The Angry Jack Cult


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pops in all this talk of rope and leather has me interested


*Shoots*
No gathering of essence for you! That's cold iron/silver, so take that! Bind to thread!


Demon Lord of Tribbles wrote:
pops in all this talk of rope and leather has me interested

*sigh* It would. Could you please get rid of all of these excess tribbles?


a voice carries on the winds:
Rawk! Jacks! Stop the Demonic Tribble!


Be careful. I have reason to believe that he is trying to do more than simply undo the Archpope's spells. Be wary!


Alderyk, King of the Fallarin wrote:

a voice carries on the winds:

Rawk! Jacks! Stop the Demonic Tribble!

*starts stomping on tribbles* There's gotta be a better way than squishing them. More are popping up than what I can kill *squish*


Wait, what? Why are we supposed to stop the tribble lord?
*casts planar binding*
That should hold until we can get some explanations. And a promise to get rid of the tribbles in this thread.


Tribble Lord, why are you grabbing Thread Essence? There is no reason....
*The Sending message spoke as KC went back to the Untitled to await the Tribble*


Kobold Cleaver wrote:
Be careful. I have reason to believe that he is trying to do more than simply undo the Archpope's spells. Be wary!

Wait, he is screwing with the Megapope?


lynora-Jill wrote:

Wait, what? Why are we supposed to stop the tribble lord?

*casts planar binding*
That should hold until we can get some explanations. And a promise to get rid of the tribbles in this thread.

Heh..12 HD nope , nice try........ vanishes in a could of tribbles


Crap. KC has done something very risky. He sacrificed all his power to trap the Great Tribble, and the Tribble Lord may be weakened, but...he can still beat Kobold Cleaver.

Scarab Sages

I promised I'd come up with a tribble recipe...

Cheesy Tribbleburger Pie

Ingredients:
MEAT LAYER
• Crisco® Original No-Stick Cooking Spray
• 1 pound lean tribble meat
• 1/4 cup Hungry Jack® Buttermilk Complete Pancake & Waffle Mix (Just Add Water)
• 1/4 cup onion, chopped
• 1/4 cup Dickinson's® Tomato Ketchup
• 1/8 teaspoon salt
• 1/8 teaspoon pepper
• 1 large egg, slightly beaten

TOPPING
• 1 1/4 cups (5 oz.) shredded Cheddar or American cheese
• 1 cup Hungry Jack® Buttermilk Complete Pancake & Waffle Mix (Just Add Water)
• 2/3 cup milk
• 1 tablespoon Crisco® Pure Vegetable Oil
OR Crisco® Pure Canola Oil
• 1 large egg, slightly beaten
• Dill pickle slices (optional)

Preparation Directions:
1. HEAT oven to 375°F. Spray a 9-inch pie pan with no-stick cooking spray. Combine tribble meat, 1/4 cup pancake mix, onion, ketchup, salt, pepper and egg in a medium bowl. Mix well. Press into prepared pie pan.
2. SPRINKLE 1 cup cheese over tribble meat. Combine 1 cup pancake mix, milk, oil, and egg in a small bowl. Stir until batter is smooth. Pour mixture over tribble meat and cheese. Sprinkle with remaining 1/4 cup cheese.
3. BAKE 35 to 40 minutes or until topping is golden brown and tribble meat mixture is thoroughly cooked. Let stand 5 minutes before serving. Serve with additional ketchup and dill pickle slices, if desired.

Yield: 6 servings
Prep Time: 14 min
Cook Time: 35 min


*Eyes widen*
JACKS!!! The Tribble Lord is going to destroy Kobold Cleaver! He has teh phylactery! We have to help him!
*Attempts to get out of his plant bed, but is too weak*
HELP HIM!!!!


Wait...the Tribble Lord will spare him. But, he is drawing on the phylactery's power, and KC has no other source of strength at the moment.


*Flies in*
Hmm. Dis ain't good. Mah neaphew's gonnna dah fer REAL if dis keeps up.


Yep. Dis means an excursion. TO DA LAYER OF TRIBBLES AN' CREEPAH KINKAH...uhh...*Ahem* ADULT ENTERTAINMENT!!!
After dese messages.


Can I com--
*Is shushed as Pepsi Commercial begins*


nah I do not want the kobold, you have have him as a gesture of friendship I mean he done sooooooo much for me.....Oh yeah your'll have to put him back together and I ummm heh improved him a bit


For all he has done for me I will return KC's soul to a living body, an't I nice

Places the soul in a Fiendish, half tribble body

And the supper nice thing was this body will live as long as I am , See I like to be helpful


Demon Lord of Tribbles wrote:
pops back in to say...I would have left strippers but no one seems to like strippers...mortals confuse me sometimes

I like strippers. I like when they sunbathe.


