Serpent God Statue

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170 posts. Alias of SMG Tabletop.


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Oleg harrumphs and turns to Oomlowt. "So, ya still wanna sell me th' rest a this stuff, then?"


Before setting off on your glorious adventures through the Greenbelt, you decide to let Oomlowt sell some stuff you forgot to sell yesterday.
His frail, thin, Kobold arms are ill-suited to the task of dragging the crate of pungent liquor, so Raido decides to help him, because Raido's a nice guy and I rolled a 2 on a d6. Gird also brings in the three crates, with little trouble.

Oleg looks a little upset that you did not bother with the exchange of goods for wealth yesterday while Gird was speaking with him, but he lets it go and begins his appraisal of the items you've given him.

Oleg's Appraisals:

Booze: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 = 4
Music Box: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 2 = 8
Crates [with furs!]: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (14) + 2 = 16
Bracers: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 2 = 3

Oleg concludes that the liquor is little-more than worthless bandit-moonshine, barely worth 20 coppers a bottle. The music box is likewise nothing more than a glorified keepsake, possibly from when one of the bandits was very young. The furs are all fairly excellent, and each crate is worth 60 gp.
The bracers are just rings of metal, and you'd be better off wearing them than selling them.


Hi, this thing still exists sometimes, imagine that! Let's start off small and just set up situational summaries, shall we?

Gird goes into the main building and chats with Oleg about how to handle the prisoners, among other things. It's a good quality chat. There's a lot of grouchy friendliness and respect. Cut from the same cloth those two. Sort of, kind of.
Gird leaves, having made a successful purchase and negotiated the transfer of prisoners, but her slightly elevated spirits are quickly dampened by that one priest guy asking her about temples and scary monsters.
As polite as possible, given the circumstances, Gird lets him know that they still haven't seen anything like that, but they will keep looking, Yeah, they are totally going to keep looking for that.

Meanwhile the gang just sort of awkwardly hangs at the cart. Dariya chews everyone's ear off with the same story of her slaying the dire wolf that she now wears on her back. By this point, the group has started to notice that the exact circumstances of the event vary from telling to telling. Thrae sulks, absentmindedly staring off in the direction of the nearest river [which is out of sight, so spooky] and murmuring to herself. Riado politely listens to Dariya's tale, nodding along. It looks like he's trying really hard to not looked stoned as hell. Poor guy, his face just does that by itself.
Oomlowt sits in the back of the cart with the bandits, absolutely fascinated by the young boy's proficiencies with cheap magic tricks. He is especially fond of the one that allows money to materialize from his fins. He must learn these secrets, post-haste.

Gir heads over and gets help from most of the group [Thrae doesn't pitch in, and Gird doesn't ask] in handing over the bandits to the guards around the fort. For now, they bandits are to help clean things up around the fort until it comes time to begin more serious public-works projects.

Then everyone relaxes for the rest of the day, sells some loot maybe, eats a hearty a meal, and early the following morning sets out back into the Greenbelt.

Where to now?


After slapping a bandit, you all manage to get some actual cooperation out of O'rett, who tells you the names of the bandits around you: the dead one was Bordrick, the one Thrae recently stopped eating was Kressle, and the two unconscious ones are the Jarvey brothers.
He also shows you around the camp and lets you take inventory of the cart, before suggesting using it to carry the Jarveys and the loot.
O'rett is a smart one.
Putting the loot in a spoiler to save on space.

The Loot:

321 sp
90 gp
Silver earrings
Wooden music box
Three crates of assorted furs and hides
A polished case of greenish liquor

The bandits went all out trying to lure people here.

So, you do just that and hook the cart up to Lockjaw [who is less than enthusiatic about it] before heading back to Oleg's to drop off your prisoners.
Along the way, the Jarveys wake up to find Oomlowt perched over them, crossbow in hand. With all of your prisoners awake, you attempt to get more information out of them regarding their leader who, to your surprise, was not Kressle, but another figure known as "The Stag Lord". Here is what the bandits had to say about him and his operation:

Cose: “The Stag Lord keeps a strange old man locked up in the basement. I suspect the old guy might actually be running the show, using the Stag Lord as a puppet, you know. I got a look into the old guy’s eyes once, and it terrified me. He ain't someone I'd want to cross.”

O'rett: “The Stag Lord is a bloody drunk. All that booze in the cart’s for him. He's half of what he used to be, and ain’t never been right in the head. A few weeks ago he punched my horse for spittin' in the yard. Personally, I wouldn't care if he dropped dead tomorrow, but even drunk out of his mind he's still got a fair amount of fight to him.”

Connor Jarvey: “Our boss is a monster of a man. Calls himself the Stag Lord. He’s a deadeye with the bow, and I saw him crush a prisoner’s hand to mush in one fist. Come to think of it, I’ve never seen him without his creepy stag helmet on — some of my friends think he ain’t got no face under it, but not me — I think that creepy helm is his face!”

Dobson Jarvey: “It’s hard keeping track of who’s working for the boss, so we use a master phrase as a sort of password to get in to the fort on the northeast shore of the Tuskwater. Unless it’s been changed recently, the current phrase is, ‘By the Bloody Bones of St. Gilmorg, who wants to know?’ And no, I have no idea who ‘St. Gilmorg’ is.”

It is enlightening, to say the least. Also I'm lazy and just copy-pasta'd wholecloth because I'm a rebel.

It takes you a day and a half to get back to Oleg's with the prisoners, it is early in the morning on the 14th of Gozran. What do you do?

And now for XP rewards!
Everyone gets 350 XP for incapcitating five bandits and Kressle, bringing OOmlowt and Gird's totals up to 4126 XP and everyone else up to 3900 XP! Also everyone regens 4 HP for two nights of rest.

If there were any additional conversations you wanted to RP from the trip to Oleg's such as scolding or whatever, just start them below with an OOC comment letting me know that's happening. If not, jump right into the buying and selling of goods, as well as the delivery of prisoners.


The younger bandit just whimpers as you tie him up, but as you move to the older man, he shakes his head and simply says, "I'm not gunna run. Just stop yer dog over there, and I'll tell you everything you need to know, and come along on your little field trip." He gives you a slightly smarmy look, "I feel like we're going to be fast friends, I'm O'rett and the boy is Cose." He pauses a moment before continuing, "Do you want me to introduce all of the corpses, too?"
What a smarta**.

O'rett has never seen a hyena before, and chances are, neither has Thrae, seeing as where the River Kingdoms are. It is possible that either of them has seen a Hyenadon, but that is still slightly unlikely.


I figured I should stop neglecting the poor bandits.

The standing bandit looks up at this, "Oh yes, please! Don't leave me with that Gnoll or Kobold, I'll do anything! You can have our booze, our gold, please, anything! Don't let the Gnolbold eat meeeee-HEE-EEEEEEE!
He promptly breaks down into a sobbing mess groveling ever closer to Gird's feet.

Meanwhile the other bandit grumbles and sits on a log, he is much older-looking than his screaming colleague, maybe in his mid-forties. He looks like he's seen more than one change in administration.
So, he just sniffs and spits into the creek, worrying Oomlowt's bloody crossbow-bolt in his hands.
You didn't even notice him pull that out, what a pro.


ROUND 11

Secret Rolls:

I decided to roll these myself because of reasons.

