phase door.
I love that this is a "one way ticket to finish the beatdown," but I dont know how often I would use it as a player. I mean, normally if the bad guy is escaping he is going to some lair or to another plane. Not sure I really want to follow. I mean, I would want to, but probably not bad enough to actually do it unless the rest of the part had these things too.
The other problem is a metagame one--it can sure jack with DM plots. Lets say the big bad guy you are fighting is the local high priest of Pelor (he's just evil and is disguising himself). Most likely the DM wants you to fight this bad guy but doesnt necessarily want to reveal the plot point. If you can just follow him to his lair you could spoil the mystery early. It always makes us think twice to permit a magic item that ruins stories.
But back to the item. The best use of this, well the safest anyway, is to follow a mage who is using dimension door, but it is pretty hard to know that is what is being used.
I still like this item alot.
I was wondering, though: were you intending this item to apply to the special abilites of creatures or only to spells?
The short answer is that yes, I was intending it to be able to apply to the special abilities of creatures as well as spells. That's the reason I used the somewhat ambiguous descriptor 'effect'. I supposed I could have said 'any spell or spell-like ability with the conjuration (teleportation) descriptor', but I was trying to keep the word limit down.
Of course, your remark about not necessarily wanting to follow them counts double when you're a single character who's just seen a marilith or the like teleport away!
As for the plot-smashing capabilities, I agree that it does present a new problem a GM would have to be aware of when crafting their plans, but there was no way I could avoid that and still build the idea I had, so I just had to go with it. It is at least preventable with the correct spells, though I can see an issue in mid-level play where the big bad has access to spells like dimension door and, say, a secret bolt-hole under the floor, but lacks the level of spells to ward said bolthole against teleportation.
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Key of vengeance
Aura faint necromancy; CL 5th Slot -; Price 8,000gp; Weight - lb. Description
This large skeleton keys fit comfortably in your hand, yet feels warm to the touch, and has a pronounced sharp tip. When thrust into the chest of a corpse,that is less then 1 day old, and turned as if unlocking a door, the corpse rises as a zombie under your command as per animate dead. It will stay this way and not suffer normal deterioration for a total of one week, and at the end of which the corpse reverts to its lifeless state.
Anytime during the week you may ask the zombie three questions which it will answer truthfully as per speak with dead. If at anytime the corpse is raised from the dead it will remember all activities that happened while the key was in it's chest. You may at deactivate these functions of a key at anytime simply by turning the key as if locking a door and then removing the key from the chest. A key will only function on one corpse per week.
Construction
Requirements Craft wondrous, animate dead,gentle repose,speak with dead; Cost 4,000 gp
Clark could you give me feed back on this one. I did not have it fully ready at the deadline and as such used another entry.
** spoiler omitted **
Clark could you give me feed back on this one. I did not have it fully ready at the deadline and as such used another entry.
Icky icky icky! I like though it majorly squicks me out ::chuckle:: Talk about your horrific wind up toy :P
Dedicated Voter Season 9
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I have realized having a two year old, all the wonderful magic items i could have come up with after watching countless hours of Disney and Nick cartoons.
I seriously considered items that would mimic those on the cartoons such as Dora the Explorer's map, Diego's backpack, Mickey Mouse's mouska tools, etc......
Ugh!!
** spoiler omitted **
Clark could you give me feed back on this one. I did not have it fully ready at the deadline and as such used another entry.
I am not Clark, but I'll give you my 2 cents for what it's worth...
you have a grammatical error in the second to the last sentence, nothing major but just enough to trip somebodies eye up and cause them to snap back for a moment. you use "anytime" early on in both the 4th and 5th sentences, you might want to consider changing the 5th sentence to remove it (perhaps to something like "If the corpse is ever raised..."), it would make it flow smoother when read.
As for the item itself, I think it is a nice item and would definatly consider using it in my home game. It has really nice flavor, (although I could see this as a little bit of a spell in a box type item, the "FX" as Clark calls them are very cool). I am unsure about the name though, key of vengance I expect to do something more vengeful... perhaps a more necromantic type name such as "key of the husk" or "Soul Key" or something along those lines.
