Kingdom of Loathing - Paizonian Guild!


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Yes! Another time-waster - but this time, it can be played during conference calls and at work! Go forth to Kingdom of Loathing and join the Paizonians clan! (You have to be level 3 to join a clan.) It's funny, it's irreverent - you'll have a good time. Promise.

:) Send a message to Lilith Darkmoon to let me know when you get there so you can automatically be accepted into the Clan!

An awesome reference, with recipes and quest guides, is The KoL Wiki. Eltanin has a bartender-in-a-box (so cocktail recipes don't cost you adventures if you send the ingredients to him) and I have a chef-in-a-box (cooking doesn't cost you adventures if you send me the ingredients).

Hope to see you there. :D


It's true! The Kingdom of Loathing is a wonderfully terrible way to waste your time. You too can fight dirty hippies, baseball bats (you know, they fly and look like a baseball), and harem girls. Eat until you can't eat any more but gain no calories! Drink until you're falling down drunk, but there's no hangover!

To begin, go to Mt. Noob and talk with the Toot Oriole. He'll set you aright.

If you have any questions, you can ask them real time at the *Paizonian Chat Room* where Lilith, Daigle, and I spend an inordinate amount of time. Daigle doesn't talk much though. He's a sleeping Daigle-bear.

See ya'll there, fellow Paizonians.

Liberty's Edge

Yay! An adventurer is me!

I am known as Mr. Shiny, low-level Seal Clubber.


The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:

Yay! An adventurer is me!

I am known as Mr. Shiny, low-level Seal Clubber.

Welcome to the insanity Mr. Shiny! We'll get you on the list so that you can join the clan when you're level 3.

Liberty's Edge

Eltanin wrote:
The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:

Yay! An adventurer is me!

I am known as Mr. Shiny, low-level Seal Clubber.

Welcome to the insanity Mr. Shiny! We'll get you on the list so that you can join the clan when you're level 3.

Cool.

You're fighting a fluffy bunny. You pretend that it's a seal, and club the crap out of it for 7 damage. WHACK! KAPOW! KAPOW!

You win the fight!

You gain 9 Meat.

You gain 1 Roguishness.


You've been put on the Clan Whitelist, so all you gotta do is apply to the Paizonians and you'll automagically be accepted. :)

Dark Archive RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32

KoL Status: Blocked by Firewall. :(


Fatespinner wrote:
KoL Status: Blocked by Firewall. :(

Bummer man! :(


Pesto XIV is now a 3rd-level Sauceror. Message sent. :)

Liberty's Edge

Lilith wrote:
You've been put on the Clan Whitelist, so all you gotta do is apply to the Paizonians and you'll automagically be accepted. :)

That reminds me. My friend Ben is the head of Clan Hurricanes (or something similar).


Here's another sample of the fun that awaits you, should you choose to play with us in the Kingdom of Loathing.

This is the description of an item that is purchasable at the Market on a special celebration day. It's a firework to celebrate Dependence Day, of course.

Sparkler
This is a shortish piece of stiff wire with some hard, glittery gray stuff on it, used during 4th of Bor celebrations to... er... make a bunch of sparks. That's why they call it a sparkler. It's certainly the half-caf soy-milk frappuccino of fireworks, since it fails the "big loud boom" and "impressive blast radius" tests, and only barely passes the "might cause grievous bodily harm" test.

So don't be shy, and come join the Paizonians guild in the land of laughter, light-heartedness, and Loathing!

(in other words: bump)

Scarab Sages

Damnation! I just dropped my old clan for a newer one that had less beggers and such, but I'll be swithing over after rollover tonight. Prepare for Big Coffin Hunter, the 21st level Pastamancer. Let me know if you need any lo meins, hi meins, or chow meins made and I can get them taken care of... I have access to the Wok of Ages.


Sweet Gav! I demand hell ramen as payment! :D

Liberty's Edge

Hmm... mayhaps I should log in more than once a week to burn 200 adventurers with the trainer...

Scarab Sages

Lilith wrote:
Sweet Gav! I demand hell ramen as payment! :D

You'll have to take an I.O.U. on that, Lilith. I won't be able to make Hell Ramen until I've got levels as a Sauceror. Which is what I plan on taking after I ascend. The marriage of Pastamancer and Sauceror is almost nigh.