Bandit1 Fall damage I forgot: 2

Bandit2 Acrobatics: 19+1= 20

19 Bandits: Two of the bandits stop running, one slinking out of the bushes, Oomlowt's crossbow bolt sticking out of his side. He is whimpering and staying low to the ground, but moving in your direction obediently, anyway. Meanwhile, the bandit who fell out of the tree pulls himself up, wincing as he steadies himself before weakly pleading, "Please don't shoot me! I want to live, brave masters!"
The other sniper leaps the rest of the way down the tree, doing a neat tuck and roll before vanishing into the trees. He is such a sneak, or at least you assume it's a he. It is very hard to tell in the shadows.
The other bandit is presumably long gone as well.

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: Two of the bandits are begging you for mercy, this is good! You have half a mind to deny them such a luxury, but your common sense gets the better of you and you decide these men might be useful, at least temporarily. You can always make up for lost body count later.
So you lower your crossbow and call out to the bandits already dashing away, urging them to come back or pay the consequences. You bring your crossbow back up for emphasis.
There is no response aside from some sobbing thank yous.

17 Kressle: Kressle is very much dead, and is about to be hardcore desecrated by a very rude Gnoll.

13 Oomlowt: You know a lot about bandits, and you're fairly certain that the fleeing bandits will no longer be a problem. Their leader is dead, and you've never known bandits to be the most loyal of folk.
So, to prove how much you are not like a normal bandit, you dart over towards Gird and ask her how she's doing, because you could have sworn that her throat had been cut for a second there.

12 Raido: Raido is currently unconscious, but he'll be right as rain soon enough!

11 Thrae: You marvel at your Gnollish strength and the rivulets of blood streaming from the woman's punctured neck. You even show off the gun show briefly before getting down to business. You rip your trident free from the bandits neck [aw **** you're gonna have to clean that later] and stick it in the ground before kneeling next to the bandit's body. You raise one of her right arms and let out a small giggle before everyone hears the audible crunch of bone as you begin to gnaw on the limb, like nay good Gnoll with rumblies in her tumblies.
There are looks of shock, disgust, and crushing defeat from all around.
What's everyone's deal, it's just a little after-battle reward?

3 Gird: There is far too much **** going on right now for you to really focus on what Thrae is doing, you're still caught on that ****ed up dream. As a result you are very preoccupied when you lean down and heal Raido, and you barely hear Oomlowt.

I declare combat over, unless you really want to hunt down those two fleeing bandits [I wouldn't]. Activate Generic RP blob posts! I'll reveal more of the map when it becomes important.

Updated Map


ROUND 10

Secret Rolls:

Bandit7 Stabilize: 1d20 + 1 - 11 ⇒ (2) + 1 - 11 = -8

Kressle Stabilize: 1d20 + 2 - 11 ⇒ (12) + 2 - 11 = 3

Bandit1 Climb Check: 1d20 + 1 - 5 ⇒ (11) + 1 - 5 = 7

Bandit2 Climb Check: 1d20 + 1 - 5 ⇒ (20) + 1 - 5 = 16

Bandit1 Fall Damage: 1d6 ⇒ 4

19 Bandits: You wouldn't be able to tell, but the bandit-turned-bonfire has expired. The rest don't even exchange looks before scrambling into the woods. They are seriously trying to run for their lives. You can hear a loud curse followed by a thud as a Bandit falls from a tree, his bow snapping as he hits the ground. A mumble for mercy can be heard from his general direction.
Across the bank, another sniper is shimmying down the tree with more success, already he is almost as the bottom.

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: Yes! You can add that b**** to your list of kills and accomplishments [mostly kills right now, but it's a work in progress]! Meanwhile you can pad the kill side more with these cowardly bandits! You throw your flail to the ground and unclip your Crossbow from Lockjaw's saddle. The poor dear has been working so hard lately, you figure you should give him a break.
You aim for the bandit moving into the treeline, but your bolt misses as the terrified man ducks into the underbrush. Phooey.

17 Kressle: Kressle is bleeding out, Dariya got her real good!

13 Oomlowt: Yes! Those bolts are so hardcore! You really need to ask about the Sootscales' supplier sometime.
However, right now you have a limited supply, so you decide it would eb fore the best to save them. So you load a normal bolt into your crossbow and fire at the same bandit Dariya missed, scoring a wicked hit in the thug's side!
The man squeals like a pig and falls over, whimpering.

12 Raido: Raido is taking a little bit of a rest, everyone should just calm down and relax. Maybe take a nap. The sound of the creek is quite nice, after all.

11 Thrae: You let out a glorious victory cackle as Dariya brains the ladybandit. You need your allies to do things so you don't have to, and that Hanspur-damned woman took out too many for comfort. So, like any self-respecting Gnoll, you sidle over to the woman's prone form and raise your trident high... before slamming all three of its points into the woman's neck, spraying your boots in blood and causing an awful gurgling noise.
Yeah, if she wasn't already dead, she is now.

3 Gird: Wow... uh, what happened? Was that some sort redneck Erastil Heaven? Gods, you hope not. You really don't want to fight bears when you're dead.
You groan and get up, slipping your hand under your armor to heal up your back, which ends up feeling ooky. You shudder and start stumbling towards Kressle in time to see Thrae jam her trident deep into the b****'s neck.
You hope to Erastil that that means it's over.

Updated Map


ROUND 9

Secret Rolls:

Bandit1 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 2 = 22

Bandit1 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 5 [X3 = 15]

Bandit2 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 2 = 3

Bandit2 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 8

Bandit4 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 2 = 7

Bandit4 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 2

Bandit5 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5

Bandit5 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 8

Bandit7 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 2 = 8

Bandit7 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 5

Kressle Stabilize Roll: 1d20 + 2 - 10 ⇒ (3) + 2 - 10 = -5

Oomlowt Crossbow Bonus: 1d6 ⇒ 6

Bandit1 Crit Confirm Roll [manual]: [12+2] 14

19 Bandits: The bandits look a little nervous. Some of them exchange worried glances, and their scruffy lips seem to almost quiver. Regardless, during the usual barrage of arrows, one of the bandits manages to snipe Raido, burying a wicked arrow in the poor Tengu's chest. He falls to the ground with a feeble caw, his breathing ragged.
Raido is at negative one hit points!

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: Oh no she didn't. That lady looked like she knew her way around a battlefield, and you could use some extra muscle around here! You push Lockjaw in the direction of the axe-lady and lift your flail. Your wolf closes in quickly, and you peg the woman in the side of the head, mangling her ear and jaw. At the same time, Lockjaw captures her stumbling legs in his jaws and twists violently, sending her slamming into the rocky bank.
She's not going to be so smug if she wakes up.

17 Kressle: Kressle is preoccupied bleeding out into the brook. She also failed to stabilize, and loses another hitpoint.

13 Oomlowt: Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes! The gods answered your prayer [you have decided it was definitely a prayer]! Maybe that whole Calistria thing Woden talked about wasn't that bad.
Thus bolstered, you gleefully load a red bolt into your crossbow and pop a bolt into the bandit across the way.
The bolt sails for the bandit's shoulder, but it doesn't so much bury itself in his flesh as it burns its way in, exploding into a bright inferno.
The flash was momentarily dazzling, but as your eyes recover, you can see the bandit belly-up under the tree, flames still licking his armor and the tree's trunk.
Those are some good crossbow bolts.

12 Raido: 1d20 + 1 - 1 ⇒ (18) + 1 - 1 = 18
You are not dying.

11 Thrae: You grumble to yourself about how Gird should at least have the courtesy to die if she's going to go down. Or, even better, be a better tank so that you don't have to do any work.
Regardless you let the power of Hanspur flow out of your hand and into Gird, healing the Half-Orc's wounds with the familiar smell of river bottom and blood.

