The Angry Jack Cult


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Dark Archive

I heard that Snooki is a nun in training who does the show so she can better understand sinners.

Spoiler:
Seriously, they did an episode of CSI Miami about it, only it was fake Snooki, it was fake Situation. Fake Snooki had a PhD in robotics from MIT.


Ah, I see my evil minions have already began to infiltrate. Keep up the good work Snooki.

Scarab Sages

Your family is the most important thing to our family. So make tonight’s meal special – make it a Hungry Jack® night! Your family will thank you for it, and so will ours.

Liberty's Edge

I don't know that my family would enjoy eating Hungry Jack. Too much metal and not enough meat.

Scarab Sages

Hungry Jack® Products are always crowd pleasers!


Hungry Jack wrote:

Hungry Jack® Products are always crowd pleasers!

Certainly better than the Hungry Jack® byproducts. Did you smell what he did to the bathroom?! The robots won't even go in there!

Time to round up some peasants.


Jack Hammer wrote:
Time to round up some peasants.

Agreed. The Jack-a-pult is getting cob webs on it.

Scarab Sages

Jack Hammer wrote:
Hungry Jack wrote:

Hungry Jack® Products are always crowd pleasers!

Certainly better than the Hungry Jack® byproducts. Did you smell what he did to the bathroom?! The robots won't even go in there!

Time to round up some peasants.

Hungry Jack®'s breakfast did not agree with him yesterday morning. Hungry Jack® suspects someone may have been trying to secretly poison him by switching out his normal pancakes for something from those Bisquick® bastards.

Dark Archive

Jack Hammer wrote:
Hungry Jack wrote:

Hungry Jack® Products are always crowd pleasers!

Certainly better than the Hungry Jack® byproducts. Did you smell what he did to the bathroom?! The robots won't even go in there!

Time to round up some peasants.

Maybe a few drones could help as well.

Dark Archive Bella Sara Charter Superscriber

Losers.

Scarab Sages

Sebastian wrote:
Losers.

Hungry Jack® wonders if, perhaps, the pony is simply jealous because his own cult never lasted very long.


Hungry Jack wrote:
Sebastian wrote:
Losers.
Hungry Jack® wonders if, perhaps, the pony is simply jealous because his own cult never lasted very long.

Mmmmm....pony burgers and pancakes


Sebastian wrote:
Losers.

Ah, the green eyed monster shows its face again.


Sebastian wrote:
Losers.

Hey, is it true that you horses are hung like a horse?

*throws up under a barstool*


Snooki wrote:
Sebastian wrote:
Losers.

Hey, is it true that you horses are hung like a horse?

*throws up under a barstool*

Cool! We might get to see a donkey, er horsey show!

Liberty's Edge

Sebastian and Snooki is a show I don't want to see.


My standards are pretty low, and even I am sickened by the thought.

*throws up in Snooki's hair.*

Scarab Sages

Hungry Jack® has been feeding families like yours for nearly 70 years. From the launch of Hungry Jack Mashed Potatoes in 1967 to the innovation of the reheatable microwavable Hungry Jack Syrup bottle in 1994, Hungry Jack has been gathering families around the table for good times, great food and that delicious Hungry Jack taste. That's why everybody’s happy when it's Hungry Jack™!


Did somebody order a stripper?

*puts on funky music*


"Oookay...this is new....what the hell...."

*sits down to watch the show*


I heard zis waz ze place to come and jack. I zee now that I was right.

*turns on German Electronica*

Schprockets!


lynora-Jill wrote:

"Oookay...this is new....what the hell...."

*sits down to watch the show*

I'll tell you what: I'll do a little dance if you help me bury this body.


Done! I've got a nice spot under the foundation of the new studio we're building. ;)


Stride into the clubhouse and finds a good place to nap for the evening

Might as well watch the show.


A studio?

No wonder we're Angry Jacks.

We need a secret lab, weapons locker, new garage, smoke house, or better yet a brew house.


Jack Hammer wrote:

A studio?

No wonder we're Angry Jacks.

We need a secret lab, weapons locker, new garage, smoke house, or better yet a brew house.

Sweetheart, in case you forgot, the studio is how we afford all of that stuff.

Oh, and the architect want you to please make up your minds on the design for the brew house or it'll never get built. ;P

Scarab Sages

Hungry Jack® - YUM!


Hungry Jack wrote:
Hungry Jack® - YUM!

Agreed. :)

Speaking of which, I don't suppose you have some pancakes made?

Liberty's Edge

I would rather have waffles.


lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:

A studio?

No wonder we're Angry Jacks.

We need a secret lab, weapons locker, new garage, smoke house, or better yet a brew house.

Sweetheart, in case you forgot, the studio is how we afford all of that stuff.

