I find that the best pick-me-up is humping a nice new squeaky toy.
I also enjoy mauling old french dudes, especially ex-politicians.
See? This is why you shouldn't've done that.
...
*Sigh*
I hate being Chaotic Good.
Now, I shall summon a huge monstrosity! The largest living thing on the planet! Flee! Flee for your lives!!!
*Huge field of shrooms appears*
Of course, it isn't animate or anything. However....
*Causes mushrooms to all fly at Jack, obscuring his vision and making his armor get all ugly*
You should be Chaotic Fun!
And a bigger summons isn't always better.*Begins to chant and sway, calling power from a far to fuel the summoning*
*Pees on Jacky boy*How about I kick yours instead. *punts CDP*I don't want a f#&~ing thing, Jacky boy. It was that grey-green fellow who proclaimed you fellows to be jinxes. If I were you, I'd kick his ass.What the $#@* do you want?
Go ahead my gray-green friend. The floor is all yours.
*punts CDP to the Jacks' Clubhouse*
<Airdrops 1000 of the best chew toys the world has to offer>
Hello Honored Poodles! Excellent chew toys from Lord President Moorluck, no strings attached. Please to enjoy in your own thread.
*punts CDP to the Jacks' Clubhouse**Pees on Jacky boy*How about I kick yours instead. *punts CDP*I don't want a f#&~ing thing, Jacky boy. It was that grey-green fellow who proclaimed you fellows to be jinxes. If I were you, I'd kick his ass.What the $#@* do you want?
Go ahead my gray-green friend. The floor is all yours.
*Sticks shrooms in both eyes of Jack for comical effect*
Hmm...perhaps I should find some psychowhatever shrooms? Then Peace LPD or whatever can can a friend. The Jacks would make very good hippies.
I luv hippies! They're sooo groovy.
<Airdrops 1000 of the best chew toys the world has to offer>
Hello Honored Poodles! Excellent chew toys from Lord President Moorluck, no strings attached. Please to enjoy in your own thread.
Ooh, chew toys!
*humps the lord secretary*
*pees on the lord secretary*
*punts CDP to the Jacks' Clubhouse**Pees on Jacky boy*How about I kick yours instead. *punts CDP*I don't want a f#&~ing thing, Jacky boy. It was that grey-green fellow who proclaimed you fellows to be jinxes. If I were you, I'd kick his ass.What the $#@* do you want?
Go ahead my gray-green friend. The floor is all yours.
*Sticks shrooms in both eyes of Jack for comical effect*
Hmm...perhaps I should find some psychowhatever shrooms? Then Peace LPD or whatever can can a friend. The Jacks would make very good hippies.
*Punts the Slaad*
I luv hippies! They're sooo groovy.
Oh no, not you again.
*The Slaad flies into the Maelstrom portal right next to them. There is a pause, then there is a gagging sound and the Slaad is spitted right out*
Huh. Oh well.
*Creates fog of flying mushrooms so thick the Jack can't see any way except back to the clubhouse*
Poodlevision: N-Ray Vision, Blocked by Bikinis and Lingerie.
I'd advice you to stay on our friendlier poodle thread, but nowadays...
*grabs political chewing toy and hides under the sofa*
There haven't been many good politics and religion fights on the OTD forums lately.
Everyone is too mired in the Edition trenches.
We should make a Poodle RPG. Then everyone would abandon all other games and follow our banner. That's how it usually works, right?
Yeah, it's worked so well for all those other RPG publishers out there.
We should make a Poodle RPG. Then everyone would abandon all other games and follow our banner. That's how it usually works, right?
Off coarse itt warks taht whey.
We should make a Poodle RPG. Then everyone would abandon all other games and follow our banner. That's how it usually works, right?
It should be a d12 system (no one expects a d12 system ... and they make great chew toys). Attributes would include:
- Snarkiness - measurement of wit and affects reactions of non-poodles
- Awareness - measurement of ability to notice squeaky and chew toys, as well as spotting non-poodles
- Quickness - measurement of speed of reaction or ability to avoid punting
- Poodleness - measurement of poodle nature
Skills could include:
- Humping
- Scampering
- Piddling
- Burying
- Yapping
- Chewing/Gnawing
- etc.
Creatures to encounter could include:
- Jacks
- Slaadi
- French People
- Self Appointed Governing Body Representatives
- Hybrids/Half-breeds
- Squirrels
- etc.
Just some thoughts ...
<piddles>
Good thoughts so far. Our new game will be the end of the edition wars!
Why have you dumbed down poodleness?!
I don't pee all over your edition of choice...
Actually I do, but I pee on lots of things, so don't feel bad.
Why have you dumbed down poodleness?!
Oh come on! The old system for poodleness was broken and you know it! The revamp makes the entire poodleness system more streamlined and makes for easier game play. Sheesh, why don't you go chew on a squeaky toy?
Actually that sounds like a good idea ...
<goes to hunt down a squeaky toy and piddles>
Why have you dumbed down poodleness?!Oh come on! The old system for poodleness was broken and you know it! The revamp makes the entire poodleness system more streamlined and makes for easier game play. Sheesh, why don't you go chew on a squeaky toy?
Actually that sounds like a good idea ...
<goes to hunt down a squeaky toy and piddles>
I don't know why the people who hate our new system feel the need to go spraying their bile every time we bring it up.
Resolution is handled by rolling d12 + appropriate Attribute + appropriate Skill and meeting a Poodle Difficulty or beating your opponent's roll + Attribute + Skill.
Each Attribute may only be used once per scene until all Attributes have been used. Then you may start over using an Attribute. You may not use that Attribute a third time until all Attributes have been used twice and so on.
