Man! The suspense is killing me! I am heading to my FLGS tomorrow to pick up the issue and I can't wait to cast my vote...but who will the young master endorse...?
So I get my issue #131 today and I skim through it.
Erik's editorial--superb; the letters--extremely thought-provoking, Monte's column--insightful and immediately useful; Downer, Mt. Zogon, and The Portent--hilarious; the Workbook articles by Mr. Goodall, Hitchcock, and Logue--original and captivating; Mr. William's adventure--delightful; "The Hateful Legacy--I skip this for now, for one does not guzzle a fine wine; and turn to the "Prince of What's-his-name". I, of course, skip over all the dross for which so many trees so nobly and so fruitlessly gave their lives to be printed upon and turn to the author's bio to see if I can come to understand a bit this sad character who so strenuously tries to elicit the approval, nay praise, of the Dungeon reader. And what do I find? A transparent attempt at sympathy and gerrymandering of this contest in the form of shameless plea for support, allegedly from a woman who shares his surname and we can only reasonably conclude is his wife, or sister perhaps? To what depths must a man fall to drag the innocent into the sink of his depravity and force her to plead on his behalf--or worse yet invent a fictional "spouse" to stoop to this level.
Well, my vote-counting-challenged friend, you'll get no sympathy here from the enlightened masses that make up the messageboarders. You'll not find anyone willing to swallow that kool-aid. Shame! Shame I say! I only hope and pray that "Alison" truly is a figment of your demented imagination rather than a living breathing human being subjected to this disgrace. Wasn't there an Alison NPC in "The Devil Box"? I'll have to check and see.
Anyway, nice try my arch-nemesis. Your crocodile tears will get you nowhere. Besides, I hear that it has been unseasonably warm in Derbyshire lately.
I was going to challenge you to a Deathmatch for an upcoming issue Mr. V, but after reading this post I don't think I can take what you got to give. :-(
Its just sad desperation Nic. As you can see from the Age of Worms 'Prince of Redhand' posts (over where all the serious intellectual debating is going on), Redhand already has the moral highground and Hateful Lego-set (it IS good that title) is already dragging its feeble carcass into obscurity. Naturally as the young master your vote for Redhand will be crucial - huzzah, pip-pip and god save leg before wickets.
Contributor
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I was going to challenge you to a Deathmatch for an upcoming issue Mr. V, but after reading this post I don't think I can take what you got to give. :-(
Just turn him into an evil NPC in a first level adventure.
That way everyone who runs the adventure can kill him.(I know its a cheap shot Greg, but hey... you started with the flumph sarcasm, therefore I flumph in your general direction. )
Well Lads and Gents,
I just got the issue today and after giving it a thorough bathroom read, I must say it is no mean feat selecting the finest material from this issue's pages.
Beasts of the Autobahn looks like a lot of fun. Sadly I skimmed it quickly to get to the main event, but will peruse again soon at my leisure...
Hateful Lego-set has a lot going for it including amazing art on its interior "cover-page," a fantastic locale, awakened apes, a mud-baked evil druid mummy, and noxious gases (something I think every gamer can appreciate).
Price of Red Hash is equally entertaining, with a tickling retinue of quirky banquet guests, wonderfully detailed and fun events (I really like the "mini games" of the cockatrice fight, and the corallaxe shooting gallery...very Mario...and very fun), and of course the refreshing idea of an animating statue attacking the PCs.
But after all the careful consideration I am ready to vote on the finest the issue has to offer:
Micoplas Rogue's "Demented Dorks" (appearing in the Campaign Workbook all the way at the end of the magazine...saving the best for last Erik and James...nice choice) offers fifty great springboards for adventures, each of which, no doubt, proving far more satisfying than any of the three so-called "adventures" appearing in the issue.
There you have it. The young master's vote.
I think I am getting the hang of this shameless publicity thing. Thanks for the lesson Greg and Richard! :-)
Game.
Set.
Match, Mr. Logue.
I'll admit, I was really impressed by the concept of Cliff Dwelling Giants in Hateful Legacy. I mean that is not something you see every day. Giants living in a Mesa Verde type location. The only thing that would make it better would be to explore the Cliff Dwelling Giant's abode during some climatic event...say,...Oh I don't know...maybe an assault by a squadron of dragons or something... I don't know...All I'm saying is that Glitterdust isn't that bad of a spell...
Now, I'll have to get back to reading Hateful Legacy.
I have also enjoyed reading Prince of Redhand, and have noted that it is now much harder to vaporize the ghoul and blow up the island...and melting into goo...way better than ending up as roving undead.
But I'm not yet ready to declare a winner.
..Although the scales are tipping toward the DM that didn't have a Tar Dragon swallow my Half Ogre whole, only to have him barf him back out because I was doing more damage from inside the Dragon ;-)
ASEO out
Just so you know, he totally stole that from me.
the refreshing idea of an animating statue attacking the PCs.