Oh, well then, painful penne pasta is acceptable as well.


just no white sauce on my pasta pls; am finally feeling well enough to play; I expect to be on tonight bout 630pm MST

Liberty's Edge

Mr. Shiny, 4th-level Ermine Thumper has been on a Meat-donating binge. Clan Paizonians now has 11,497 Meat. Too bad I also took the Box-In-A-Box-In-A-Box, White Sword, Locked Orcish Meat Lockers, and Rusty/Crusty L-Shaped Pieces of Metal.

By the way, I stuck my Cocoa Egg in the stash, so it's not a total sweep of all the goodies.

Cheers.


I'm dying for some Spooky Fertilizer - if anyone gets this PLEASE put it in the stash. Wants my ghuol whelp familiar, I do!

Scarab Sages

Lilith wrote:
I'm dying for some Spooky Fertilizer - if anyone gets this PLEASE put it in the stash. Wants my ghuol whelp familiar, I do!

Got some for ya, ClanMistress. It's in the stash.

BTW, Yippee, I just got my trophy for 300 pounds worth of familiars.

Liberty's Edge

Lilith wrote:
I'm dying for some Spooky Fertilizer - if anyone gets this PLEASE put it in the stash. Wants my ghuol whelp familiar, I do!

If anyone wants my mosquito familiar, you can TAKE it.

No Spooky Fertilizer, just a Spooky Sapling.

Liberty's Edge

I finally got some Spooky Fertilizer, and it's in the stash.

By the way, does anyone know how to get a hold of some rims for the B**$#in' Meatcar quest with the Brotherhood of the Smackdown?


The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:

I finally got some Spooky Fertilizer, and it's in the stash.

By the way, does anyone know how to get a hold of some rims for the b&%@~in' Meatcar quest with the Brotherhood of the Smackdown?

To get the rims, you need to get a hermit pass and some worthless gewgaws. You can get the sweet rims then. :)

Scarab Sages

Lilith wrote:
The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:

I finally got some Spooky Fertilizer, and it's in the stash.

By the way, does anyone know how to get a hold of some rims for the b&%@~in' Meatcar quest with the Brotherhood of the Smackdown?

To get the rims, you need to get a hermit pass and some worthless gewgaws. You can get the sweet rims then. :)

Which means fishing in the sewers for the worthless stuff.


This sounds like a total waste of my time. I'm in.

Liberty's Edge

Gavgoyle wrote:
Lilith wrote:
The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:

I finally got some Spooky Fertilizer, and it's in the stash.

By the way, does anyone know how to get a hold of some rims for the b&%@~in' Meatcar quest with the Brotherhood of the Smackdown?

To get the rims, you need to get a hermit pass and some worthless gewgaws. You can get the sweet rims then. :)
Which means fishing in the sewers for the worthless stuff.

Heh. Already got some o' dem gewgaws. But no Adventures and no Meat. I'm on it on the morrow.


I'm Jerk Gentry, 2nd level Saucemancer. Working on 3rd level.

I like how the specific quality that is associated with your class is what determines whether you level up. It's very 1st ed.

You are fighting a fluffy bunny.

Liberty's Edge

Dirk Gently wrote:

I'm Jerk Gentry, 2nd level Saucemancer. Working on 3rd level.

Sauceror? Or Pastamancer?


The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:
Dirk Gently wrote:

I'm Jerk Gentry, 2nd level Saucemancer. Working on 3rd level.

Sauceror? Or Pastamancer?

Sauceror. At 3rd now. Waiting for reply from clan, O headmistress.


i am wic the 4th level Sauceror muhahahahahehehehahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha


Dirk Gently wrote:
Sauceror. At 3rd now. Waiting for reply from clan, O headmistress.

Welcome to Clan Paizonians! :D

Grand Lodge

Vattnisse is currently a level 2 Turtle Tamer. My brother is playing Frumious B, a level 2 Disco Bandit. We'll be joining at the first opportunity!

Grand Lodge

Haha! Vattnisse is now a level 3 Turtle Tamer! On my last adventure of the day, no less.


:( i am too drunk to do anything


AWED wrote:
:( i am too drunk to do anything

Didn't you read the warning on the booze?


Dirk Gently wrote:
AWED wrote:
:( i am too drunk to do anything
Didn't you read the warning on the booze?

yeah, but i didn' listen to it.