Some attributes trump other attributes when rolling versus an opponent. Whoever has initiative declares their Attribute last. If using the appropriate trumping Attribute against the Attribute it trumps, the trumping Attribute is added to the roll, but the opponent does not get to add their Attribute to their roll. Further, the opponent still has to use all of their other Attributes before using the trumped Attribute as normal.
Initiative is determined by rolling 1d12 + (Quickness x 2) + Poodleness.
We shall call it Raise of the Poodle Lords Role Poodling Game or RPLRPG.
*pees on the lord secretary*
I'm glad to see you are so...happy with the chew toys. Please continue to enjoy them in this thread.
We shall call it Raise of the Poodle Lords Role Poodling Game or RPLRPG.
Poodle: The Humping?
We shall call it Raise of the Poodle Lords Role Poodling Game or RPLRPG.Poodle: The Humping?
LMAO ... I wonder if White Wolf would be interested ...
<piddles>
LMAO ... I wonder if White Wolf would be interested ...
Needs more angst.
Can I have a monster named after me in our new game? Or maybe a spell?
We should make a Poodle RPG. Then everyone would abandon all other games and follow our banner. That's how it usually works, right?It should be a d12 system (no one expects a d12 system ... and they make great chew toys). Attributes would include:
- Snarkiness - measurement of wit and affects reactions of non-poodles
- Awareness - measurement of ability to notice squeaky and chew toys, as well as spotting non-poodles
- Quickness - measurement of speed of reaction or ability to avoid punting
- Poodleness - measurement of poodle nature
Skills could include:
- Humping
- Scampering
- Piddling
- Burying
- Yapping
- Chewing/Gnawing
- etc.
Creatures to encounter could include:
- Jacks
- Slaadi
- French People
- Self Appointed Governing Body Representatives
- Hybrids/Half-breeds
- Squirrels
- etc.
Just some thoughts ...
<piddles>
Nad teh items cud bee:
- Neutraler (evill)
- Cush
- Deb
- (Ass-sorted sticky tois)
- Bisquicks
- Beon
- Evvil fornitcure
- Scocht colors
Can I have a monster named after me in our new game? Or maybe a spell?
How about a prestige poodle?
Once per scene you get an automatic Depressed Defense where you can shrug off the affect of anything, because, hey, that happened to you once before.
We shall call it Raise of the Poodle Lords Role Poodling Game or RPLRPG.Poodle: The Humping?
Rite know iss won off teh thymes wen hime wash hime diedent haff tish sleeping probelem.
Who abut "Puddles nad Piddles?" Orr "Quart Tool: Dog off Raw?"
We shall call it Raise of the Poodle Lords Role Poodling Game or RPLRPG.
OMD!, where can it buy it!
*runs arpund in circles in excitment*
We should make a Poodle RPG. Then everyone would abandon all other games and follow our banner. That's how it usually works, right?It should be a d12 system (no one expects a d12 system ... and they make great chew toys). Attributes would include:
- Snarkiness - measurement of wit and affects reactions of non-poodles
- Awareness - measurement of ability to notice squeaky and chew toys, as well as spotting non-poodles
- Quickness - measurement of speed of reaction or ability to avoid punting
- Poodleness - measurement of poodle nature
Skills could include:
- Humping
- Scampering
- Piddling
- Burying
- Yapping
- Chewing/Gnawing
- etc.
Creatures to encounter could include:
- Jacks
- Slaadi
- French People
- Self Appointed Governing Body Representatives
- Hybrids/Half-breeds
- Squirrels
- etc.
Just some thoughts ...
<piddles>
I got some more skills to add! I'll get my clipboard!
*Starts writing on board with moldy carrot*- Whining
- Flying (for when launched and stuff)
Resolution is handled by rolling d12 + appropriate Attribute + appropriate Skill and meeting a Poodle Difficulty or beating your opponent's roll + Attribute + Skill.
Each Attribute may only be used once per scene until all Attributes have been used. Then you may start over using an Attribute. You may not use that Attribute a third time until all Attributes have been used twice and so on.
Some attributes trump other attributes when rolling versus an opponent. Whoever has initiative declares their Attribute last. If using the appropriate trumping Attribute against the Attribute it trumps, the trumping Attribute is added to the roll, but the opponent does not get to add their Attribute to their roll. Further, the opponent still has to use all of their other Attributes before using the trumped Attribute as normal.
Initiative is determined by rolling 1d12 + (Quickness x 2) + Poodleness.
Simple ... I like it!
Of course, Poodleness will trump all other attributes.
We should make a Poodle RPG. Then everyone would abandon all other games and follow our banner. That's how it usually works, right?
(excellent ideas snipped)
Don't forget "laying landmines" and various squeaky toy weapons.
What do you do in this game?
I think the objectives should be to get as many treats and squeaky toys as possible, get extra points for humping, and try to avoid the jacks wherever possible.
What do you do in this game?
I think the objectives should be to get as many treats and squeaky toys as possible, get extra points for humping, and try to avoid the jacks wherever possible.
Knocking squirrels out of trees or repelling invasions from other threads would be secondary objectives.
Barkeep, I need a drink! I just found out the one I love, President Moorluck's Presidential Pet, is my identical cousin.
<sobs>
What do you do in this game?
Don't forget my favorite, licking yourself.
We should also have a collector's edition of the Poodle RPG. It would have a squeaky toy included plus a piece of Courtfool's "chocolate". YAP!
When I was a puppy, I had a collectors edition bone, but someone stole it.....I think it was a frenchie.
What do you do in this game?Don't forget my favorite, licking yourself.
I'm putting two feats on that
Hime thank wee shud haff "Trinkting" ass uh skull two.