wanted the dang thing.
Godzilla and Godzooky
, who recently escaped from their captivity in
the Twighlight Zone, decided to give up
smoking. And burning. And belching up lava.
King Ghidora scoffed at this behavior, saying,
"Comrades! This is a most un-monsterlike behaviour!
Then skulked off to level Poughkeepsie. He
first instructed the monster union (Giant Anthropomorphic
Mesomorph's Local 153), to strike if he
didn't make it back. "That'll show those
friggin' humans!" Ghidora stomped on a Toys-R-Us,
much to my personal satisfaction, and crapped
in a public fountain, bevore chewing up
all the bubblegum in Hershey, Pennsylvania! Godzooky
being the littlest, decided to trample down
Ferris Beuller's house in Shermer, Illinois. So
off he stalked to give that annoying
truent his proper come-uppance! But before
he could deliver the fatal blow he
stopped for lunch at Taco Time, which
had what many consider the best burritos.
However, Ferris Bueller was able to escape
due to lack of a serious career
- with plenty of spare time, he had
almost gotten to Helm's Deep, when the
cozy caves would hide him from the
Evil Nasty Bad People outside the gates.
But the elves came to...wait, elves?
Yes indeed! Long-eared, scraggly, non-sleeping, live forever,
in the simplest terms and the most
painfully obvious way just plain better than
the most convenient definitions. You see us
in your duplicity and none of your
fancy-schmancy sophistry can change that! Confused, Ferris
decided to strike a deal with Mephistopheles
wherein he would gain safe passage through
Cania, so he could see Asmodeus about
reversing the mileage on Cameron's Dad's Car.
"Yo, your Infernal Majesty", he said, "here's
the deal, Ferris had this dumb idea
of referring to himself in third-person
because he was so confused, he stuttered
whhhheeerrreee iiiissss yyyyoouuurrrr
pppaaassssppooorrrrttt yyyyooouuu
uuuguggggglllllyyy fffiiiiieeeennnnddddd?
This brought gales of laughter from the
assembled fiends, especially Asmodeus who was laughing
so hard that flames came out of
every known orifice and a few unknown
ones as well. "Whoa, dude, the flames
you are spouting are singeing my 80's
hair band glitter clothes I won on
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