The Angry Jack Cult


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What JRHM says is true...from a certain point of view.


The second rule of Jack is, he who smelt it dealt it.


The third rule of Jack is, if you slap it first it's yours.


The fourth rule of Jack is, don't look back.


The fifth rule of Jack is, if you have gross weight more the 6,000lbs you are classified as a truck.


The sixth rule of Jack is, Jill is not allowed to walk up hills.


The seventh rule of Jack is, mix with Mt. Dew afterwards.


The eighth rule of Jack is, always string your bass upside down.


The ninth rule of Jack, is "don't pay it to the IRS."


The tenth rule of Jack is, denile is not just a river in europe.


The eleventh rule of Jack is, Americans should not know how to do math, because only nerds can do math.


We have much to teach you, one with nasty PJs and bloody scythe.

You must learn the ways of the Jack, if you're to become a Dark & Stormy Knight.


The twelfth rule of Jack is, O'neal is much funnier than the new guy.


The thirteenth rule of Jack, is *I* rule your ass.


The fourteenth rule of Jack, even though you walk through the valley of the shadow of death, fear no evil, because you are the biggest, baddest m&%%%+-f$~~~# in the valley.


It seems that you have heard some whispers of the way of the Jack.


The fifteenth rule of Jack is, only pussies can't divide by zero.


The sixteenth rule of Jack is, if you can't spot the sucker within 10 minutes, than you are the sucker.


The seventeenth rule of Jack is, don't be dumb.


The eighteenth rule of Jack is, when going from here to there book your air at least 3 weeks in advance.


The nineteenth rule of Jack is, the cost per seat/mile on an airline ranges from about 7cents to 10 cents.


The twentieth rule of Jack is, never eat spinnach with a stranger.


The twenty-first rule of Jack is, every morning when you wake up say to yourself three times, "Today could be the day I die."


The twenty-second rule of Jack is, all children over 12 have to pay full price.


Nasty Pajamas wrote:


The twelfth rule of Jack is, O'neal is much funnier than the new guy.

But the new guy was much funnier on his old sci-fi show than O'Neil.

[fighting words] And D'Argo would sooooo kick Teal'c's ass. [/fighting words]


The twenty-third rule of Jack is, don't cut the trees down until you accounted for the rest of the forrest.


And never, ever pull Callous Jack's finger.


Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
[fighting words]And D'Argo would sooooo kick Teal'c's ass.[/fighting words]

Was Worf truley that much of a pussy?


The twenty-fourth rule of Jack is, if you are posting a rule you must number it, or you are FAIL.


Nasty Pajamas wrote:
Was Worf truley that much of a pussy?

Tasha Yarr would kick his ass. Sulu would kick both their asses and look fabulous doing it.


The twenty-fifth rule of Jack is, always bring your lap top with you when you are in a really, really boring meeting.


Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
Nasty Pajamas wrote:
Was Worf truley that much of a pussy?
Tasha Yarr would kick his ass.

and lick it


There are Rules and there are Laws. Pull CJ's finger and learn the difference. Just let me get out of the room first. ;)


Nasty Pajamas wrote:


The seventeenth rule of Jack is, don't be dumb.

We have trouble with that rule sometimes.


Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Nasty Pajamas wrote:


The seventeenth rule of Jack is, don't be dumb.
We have trouble with that rule sometimes.

I think she meant dumb like in not talking. Like, 'don't be quiet'. You dummy!

Pounces on JRHM and gives him noogies


Jack Hammer wrote:
Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Nasty Pajamas wrote:


The seventeenth rule of Jack is, don't be dumb.
We have trouble with that rule sometimes.

I think she meant dumb like in not talking. Like, 'don't be quiet'. You dummy!

Pounces on JRHM and gives him noogies

Ahhhh, no noogies!!!! Mercy! Mercy!


Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Nasty Pajamas wrote:


The seventeenth rule of Jack is, don't be dumb.
We have trouble with that rule sometimes.

I think she meant dumb like in not talking. Like, 'don't be quiet'. You dummy!

Pounces on JRHM and gives him noogies

Ahhhh, no noogies!!!! Mercy! Mercy!

