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Gene wrote:Why does my dad have to be such a f#*%ing moron?
... stuff stuff stuff ...
Just remember that when you get older you will turn into him.
Having said that, get a motion detector thingy to put down near the kitty door. Then, the light will only come on while they are in there.
Plus it will drive your dad crazy! Put one on the floor too, so it will stay on even if the don't go near the kitty door.

Tensor |

... I'm keeping an eye on my kidneys, just in case that's what she's after. I sincerely can't imagine another reason for her to see me.
Make sure to subtly put her down two or three times. Don't make it obvious, and not too heavy, but negative. She'll crack like a glass jar full of marbles, and prolly even give you money.

Mairkurion {tm} |

James Keegan wrote:Make sure to subtly put her down two or three times. Don't make it obvious, and not too heavy, but negative. She'll crack like a glass jar full of marbles, and prolly even give you money.... I'm keeping an eye on my kidneys, just in case that's what she's after. I sincerely can't imagine another reason for her to see me.
Good point, Tensor
But don't tell Gene that! You'll make him nuts!

Tensor |

Tensor wrote:Plus it will drive your dad crazy! Put one on the floor too, so it will stay on even if the don't go near the kitty door.Gene wrote:Why does my dad have to be such a f#*%ing moron?... stuff stuff stuff ...Just remember that when you get older you will turn into him.
Having said that, get a motion detector thingy to put down near the kitty door. Then, the light will only come on while they are in there.
I wouldn't even tell your dad you are doing it. He will prolly never even know about it.
*twitching in the background while rocking back and forth*
You have to think of the kitties, and keep them happy!

KnightErrantJR |

Sorry.....I'm trying to be all cryptic like those Oracles of Delphii.
I got too little sleep last night after too much work, and I think it futzes with how I come off to folks.
You had to call yourself an oracle, didn't you? I got this horrible picture of a mangy werewolf all drunked up and hovering in the air delivering a prophesy to Leonidas only wearing wind blown wisps of cloth.

Tensor |

For a moment there, I thought you were going to prophesize my doom, or maybe a tentacle was gong to pop out of your forehead and grab me..
You gots the power
Edit: Also, that scene from 13th warrior where the woman was going to be burned with the dead viking king came to mind: "I see before me my Father and my Mother, and those who came before me..."

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Heathansson wrote:Sorry.....I'm trying to be all cryptic like those Oracles of Delphii.
I got too little sleep last night after too much work, and I think it futzes with how I come off to folks.You had to call yourself an oracle, didn't you? I got this horrible picture of a mangy werewolf all drunked up and hovering in the air delivering a prophesy to Leonidas only wearing wind blown wisps of cloth.
Why are people always trying to lay the frightening contents of their subconscious sock drawers on me, man?

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For a moment there, I thought you were going to prophesize my doom, or maybe a tentacle was gong to pop out of your forehead and grab me..
You gots the power
No way. (lol) though I've been trying to invent on a monster, and goddangit! There will BE NO TENTNICULES!!!! THIS I SWEAR'S!!!
It's supposed to replace a nostalgiac monster that I don't want to use in that encounter, but no other nostalgiac monster from D&D or CoC for that matter quite fits.So I've gone to literature.....
Problem is, I don't think anybody'll have read the book(s), or if they have will recognize the monster.
Although that might not be a problem necessarily.

Aaron Bitman |

Here's my rant of the day.
I love to tell stories. (That's the major reason I play RPGs, especially as GM, so much.) A long time ago (Hah!) when I first told my daughter the Star Wars story, my wife, who had seen very few movies in her life and had commented that she knew nothing about Star Wars, suddenly burst out "Oh, I think I heard about this! ..."
I mean, really! I didn't even get up to the part where Kenobi claims Vader betrayed and murdered Luke's father yet!
But I managed to restrict my comment to simply "Shh."
Another time, the same daughter was playing Outburst with me (a game in which a player tries to guess as many answers to a question as possible) and my wife burst out with an answer, upsetting my daughter, who would then never know if she could have come up with the answer herself. This time, my comment was "Unless you're the player, I respectfully request no comments from the peanut gallery."
So far, it wasn't SO bad. I wouldn't be ranting just because of that.
But this morning, while serving breakfast, I was telling my younger child the Harry Potter story. (I had already related each of the books to my daughter several times.) And as I was telling about the first time Harry met...
I mean, really!