3 Gird:

Gird's Eyes Only:

Your head is pounding and your throat hurts, but you open your eyes anyway. You are in a patch of brambles, and at first you don't want to get up. But, as you sit there, you can feel a faint pull to the west. You carefully get up, not noticing that your armor shines like new.
After slipping through the brambles less than gracefully, you stumble into an awe-some clearing. It is dominated by a loomin, upthrust ridge of rock topped with moss. The side facing you has been carved into the likeness of an immense elk, with antlers drooping down from its weathered face to frame a gargantuan cave. Steps lead up to this same cave from a 50-foot pool caked with algae. Both the steps and elk look quite old, and are generously coated with moss. The clearing itself is framed by many crumbling stone pillars [you can see at least ten, in various states of decay].
****, you really hope this isn't what awaits the faithful of Erastil in the afterlife. You can feel the connection this place has to your god deep in your gut.
Despite your aversion, you casually shuffle around the clearing, ending up at the edge of the pool. You decide you've been doing too much walking lately, and sit on the pool's rim. You absentmindedly dip your finger in to swirl the algae around, but as soon as your finger hits the water, your surroundings change.
The water is pristine and the stone appears freshly cut. There is not forest detritus spilling into the clearing, and the pillars are whole, supporting a beautifully carved wooden roof. You can see various harvest supplies piled in corners, some being carted by priests. It is but a glimpse, though, as the illusion is shattered by a pained roar from the cave. A huge, crazed looking bear rumbles out of the cave and locks eyes with you.
You attempt to flee, like an sensible person, but find yourself unable to. The bear rushes you, flecks of foam coming from its still roaring mouth. As it barrels into you, you can suddenly smell blood and... mud? The throbbing in your head subsides, and your throat doesn't hurt as much and suddenly the bear is gone and all you can see is Thrae's hyena face.

You have had more restful naps.

Updated Map


ROUND 8

Secret Rolls:

Bandit1 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (9) + 2 = 11

Bandit1 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 5

Bandit2 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (13) + 2 = 15

Bandit2 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 8

Bandit4 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 = 4

Bandit4 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 4

Bandit5 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (8) + 2 = 10

Bandit5 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 7

Bandit7 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 2 = 7

Bandit7 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 4

Kressle Attack1: 1d20 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 5 + 2 = 27

Kressle Attack2: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (18) + 5 = 23

Kressle Damage1: 1d6 + 3 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 3 + 2 = 8

Kressle Damage2: 1d6 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3

Kressle Crit Confirm: [had to roll manually because the forums just used the same result as the above roll; the new total was 15, Gird almost died.]

Dariya AoO: 1d20 + 2 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 2 + 1 + 2 = 25

Lockjaw AoO: 1d20 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (9) + 2 + 1 = 12

19 Bandits: The bandits all let loose another volley of arrows, but fortunately they all miss their mark.

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: You see Gird's injury and feel a pang of sympathy pain before charging the lady with the axes. You figure that if you can take her out the rest of the bandits may stop attacking long enough to subdue more easily. You close the distance and peg her squarely in the side with your flail! The woman grunts, and you can see red begin to faintly stain her armor. Lockjaw also lunges at her, but he doesn't find a good purchase on her thigh armor, and his teeth slide ineffectually off.
The woman smiles and readies her gleaming axes...

17 Kressle: Before feinting past Dariya and her mighty wolf, deftly dodging past surprised swipes. She then closes the distance between her and the stuttering Gird, who is beginning to raise a hand to her throat, bubbling something about fleshwounds. The woman's eyes dart towards Raido, who seems ready to fight back. She quickly adjusts her axes and descends on the two adventurers. Her first axes comes at Gird perpendicular to her spine, while the second axe mirrors the motion. It nicks Raido, giving him a deep cut on his right arm dealing 3 points of damage.
...However, the first axe rips across Gird's back, causing blood to spill all over the bandit in a warm spray, dealing 8 points of damage!. Gird stumbles and falls to the ground, panting heavily as blood continues to flow from her neck and mouth. The bandit lets out a small, "Yes!" Her voice is deep for a woman, and very quiet, but it commands absolute attention.
She then turns towards Raido, and raises both axes, sticky with blood, and smiles, her voice is barely above a whisper, but it seems like she is yelling, "You're next, beakhead."

13 Oomlowt: You watch in a sort of helpless shock as Gird falls to the ground, and you begin to plead to any god that will listen. It's pretty pathetic, but you're a Kobold, and Kobold's are not known for their composure.
Your whining done, you level your Crossbow, and fire it directly at the awful woman who felled Gird. The bolt strikes the woman in the collar, and you can here her stifled scream of pain. She almost looks worried now.
Good, only you know the hells you will put her through.

12 Raido: You squawk in surprise and grief before doing the only thing you can think of.
You charge the awful bandit with your "beakhead."
Unfortunately, she manages to easily dodge, despite her pretty awful wounds.

11 Thrae: Well, things have gone to hells without you, it's time to intervene. At least the Orc seems to be breathing. You wouldn't want to eat that.
This woman with the axes, though, she will be much more filling.
You lick your muzzle in anticipation and brandish your Trident as you stalk towards her.
You've even brought a fork...

3 Gird: Erastil, that ****ing hurts like a mother****ing ***** **** ****rag. What the hells is that woman's problem? At least she had the decency to bring your hands closer to your neck. Your thoughts begin to slip, but a final rush of adrenaline rushes from somewhere deep in the back of your head. You grip the dagger in one hand and rip it from your throat, gurgling and wheezing as your lungs stop functioning properly. You shakily grasp your neck with your free hand and let Erastil's power flow through it, rejoicing as you begin to breathe again.
Void begins to take you as you begin to slump over. You think you mumble something about fleshwounds just before the stream completely vanishes, and in its place there are only dreams.
We'll talk about that later, k?
Also, also, Gird is automatically stabilized because of magical healing and her cuts aren't, you know, bleeding all over everything anymore, so you know, that's cool?

Maybe I'm forgetting something, but that was almost very different, so I'm kind of done with this Round, yikes.

Updated Map


ROUND 7

Secret Rolls:

Bandit1 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (7) + 2 = 9

Bandit1 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 8

Bandit2 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14

Bandit2 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 6

Bandit4 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (15) + 2 = 17

Bandit4 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 4

Bandit5 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (9) + 2 = 11

Bandit5 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 2

Bandit7 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14

Bandit7 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 7

Kressle Attack: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (19) + 3 = 22

Kressle Damage: 1d4 + 3 ⇒ (4) + 3 = 7

Kressle Crit Confirm: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (17) + 3 = 20

19 Bandits: The bandits continue to focus fire on Dariya, but only the bandit directly across from her manages to strike a hit, which would be relatively minor if Dariya wasn't already a living pin-cushion, she takes 4 points of damage!

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: You decide all of this being-shot-at business isn't nearly as fun and heroic as you thought. You decide that you'd rather get in close with the dagger-lady, who is pretty clearly the authority figure, here.
So, you move Lockjaw in that direction, and ready your flail. This bandit's goin' doooown.

17 Kressle: Kressle looks Dariya up and down before smirking, She then whips around lightning fast, chucking her dagger with the same sort of disinterested precision as before.
Except this time, Gird gets a dagger in her throat. It seems to have missed the really important things, maybe, but there is a lot of blood. Really, there is blood sort of gurgling from Gird's mouth and out of the dagger. No matter how it heals, that's probably going to leave a scar.
Kressle just smiles wider as her hands go for the hatchets at her belt.