Hah! I win!

Time for beer.


Jack Hammer wrote:
Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Nasty Pajamas wrote:


The seventeenth rule of Jack is, don't be dumb.
We have trouble with that rule sometimes.

I think she meant dumb like in not talking. Like, 'don't be quiet'. You dummy!

Pounces on JRHM and gives him noogies

Ahhhh, no noogies!!!! Mercy! Mercy!

Hah! I win!

Time for beer.

It sure is! *crashes beer keg over JH's head and gives him a swift kick in the can* HAHAHAHA!


OWWW! Tricked again.

Good thing the keg was empty, or you'd be in trouble for wasting beer.

Hey. There's a idea. Instead of smashing empty beer cans against our foreheads, let's try empty kegs.

You go first.


Jack Hammer wrote:

OWWW! Tricked again.

Good thing the keg was empty, or you'd be in trouble for wasting beer.

Hey. There's a idea. Instead of smashing empty beer cans against our foreheads, let's try empty kegs.

You go first.

*whack* *head smashes the beer keg* Beat that 'hammer!


Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:

OWWW! Tricked again.

Good thing the keg was empty, or you'd be in trouble for wasting beer.

Hey. There's a idea. Instead of smashing empty beer cans against our foreheads, let's try empty kegs.

You go first.

*whack* *head smashes the beer keg* Beat that 'hammer!

OK. *smashes 2nd keg into JRHM's forehead*

Looks like you win!


Jack Hammer wrote:
Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:

OWWW! Tricked again.

Good thing the keg was empty, or you'd be in trouble for wasting beer.

Hey. There's a idea. Instead of smashing empty beer cans against our foreheads, let's try empty kegs.

You go first.

*whack* *head smashes the beer keg* Beat that 'hammer!

OK. *smashes 2nd keg into JRHM's forehead*

Looks like you win!

OWWWWW! WHY YOU LITTLE..... *begins choking Hammer in a way similar to Homer choking Bart*

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

I like some of those new rules, we can add them to the current ones.

Now, now guys, fighting with kegs never got you anywhere, try these instead!
*hands over explosives, guns and large spikey weapons*


Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:

OWWW! Tricked again.

Good thing the keg was empty, or you'd be in trouble for wasting beer.

Hey. There's a idea. Instead of smashing empty beer cans against our foreheads, let's try empty kegs.

You go first.

*whack* *head smashes the beer keg* Beat that 'hammer!

OK. *smashes 2nd keg into JRHM's forehead*

Looks like you win!

OWWWWW! WHY YOU LITTLE..... *begins choking Hammer in a way similar to Homer choking Bart*

Gack!

Lack of oxygen. Things going fuzzy. Rerouting airways...

PFFFTTT!

Whoops! Wrong pathway. Don't remember eating that.


Callous Jack wrote:

I like some of those new rules, we can add them to the current ones.

Now, now guys, fighting with kegs never got you anywhere, try these instead!
*hands over explosives, guns and large spikey weapons*

I launched my own explosive. ;)


Jack Hammer wrote:
Callous Jack wrote:

I like some of those new rules, we can add them to the current ones.

Now, now guys, fighting with kegs never got you anywhere, try these instead!
*hands over explosives, guns and large spikey weapons*

I launched my own explosive. ;)

More like a W.O.D.* if you ask me...

*Weapon of Olfactory Destruction

;D


Jack Hammer wrote:
Callous Jack wrote:

I like some of those new rules, we can add them to the current ones.

Now, now guys, fighting with kegs never got you anywhere, try these instead!
*hands over explosives, guns and large spikey weapons*

I launched my own explosive. ;)

*lets go due to revolting odor* *cough* *cough*


A giant insect lands on a keg and punctures it with his hard snout. He drinks deeply but forget his alcohol tolerance level. Dizzy, he quickly flies into the nearest wall before scaling it and disappearing into a hidey hole.


I think we need to hire those frogs from the frog pond to get rid of these mosquitoes.

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:
I think we need to hire those frogs from the frog pond to get rid of these mosquitoes.

Get the tennis rackets!

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