You will just have to stop by the layer some time, the nymphs will gobble you up...eh well I'll tell them not to but you'll like em


I say, has this fellow even met any of the Jacks?

The Exchange

Jester walks into thread looking barely animate....walks directly to table and places case of Heineken on the main table, along with a bag.

Spoiler:
Bag contains a small blue crystal


The thieves brought us beer, eh? Sees that it's Dutch and not Belgian. I think I'll pour this out in the compost heap...just in case...and take this crystal to the Colonel's wizard friend, so that he can deal with it.

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Very Tempermental PlantJack wrote:

*Eyes widen*

JACKS!!! The Tribble Lord is going to destroy Kobold Cleaver! He has teh phylactery! We have to help him!
*Attempts to get out of his plant bed, but is too weak*
HELP HIM!!!!

Wait, is KC dead? Why does he have a phylactery?


Callous Jack wrote:
Wait, is KC dead?

Er...uh...no...


Crimson Jester, what's wrong? You don't look so good. Umm, is he an ally or an enemy? I've lost track. If he's an ally I'll gladly provide some healing.


Good evening, CJ ol boy. Didn't we have this conversation recently? I believe he revealed that he is a lich...most unpleasant.

And my dear madam, the thieves are definitely not allies...pestiferous things...they are Up-to-Something.


Panama Jack wrote:

Good evening, CJ ol boy. Didn't we have this conversation recently? I believe he revealed that he is a lich...most unpleasant.

And my dear madam, the thieves are definitely not allies...pestiferous things...the are Up-to-Something.

Okay, thanks for the clarification. Sorry Crimson Jester. I can't help you. Not without substantial monetary reward. Shoes don't buy themselves, you know, and a cleric need never be low on cash.


Out in the garden, the ape falls asleep. As his muscles relax, the poodles are able to escape from his embrace...to the extent that their poor little bodies are capable of movement.

The Exchange

walks around in a small circle making clicking and whirring sounds ~


Crimson Jester wrote:
walks around in a small circle making clicking and whirring sounds ~

Hey, boss, it looks like you're not looking very good. Wait, if he's crazy, then the position of guild leader passes to me until he's sane! Woohoo!


I believe my fellows have ways of returning him to sanity...with the happy side-effect of rendering him into Crimson Jack!

The Exchange

Whirrrr Click

Whiiirrr Click....

10

The Exchange

whirr click

9

The Exchange

8


The ape, sensing danger, awakens, rushes into the house, grabs the Crimson Jester who appears to be a time bomb, rushes out of the house, and hurls him into the old Frog Pond that the Borg now run.

SPLOSH!
Woo-HOO!


The skull speaks.
An effigy. I can't do anything in this form, as the damned tribble has altered my body into his own servant. However, it seems to contain a bomb, so I'd get it out of here.
Err, I need some power to cut the Thief off from the Untitled.


What will you do in exchange for help, Kobold Spirit?


Protect the crystal! It is a ward!


Jarl of the Kitten Vikings wrote:
Protect the crystal! It is a ward!

Oh &^%$! *Runs to the pond and retrieves the crystal.*


I say, why are we trusting KC's judgment in this matter? When have the thieves ever done a us a good turn?


Panama Jack wrote:
I say, why are we trusting KC's judgment in this matter? When have the thieves ever done a us a good turn?

You might be right. However, I just have a feeling about this that I can't explain.


heh oh that bomb....heh well about that.... I left it in a few places...in neckless and bottles .....I would say it made a mess...


Panama Jack wrote:
I say, why are we trusting KC's judgment in this matter? When have the thieves ever done a us a good turn?

We are no friend of KC. But, it is too late. The crystals are your only hope, for it comes....

The Exchange

crystal glows bright blue


Crimson Jester wrote:
crystal glows bright blue

Thank the Board. I had feared my boost wouldn't work.


Crimson Jester wrote:
crystal glows bright blue

Is blue good or bad?


Jack Hammer wrote:
Crimson Jester wrote:
crystal glows bright blue
Is blue good or bad?

Good. I only hope it works.


heh ....ya know i let him go right...he has been free for hours now....he could have entered his old body or the hansom new one at any point...sigh some people

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