13 Oomlowt: You thank Thrae for her healing, which was refreshing. Sort of like having someone dunk cold water on you to clear your head Although, in this case, you have the sneaking suspicion that it is more like your head was dunked into the water.
You quickly decide to ignore that, and focus on the combat, There will be plenty of time to ponder the theological symbolism inherent in your companion's magic.
So you dart out from behind your cart to fire on the bandit, but as you're aiming you notice Gird's bloody face! Not her, too!
You miss.

12 Raido: That... was not good! You squawk words of encouragement as you hobble over to place yourself between the meatshields. You wish you hadn't used your last cure spell on yourself, but, these things happen, so might as well give some of that life back through combat!

11 Thrae: You brush off Oomlowt's thanks, and work on assessing the situation. It's much easier to direct others in combat, rather than actively participate. You're rarely in the same kind of danger.
So you peek over the cart and check out Kressle. She smells like a human, but you're pretty sure the rest of them could figure that out. Other than that, it looks like she has run out of daggers. And judging by the state of Gird's face, she seems to have something against orcs, not that you blame her. Orcs are too loud, smelly, and violent for any self-respecting Gnoll.
You have not learned as much as you had hoped.

3 Gird: Holy **** that ****ing smarts like a ****ing **** ***** ****! You try to hiss at the godsdamned knife lady, but it comes out as an aggressive gurgle. Even though the pain is almost unbearable, you leave the dagger in your throat. For all you know, it could the the only thing holding you together right now.
Instead you desperately fire off an arrow, while starting to shuffle away from the nasty-lady and towards a place you can ask for Erastil's divine health.
You turn your head away, even as your arrow pierces Kressle's upper bicep.

Updated Map


ROUND 6

Secret Rolls:

Bandit1 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (10) + 2 = 12

Bandit1 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 8

Bandit2 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (7) + 2 = 9

Bandit2 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 5

Bandit4 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (19) + 2 = 21

Bandit4 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 6

Bandit5 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 2 = 3

Bandit5 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 3

Bandit7 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (13) + 2 = 15

Bandit7 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 6

Kressle Attack: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (10) + 3 = 13

Kressle Damage: 1d4 + 3 ⇒ (4) + 3 = 7

Bandit6 Stabilization Check: 1d20 + 1 - 1 ⇒ (14) + 1 - 1 = 14

19 Bandits: The bandits all look at the second fallen bandit and back at Dariya, before exchanging looks among themselves. They nod and focus their fire on Dariya. They all miss except for one, who scores a killer joint shot, dealing 6 points of damage!

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: Hmmph, you'll show them to fear you. You raise your flail in the air and start twirling it while shouting at the bandits. However, it's hard to keep the momentum going on the flail and it flails around rather than spins.
And your Halfing shouts are not quite as intimidating as you'd like.
Lockjaw looks pretty intimidating, though. That has to count for something, right?

17 Kressle: The woman, casually flicks another dagger in a general-Gird direction, this one barely missing Gird's hair as it sails past and into the creek. This time however, the lady quietly curses before quickly pulling out yet another knife.

13 Oomlowt: Wowch, you were not expecting that! After snarling some choice words, you quickly fire your crossbow at the bandit across the way, managing to spit the poor soul's leg!

12 Raido: Not paying attention to the battle going on around you, you rip the arrow out and use your healing magic on yourself.
It sure is lucky that literally all of the spells you prepared this morning were healing spells.

11 Thrae: Wow, that tiny lizard can't use any real curses? That's awful. You'd at least expect, like, a Mothermonster out of him, or possibly a Cacklebrain, but none of this "mother pussbucket" nonsense.
Whatever, you decide you'd better go heal him, he looks small and squishy.
So calling on the power of your god, you kneel beside Oomlowt and let the rage of the drowned rat bubble up and through your body, spilling out of your hand and into Oomlowt's wound.
It feels like white-water rafting.

3 Gird: Creepy lady has chucked two knives at you, and that last one was too close for comfort. It's time to bring it to this smug piece of sh*t.
So you bring up your bow and fire, only for the woman to casually duck.
That could have gone better.

Whoops forgot to change the status of the second downed bandit to stabilized, whoops.
Also, we're gonna have to talk about preparing spells, here, but I'm letting it slide this combat because wow I messed that up.

Updated Map


ROUND 5

Secret Rolls:

Bandit1 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (14) + 2 = 16

Bandit1 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 6

Bandit2 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (19) + 2 = 21

Bandit2 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 4

Bandit4 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (11) + 2 = 13

Bandit4 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 6

Bandit5 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (19) + 2 = 21

Bandit5 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 7

Bandit6 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (17) + 2 = 19

Bandit6 Damage: 1d6 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 1 = 7

Bandit7 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (13) + 2 = 15

Bandit7 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 1

Kressle Attack: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (1) + 3 = 4

Kressle Damage: 1d4 + 3 ⇒ (3) + 3 = 6

Dariya attack: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (12) + 5 = 17

Dariya Damage: 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5

Lockjaw Attack: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (20) + 3 = 23

Lockjaw damage: 1d6 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2

Mounted Combat: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (16) + 9 = 25

19 Bandits: The bandits use their cover to unleash a volley of arrows on all of you, dealing 7 points of damage to Dariya, 6 points of damage Raido, and 4 points of damage to Oomlowt! A chorus of jeers can be heard after each hit, and the bandits who miss are often yelled at, but in a friendly way, you guess?
Which doesn't bode entirely well for you.
The angrysad bandit swipes at Lockjaw with his shortsword, but Dariya manages to guide her steed out of harms way, pulling her arm back for another swing...

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: Which bludgeons the poor man in the face again, sending him crumpling to the ground! You congratulate yourself and pat Lockjaw on the head when he stops mid lunge.
You're going to beat all of these losers down.

17 Kressle: This strange woman and her commanding presence both smile smugly and she casually chucks a knife at gird, not even paying attention to whether or not it hits [it doesn't], simply laughing at the men around her and going for another knife.

13 Oomlowt: Ouch! That really stings! You have no idea where that arrow came from, but a new bandit has shown up, and you're itching to unload some crossbow bolts into his soft, pink ape-flesh [seriously why can't these humans have scales like normal creatures?]!
Unfortunately, the tree in front of him takes the blow. Cover is the worst when it isn't yours.

12 Raido: Holy g-o-double d that smarts! You'll have to deal with that later, now is the time for buffing teammates!
You amble over to Gird, because Dariya can obviously take care of herself, even if she gave you a hasty thank you.
You repeat your magic hands on Gird, who gives you a smart comment of how it was just arrows, nothing serious. She's such a jokester, for sharks.
What a card, that Gird.

11 Thrae: The new chick with the axes looks like bad news. In fact, she looks a little too much like competition for number one bad*ss around here, and you aren't about to give that title up.
So you move forward, next to the cart, and pull out your trident to show you mean business.
You snarl for good measure.

3 Gird: Wow, you feel good as new, thanks to that bird-man. Good as new and ready to bring the hurt on silly bandit snipers. You try for an awesome one-liner to prove you mean business, but unfortunately, your shot is lost in the canopy.
Cover sucks.