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Here's mine, on which I totally missed the deadline:
Siege Horn
Aura strong evocation; CL 16th
Slot —; Price 115,000 gp; Weight 1 ton
This immense horn is the size of several men, carved whole from the tusk of some unidentifiable creature. The horn is typically mounted on a large cart, with a raised podium allowing access to the mouthpiece.
Three times per day, when the horn is sounded, it produces the effect of a sympathetic vibration for 10 rounds, with a range of 600'. This effect may be used to target any structure, freestanding or not. Skilled musicians may extract additional soundings with a DC 20 (+5 for each additional sounding) Perform (horn) check.
Construction Craft Wondrous Item, sympathetic vibration; Cost 57,500 gp
Key of vengeance
Aura faint necromancy; CL 5th Slot -; Price 8,000gp; Weight - lb. Description
This large skeleton keys fit comfortably in your hand, yet feels warm to the touch, and has a pronounced sharp tip. When thrust into the chest of a corpse,that is less then 1 day old, and turned as if unlocking a door, the corpse rises as a zombie under your command as per animate dead. It will stay this way and not suffer normal deterioration for a total of one week, and at the end of which the corpse reverts to its lifeless state.
Anytime during the week you may ask the zombie three questions which it will answer truthfully as per speak with dead. If at anytime the corpse is raised from the dead it will remember all activities that happened while the key was in it's chest. You may at deactivate these functions of a key at anytime simply by turning the key as if locking a door and then removing the key from the chest. A key will only function on one corpse per week.
Construction
Requirements Craft wondrous, animate dead,gentle repose,speak with dead; Cost 4,000 gp
Dont like the name. Doesnt deliver on its promise.
Good theme. Tight design to the theme. But in the end just some sexy FX layered over a pretty simple two power item.
I think the cost is off, but I dont have time to check it for sure. Not sure why gentle repose is in there. Some grammar and spelling issues but nothing major. I'd call them editorial issues.
I like this item. It has mojo. The FX have some spark and creativity. I wanted a bit more evil, though, for a key of vengeance. In the end, though, while you are sure going in the right direction, it isnt enough. Try to work more of the mechanics in. Do something interesting with the mechanics that also fit your theme. Dont just rely on spell effects.
This would be great in a book of magic items (with a different name). It would get discussion in Superstar, but not sure it makes the cut. But real good work and a real good start. Keep it up!
Here's mine, on which I totally missed the deadline:
Siege Horn
Aura strong evocation; CL 16th
Slot —; Price 115,000 gp; Weight 1 tonThis immense horn is the size of several men, carved whole from the tusk of some unidentifiable creature. The horn is typically mounted on a large cart, with a raised podium allowing access to the mouthpiece.
Three times per day, when the horn is sounded, it produces the effect of a sympathetic vibration for 10 rounds, with a range of 600'. This effect may be used to target any structure, freestanding or not. Skilled musicians may extract additional soundings with a DC 20 (+5 for each additional sounding) Perform (horn) check.
Construction Craft Wondrous Item, sympathetic vibration; Cost 57,500 gp
Spell in a can. (I have to be honest, I dont think I had ever read that spell before, though :) )
Good start. Good practical limit by making it so huge. Good theme. But a single power, just not enough there. I also dont know why you include non-freestanding structures. That goes beyond the spell effect. Plus, apparently the casting time is no longer 10 minutes, it just takes the blowing of the horn. So while you introduce some limitations due to its size, you also introduce some things that the spell itself does not do. That sure makes pricing a pain in the youknowwhat.
Plus, I think you fail to maximize what you could have here. The Pathfinder Beta rules have new bard rules for bardic performances. While you include a skill check to extract extra soundings, maybe you could have tied that mechanic to the as-of-yet-untapped bardic performance powers from the Beta rules. A Superstar milks the item for all they can get out of it to link it to the theme and to the design project itself.
That said, this is creative and interesting. It is relatively untapped--bardic instruments are overlooked in my view (though one makes the top 32, sorry couldnt resist the little sneak peek, he he). I like the practical limitation. Keep working at this. I think you see what I am going for. In fact, if you want, take this back to the drawing board. See if you can link somethign to the new bardic performance rules. And see if you can tighten up the effects. For instance, if you are going to add effects to non-freestanding structures, does that need any extra detail?
Nice start. Keep going.
