The Angry Jack Cult


Off-Topic Discussions

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Lord Fyre wrote:
Bunny the Intern wrote:
Lord Fyre wrote:
Eekster Buhnay wrote:
{hops in} Would anyone care for a Slaadbury Creme Egg?
Does anyone else think that this would be a better avatar for Eekster Buhnay?
But where would that leave me?
For you, I would go with ... this.

me likey! But are you sure they don't have something more comfortable? I would feel like a spinster in a nun's habit in that. ;)


Jack Hammer wrote:
Dumb Hippie wrote:
Slaadbury Creme Eggs are cruel and inhumane to chickens!

*punts Dumb Hippie*

Get back to the garden and grow us some hops! We're making our own brand of brew!

I have a tofu beer you could try?


Dumb Hippie wrote:
I have a tofu beer you could try?

slaps the dumb hippie


Wait, isn't beer already vegetarian?


Captain Jack wrote:
Wait, isn't beer already vegetarian?

Bacon Beer sure ain't. Yum

Liberty's Edge

Mmmmmmmm.... bacon beer.


Captain Jack wrote:
Wait, isn't beer already vegetarian?

slaps Captain Jack


Stabs the brewmaster

I thought we got rid of all the zombies when we broke the Aztec curse.


Captain Jack wrote:

Stabs the brewmaster

I thought we got rid of all the zombies when we broke the Aztec curse.

I tend to show up when people insult beer.


It wasna insult ta beer. It's na like I said it was vegan.


Beer and raw steak. Can't beat that combination.

Just saying...

Scarab Sages

Strawberry and Banana-Nut Wedges

Ingredients:
• 1 tablespoon Smucker's® Squeeze Strawberry Fruit Spread
• 1 tablespoon Jif® Creamy Peanut Butter
• 1 teaspoon Hungry Jack® Microwave Ready Regular Syrup
• 1 Mission® Flour Tortilla, soft taco size
• 1/2 medium banana, cut into 1/4-inch slices
• 1 tablespoon chopped peanuts
• Ground cinnamon

Preparation Directions:
1. COMBINE fruit spread, peanut butter and syrup. Spread evenly on tortilla to within 1/2-inch of edge.
2. PLACE banana slices and chopped peanuts on half of peanut butter mixture.
3. FOLD in half. Sprinkle with cinnamon. Cut into 4 wedges and serve.

Yield: 1 serving
Prep Time: 5 min


Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:

Beer and raw steak. Can't beat that combination.

Just saying...

*drinks a cold beer and eats a steak in the raw*


Tofu beer is good for you and then you don't damage the earth and kill baby seals with your evil corporate beer!

*dumps evil beer*


Dumb Hippie wrote:

Tofu beer is good for you and then you don't damage the earth and kill baby seals with your evil corporate beer!

*dumps evil beer*

Alcohol abuse!

*pummels evil hippie and mops up spilt beer with her hair*

Liberty's Edge

Jack Hammer wrote:
Dumb Hippie wrote:

Tofu beer is good for you and then you don't damage the earth and kill baby seals with your evil corporate beer!

*dumps evil beer*

Alcohol abuse!

*pummels evil hippie and mops up spilt beer with her hair*

Quick, wring out the hair and then get the jackapult.


Cultist of Jack wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Dumb Hippie wrote:

Tofu beer is good for you and then you don't damage the earth and kill baby seals with your evil corporate beer!

*dumps evil beer*

Alcohol abuse!

*pummels evil hippie and mops up spilt beer with her hair*

Quick, wring out the hair and then get the jackapult.

Nothing makes me happier than jackapulting hippies. Though I must say jackapulting peasants comes in at a close second.


Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Cultist of Jack wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Dumb Hippie wrote:

Tofu beer is good for you and then you don't damage the earth and kill baby seals with your evil corporate beer!

*dumps evil beer*

Alcohol abuse!

*pummels evil hippie and mops up spilt beer with her hair*

Quick, wring out the hair and then get the jackapult.
Nothing makes me happier than jackapulting hippies. Though I must say jackapulting peasants comes in at a close second.

The bad thing about jackapulting hippies is an hour later you want to jackapult another. On second thought, that's not really a bad thing.

Should we detox her first, so she realizes what's going on?


Jack Hammer wrote:
Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Cultist of Jack wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Dumb Hippie wrote:

Tofu beer is good for you and then you don't damage the earth and kill baby seals with your evil corporate beer!

*dumps evil beer*

Alcohol abuse!

*pummels evil hippie and mops up spilt beer with her hair*

Quick, wring out the hair and then get the jackapult.
Nothing makes me happier than jackapulting hippies. Though I must say jackapulting peasants comes in at a close second.

The bad thing about jackapulting hippies is an hour later you want to jackapult another. On second thought, that's not really a bad thing.

Should we detox her first, so she realizes what's going on?

We can do that. It'll make the death screams more entertaining.


Hope! Change! FREEEEEEDOM!

Liberty's Edge

Any way we can bind and gag her before we jackapult her?