Updated Map


ROUND 4

Secret Rolls:

Bandit1 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14

Bandit1 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 6

Bandit2 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14

Bandit2 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 8

Dariya Attack: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (17) + 5 = 22

Dariya Damage: 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5

Lockjaw Attack: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (9) + 3 = 12

Lockjaw Damage: 1d6 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2

Bandit3 Stabilization Check: 1d20 + 1 - 1 ⇒ (17) + 1 - 1 = 17

19 Bandits: Those are definitely bandits spilling out of the treeline - like daisies! They mostly sneer or snarl, but a few snag some cover behind the trees and ready their bows.
However, one bandit lets out a pained cry and leaps over the log, sword drawn, ready to defend the crumpled and bleeding body Lockjaw left there. They were probably brothers or something.
A couple more arrows come out of nowhere, one striking the cart near Oomlowt and the other hitting the ground at Gird's feet.

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: More meat for the mangler! Wait no, that's a terrible title. Dariya the mangler, nobody would think you're a hero if you're "the mangler". You'll have to give this more thought later.
Right now, you've got a foolish man who's crying for no good reason just begging to be pegged in the face with your flail, and you see no reason to deny him that.
So your flail clocks him on the head, knocking out a few teeth, and causing the poor man to stumble a little, saving him from Lockjaw's gnashing teeth.

17 Kressle: After the flow of bandits has ebbed, another, a woman dressed in yellowed armor casually walks out of the treeline, calmly flipping and catching an axe as she does so. She then smirks and leans on a log, putting the axe on her belt, and pulling out one of four wicked looking daggers.

13 Oomlowt: You scuttle around the cart, looking for a better terget, as well as better cover from that arrow. You scan the treeline, and see that there is a man trying very hard to hide himself in the leaves of one of the trees, fumbling with his bow and an arrow all the while.
Naughty, naughty.

12 Raido: You hop over the rest of the creek and shuffle towards Dariya, who is smiling dangerously. She must be really heroic.
So she can continue being really heroic, you whip out your magic hands and call on the power of nature to condense into a simple healing spell. It's tough work, getting something as big and beautiful and terrible as nature to cooperate, but you're a druid, you're used to stuff like that.
Tapping Dariya so that the spell can do its thing is another matter entirely, and you have trouble getting her while her mount and her fidget around.

11 Thrae: You very kindly and very casually say that inform the group that there is a tricky man hiding in the trees, but it seems like nobody hears you.
Fine, whatever, you didn't like these guys anyway.

3 Gird: You watch the one bandit collapse, and are a little annoyed that the little idiot can rush into a trap and still manage to come out on top.
You're still going to yell at her later, maybe.
Right now you've got to focus on keeping yourself alive, so you pull the arrow out of your shoulder, and look for the bandit Thrae was talking about. Oh, there he is, hiding on that little wooden platform.
What a baby.

Updated Map


ROUND 3

Secret Rolls:

Bandit1 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (19) + 2 = 21

Bandit1 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 3

Bandit2 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (7) + 2 = 9

Bandit2 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 7

Bandit3 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14

Bandit3 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 1

Dariya Attack: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (11) + 5 = 16

Dariya Damage: 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5

Lockjaw Attack: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (13) + 3 = 16

Lockjaw Damage: 1d6 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5

19 Bandits: More arrows sail through the air, but this time, one hits Gird dealing 3 points of damage!
Honestly it's mostly impressive that the bandit Dariya's got boxed in didn't hit her, but maybe he was just getting cocky.
We might not ever know.
And... are those more Bandits coming from the treeline?

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: Dariya on the other hand, ain't having none of that, and orders Lockjaw to attack. Her mighty wold descends on the poor bandit, and the crunch of bone is sickeningly audible. The poor man screams as Lockjaw drags him to the ground, shaking violently, until Dariya gently stops him.
Lockjaw drops the crying man at once, allowing Dariya to give him a nasty blow, knocking the poor guy blissfully unconscious.

17 Kressle: Gosh, what a mysterious mystery.

13 Oomlowt: You move cautiously towards the cart, carefully looking for any traps that might be a part of it's design.
And that's when you catch a glint of serrated steel through a hole in the wood. As you get even closer, you realize that there is a bear trap stealthily tucked underneath all the sweet loot.
But the cart itself looks safe enough to use as cover, so you do just that.
And you haven't been stabbed or set on fire yet, so that's a good sign.

12 Raido: No one here is getting any younger, but some of them are getting much deader, so you decide to go give Dariya some support.
You are a birdman of the wild, so you're sure that whatever these strangely aggressive men have in store won't be able to inconvenience you so much here.
Hiba has different ideas and gets the hells out of Absalom.

11 Thrae: You half-heartedly look around you, and oh my... it looks like someone is being naughty and hiding in one of the trees. He's about... 20 feet off of the ground, on a wooden platform hidden behind some leaves. He's currently got his bow out, trying for another shot.
Not exactly the stealthiest guy around.

3 Gird: You can't believe how incompetent these new adventures are. They're practically greenhorns! You haven't been a wandering paladin all that long, and you have years of experience over them! It really rustles your jimmies.
At least the creek manages to cool you down a bit, so that was nice.

Updated Map


ROUND 2

Secret Rolls:

Bandit1 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 2 = 7

Bandit1 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 8

Bandit2 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (7) + 2 = 9

Bandit2 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 4

Bandit3 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (16) + 2 = 18

Bandit3 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 5

Bandits1 and 3 have used 2 arrows, while Bandit2 has used 1

19 Bandits: Two more arrows slice through the air, landing at Lockjaw's feet, but failing to strike him or his rider. The bandit behind the log jumps from his cover again, sending an arrow into Dariya's other shoulder, dealing 5 points of damage! The arrow has wedged itself between two pieces of armor, which have forced it deeper than the other one.

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: You urge Lockjaw towards the bandit behind the log, your mighty steed covers the distance quickly, his teeth bared in a fierce snarl.
You're gonna bash in some heads, and it's gonna be awesome.

17 Kressle: Who?

13 Oomlowt: You slink up to the cart, but your shorter legs leaves you behind your larger companions. You'll show them, though. You'll show them that you're the best sniper this team has ever had!
And then they will respect you. As their best friendleader.

12 Raido: You shrug and shuffle up with the rest of the group, but slowly. The forest is lush, and you can't help but admire the unfettered nature around you. It's calming.
Hiba disagrees.

11 Thrae: You stalk forward, your teeth showing and your trident ready. If this gets ugly, you're going to show these losers just how dangerous a Gnoll can be.
You just hope you don't lose your cool and start laughing. That would be embarrassing.

3 Gird: Sexually frustrated bushes have to wait, because there is a midget whose in need of a beating. Preferably from you. After she kills all of those bandits [you're fairly sure they're bandits, I mean, they're like cookie-cutters of those dudes at Oleg's]. And you've taken all the loot in the cart.
Then you'll beat her.
You move up to the cart, ready to pull out your longbow and give Dariya some cover fire.

Updated Map


ROUND 1

Secret Rolls:

Thunderstone Toss: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (11) + 2 = 13

Bandit1 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (16) + 2 = 18

Bandit1 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 4

Gird Will Save: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (18) + 5 = 23

Bandit1 stealth check: 1d20 + 2 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 + 2 = 6

Bandit2 Stealth check: 1d20 + 2 + 2 ⇒ (13) + 2 + 2 = 17

Bandit3 Attack: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14

Bandit3 Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 5

19 Bandits: You don't see anything, but as Dariya approaches the cart, a small object sails through the air, and strikes the ground next to the cart, splintering the wood, and making a very large bang. The sound is so loud you can hear it clearly sixty feet down the path.
Dariya doesn't let is stop he though, and starts bringing Lockjaw around to the open end of the cart. However, as she nears it, an arrow sticks her in the shoulder, dealing 4 points of damage!
Then a man dressed in wood-stained leather armor comes up from behind a log and fires at Dariya! However, he misses and ducks back down behind the log.

