The Angry Jack Cult


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Scarab Sages

Hungry Jack! It kicks serious ass!!!


I am here for the booze


There's plenty here. Drink up!


anybody got ice. I like my drinks on the rocks and without poodles. though poodles are very durable hakey sacks

Scarab Sages

Don't look at me, I just work the kitchen. Drink's will have to be your speciality.


Jack'n'Coke wrote:
anybody got ice. I like my drinks on the rocks and without poodles. though poodles are very durable hakey sacks

GRRRRRR!


Found the ice. Ok, so I got the bar.

Cockapoo wrote:
GRRRRRR!

ohh look cute little hackey sack. Anyone up for a game.

*places toe under cockapoo*


Jack'n'Coke wrote:

Found the ice. Ok, so I got the bar.

Cockapoo wrote:
GRRRRRR!

ohh look cute little hackey sack. Anyone up for a game.

*places toe under cockapoo*

YIPE! *Bites Jack 'n' Coke and runs off*


What cockapoo you don't want to be the hacky sack? There is a new squeeky chew toy in it for you. pulls out a squeeky toy and squeezes it *squeeeeeeeekkkkkk*


Jack'n'Coke wrote:
anybody got ice. I like my drinks on the rocks and without poodles. though poodles are very durable hakey sacks

A gleaming chrome retro-futuristic robot zips up to J&C

*BEEP*

I can make you any one of 6,587 different mixed drinks sir.


Acme Robot wrote:


A gleaming chrome retro-futuristic robot zips up to J&C

*BEEP*

I can make you any one of 6,587 different mixed drinks sir.

I'll take 2 of each, eh how much is that gonna cost? oh whatever put it on the poodle's bill.


Nasty Pajamas wrote:

Can someone post a short synopsis about what "The Angry Jack Cult" is all about?

Why is he angry? What is the charter of this cult?

Do members get discount's on Paizo items?

Jack´s avatar looks angry. I heard our boss has a serious tight-shoes issue, hence the "callous" name. I bet that makes him angry.

We don't get spcial discount, althought we should since we are the coolest cult on the Paizo Boards


Jack'n'Coke wrote:
I'll take 2 of each, eh how much is that gonna cost? oh whatever put it on the poodle's bill.

*BEEP*

I will attempt to comply, but I am unsure our alcohol stocks can withstand 13,174 drinks. Also, the poodles have no credit, as they are notorious deadbeats ...


Jack'n'Coke wrote:
What cockapoo you don't want to be the hacky sack? There is a new squeeky chew toy in it for you. pulls out a squeeky toy and squeezes it *squeeeeeeeekkkkkk*

must... resist...squeaky...toys.


Acme Robot wrote:
Jack'n'Coke wrote:
I'll take 2 of each, eh how much is that gonna cost? oh whatever put it on the poodle's bill.

*BEEP*

I will attempt to comply, but I am unsure our alcohol stocks can withstand 13,174 drinks. Also, the poodles have no credit, as they are notorious deadbeats ...

Hey, it's not our fault nobody will accept our poodle pounds.


new squeeky toy for the cockapoo *squeeeeeeeekkk* who's a good doggie. rubs right behind cockapoo's ears


Jack'n'Coke wrote:
new squeeky toy for the cockapoo *squeeeeeeeekkk* who's a good doggie. rubs right behind cockapoo's ears

*licks Jack'n'Coke* YAP!


Who's up for a game of hackapoo sack
Anyone not cockapoo

Spoiler:

hacky sack with cockapoo as the sack

come on, anybody Jack'n Ape, Roy-Jack, Frat Jack


Jack'n'Coke wrote:

Who's up for a game of hackapoo sack

Anyone not cockapoo
** spoiler omitted **
come on, anybody Jack'n Ape, Roy-Jack, Frat Jack

*sigh* I guess I'll do anything for a squeaky toy.


A new Jack enters the Clubhouse.

"General Debauchery at your service gentlemen, General Jack Debauchery. I hear you serve a great Dark & Stormy 'round these parts."

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
General Debauchery wrote:

A new Jack enters the Clubhouse.

"General Debauchery at your service gentlemen, General Jack Debauchery. I hear you serve a great Dark & Stormy 'round these parts."

Welcome! Can Corporal Punishment and Major Disaster be far behind?

Frat Jack wrote:


Jack´s avatar looks angry. I heard our boss has a serious tight-shoes issue, hence the "callous" name. I bet that makes him angry.

Speaking of shoes...

*kicks FratJack in the shins*

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Jack'n'Coke wrote:

Who's up for a game of hackapoo sack

Anyone not cockapoo
** spoiler omitted **
come on, anybody Jack'n Ape, Roy-Jack, Frat Jack

I prefer punting poodles over the clubhouse.


Wow, this place is geting more military personel... I home some "Janes" join soon

*Passes a frosty Dark and Stormy to the General*


Callous Jack wrote:

Speaking of shoes...
*kicks FratJack in the shins*

Also, the boss is very flexible... for an angy golem....ouch...