Oh, and the architect want you to please make up your minds on the design for the brew house or it'll never get built. ;P

If Jack the Stripper had a credit card swipe on his backside he'd probably make more money.


Jack Hammer wrote:
lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:

A studio?

No wonder we're Angry Jacks.

We need a secret lab, weapons locker, new garage, smoke house, or better yet a brew house.

Sweetheart, in case you forgot, the studio is how we afford all of that stuff.

Oh, and the architect want you to please make up your minds on the design for the brew house or it'll never get built. ;P
If Jack the Stripper had a credit card swipe on his backside he'd probably make more money.

Can I get stamps too?

Liberty's Edge

General Mauser VonEsandem wrote:

I heard zis waz ze place to come and jack. I zee now that I was right.

*turns on German Electronica*

Schprockets!

Sorry general, it's not a place to come and jack, it's a place to come and see Jack.


lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:

A studio?

No wonder we're Angry Jacks.

We need a secret lab, weapons locker, new garage, smoke house, or better yet a brew house.

Sweetheart, in case you forgot, the studio is how we afford all of that stuff.

Oh, and the architect want you to please make up your minds on the design for the brew house or it'll never get built. ;P

Aye, I am looking forward to it too.


lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:

A studio?

No wonder we're Angry Jacks.

We need a secret lab, weapons locker, new garage, smoke house, or better yet a brew house.

Sweetheart, in case you forgot, the studio is how we afford all of that stuff.

Oh, and the architect want you to please make up your minds on the design for the brew house or it'll never get built. ;P

Oh, it's a movie studio. For those kind of movies. I get it. ;P


Cultist of Jack wrote:
General Mauser VonEsandem wrote:

I heard zis waz ze place to come and jack. I zee now that I was right.

*turns on German Electronica*

Schprockets!

Sorry general, it's not a place to come and jack, it's a place to come and see Jack.

Dat is what I thought I was doing.


General Mauser VonEsandem wrote:
Cultist of Jack wrote:
General Mauser VonEsandem wrote:

I heard zis waz ze place to come and jack. I zee now that I was right.

*turns on German Electronica*

Schprockets!

Sorry general, it's not a place to come and jack, it's a place to come and see Jack.
Dat is what I thought I was doing.

Maybe lad, but not a soul can understand ye with that accent.


Jack Hammer wrote:
lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:

A studio?

No wonder we're Angry Jacks.

We need a secret lab, weapons locker, new garage, smoke house, or better yet a brew house.

Sweetheart, in case you forgot, the studio is how we afford all of that stuff.

Oh, and the architect want you to please make up your minds on the design for the brew house or it'll never get built. ;P
Oh, it's a movie studio. For those kind of movies. I get it. ;P

*rolls eyes*

Well, I should hope so, dear. It's your company. I just run it. ;P


Can I be head of company security? I maul gently.


Captain Jack wrote:
General Mauser VonEsandem wrote:
Cultist of Jack wrote:
General Mauser VonEsandem wrote:

I heard zis waz ze place to come and jack. I zee now that I was right.

*turns on German Electronica*

Schprockets!

Sorry general, it's not a place to come and jack, it's a place to come and see Jack.
Dat is what I thought I was doing.
Maybe lad, but not a soul can understand ye with that accent.

Vat?


Jack Hammer wrote:
lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:

A studio?

No wonder we're Angry Jacks.

We need a secret lab, weapons locker, new garage, smoke house, or better yet a brew house.

Sweetheart, in case you forgot, the studio is how we afford all of that stuff.

Oh, and the architect want you to please make up your minds on the design for the brew house or it'll never get built. ;P
If Jack the Stripper had a credit card swipe on his backside he'd probably make more money.

Did you try?

Dark Archive Bella Sara Charter Superscriber

Hungry Jack wrote:
Sebastian wrote:
Losers.
Hungry Jack® wonders if, perhaps, the pony is simply jealous because his own cult never lasted very long.

What! No! Never. My cult didn't last long because we had a long-standing policy of sacrificing the members. It's not that I'm jealous of the Cult of Jack or anything.

No...not me...I'm tough...

Spoiler:

~sob~

Dark Archive Bella Sara Charter Superscriber

Oh, and before I forget.

Losers.


Roy-Jack the Angry Tiger wrote:
Can I be head of company security? I maul gently.

I'm pretty sure that won't be a problem. After all we have a strict nepotism policy...any Jack that wants to work for us gets the job. :)

Liberty's Edge

I wonder where the boss went.


He's around, maybe in rehab


he's around, maybe in rehab.

Liberty's Edge

Nah, rehab is for quitters.


and poodles

The Exchange

Does it take two jacks to finish a sentence? Is that with or without the beers?


Beer? Don't mind if I do!

*pours a frosty PBR*

Ahhhh...that hits the spot.

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