18 Dariya and Lockjaw: Wow! That sure is... exciting! Finally, you have a chance to prove you're a true hero to all of those greenhorns back there.
You reach the cart and look inside. You can see some crates, no doubt full of gold, as well as bags of spare silver and gold pieces. Two ornate wooden boxes are also stacked in the cart, and one is finely polished.

17 Kressle: Who/what is Kressle, and why is he/she/it involved here?

13 Oomlowt: You see Dariya get pegged by the arrow, but do when you whip your crossbow up to counter attack!
But you're not quite sure where the shot came from, but you have a pretty good idea... you just need to look a little more closely before firing.
However, you can see the other bandit just fine, and fire at him. But he's too far away, and your shot goes wide. You'll have to move in a little closer to do any real damage to him.

12 Raido: It's a long walk to the cart, so instead of moving on up, you try to give some sage advice.
It didn't come out right.

11 Thrae: The little person is an idiot, the bird-man is an idiot, and you don't even know what that idiot of a Half-Orc is doing. What's so interesting about those bushes that she can't focus on the fight going on right in front of her?
Whatever, you've got your trident out, and you're pretty sure you can take whatever is thrown at you.

3 Gird: You were set to fight, but then you saw something out of the corner of your eye. It was blue, but ti went by too quickly for you to make out any details. Then there was a flash and you saw a flicker of something before it vanished.
Now the bushes are cooing at you, and you're pretty sure bushes shouldn't do that.

Updated Map


Before Round 1 can begin, everyone needs to roll that sweet, sweet initiative and say what they're doing [if you're planning on melee, that's probably using the entire round to get up to the cart].

Secret Initiatives:

Bandits: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (14) + 5 = 19

Kressle: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (16) + 1 = 17

And just for you guys, a map!
A Map.


After an eighteen hour hike, during which Dariya proved to be an even louder companion than you feared, you make it to the radish patch, and collect a satchel of the spicy roots. Unfortunately, it is nightfall; so you set up camp, and rest for the night [I doubt Thrae was ever trusted on watch alone].
The next morning you set out back to Oleg's arriving late in the afternoon with the radishes. Svetlana is surprised, but is glad that you brought them back fresh. As promised, she gives you 250 GP to split amongst yourselves.
In addition, you receive 100 XP each for completing the quest, bringing your totals up from 3676 XP and 3450 XP to 3776 XP and 3550 XP respectively!
Gird is just being grumpy or something, yes.

After being politely asked to make camp outside the fort, you rest and set out the next day for actual exploring, moving back through the woods with the radish patch, and west into the woods proper at the begining of the third day of exploring you come across a river, its banks thick with brambles and other sharp foliage. You follow it South for a bit until you find a path alongside a creek that branches into the river proper. There is an abandoned cart about 60 feet from the river bank and up the trail. It looks like there might be the glitter of gold coming from the cart, but it's hard to tell.
What do you do?

Updated Map


I bet you're all itching to explore again, so I'm just gonna skip acting out the breakfast.

Tensions are high when Oleg wakes up to see Garhan, Woden, and Huey gone, and a Gnoll in their place. A Kobold was more than enough for him, without a Gnoll Raider from the Southern River Kingdoms. The dramabomb that followed was hilarious and horrible. You should have been there.
Hospitality is a little more hap-hazard this time, even with your explanation. The meal is not quite as hearty as it might have been [though Gird and Oomlowt don't notice, a week or so on the road will do that to you], and Thrae is just avoided as soon as she is given her meal [which is the same as everyone else].

After that Oleg meets with Oomlowt and Gird to discuss the current situation in more detail. You fill him in on the specifics of your fallen comrades end, and although he thinks it's a little silly that they died for a tribe of Kobolds, he believes it was a wise decision. Better to have a tribe of evil [he makes sure to add generally to that description] humanoids allied with you than actively working against you, especially since your description of their home sounds like a silver mine. He'll be sure to send word to the Swordlords so you can get that reward of 800 GP.
He also tells you that he has received word that the last charter has reached its destination in the Hooktongue Slough, a swamp to the West of the Greenbelt. He then tells you to keep an eye on the Gnoll. Even is she may not worship Demons, or whatever the hells it is those monsters pay tribute to, she should not be trusted. Especially with all the stories Oleg has heard about worshipers of Hanspur. He pointedly warns you to stay away from the Sellen River when she's around.
When asked to identify your red crossbow bolts, he can't give you much. He thinks they might be magic, but dammit Oomlowt, he's a shopkeeper, not a wizard.
As you rummage through your lootsack, he asks if you've found a pearl wedding ring, and when you say it rings a bell and pull it out from the Kobold's reward, he is visibly overjoyed, rushing into his home, presumably to give it back to Svetlana.
Then they both come back out, and Svetlana is holding a boar-skin cloak, complete with a tusked-hood. The two thank you both profusely, and tell you that you both officially have 1,000 GP store credit with them.
You chat amiably about things for a while afterward, and once Oleg leaves to clean, Svetlana leans in and gives you a quest!

Moon Radish Soup:

Source: Svetlana Leveton at Oleg’s Trading Post

Task: Oleg’s been under a lot of stress lately, and
Svetlana would love to cook him his favorite meal
(moon radish soup) to help him relax. Unfortunately,
moon radishes are relatively rare. A patch grows
about 16 miles south of the trading post.

Completion: Bring Svetlana a basket of moon
radishes.

Reward: Svetlana is ready to pay a 250 gp reward
to anyone who can bring her enough moon radishes to
make soup.

Quest Counter:
- Tatzlwyrm Head for Oleg
- Bandits in the Hills for the Swordlords
- Gird was asked to find that one temple for Jhod
- Magic Juice for Bokken
- Moon Radish Soup for Svetlana

Additionally, there is a new wanted poster:

Wanted: Tuskgutter:

Source: Wanted poster at Oleg’s Trading Post

Task: Every Greenbelt hunter has a story about
Tuskgutter, each wilder than the last. Whoever
manages to kill the ill-tempered beast will get a
nice reward from old, retired Vekkel Benzen, who
lost his leg to the monster pig a year ago.

Completion: Deliver Tuskgutter’s head to Oleg’s.

Reward: Vekkel has promised his masterwork longbow
and six +1 animal bane arrows to whoever can kill
Tuskgutter. He also promises to share the head
cheese he plans to make out of this trophy.

Finally, it's time for some XP rewards, although, only for Gird and Oomlowt since they were the only ones who participated. Total XP Earned for all the quests completed, as well as allying with Sootscale and killing Tartuk are: 3,200 [600+600+1,200+400+400] which divided amongst you two brings your total XP up from 2076 to 3676 XP!

Everyone else will have a base XP of 3,450 XP because I said so.

It's time to get exploring again! Which Hex do you want to go to next?
Map


Moving right along, since Gird could not be here, I'm just going to stealthily push you guys along so we can at least get a first look at the other dudes, even if we won't really get to introduce them. :'(

After Thrae gets her heal on [she's saying she's healing you] and joins your group, you fill her in on the plan to return to Oleg's to resupply and what-not. If you're lucky, you hope to hire a Mercenary or something to help you out on your quest.
And so, after 3 nights, you reach the trading post just as dawn creeps over the horizon. The guards you saw last time draw their weapons at first, but once you explain that the Gnoll is with you, and even happens to be a holywoman they reluctantly put down their weapons. They still eye her suspiciously when everyone shuffles into the trading post.

