The Angry Jack Cult


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Secretlyreplacedwith wrote:
I don't know which is more embarassing, the fact that one of my clones is slumming among Jacks looking for converts, or that he's doing such a pathetic job of it.

Oh, come on. We all know you secretly wish that you were a Jack so you could party all the time too. ;)


lynora-Jill wrote:
Oh, come on. We all know you'd rather saw open your skull and scoop out your brain with a rusty spoon than associate with we mere insects any day.

I fixed that for you.

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Jack Hammer wrote:
tulip wrote:
Why is Jack angry???

Someone stole his pony.

JUST KIDDIN', BOSS!

*Shakes angry fist at smartass lackey*


The One True Sebastian wrote:
You are all pathetic. Why don't you join a real cult and worship the glory that is me? Losers.

"We are Jacks! Not Losers!"

Still cranky afte rthe disappearance of his drinking bowl, the Man-TIger bolts past Lynora and Tulip. Roy-Jack leaps and knocks the One True Sebastian on his back.

"I'll take horse-lover outside, but my bowl had better be found before I come back."

Roy-Jack takes Sabastian by his neck, proceeds outside, and mauls him vigorously.


Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
The One True Sebastian wrote:
You are all pathetic. Why don't you join a real cult and worship the glory that is me? Losers.

"We are Jacks! Not Losers!"

Still cranky afte rthe disappearance of his drinking bowl, the Man-TIger bolts past Lynora and Tulip. Roy-Jack leaps and knocks the One True Sebastian on his back.

"I'll take horse-lover outside, but my bowl had better be found before I come back."

Roy-Jack takes Sabastian by his neck, proceeds outside, and mauls him vigorously.

"Oooh. That has got to hurt."

She shrugs and goes behind the bar. "It's a good thing that we keep spare bowls back here."

She sets the bowl down and pours cream and whiskey into it.
"That should make him feel better."


Callous Jack wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
tulip wrote:
Why is Jack angry???

Someone stole his pony.

JUST KIDDIN', BOSS!

*Shakes angry fist at smartass lackey*

See? That's why he's angry. He has to put up with us smartass lackeys. It's the price of fame.


Hey dudes and ladies, how's it going, I see its been busy!


Hi, Frat Jack. Beer? She slides him one of the PBRs that he prefers.

Hey, since I'm back here, anybody else need a drink?


lynora-Jill wrote:

Hi, Frat Jack. Beer? She slides him one of the PBRs that he prefers.

Hey, since I'm back here, anybody else need a drink?

Thanks! How 'bout a Dark & Stormy? And maybe five for yourself? ;)


Thanks LJ!

*gluglugluglugluglu...*


Jack Hammer wrote:
lynora-Jill wrote:


Hey, since I'm back here, anybody else need a drink?

Thanks! How 'bout a Dark & Stormy? And maybe five for yourself? ;)

Sure thing! Here you go. She mixes a Dark & Stormy for him and one for herself.

I doubt I'll make it to five though. I passed out after three last time. :)


lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
lynora-Jill wrote:


Hey, since I'm back here, anybody else need a drink?

Thanks! How 'bout a Dark & Stormy? And maybe five for yourself? ;)

Sure thing! Here you go. She mixes a Dark & Stormy for him and one for herself.

I doubt I'll make it to five though. I passed out after three last time. :)

:::Roy-Jack trots back inside.:::

"Hey, I hate to say this, but Sabastian taste pretty good. Hey, my bowl's back. With whiskey and creme! You guys are the greatest."

:::moves towards the bowls and lapses it vigorously.:::

"Off to find a sunbeam and a nap. Wake me at your own risk."

Roy-Jack doesn't know about the bowls behind the bar, so don't tell him.


I think it was another clone, actually. Look, go chase some 'rats' or something. And quit chasing those mouse toys around and hiding them when we come in.


"Hey! He stole those from us!"
"Please shut up and keep steering the airship."


Wakes up on sofa.
"Ooooh. Exactly how many Dark & Stormies did I drink?"

Scarab Sages

Make your family happy (and less likely to maim you in your sleep). Make tonight’s dinner something special, with a little help from Hungry Jack®.


Roy-Jack yawns wide and deep. He stretches on all fours and his bone crack loudly.

He yawns again and assume his human form. "I think someone put Ambien CR in my Whiskey and creme. I haven't slept like that in a long time."

