Disenchanter

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Organized Play Member. 117 posts. No reviews. No lists. No wishlists. 1 alias.


Liberty's Edge

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Well, if cocaine is statted up, I'd like to see it made and used by the Goblins. Because that would explain so very, very @#$&ing much.

Liberty's Edge

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MMCJawa wrote:
As far as love potions go...anytime you are playing with people's emotions, you stand a strong chance of getting burned. There is a reason the "Love Potion gone bad" is a popular trope in magical fiction. Some one downing a bottle could easily become obsessed with the target (ala Buffy), or if the wrong people drink it you could get into some seriously messed up situations (a short story in the Dresden Files Universe explore what happens when a love spell gets cast...on a pair of siblings). I could see a ton of plot threads that could easily spin off from the misuse of a love potion

That's kind of why I had an idea for an alternate love potion which, instead of forcing someone to fall in love with you, compels the drinker to go a certain way with a sort of unconscious "tug" to find someone they're likely to be compatible with. Sort of like the Luck Potion in Harry Potter.

Also, on a sillier note on this topic, anybody think there needs to be a High Level Bardic Performance called "It's Raining Men"? It'd involve a rain of deadly force constructs shaped like exactly what you'd think, with the enemies unable to take any actions for a certain amount of time due to the "Oh God What?!" nature of the piece. Like "Vengeful Gaze Of God" for the party Loony!

Liberty's Edge

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I'd also love to see a race of Mole-men based on the ones by John Hodgman. Yes, the one from the Daily Show.

You see, he wrote an awesome trilogy of books (Which you should all read as soon as possible) known as the Complete World Knowledge trilogy. And in the second book, "More Information Than You Requre," he talks about a race of mole-men.

And they are awesome, essentially a race of enlightened, powdered-wig wearing reptilian underground humanoids with acidic saliva, a coating of luminescent mucus and a system of government that inspired the founding fathers (The book goes into loving detail on the relationship between one of them and Thomas Jefferson)

That's not getting into the fact that they can change their gender, their strange relationship with The Great Century Toad that created the Earth, their parlament of vermin, their bizarre reproductive habits, their relationship to the Troglodytic Men and their many horrible steeds like the hoary chiggers, dirt pumas, pookas, dark newts, brain sharks, quick snails, man-eating clydesdales, iguana-like pseudosaurs, the list goes on.

I think they'd fit perfectly in Golarion, particularly in the Darklands. And speaking of Hodgman's works, Old Missus Crushgums from his third book "That Is All" so should be made into the Abolethic equivalent to a Nascent Demon Lord. And there needs to be a Hobo template with the power to summon duststorms and make hobo nickels.

Liberty's Edge

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Fromper wrote:

I just re-watched the movie Gremlins recently for the first time in at least 20 years (It's a Christmas movie!). That's how I see Pathfinder goblins. They're like the Three Stooges of evil.

And now I'm thinking of a Goblin Alchemist based on the Brain Gremlin from Gremlins 2. Best BBEG ever.

Liberty's Edge

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Speaking of which, the one thing that pisses me off about Golarion is that they do so much crowing and hawing about how racially inclusive they are, but they still cling to the "Monster races are always in-the-blood inherently evil and psychopathic" trope, even though it has even more unfortunate implications.

I can think of a few more ways to make the monster races threatening/antagonistic just off the top of my head without resorting to that lazy and ugly trope. And don't give me that nonsense of "They aren't human, so they don't share human morality", as I've never heard anybody arguing that for the other races.

Also, on player-race stereotypes, in my homebrew setting, Elves are relatively humble master chefs and Dwarves take more inspiration from Dwarf Fortress than Tolkien in that they are crazy; have no regard for their or others safety; and love ridiculous and impossible engineering projects.

Liberty's Edge

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By the way, on the topic of Undead in Golarion, I did have an idea for non-evil Positive Energy-based Undead that are way less wussy than WOTC's version.

You see, the effects of mixing Positive Energy with dead tissue are weird, giving the undead regenerative abilities, but leaving them in an eternal state of rotting and reforming, with skeleton's bones roiling like tumorous waves and zombies with flesh that is evermelting and reforming like candle wax.

They'd also be animated not by shoving their old soul in, but by creating a new "proto-soul" that grows and learns over time. They also have a propensity to mutate due to the weird influences of positive energy, but most "white necromancers" see that as a plus.

And, while I haven't figured out any Positive Energy variants for other intelligent Undead, Liches would be made via the wearer drinking some very specific concoctions of poison and, at the instant the drinker dies, a series of Positive Energy-infused pins they'd previously put into themselves release all their energy, turning him into the skeletal-with-melty-skin Positive Energy Lich. They wouldn't necessarily be Evil, but they would be a little loopy.

The in universe explaination as to why this isn't more common would be that it'd just been invented, and the Positive Energy Lich procedure is way harder than doing it the evil way. What do you folks think of that idea?

Also, in my homebrew setting that I'm slowly working on,, undead aren't inherently evil, though there is an Undead Mafia, because I like weird stuff.