Saern |

I hear you, Aaron. I like to consider myself a pretty compotent raconteur, and my friends and family seem to acknowledge that. Often times, they let me tell stories about things that happened to them, because they say I tell them better. Timing and building tension are two of the most important and powerful tools in story-telling. Which is why it drives me nuts when, at certain family gatherings, a certain family member will often interrupt and spill the beans if he's heard the story before.
"Oh, yeah, and it turns out such-and-such, Yeah, I've heard that."
Well that's just wonderful, but maybe the other six people I was telling the story to haven't. Ever think about that? Everyone else is able to patiently listen while I tell the story to a new person, even though the others have heard it already. They even seem to enjoy hearing it again and watching the new person's reaction to what they know is coming. They don't burst out and ruin it.

Aaron Bitman |

Thanks, Saern.
And by the way, I got that rant out of my system. I just want to emphasize that my wife is a wonderful woman. Seriously. Thanks to her efforts, I don't find marriage to be the living hell some people find it to be. What nits I pick are pitifully few and small.
Which I guess was your intent, all those years ago.
We all need to vent sometimes, but it's often hard to find the right thread to let that pent up anger out in. So, that's what this thread is for: letting off steam about your pet peeves about the games, players, DMs, whatever. I just want to preface thjat I, at least, harbor no bad feelings for anyone in my group;

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Hey everybody! Here's another heaping slice of self-pity for each and every one of you to not read!
I have promoted the s$@$ out of fellow artists, and after they got into decent jobs, I can't get a hold of them. Every time I join a band, something comes up, and the band folds. I try to write something, and someone else immediately writes something worlds better. I am constantly being one-upped by people I know and trust, and I'm sick of always being second-best.
I remember hearing Henry Rollins talking about the first big-time punk rock show he ever saw. Basically, in 1979, Henry, Chris Haskett, Jeff Nelson, Ian MacKaye, and his brother Alec all piled into Ian's car and drove into downtown DC to see the Ramones. In the years after the show, everyone in the car started a major rock band that was part of the DC scene. Some even went past there:
Henry Rollins: State of Alert, Black Flag, Rollins Band, founder of 2-13-61
Chris Haskett: Foetus, Rollins Band
Jeff Nelson: Teen Idles, Minor Threat, Egg Hunt, co-founder of Dischord Records
Ian MacKaye: Teen Idles, Minor Threat, Egg Hunt, Fugazi, Embrace, Evens, co-founder of Dischord Records
Alec MacKaye: The Untouchables, The Warmers
I SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN THAT F+%*ING CAR.

James Keegan |

Hey everybody! Here's another heaping slice of self-pity for each and every one of you to not read!
** spoiler omitted **
The best advice I've ever gotten seems so obvious and yet is ridiculously hard to follow and keep up with: go out there and fail. Failure is the best teacher, especially if someone is willing to sit you down and explain what you did wrong. One cannot live their life afraid of failing; you have to put yourself out there sooner or later. Going into art school or anywhere, listen only to the people that are brutally honest with you; "interesting" is a wuss-out answer for a critique because it implies that one cannot form an opinion of your work. If an instructor or a fellow student tells you that your work is poor (they won't say "poor", they'll just give you a laundry list of things to fix) and lists why and how to fix it and then points out the things that are working: listen to them.
There's an old saying,"It took me ten years to become an overnight success". And brother, it's the truth. I spent four years and a ridiculous amount of money on art school and I basically give my work away. I'm lucky and grateful if I make $20-30 for a drawing. But I've only been out for two years now; I'm 24 years old. People like you and I are a dime a dozen: everyone and their dad is either a musician or an artist. The thing that separates the people doing it for fun and the people doing it for a living is grit: sticking to what they love and working hard at it day and night makes more of a difference than being naturally talented. If it means a lot to you, stick with it.

Charles Evans 25 |
[rant] Okay. I have already posted on another thread on the suckitude of the England (men's) cricket squad these days. Now it's the turn for the Australians.
What is wrong with the Australian side??? They get a whole day's play AND an extra half hour and they still can't manage to bowl the alloted ninety overs. I mean come on, this was the England men's side - they're hardly likely to smack the ball out of the ground (especially not at the Oval and with Pietersen missing) leading to 'lost ball' delays, and why the heck else wouldn't the Australians be able to bowl the ninety overs that they're supposed to get in?
We need Geoffrey Boycott's suggestion of penalty runs for sides which bowl too slowly implemented. Until it is, spectators and listeners to television/radio are going to continue to be short-changed on the action. [/rant]