He walks behind the bar counter and puts a pair of shorts.

"I'm heading for the pool. Anyone care to join me?"


Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:

Roy-Jack yawns wide and deep. He stretches on all fours and his bone crack loudly.

He yawns again and assume his human form. "I think someone put Ambien CR in my Whiskey and creme. I haven't slept like that in a long time."

He walks behind the bar counter and puts a pair of shorts.

"I'm heading for the pool. Anyone care to join me?"

"Pool? We have a pool?"

"Is it near that large toilet outside?"


lynora-Jill wrote:

Wakes up on sofa.

"Ooooh. Exactly how many Dark & Stormies did I drink?"

Wakes up with one of LJ's bras on his head, like in Weird Science

"All of them, I think."


Jack Hammer wrote:
lynora-Jill wrote:

Wakes up on sofa.

"Ooooh. Exactly how many Dark & Stormies did I drink?"

Wakes up with one of LJ's bras on his head, like in Weird Science

"All of them, I think."

"Eek!" She quickly crosses her arms over her chest as she realizes she isn't wearing a shirt and blushes a deep crimson.

"Please tell me there isn't a video."


lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
lynora-Jill wrote:

Wakes up on sofa.

"Ooooh. Exactly how many Dark & Stormies did I drink?"

Wakes up with one of LJ's bras on his head, like in Weird Science

"All of them, I think."

"Eek!" She quickly crosses her arms over her chest as she realizes she isn't wearing a shirt and blushes a deep crimson.

"Please tell me there isn't a video."

"Video? We'd never have a video camera going. Would we guys?"


lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
lynora-Jill wrote:

Wakes up on sofa.

"Ooooh. Exactly how many Dark & Stormies did I drink?"

Wakes up with one of LJ's bras on his head, like in Weird Science

"All of them, I think."

"Eek!" She quickly crosses her arms over her chest as she realizes she isn't wearing a shirt and blushes a deep crimson.

"Please tell me there isn't a video."

*Hides camera behind back* Of course not. You're being paranoid.


Jack Hammer wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:

Roy-Jack yawns wide and deep. He stretches on all fours and his bone crack loudly.

He yawns again and assume his human form. "I think someone put Ambien CR in my Whiskey and creme. I haven't slept like that in a long time."

He walks behind the bar counter and puts a pair of shorts.

"I'm heading for the pool. Anyone care to join me?"

"Pool? We have a pool?"

"Is it near that large toilet outside?"

"No, it's a real pool. I think Demolition Jack found it. By the way Lynora, nice dishes."


Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:


"No, it's a real pool. I think Demolition Jack found it. By the way Lynora, nice dishes."

"Please tell me you're talking about the actual dishes that we keep behind the bar," she says, still blushing.

"And can I please have my top back now?"

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
"No, it's a real pool. I think Demolition Jack found it.

Did he just blow up our yard and then fill it with water?


lynora-Jill wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:


"No, it's a real pool. I think Demolition Jack found it. By the way Lynora, nice dishes."

"Please tell me you're talking about the actual dishes that we keep behind the bar," she says, still blushing.

"And can I please have my top back now?"

"Uh..., Yes. Those dishes," he says mirthfully.


Callous Jack wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
"No, it's a real pool. I think Demolition Jack found it.
Did he just blow up our yard and then fill it with water?

"No, these's an actual swimming pool outside with a deck. And Demolition Jack said he found something at the bottom of it. How it came be, I don't knoW."


Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
Callous Jack wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
"No, it's a real pool. I think Demolition Jack found it.
Did he just blow up our yard and then fill it with water?
"No, these's an actual swimming pool outside with a deck. And Demolition Jack said he found something at the bottom of it. How it came be, I don't knoW."

"Is it made of porcelain, and does it have a big handle to pull?"

"It might be one of those giant Acme toilets. Not that I've ever used it that way."


Hey Dudes and Gals, did I mention the the Boss participated in one of the the now-not-so-secret-project?

He made an illo that reflects perfectly the Jacks nature -without illustrating the Jacks-

In a couple weeks you'll find out...

:D


Frat Jack wrote:

Hey Dudes and Gals, did I mention the the Boss participated in one of the the now-not-so-secret-project?

He made an illo that reflects perfectly the Jacks nature -without illustrating the Jacks-

In a couple weeks you'll find out...