Well, I beg to differ - that whole statue animating thing was my idea in the first place. And who invited that well known idea stealer Logue onto this board anyway? Never did trust his opinion - a bounder I heard - a damn bounder and a well known pilferer of honest decent upright chaps threads!
(ASEO vote for Redhand - vote, vote, vote... I will give you secrets from your next adventure...vote and all its mysteries will be yours...)
Rich
This one was pretty easy for me: Prince of Redhand wins it, eh, hands down.
(Why does this thread cause a person to devolve into childish puns?)
I guess the deciding factor for me was not buying the "Land of the Lost" feel of Hateful Legacy.
I prefer my Greyhawk sans dinosaurs, although I did love the idea of cliff dwelling Flan.
(Have you talked to James Ward, Greg? I saw he has been a regular poster on Dragonsfoot lately.)
(ASEO vote for Redhand - vote, vote, vote... I will give you secrets from your next adventure...vote and all its mysteries will be yours...)
Rich
ooohhh Bribery! I like where this is going.
Although I was reading part of Hateful Legacy to my 5 year old son. It was the description of the dead bear in the box canyon. “Daddy” he says , “What killed the bear?”
So I read a bit further.
“Well, It looks like it was killed by a Spinosaurus who lives in the valley.”
“But daddy” he replies, “Spinosaurus had needle like teeth that it used to t hold on to the fish it ate. One of my books even has a picture of fish skeletons inside of the tummy of a Spinosaurus fossil. They didn’t eat bears. Their teeth were not right for tearing meat, and they swallowed the fish whole”.
“Well son, there was a pretty bad movie a few years back that had a Spinosaurus chasing a bunch of people all over this island full of dinosaurs, and some people thought that was real cool. Besides, Having the big mean dinosaur be a T-Rex has been played out, so this is something different."
“Oh. That seems silly”.
“And you don’t have a problem with a mean monkey wearing armor and shooting arrows at the good guys”?
“Nope”.
“Let me show you how to roll up a character.”
ASEO out
Well, I beg to differ - that whole statue animating thing was my idea in the first place. And who invited that well known idea stealer Logue onto this board anyway? Never did trust his opinion - a bounder I heard - a damn bounder and a well known pilferer of honest decent upright chaps threads!
But I love you guys! :-)
You are both like the roleplaying fathers I never had! ;-)
I prefer my Greyhawk sans dinosaurs, although I did love the idea of cliff dwelling Flan.But adding dinosaurs to ANYTHING makes that thing better! As long as they're still called by their dinosaur names, that is, and not something silly...
Ouch! Nice shot. Somewhere Eberron is'a hurtin.
I prefer my Greyhawk sans dinosaurs, although I did love the idea of cliff dwelling Flan.But adding dinosaurs to ANYTHING makes that thing better! As long as they're still called by their dinosaur names, that is, and not something silly...
Right... because latin, even in a fantasy game where Rome never existed, is always cool. ;)
Can someone please tell me what a Flan is? Otherwise, I'll be forever picturing custard-like humanoids (with sweet sweet crunchy shells) shuffling around and mumbling with a vaguely spanish accent.
Can someone please tell me what a Flan is? Otherwise, I'll be forever picturing custard-like humanoids (with sweet sweet crunchy shells) shuffling around and mumbling with a vaguely spanish accent.
You and me both (Well, at least a few months). Apparently they are a relatively primative human culture found in Greyhawk. The fact that they taste like custard means monsters are always eating them.
GGG
Creative Director
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Right... because latin, even in a fantasy game where Rome never existed, is always cool. ;)I prefer my Greyhawk sans dinosaurs, although I did love the idea of cliff dwelling Flan.But adding dinosaurs to ANYTHING makes that thing better! As long as they're still called by their dinosaur names, that is, and not something silly...
Sure, I understand WHY they changed the names... but then, why didn't they change the word "dinosaur" which is itself latin? Or even better, why didn't they just translate the latin names into english? Therefore, you'd have terrible lizards with names like "Tyrant Lizard King" instead of "Swordtooth Titan". Honestly, I would rather have seen them leave dinosaurs out of Eberron entirely than include them with silly names.
Sure, I understand WHY they changed the names... but then, why didn't they change the word "dinosaur" which is itself latin? Or even better, why didn't they just translate the latin names into english? Therefore, you'd have terrible lizards with names like "Tyrant Lizard King" instead of "Swordtooth Titan". Honestly, I would rather have seen them leave dinosaurs out of Eberron entirely than include them with silly names.Right... because latin, even in a fantasy game where Rome never existed, is always cool. ;)I prefer my Greyhawk sans dinosaurs, although I did love the idea of cliff dwelling Flan.But adding dinosaurs to ANYTHING makes that thing better! As long as they're still called by their dinosaur names, that is, and not something silly...
