and preventing Kate Upton from tanning properly.
This greatly upset the newly founded order
of Perfect Tan Lines, which planned to
use the ever sexy Kate and friends
to promote the new GoatToucher-subsidized product
With the slogan teats, better than t$!!
people wondered what all the symbols meant
It means one word has been censored
but then this happened. The biggest smelliest
censor bar ever descended upon the most
biggest smelliest genitals the world had ever seen
just in time to prevent children from
indulging themselves in the greatest vice: Corn and
High on fructose corn syrup, snot nose
punks! "This can never stand!" shouted the
the construction worker near the unstable tower on
The Island of Dread. The punks however
continued to destabilize the tower until it
Toppled over as the gang shouted "Jenga!"
, their terrifying battle cry that put fear
into the residents of a nearby town
and scattered several herds of wild, mutant
toddlers with boogery noses and wet pants.
The bleating of the toddlers drew GoatToucher,
Lord of the Gnarled Shoes, out from
his workroom for but a minute, before
his shrew wife screeched at him to
Not forget his Vicks Vape o rub
, which GoatToucher needed to apply to his
Chesticles, a wide swath of bodily territory
covered in wire-like hair and dangly
Dingle berries. GoatToucher went to the gym,
the owner was his former "client" and
a recipient of the Nobel Prize for
extreme hardcore squats, jumping jacks and pushups
on a bed of flaming, poisoned spikes.
Though he has now cross trained into
exercising on non-poisoned spikes too, which means
a restful nights sleep without counting sheep.
A pod of clowns infiltrated the gym
to search for the Legendary Sword of
Costco, famous for cutting prices on bulky
beds and for bearing the logo of
the Costco imperium's navy and air force
which featured a gold coin rolling into
A ring for Cuban cigars and a
rabid kangaroo wielding the deadly Blade of
Blunted dreams of the blunt smokers, where
pot is never legalized, because it is
what they use to cook soup in
|