There is a sound of feminine giggling from LJ's room, and shortly after she comes out, slightly tipsy, and grabs two bottles of tequila before heading back.


*Follows LJ silently into the room*

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Frat Jack wrote:
*Follows LJ silently into the room*

lol

Make a Stealth check!


Callous Jack wrote:
General Debauchery wrote:

A new Jack enters the Clubhouse.

"General Debauchery at your service gentlemen, General Jack Debauchery. I hear you serve a great Dark & Stormy 'round these parts."

Welcome! Can Corporal Punishment and Major Disaster be far behind?

My cohort, General Mayhem may bring them with him when he shows up.


Frat Jack wrote:
*Follows LJ silently into the room*

*Is challenged to a drinking contest by a group of half-drunk nymphs.*


Frat Jack wrote:

Wow, this place is geting more military personel... I home some "Janes" join soon

*Passes a frosty Dark and Stormy to the General*

"Ahhh...most excellent. Thank you."


celestial nymph wrote:
Frat Jack wrote:
*Follows LJ silently into the room*
*Is challenged to a drinking contest by a group of half-drunk nymphs.*

JH waits outside, for when Frat passes out the LJ and the nymphs will need a sober golem. At least semi-sober.


Jack Hammer wrote:
celestial nymph wrote:
Frat Jack wrote:
*Follows LJ silently into the room*
*Is challenged to a drinking contest by a group of half-drunk nymphs.*
JH waits outside, for when Frat passes out the LJ and the nymphs will need a sober golem. At least semi-sober.

Good luck with that, beign a Golem without Con score makes me quite good at handling alcohol...

*Walks into the drinking contest with a kinky smile and with colorful ladies drinks in both hands*


Frat Jack wrote:

Good luck with that, beign a Golem without Con score makes me quite good at handling alcohol...

*Walks into the drinking contest with a kinky smile and with colorful ladies drinks in both hands*

"So you have to drink as much as all of us combined," they giggle.


celestial nymph wrote:
Frat Jack wrote:

Good luck with that, beign a Golem without Con score makes me quite good at handling alcohol...

*Walks into the drinking contest with a kinky smile and with colorful ladies drinks in both hands*

"So you have to drink as much as all of us combined," they giggle.

<Scuttles through collecting empty bottles for recycling.>

To Frat Jack:
You have read ancient greek and roman myths, right? Being around intoxicated fey isn't the safest place to be. Still, you're a golem - they can probably put you back together again once everyone sobers up, or at least they can if they can find all the pieces.
<Scuttles out before the party can get any wilder and more dangerous.>

Liberty's Edge

Did somebody say beer? Where's a poodle, it's time for the punting contest.


celestial nymph wrote:
Frat Jack wrote:

Good luck with that, beign a Golem without Con score makes me quite good at handling alcohol...

*Walks into the drinking contest with a kinky smile and with colorful ladies drinks in both hands*

"So you have to drink as much as all of us combined," they giggle.

No problem ladies!

*blushes*


LJ starts pouring out the shots of tequila, while the other girls gather round. One for each of them, and four for Frat Jack.


lynora-Jill wrote:
LJ starts pouring out the shots of tequila, while the other girls gather round. One for each of them, and four for Frat Jack.

JH heads to Frat's room.

"Silly Frat. He forgot to freshen his cologne. Guess I'm free to borrow it again."

JH heads back to the main room, the fresh smell of Brut Plus dabbed sparingly but effectively, and gets a fresh supply of Dark & Stormy t-shirts ready.

"Rookies..."


Angry Jack Cult House....you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy...


Obi-Jack wrote:
Angry Jack Cult House....you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy...

...and we kinda like it that way.


Why do you think I'm here, young Jack?


Obi-Jack wrote:
Why do you think I'm here, young Jack?

Don't have a clue. You better not be here to steal our beer!


Obi-Jack wrote:
Angry Jack Cult House....you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy...

We should put that on business cards...


"Hey, can someone bring us some more tequila? We're all out, and *hic* I don't think I can carry the bottles without spilling." *giggle* "Frat Jack already passed out. He never makes it past the second bottle of tequila."


I heard that you serve a mean Dark & Stormy here...


lynora-Jill wrote:
"Hey, can someone bring us some more tequila? We're all out, and *hic* I don't think I can carry the bottles without spilling." *giggle* "Frat Jack already passed out. He never makes it past the second bottle of tequila."

Here I come ladies! *carries a few bottles of tequila with him and a deck of cards* BTW, do any of you girls know how to play strip poker?


Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
lynora-Jill wrote:
"Hey, can someone bring us some more tequila? We're all out, and *hic* I don't think I can carry the bottles without spilling." *giggle* "Frat Jack already passed out. He never makes it past the second bottle of tequila."
Here I come ladies! *carries a few bottles of tequila with him and a deck of cards* BTW, do any of you girls know how to play strip poker?

*round of giggles* "Sounds fun. Deal us in."


~You don't need to play poker to strip~


Obi-Jack wrote:
~You don't need to play poker to strip~

"Doesh that mean you want to play?" *giggle*


~That's not the Jack you're looking for~

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