Oleg isn't awake yet, but it looks like the guesthouse is occupied, judging by the giant dog [it has to be larger than Woofles!] curled up by the door.

Okay, tell us a little bit about yourselves new recruits!
Also, I rushed that something terrible.


GMNPCing Oomlowt for now.

After a long vigil, you both retire to the caverns for some rest, Sootscale allowing Gird to use the horse-skin hanging up in Tartuk's old chambers as bedding much more comfortable than the cave floor It is a good days rest, and both of you heal 2 HP! It was good.

The following night you set out again, after Gird has collected the ashes of your comrades for an old ritual of her village. She still won't say where she grew up or anything.
And so the two of you make the four hour journey at the start of the night to Shrike River to the South, where Gird says some final rites before throwing the ashes into the river.
Cadaverpede is still there, and much happier now that it doesn't have a bunch of crap on its back.

And that is when you both notice the cloaked figure loping down the bank towards you, eyes gleaming in the dark.

Come on! Come on! It's time for the box of band-aids!


Unfortunately, graduation shenanigans have been consuming my time, so for another week or so I won't be able to contribute much.
So, I dunno, you guys can RP more mourning or whatever you want?


As everyone backs away from the corpses, Sootscale steps forward again, and starting with Nakpik, moves down the line, saying a few words of farewell before setting the pyre on fire.

Then, he turns to you and says, "Go rest whenever you are ready, take your time. We will be here with you."
The vigil has begun.


"What a f***ing weird piece of sh**."

Just then, a Kobold walks up and says, "The funeral is starting outside the the home, follow me."

You follow her out and you can see five stacks of sticks and grass, three larger than the other two, and on each a body lies. All of the Kobolds are gathered around the bodies, in a circle. Sootscale holds a torch, and gestures to you to come join him.
He then shouts in Taldane, so that all present could understand, "These are the heroes who saved us from the false-shaman Tartuk, and his useless war against the mites! These three tallfolk, and our own Nakpick and Outlien laid down their lives so that we could be free from the purple-scale's tyranny. Pay your last respects now, before the Lady of Graves claims them for their fate."
He then steps back, as the entire tribe steps forward, or at least the entire tribe that was present (it seems as if a hunting party had just arrived). They mill about the Kobolds whispering a cloud of goodbyes in Draconic, before moving onto the Garhan, Woden, and Huey. They thanked them for their ultimate sacrifice, so that they may be free. A few even put a few coins and other trinkets on the pyre.

Gird steps forward and moves down the line, giving each corpse a quick, final rite in the style of the church of Erastil. She does this quietly, and stares daggers at Oomlowt in case he tried to say something about it.
She's trying not to cry, in her own, callous way.

What do you do?


Gird manages to find a small puddle to wash her face and clean her armor with, taking it in bowls as instructed by a passing Kobold (tainting their water supply would be not cool, after all). After she feels like she and her armor are clean enough, given her resources, she goes to sit next to Oomlowt while he's reading. It feels really good to sit down.

"Never trust a fool," she says sarcastically as she sits down, "Nice get-up Oomlowt. What's the journal say so far?"


Sootscale nods, and gestures to his tribe, leaving you two alone, issuing commands to prepare funeral pyres this time in Draconic, and collect the bodies of the dead.

Gird scrunches up her face, "Well, it looked like a journal to me, but can you read it? Maybe there's a treasure map or something in there, and since it looks like we're going to be staying a while, and since it looks like we're going to stick around for a bit, you can get started."
Gird's just a little mad that she didn't get to pick something out of the pile, even if special-looking crossbow bolts would be the smartest choice for the good of the party.
It's still a little annoying.

Gird lets out a sigh, "So, want to get ready for the funeral?" She wants to find some water to wipe the muck off of her face, and maybe wipe the blood off of her everything else.


Forgot that I was GMNPCing Gird this time, whoops!

Gird's excited to loot something, even if she'll have to give away money eventually, so while Oomlowt scurries to the pile in the dark, she descends onto Tartuk's bleeding corpse and rifles through his pockets. The sickle is too small for her, but she wonders if Oomlowt might like it? He always defaults to that crossbow, it would be healthy for him to get into a real fight for once.
If not, he could always sell it.
"Hey, Oomlowt, you want this sickle?" She asks even as she descends on Tartuk's wand. It was a powerhouse in that fight, and Wandy's is having some problems, so just in case.
She grabs the book from Tartuk's belt as well, wondering if it's a spellbook or something Goatbo-Garhan never had a spellbook, so why would Tartuk? but as she opens it, she can see that it is a probably some sort of journal, although the lines are gibberish.
"Hey, Oomlowt, you know languages, can you read this?" She then throws the journal at Oomlowt without waiting for a response.

She's about to leave the corpse, when she brushes her hands on Tartuk's flimsy-looking clothe bracers, only to find them feel hard, like steel under her touch.
Definitely going to grab those, even if they're too small for her.

Meanwhile Sootscale nods, "Thank you for all your help Oomlowt Heroscale, you will always be welcome here." He then makes a Kobold-smile, "You must be tired, would you like to rest here today? We can give you and your tall folk fresh bedding, and we can include your other tall folk in the funeral rights for Nakpik and Outlien." He gets a little distant as he says this.

What do you do?


Sootscale breathes heavily for a moment, savoring the last moments of adrenaline. Then he brings himself up to his tallestseveral inches taller than Oomlowt and proclaims, "You can have the usurper's belongings, and in that alcove behind you, you may take one of the items from the pile, as well as the mite's treasure." He then adds in a softer voice, "It's the most we can do."

A quick pat down of Tartuk's corpse gives you his sickle, with the beautiful skull design and sturdy, iron blade. There is also his wand, and a set of bracers, which feel a lot sturdier when held than they looked like on his body. And hooked to his belt besides a pouch full of miscellaneous nicknacks and detritus, there is a simple, leather-bound book, and when opened, shows that it is a journal, judging by the dates on the pages. It appears to be written in Undercommon, although if Gird finds it, she wouldn't know that.

When you move into the small alcove, you can see a disorganized pile of junk. Most of it is shiny rocks, of different colors, although there are some broken weapons and armor, all worthless now. There are also several piles of coins, mostly copper and silver pieces, although there are some gold pieces as well. Resting near the front is a light metal shield, and scattered across the top are six red-orange crossbow bolts. Finally, some dirty, if beautiful, boots rest next to a soiled leather bag, presumably the bandit's loot.

The bag is heavy with money, but if you dig you can also find a small pouch at the bottom, filled with chalk, as well as a simple brass wedding ring set with a pearl.

What do you do?


ROUND 8

Secret Rolls:

Chief Sootscale Attack: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (4) + 4 = 8
Chief Sootscale Damage: 1d4 ⇒ 2

Tartuk Attack: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (4) + 4 = 8
Tartuk Damage: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5

27 Chief Sootscale: Sootscale raises his club in hopes of taking out Tartuk from behind Oomlowt, but the angle is not right, and the club is easily blocked by the shaman's shield.

25 Tartuk: Tartuk starts to mumble kill me in several languages, still with the same serene look. He lazily swings his sickle at Oomlowt, but misses by a long shot. His bird is wheeling over his head screeching kill me in Draconic.

23 Oomlowt: You decide it would be best to give the shaman what he desires, and fire another bolt, which is also deflected by the shaman's shield.
It is ebginning to damage your calm.