Amazingly, the Talentan for dinosaur *is* "dinosaur." Sometimes I simply boggle at the way the universe works. ;)
I don't think "Swordtooth Titan" is any sillier than "Tyrant Lizard King" (I think they're bith pretty evocative actually). I guess we'll just have to disagree on this.
Can someone please tell me what a Flan is? Otherwise, I'll be forever picturing custard-like humanoids (with sweet sweet crunchy shells) shuffling around and mumbling with a vaguely spanish accent.You and me both (Well, at least a few months). Apparently they are a relatively primative human culture found in Greyhawk. The fact that they taste like custard means monsters are always eating them.
GGG
That's it? Primitive humans? Booorrrrring! *My* Flan will continue to be somewhat gelatinous -- soft, yet form-fitting -- and, of course, come in a variety of flavors.
Sure, I understand WHY they changed the names... but then, why didn't they change the word "dinosaur" which is itself latin? Or even better, why didn't they just translate the latin names into english? Therefore, you'd have terrible lizards with names like "Tyrant Lizard King" instead of "Swordtooth Titan".
Sounds like some choice animae titles though.
GGG
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What other words cause the online censorship to automatically kick in?
James "Pottymouth" Sutter revealed that he graduated Magna Cum Laude.
Happily, it only q-bert's the second letter + of the offending word. So if I told you "It was a Mongolian Cluster F*+~", you would be able to get the gist of what I was saying.
And let me also say that ASEO's son kicks ass!
What the h*** is going on ?!?! Go b@#*#& up somebody else's thread .
Ummmm! I'm telling mom!
What the h*** is going on ?!?! Custard humans..swordtooth titans... anything said by Pett?!?!? You're highjacking my thread that's what!
All of you off! Off I say! Go b*#%@* up somebody else's thread with your fruity-jello primitive humans (but only after you vote for Hateful Legacy).
Wow! All yours then. I'll be having my way with another thread if you need me.
Whoa, if you type b%!~@%, the messageboards automatically fill it in with little symbols.
That must be some nasty word.
I know what you mean Greg. I was referring to someone's idea about a unicorn becoming a paladin's special mount in an adventure on another thread and typed in unicorn-cum-paladin's mount. I guess they thought I was going for a lewder effect than a little latin flavor.
Sorry about hijacking the thread. Couldn't resist cause of the funny factor. Won't do it again. :-(
What the h*** is going on ?!?! Custard humans..swordtooth titans... anything said by Pett?!?!? You're highjacking my thread that's what!
All of you off! Off I say! Go b~&#*@ up somebody else's thread with your fruity-jello primitive humans (but only after you vote for Hateful Legacy).
How typical of Vain - sorry Vaughan - to betray a paucity in his vocabulary by swearing!
And as for you Logue - I have only two things to say to you -
H&&$$00ate and Gr&&$$!.
Huzzah!
How typical of Vain - sorry Vaughan - to betray a paucity in his vocabulary by swearing!
And as for you Logue - I have only two things to say to you -
H&&$$00ate and Gr&&$$!.Huzzah!
You know what Rich, next time you have something as crass and downright hurtful as this to say to me...I would prefer it does not appear on these boards!
Hexagonate and Griffin indeed!
Wait what happened to the censor feature?!?! F+#&!
How typical of Vain - sorry Vaughan - to betray a paucity in his vocabulary by swearing!
And as for you Logue - I have only two things to say to you -
H&&$$00ate and Gr&&$$!.Huzzah!
You know what Rich, next time you have something as crass and downright hurtful as this to say to me...I would prefer it does not appear on these boards!
Hexagonate and Griffin indeed!
Wait what happened to the censor feature?!?! f&~&!
Dude, it's like in that episode of South Park you can only say Hexagonate and Griffin if you are a Hexagonate and Griffin. Sheesh what a Griffin.
What?
No really, what?
GGG
How typical of Vain - sorry Vaughan - to betray a paucity in his vocabulary by swearing!
And as for you Logue - I have only two things to say to you -
H&&$$00ate and Gr&&$$!.Huzzah!
You know what Rich, next time you have something as crass and downright hurtful as this to say to me...I would prefer it does not appear on these boards!
Hexagonate and Griffin indeed!
Wait what happened to the censor feature?!?! f~*#!
It's rude round these parts.
What? There is a censor feature?!?! As the Ruler of my Couch I can only say...
That's Sofa King Lame ;-)
Unlike these two excellent adventures. Which are very impressive, and will definately see play in my games in the future.
ASEO out
The steel cage match is over? I just got my copy and was going to read it tonight. Oh well.