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Spell in a can. (I have to be honest, I dont think I had ever read that spell before, though :) )
Yeah, I actually didn't realize there was a spell for doing this until after I already had the item concept!
Good start. Good practical limit by making it so huge. Good theme. But a single power, just not enough there. I also dont know why you include non-freestanding structures. That goes beyond the spell effect. Plus, apparently the casting time is no longer 10 minutes, it just takes the blowing of the horn. So while you introduce some limitations due to its size, you also introduce some things that the spell itself does not do. That sure makes pricing a pain in the youknowwhat.
Yeah, it does. The reason for the non-freestanding thing was that I wanted it to be used as a siege weapon, y'know, like the name claims. It would be kind of lame to have a siege weapon that couldn't target the walls of a fortress!
Plus, I think you fail to maximize what you could have here. The Pathfinder Beta rules have new bard rules for bardic performances. While you include a skill check to extract extra soundings, maybe you could have tied that mechanic to the as-of-yet-untapped bardic performance powers from the Beta rules.
Ooo... that's a good idea that didn't occur to me at all! I like!
Thanks for the feedback!
Ooo... that's a good idea that didn't occur to me at all! I like!
Thanks for the feedback!
That's why I'm the judge :)
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I'll bite; Clark, would you be so kind as to review any of my three items (earlier in this thread - Heartwood, Egg of Many Forms and Delusia's Mystical Abacus)? I have a feeling I know why my main entry didn't make it, and the same is likely here, but it would be nice to see a critique from you. Thanks, also, for taking the time to do this. This is really great feedback.
Eh, what the hey, here's my entry I didn't submit:
PATRON'S STONE AND FACTOR'S AMULET
Looks like you chose the right item to submit :)
Clark
Heartwood
Aura: Moderate Transmutation; CL 5th
Slot: - ; Price: 35,000 gp; Weight: -Description
Created by a sect of druids, heartwood is crafted from the heart of a dead treant, and usually gifted to rangers and druids, animals, humanoids and other woodland defenders. This unassuming lump of wood is placed over the chest of a willing recipient, melding into the creature's body. After one full round, the creature is transformed into a plant creature, with bark-like skin, leafy green hair and gleaming green eyes. The recipient of the heartwood gains the plant type and all traits associated with it. In addition, the creature gains a +5 natural armor bonus. Once per day, the transformed creature can change form into that of a large living tree or shrub, as per the spell tree shape, for up to 9 hours. The heartwood can be removed harmlessly by mental command, or forcibly by making a Heal check (DC 20). This deals 2d6 points of damage to the creature. The creature returns to normal one full round after removal of the heartwood.Construction
Requirements: Craft Wondrous Item, tree shape; Cost: 24,000 gp
YOu probably already know. But I'll tell you. Its "spell in a can." Plus, it doesnt really pique my curiousity enough. Its a perfectly fine item that would make its way into a book of items. It just didnt grab me. And as you can see there were a few druid type items that made the top 32 that had more mojo.
Egg of Many Forms
Spoiler:
Aura Faint to Moderate Conjuration; CL Type I 1st, Type II 2nd, Type III 3rd, Type IV 4th
Slot - Price Type I 1400 gp, Type II 2800 gp, Type III 4200 gp, Type IV 5600 gp; Weight -Description
This appears to be nothing more or less than an animal’s egg, perhaps from a bird or reptile. In reality, this magical egg can be used to summon forth a creature of the owner’s choice, depending on the egg of many forms’ type. Upon command, the egg’s owner must toss the egg, which shatters to reveal the creature called forth by the owner, as if just summoned by summon nature’s ally. There are four different eggs of many forms; each summons creatures from the summon nature’s ally (I, II, III, or IV; one creature at a time only) lists, save that it can never summon an elemental. The summoned creature is friendly to the egg’s owner, and remains for up to 7 rounds.Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, summon nature’s ally I, II, III or IV; Cost Type I 700 gp, Type II 1400 gp, Type III 2100 gp, Type IV 2800 gp
Pretty much the same thing. A good spell in a can item. Pretty straight forward summoning item, though. No attempt to tweak mechanics or break rules or do anything really interesting. It, too, is a solid item however and would clearly be in a book of items.