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[rant] Okay. I have already posted on another thread on the suckitude of the England (men's) cricket squad these days. Now it's the turn for the Australians.
What is wrong with the Australian side??? They get a whole day's play AND an extra half hour and they still can't manage to bowl the alloted ninety overs. I mean come on, this was the England men's side - they're hardly likely to smack the ball out of the ground (especially not at the Oval and with Pietersen missing) leading to 'lost ball' delays, and why the heck else wouldn't the Australians be able to bowl the ninety overs that they're supposed to get in?
We need Geoffrey Boycott's suggestion of penalty runs for sides which bowl too slowly implemented. Until it is, spectators and listeners to television/radio are going to continue to be short-changed on the action. [/rant]
People who type nonsensical gibberish on a mostly American board...
;)

The Jade |

Hey everybody! Here's another heaping slice of self-pity for each and every one of you to not read!
** spoiler omitted **
Channel that rage at being second best and you might have a first rate song. Worked for Soundgarden.

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Hey, look! A rant that's not about me!
As some of you know, I work as a cashier/attendant/janitor/handyman at a gas station / garage. Today, my boss had to call in an outside mechanic to work on a car. I never actually saw the guy, but I do know that he must have the common sense and foresight of a brain-dead goldfish. The following is a dramatization of actual events:
This particular mechanic, at approximately two o'clock PM, needs to take a leak. Instead of using the employee restroom (which is in the garage), he walks past it, all the way to the other side of the building to use the customer restroom. Upon exiting the restroom, he notices that he has tracked engine oil through the entire building. Instead of simply telling someone to mop it up, he panics and rushes back to the garage.
Searching desperately for something to cut through the oil, his eyes light upon a spray-can of carbon choke cleaner. For those of you unfamiliar with the stuff, it's basically oven cleaner on steroids. One spray in the eyes, and you won't have any left. In any case, Mr. Fantastic rushes back to the restroom, spraying choke cleaner right and left. Soon, he realizes that the choke cleaner has not only eaten through the oil, but also the paint on the concrete floor, and in some parts, carpet. Again, he panics, and replaces the cleaner, neglecting to tell anyone.
This entire chain of events pissed off my boss so bad that half of the mechanics had to leave early. We now have to replace two rugs, re-wax the linoleum, and repaint the cement.
My question is thus: WHY THE F**# ARE PEOPLE SO F!$%ING STUPID?

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Hey, look! A rant that's not about me!
As some of you know, I work as a cashier/attendant/janitor/handyman at a gas station / garage. Today, my boss had to call in an outside mechanic to work on a car. I never actually saw the guy, but I do know that he must have the common sense and foresight of a brain-dead goldfish. The following is a dramatization of actual events:
This particular mechanic, at approximately two o'clock PM, needs to take a leak. Instead of using the employee restroom (which is in the garage), he walks past it, all the way to the other side of the building to use the customer restroom. Upon exiting the restroom, he notices that he has tracked engine oil through the entire building. Instead of simply telling someone to mop it up, he panics and rushes back to the garage.
Searching desperately for something to cut through the oil, his eyes light upon a spray-can of carbon choke cleaner. For those of you unfamiliar with the stuff, it's basically oven cleaner on steroids. One spray in the eyes, and you won't have any left. In any case, Mr. Fantastic rushes back to the restroom, spraying choke cleaner right and left. Soon, he realizes that the choke cleaner has not only eaten through the oil, but also the paint on the concrete floor, and in some parts, carpet. Again, he panics, and replaces the cleaner, neglecting to tell anyone.
This entire chain of events pissed off my boss so bad that half of the mechanics had to leave early. We now have to replace two rugs, re-wax the linoleum, and repaint the cement.
My question is thus: WHY THE f%** ARE PEOPLE SO f%**ING STUPID?
I grew up in rural New York. Do you need a list?

Charles Evans 25 |
I have just posted a thread for sports related rants, after starting to feel a bit guilty about cluttering this thread up with comments regarding cricket. *link*

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houstonderek wrote:Damn straight.The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:Depends. Does yours start with "More country stations than Texas" and end with "When did meth get this far north"?houstonderek wrote:I grew up in rural New York. Do you need a list?I wonder if your list and my list match.
Yeah, they probably match then ;)

Charles Evans 25 |
Dear Father Christmas,
I am writing to let you know what naughty, noisy, girls Sophie (aged almost 4) and Isabella (aged almost one and a bit) are.
They scatter toys all over the floor, hide things under carpets, refuse to eat the nice food their grandma cooks them, and in noise output imitate a pair of small but demented ban sidhe at times when their uncle Charles is trying to sleep.
They do NOT deserve any more nice toys like that Dora keyboard or soft tiger that they got last Christmas; please bring them only lumps of coal.
Yours Sincerely,
Their very tired and grumpy uncle Charles.