Liberty's Edge

AWED wrote:
Dirk Gently wrote:
AWED wrote:
:( i am too drunk to do anything
Didn't you read the warning on the booze?
yeah, but i didn' listen to it.

Evidently...

Liberty's Edge

Dragonmann, the HARDCORE OXYGENARIAN Accordian thief has requested membership-like benefits

Liberty's Edge

Heh heh. I now have my very own B*%@$in' Meatcar to cruise around in. B!!$*in'.

By the way, I fouund more Spooky-Gro Fertilizer if anyone wants it.

Also, what the HELL am I supposed to do with 17 Rat Whiskers or a Spooky Sapling? What am I going to do about the Hobo's Map? Or the Spooky Temple Map?

Liberty's Edge

The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:

Heh heh. I now have my very own b&!@!in' Meatcar to cruise around in. b&!@!in'.

By the way, I fouund more Spooky-Gro Fertilizer if anyone wants it.

Also, what the HELL am I supposed to do with 17 Rat Whiskers or a Spooky Sapling? What am I going to do about the Hobo's Map? Or the Spooky Temple Map?

I believe it is have the map, the fertilizer, and the sappling in your inventory at the same time, and use the map...


The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:

Heh heh. I now have my very own b~*!&in' Meatcar to cruise around in. b~*!&in'.

By the way, I fouund more Spooky-Gro Fertilizer if anyone wants it.

Also, what the HELL am I supposed to do with 17 Rat Whiskers or a Spooky Sapling? What am I going to do about the Hobo's Map? Or the Spooky Temple Map?

I put 3 ghuol eggs in the stash. You should take one and use the Spooky-Gro on it to get yourself a ghuol whelp familiar.

You need some sort of stench resistance (like the Pine-Fresh Airfreshener) and an asparagus knife in your inventory to successfully use the Hobo Map.

Grand Lodge

Hooray! Clan Paizonians have accepted Vattnisse the Frog Director! As a sign of my gratitude, I just donated 800 Meat and some crap I took off some Knob Goblin corpses.


thank you for accepting me also, donated 100 meat. lost most of it getting drunk...yeah i know it is sad,but i like getting more adventure points.

Scarab Sages

Mr. Shiny: take your rat whiskers to the painter in town and he will pay you pretty well for them (well, pretty well for lower level stuff) Having a crap-load is good for you.

Dragonman: I'm impressed! Going Oxygenarian is pretty ballsy for your second time around, I'm planning on doing a hardcore next time, but just as a tea-totaler, not an Oxygenarian. Kudos to you, dude!

Liberty's Edge

Gavgoyle wrote:

Mr. Shiny: take your rat whiskers to the painter in town and he will pay you pretty well for them (well, pretty well for lower level stuff) Having a crap-load is good for you.

Dragonman: I'm impressed! Going Oxygenarian is pretty ballsy for your second time around, I'm planning on doing a hardcore next time, but just as a tea-totaler, not an Oxygenarian. Kudos to you, dude!

Well, I only get to sit and play maybe once a week, so I almost always have 200 adventures anyway, so all I am missing is the stat gains... well yeah i could get another 30 adventures in per week or so, but most weeks i go to the trainer and spend 200 adventures there just to keep my pot empty...

level 18 now, should go deal with the NS soon


I've mostly been donating low-level weapons I have surpassed to the stash. And crap I can't figure out what it's for. I took some pretty neat pants from the stash (I was naked from the waist down before), but so far that's about it.

I keep getting beat up by bats. That's not fun. And I keep wasting items, adventures, and meat making it so that I can even adventure again.

Grand Lodge

Yeah, I keep getting chewed up in the Typical Tavern's basement as well. Apparently you just need to find a valve and turn it off, but it is rather dark down there...

Edit: And I just found it. "Thanks for turning off my Rat Faucet", said the barkeep.


Yes, that basement is a little rough. The bats were pretty hard too. There seem to be several adventures like that where you just have to come back later or you spend a lot of time Beaten Up. The Bonerdragon is my current nemesis.

If you're looking to gain some stats in a hurry, make sure you've done what you need to do to adventure in the Hidden Temple. It won't give you meat or nothing, but it sure boosts your stats in a hurry.


Yeah. Whenever I want to level up fast, I just go to the Hidden Temple. About half the time it gives me a whole mysticality point. (I got two Moxie at the same time earlier)

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