Delusia's Mystical Abacus
Aura Moderate Transmutation; CL 5th
Slot - ; Price 50,000 gp; Weight 1lb.Description
A finely tooled abacus of wood and iron, with inlaid precious stones and metals, Delusia’s mystical abacus is a powerful tool for any spellcaster. Through the abacus, a caster can apply one or more metamagic feats to a spell when cast by making rapid calculations on the abacus. Each additional spell level that the metamagic feat adds to the spell being cast costs 1 charge on the abacus, which can have up to 50 charges. Applying a single metamagic feat is a swift action, applying two metamagic feats is move action, while applying three metamagic feats is a full-round action (the modified spell is then cast on the next round). The abacus can be recharged by expending spell slots on a 1 charge per spell level exchange (a 2nd level spell gives the abacus 2 charges, 5 total spell levels recharges 5 charges, etc.). If Delusia’s mystical abacus ever drops to 0 charges, it becomes a non-magical, mundane abacus. Delusia’s mystical abacus cannot add more metamagic levels than it has charges.Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, any two Metamagic feats; Cost 25,000 gp
This is probably the best of the bunch. I hope you can see the difference. It starts to play with the rules and doesnt just give a spell effect. It layers metamagic on spells. That is cool. The item is a bit unclear. Does the ITEM have the metamagic feats in it? Or does it simply permit the caster to apply metamagic feats the caster already knows to the spells cast? That confused me. Plus, you are skirting close to blurring class distinction lines--since what you are really doing is giving memorized casters like wizards the ability to add metamagic on the fly, which is really the province of sorcerers. So that causes some concern. But I think this one is going in the right direction.
Had a few ideas, but only typed up one other than the one submitted... I discounted this because the utility seems limited and it's essentially just three spells in one item.
Looks like you made a good choice, too. That said, I like this item too. Nice work.
This, too me, is all FX covering up essentially a limited wish scroll that only lets you take on shape.
Not enough under the FX hood. Good FX is key, but you gotta put more under it.
Sam, sorry this was yours. You know how I feel about the Migrus. Though in a wierd way I guess I can see your design in this. Some of the same things that plagued the Migrus in hindsight also are present here. Its just that Migrus was SOOOOOO cool it overshadowed those things.
So we got some pretty cool "almost also-rans" right here in this thread from the guys that gave us the Twintone Flute and the Spellcatch Gauntlets that made the Top 32. Nice work! And good choices both times, it seems.
Clark, thanks for running through this thread. It is great to hear the thought process of the judges on items that may not have made it (for me your explanations here bring design lessons into sharper focus than for the Top 32 items).
And, on a personal level, it's nice to know one of my items (the poorly-named "Witching Whistle") worked well, even if the item I actually submitted didn't make it all the way!
Thanks again.
I liked the whistle alot. :)
Clark, please review my item.
Healer's Lute
Aura Moderate conjuration (healing); CL 7th
Slot --; Price 64,000 gp; Weight 1/2 lb
Description
Crafted from dark mahogany and inlaid with silver these enchanted musical instruments grant a +10 bonuses to perform checks made playing them. In addition, healer's lutes greatly enhance the healing prowess of those with the power of bardic music.
Each daily allotment of bardic music channeled through the lute allows the musician to heal a single creature a number of hit points equal to his perform check. Alternatively, rather than restore lost hit points the musician can channel an allotment of bardic music to cure disease, cure blindness/deafness, or remove curse. Use of any of the healing powers of the harp require at least five minutes of uninterrupted play.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, cure serious wounds, remove blindness/deafness, remove curse, remove disease; Cost 32,000 gp.
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DJ, you got some mojo going on with this. I like the FX you used. I like the combination thing. But in the end, this item is just kind of a grab bag. I dont think the theme is tight enough--I mean, shocking grasp to summon azer to sleep storm to hypnotic pattern? That is pretty random. I like the elemental theme. But I just think it does too much. I have to admit, I might have gotten disagreement from either or both of the other judges. Wolf could have liked this. It is limited and not overpowered. The fade and return the next day mechanic is good. I just think it is too much of a grab bag. That is generally bad design. But there is a lot of good stuff going on here too.
Why do I love the RPG Superstar contest? Because it always seems to lead to me getting published, and that is always a good thing! Can't wait for the next one to start.