Cultist of Jack wrote:
Any way we can bind and gag her before we jackapult her?

I can maul her like a certain stage magician and make her cries.

The Exchange

Bin Laden is dead. Dark and Stormies are on me!


Angel of Violence wrote:
Bin Laden is dead. Dark and Stormies are on me!

Carries in a crate of Vodka and several Gallons of Sunny D

Huzzah! Time for a party. Where are the naked Nymphs?

Scarab Sages

Some celebratory food...

Baked Pork Chops with Yams and Apple

Ingredients:
• 1/2 cup Hungry Jack® Microwave Ready Regular Syrup
• 1 teaspoon minced garlic
OR or 1 small garlic clove, peeled and minced
• 1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 tablespoon freshly ground black pepper
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1 cup chicken stock or broth
• 2 tablespoons Crisco® Pure Vegetable Oil
• 4 boneless loin pork chops, 1 1/2 inches thick
• 3 medium yams or sweet potatoes, peeled and cut into 1-inch cubes
• 2 Granny Smith apples, cored, quartered and cut into 1-inch slices
• Parsley for garnish (optional)

Preparation Directions:
1. HEAT oven to 375°F. Combine maple syrup, garlic, ginger, salt, pepper, cinnamon and chicken stock; mix well. Line a roasting pan with aluminum foil.
2. HEAT oil in large skillet over medium-high heat. Brown pork chops on both sides. Remove from pan. Place chops in roasting pan.
3. ADD yams and apples. Pour maple syrup mixture over ingredients in pan.
4. BAKE, uncovered, 25 minutes. Remove pan from oven. Turn chops, yams and apples gently with spatula. Return to oven.
5. BAKE an additional 10 minutes or until apples and potatoes are soft and pork is no longer pink in center. Spoon apples and sweet potatoes onto serving platter and cover loosely. Pour remaining sauce into medium saucepan and simmer to reduce for 5 minutes. Pour over pork chops, sweet potatoes and apples. Serve.

Yield: 4 servings
Prep Time: 25 min
Cook Time: 35 min


Do you have anything with bacon?


testing testing, one two three SMURF!

Yup, still got it.


Was the Smurf broadcasting system broken and I missed it?

Scarab Sages

Hungry Jack® has everything you need to make breakfast the best part of your family's morning. Here you'll find great pancake, waffle and specialty breakfast recipes. Make breakfast time family time – with Hungry Jack®!


Maybe you could come by and cook breakfast for me tomorrow Hungry Jack.


Captain Jack wrote:
Do you have anything with bacon?

Smurf bacon?


Where's the recipe for Hungry Jack birthday cake?!!!!

If you expect us to bake you a birthday cake for your special day it could get...interesting.

Cheers, brother!

*pours a round of birthday shots*


Look! A flock of turtles!

Liberty's Edge

Caramel chocolate turtles. NOM!

Scarab Sages

Hungry Jack® has everything you need to make breakfast the best part of your family's morning. Here you'll find great pancake, waffle and specialty breakfast recipes. Make breakfast time family time – with Hungry Jack®!

Whether you like the convenience of our "Just Add Water" products or prefer to add in your own milk, oil, and eggs. There's a Hungry Jack® mix for you.


I'm a Jack and I'm angry.

Sovereign Court

Jack Hammer wrote:
I'm a Jack and I'm angry.

What are you going to do about it?


I recommend punting Poodles. It's a great stress reliever. Where's Courtfool when you need him?


Drink beer and play Peasant/Poodle Checkers. Those poodles are always jumping the peasants, and the peasants always want to be kinged.

The Exchange

Did someone say food??

Sovereign Court

Jack Hammer wrote:
Drink beer and play Peasant/Poodle Checkers. Those poodles are always jumping the peasants, and the peasants always want to be kinged.

Needs more violence...


Callous Jack wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Drink beer and play Peasant/Poodle Checkers. Those poodles are always jumping the peasants, and the peasants always want to be kinged.
Needs more violence...

You rang?

Dark Archive

Jack IT!


Officer Threadjack wrote:
Jack IT!

I say, dear chap, please don't go about stealing my good name.

Liberty's Edge

Threadjack wrote:
Officer Threadjack wrote:
Jack IT!
I say, dear chap, please don't go about stealing my good name.

Use it and abuse it!

Silver Crusade

You guys are all jacked!


~100 bottles of beer on the wall. 100 bottles of beer on the wall. Drink one down, and hold in your pee. 99 bottles of beer for me!~

Liberty's Edge

So when are we going to start building New New Jack City?


Cultist of Jack wrote:
So when are we going to start building New New Jack City?

Build? Don't we just move into a city and they rename it in our honor?

Scarab Sages

Hungry Jack® has been feeding families like yours for nearly 70 years. From the launch of Hungry Jack Mashed Potatoes in 1967 to the innovation of the reheatable microwavable Hungry Jack Syrup bottle in 1994, Hungry Jack has been gathering families around the table for good times, great food and that delicious Hungry Jack taste. That's why everybody’s happy when it's Hungry Jack™!

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