:D

I'm waiting for the Jacks' line of minis. And a Dark & Stormy Knight logo. ;)


LJ snatches her top off of JH's head, and quickly puts it back on.

"That's great, Frat Jack. Sounds cool. I can't wait to see it."


lynora-Jill wrote:

LJ snatches her top off of JH's head, and quickly puts it back on.

"That's great, Frat Jack. Sounds cool. I can't wait to see it."

"Ow! I got ear burn!"

Liberty's Edge

I found a great new use for a Dark and Stormy!

Spoiler:
Dark and Stormy Brisket
3-3.5 lbs brisket
Rub2 1/2 tsp brown sugar
1 tsp curry powder
1/2 tsp ground cumn
1/4 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp nutmeg
1/4 tsp cloves
1/2 tsp chili powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp cayanne pepper
Sauce
1/4 cup lime juice
12 oz ginger beer
3/4 cup molasses
1/4 cup honey
1 cup dark rum
1-2 jalapenos, sliced
3-4 cloves of garlic, chopped
2 bay leaves
2 tsp liquid smoke

Score brisket on both sides and set aside. Combine ingredients and blend well. Rub all over brisket and let rest for 1-2 hours.
Combine ingredients for sauce in a saucepan, blend well and simmer until reduced by half. Reserve half for serving. Place brisket in a slow cooker or smoker with fat cap on top and brush with sauce. Brush with sauce every thirty minutes if desired. Turn once.
Cook for 4-5 hours, or until brisket becomes tender. Slice thinly across the grain and serve with remaining sauce.

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Frat Jack wrote:

Hey Dudes and Gals, did I mention the the Boss participated in one of the the now-not-so-secret-project?

He made an illo that reflects perfectly the Jacks nature -without illustrating the Jacks-

In a couple weeks you'll find out...

:D

Shameless pluggery...

;-)

Shadow Lodge

Callous Jack wrote:
Frat Jack wrote:

Hey Dudes and Gals, did I mention the the Boss participated in one of the the now-not-so-secret-project?

He made an illo that reflects perfectly the Jacks nature -without illustrating the Jacks-

In a couple weeks you'll find out...

:D

Shameless pluggery...

;-)

How about a little hint boss?


Jack Hammer wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
Callous Jack wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
"No, it's a real pool. I think Demolition Jack found it.
Did he just blow up our yard and then fill it with water?
"No, these's an actual swimming pool outside with a deck. And Demolition Jack said he found something at the bottom of it. How it came be, I don't knoW."

"Is it made of porcelain, and does it have a big handle to pull?"

"It might be one of those giant Acme toilets. Not that I've ever used it that way."

"Well, it's not a kitty-litter box. I would know. There's no sand and bit size bits of gravel in it."


Cultist of Jack wrote:

I found a great new use for a Dark and Stormy!

** spoiler omitted **

Nummy, nummy.


Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
Callous Jack wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
"No, it's a real pool. I think Demolition Jack found it.
Did he just blow up our yard and then fill it with water?
"No, these's an actual swimming pool outside with a deck. And Demolition Jack said he found something at the bottom of it. How it came be, I don't knoW."

"Is it made of porcelain, and does it have a big handle to pull?"

"It might be one of those giant Acme toilets. Not that I've ever used it that way."

"Well, it's not a kitty-litter box. I would know. There's no sand and bit size bits of gravel in it."

"Smells like a litter-box."


Jack Hammer wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
Callous Jack wrote:
Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
"No, it's a real pool. I think Demolition Jack found it.
Did he just blow up our yard and then fill it with water?
"No, these's an actual swimming pool outside with a deck. And Demolition Jack said he found something at the bottom of it. How it came be, I don't knoW."

"Is it made of porcelain, and does it have a big handle to pull?"

"It might be one of those giant Acme toilets. Not that I've ever used it that way."

"Well, it's not a kitty-litter box. I would know. There's no sand and bit size bits of gravel in it."
"Smells like a litter-box."

*Flies overhead, having emptied the litterbox as requested*

Scarab Sages

Bacon-Cheeseburger Potato Pie

Ingredients:
• 1 1/2 pounds extra­ lean ground beef
• 1/2 cup plain bread crumbs
• 1/4 cup finely chopped onion
• 1/4 cup Dickinson's® Tomato Ketchup
• 2 teaspoons prepared mustard
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 3 slices bacon
• 1 1/4 cups water
• 3 tablespoons butter
• 1/4 teaspoon garlic salt
• 3/4 cup milk
• 2 cups Hungry Jack® Mashed Potatoes, flakes
• 1 cup (4 oz.) shredded Cheddar cheese
• 1 medium tomato, chopped
• Chopped green onions

Preparation Directions:
1. HEAT oven to 375°F. Combine ground beef, bread crumbs, onion, ketchup, mustard and salt in medium bowl. Mix well. Press mixture in bottom and up sides of ungreased 9-inch pie pan. Bake 15 minutes.
2. COOK bacon until crisp. Drain on paper towel. Cool and crumble.
3. COMBINE water, butter and garlic salt in medium saucepan. Bring to a boil. Remove from heat. Add milk. With fork, stir in potato flakes. Stir in 1/2 cup cheese.
4. REMOVE partially baked beef crust from oven. Pour off any drippings. Spoon potato mixture evenly into crust. Return to oven. Bake an additional 10 to 15 minutes or until beef is thoroughly cooked and potatoes are heated.
5. REMOVE pie from oven. Top with tomato, remaining 1/2 cup cheese and crumbled bacon. Return to oven. Bake an additional 5 minutes or until cheese is melted. Remove from oven. Top with green onions. Let stand 10 minutes. Cut into wedges to serve.

Yield: 6 servings
Prep Time: 15 min
Cook Time: 35 min

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
NASCAR Jack wrote:
How about a little hint boss?

I'm not sure it's my place to do so but I think the illustration is a nod to the OTD section in general...

Liberty's Edge

At least give us a hint on where to look.


Callous Jack wrote:
NASCAR Jack wrote:
How about a little hint boss?
I'm not sure it's my place to do so but I think the illustration is a nod to the OTD section in general...

And the Jacks totally dominate the OTD. It's good to be the bosses.

Scarab Sages

Hungry Jack® Pancakes - YUM!


Hungry Jack wrote:
Hungry Jack® Pancakes - YUM!

Mmmm. Pancakes. Thanks, Hungry Jack. :)

Scarab Sages

Hungry Jack® is always here to help with delicious meals you and your family will enjoy any time of the day or night!

Liberty's Edge

How about a recipe for sausage and peppers omelets?


Got Milk?


Frat Jack wrote:
Got Milk?

Well, there's cream for Roy-Jack, but if there isn't any left for him you get to be the one to explain it to him...

Scarab Sages

Cultist of Jack wrote:
How about a recipe for sausage and peppers omelets?

Sorry, I'm more of a potato man. How's this instead....

Potato, Sausage and Egg Breakfast Casserole

Ingredients:
• 1 (12 oz.) package Johnsonville Original Breakfast Patties
• 1/2 cup chopped onion
• 1/2 cup chopped green pepper
• 1/2 cup chopped red pepper
• Crisco® Original No-Stick Cooking Spray
• 1 (4.9 oz.) package Hungry Jack® Four Cheese Potatoes
• 2 cups boiling water
• 2/3 cup milk
• 5 large eggs
• 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
TOPPING
• 1 cup Hungry Jack® Mashed Potatoes, Flakes
• 1/4 cup butter, melted
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 2 tablespoons chopped chives

Preparation Directions:
1. CRUMBLE and cook sausage in skillet over medium-low heat for 5 minutes. Add onion, green pepper and red pepper. Cook an additional 5 minutes.
2. HEAT oven to 400°F. Coat 9x9-inch baking pan with no-stick cooking spray.
3. PLACE potatoes and cheese packet in large bowl. Stir in boiling water. Whisk milk, eggs and garlic powder in medium bowl. Add to potatoes. Stir in sausage mixture. Pour into prepared pan.
4. COMBINE potato flakes, butter and salt with a fork until evenly moistened. Stir in chives. Sprinkle on top of potatoes.
5. BAKE for 30 to 35 minutes or until potatoes are tender and top is golden brown. Let stand 5 minutes before serving.
TIP To prepare the day ahead, follow directions until potatoes are in prepared pan. Cover and refrigerate overnight. Heat oven to 375°F. Stir together topping ingredients, then sprinkle over top of potatoes. Bake for 45 to 50 minutes or until potatoes are tender and top is golden brown. Let stand 5 minutes before serving.

Yield: 9 servings
Prep Time: 15 min
Cook Time: 30 min

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