15 Gird: Not caring about the Kobolds, you shove your way past, and reading your sword, push through Sootscale and Oomlowt, to some sounds of protest, and drive your sword up and into Tartuk's chest, blood leaking out of the shaman's grievous wound. He looks at you just ebfore he dies, and whispers something in that same strange language. And then he simply hangs limp from your sword.

COMBAT OVER, REJOICE!


ROUND 7

Secret Rolls:

O'thyme Attack: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5
O'thyme Damage: 1d6 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0

27 Chief Sootscale: Sootscale moves up behind Oomlowt, club out. "Oomlowt, I'm sorry for my weakness. I did not expect Old Sharptooth to be so real. I am back now, and ready to end sneaky Tartuk's villainy for good."

25 Tartuk: Tartuk looks slowly down at his bleeding chest, and a look of utter peace starts to crawl across his face. He coughs again, and clambers over his pot, dropping his wand next to it in the process. He lazily stumbles towards Oomlowt, a serenely stupid look on his face. He unhooks his sickle from his belt, and stops in front of Oomlowt. He raises his sickle half-heartedly and whispers in Draconic, "kill me."
He gurgles a bit before adding in Taldane, a little louder, "Kill me!"
Finally he forces his face into yours and screams something in a language unfamiliar to you, it sounds eclectic and slightly lyrical. Blood flecks all over your snout in the process. It's pretty gross.

23 Oomlowt: This shaman is cray cray. You level your crossbow squarely at his eyes, and let a bolt fly, which ricochets off of his shield and into the tunnel behind you.
You've no sympathy at all.

15 Gird: You start to run away more, but as you move further, you are overcome with feelings of guilt. Sootscale called you a coward, and a dog. And that is just how you have been behaving.
You let yourself be intimidated by a short, scaly, weakling. So what if he can sling some spells, you have a giant sword, and you're fairly certain that his magic would help him too much against it.
So you turn back, just as you start to hear the screams.

14 Nakpik & Mikmek: Mikmek starts to regain his confidence, especially at Tartuk's recent explosion. He might also be getting braver because he's pretty sure he won't have to do anything this battle.
He's pretty battled out.

14 Kobolds: The Kobolds begin to move around Oomlowt and Sootscale, taking up combat positions. One even manages to get into a spot where he can attack Tartuk, but his spear bounces off the shaman's magic shield.

Updated Map


ROUND 6

Secret Rolls:

Magic Missile 1: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3
Magic Missile 2: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2

27 Chief Sootscale: Sootscale keeps on running, and makes it into his tribe, and seeing them starting to level weapons at Gird screams, "The sneaky usurper is in there! Leave the tall, angry one alone. She is just a cowardly dog!" Come Sootscales, we must kill the shaman for his crimes against us!
Sootscale is officially Gird's knight in shining armor, you're welcome.

25 Tartuk: Tartuk can hear Sootscale returning, and his smile broadens, and he closes his eyes briefly almost looking at peace, before raising his wand again and sending another rattling volley of magic bolts at Oomlowt, dealing 4 points of damage!
"It will end soon, finally it will end." He whispers to nobody in particular. He then gives a giggling smile, and gives Oomlowt quite the evil eye.

23 Oomlowt: You call for Gird to get away, the Kobolds may have been set back on course, but you don't know if they will continue once the shaman is dead. You reload your crossbow and send another bolt sailing at Tartuk, this one lodging firmly in the Shaman's chest. The other kobold starts to cough a bit, blood gurgling from his mouth. He looks you in the eye, and you can tell he doesn't have much left.

15 Gird: You angrily denounce the Kobolds, having no idea they can, in fact, speak and understand Taldane, before continuing to backpedal. You hope Oomlowt's gonna make it out okay, even going so far as to pray to Erastil.

14 Nakpik & Mikmek: Mikmek is getting shakily to his feet now that Sootscale is back. He even pulls out Oomlowt's dagger, trying desperately to look brave.

14 Kobolds: The Kobolds who had started to move after Gird stop, and instead begin to move towards Tartuk again.
They're going to end this once and for all.

beautifully crafted descriptions are for pansies.

Updated Map


ROUND

Secret Rolls:

Tartuk Bluff Check: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (16) + 12 = 28

Kobolds Sense Motive Check: 1d20 ⇒ 15

27 Chief Sootscale: Sootscale is charging back. He doesn't want Tartuk to win at any cost, after all.

25 Tartuk: Tartuk raises his rattle for a fourth time, but before doing anything, a terrible, sneaky smile creeps across his face. He lowers his wand, and shouts:
"Sootscales, you hear that Half-Orc? She's trying to sell you to me. Would a hero do that? What would you expect from tall folk? Kill her. Kill her to show you are true kobolds, worthy of the blessings of Old Sharptooth!"
He snickers, so softly it is barely audible. His smirk, however, is more than loud enough.

23 Oomlowt: You leap into the hall, not caring about Gird's fire. The shaman is trying to turn the Kobold's against you, and you won't have any of it! You send another crossbow bolt sailing in the strangely-scaled Kobold's direction, but it is unfortunately too high.

15 Gird: You continue to back away, and not caring that Oomlowt is in the way, use your wand again.
Except nothing happens.
This won't be going so well.

14 Nakpik & Mikmek: Mikmek is a blubbering mess, don't pay any attention to him.

14 Kobolds: The Kobolds all have odd looks on their faces, before they start to turn towards Gird, readying their weapons.

Haha, what a lazy effort on this round. I'm such a champ.

Updated Map


ROUND 4

Secret Rolls:

Outlien Attack: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (9) + 1 = 10
Outlien Damage: 1d6 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2

Tartuk Concentration: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (8) + 9 = 17
Magic Missile 1: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5
Magic Missile 2: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3
Tartuk sense Motive Check: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (16) + 1 = 17
Acid Splash Ranged Touch: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (15) + 3 = 18
Acid Splash Damage: 1d3 ⇒ 3

27 Chief Sootscale: Sootscale continues to rush through the tunnels trying to get as far away from Tartuk and Old Sharptooth as possible. He makes it to the pit traps near the entrance before the cloud of fear in his mind has cleared. "That tricky shaman usurper, I won't fall for your sneaky tricks again!" he shouts to no one in particular before turning around to start the run back to his revenge.

25 Tartuk: Tartuk smiles and brings his hands up and moves them about as if he had a marionette on a set of strings attached to his fingers. His eyes glow a sick, green color as a chlorine-colored mist spills out of his fingers and into a small ball dangling from his bent hand. Then he suddenly flips his hand over so his palm is facing up, and chucks the sick-colored orb at Gird, which explodes on her face, sizzling into her skin and dealing 3 points of damage! He shakes his wand right after, and two more missiles burst forth, the first one hitting Gird in the chest, leaving a feeling of uncomfortable pain and dealing 5 points of damage! The second one turns towards Outlien, almost as if it was an afterthought, striking him in the face, and sending him tumbling backwards.
Tartuk is very, very happy.

23 Oomlowt: It was all a trick. How dare he make you relive that, and with such horrible embellishments! You're gonna kill that purple freak! You're going to kill him deader than dead.

15 Gird: Ow, that hurt. A lot. This isn't going too well. Why not try to reason with it and save your own skin? Not very Paladin-like of you, but these are all Kobolds, you're pretty sure all of them are evil anyway. So you you play for time, trying to bluff out Tartuk as you take a five-foot step back, and unleash your wand's burning fury at the shaman. You're ready to be done with these scaly runts.

14 Nakpik & Mikmek: Mikmek is not being particularly helpful this combat, is he. If Kobolds could cry, he would probably be bawling in fear.

14 Kobolds: The Kobolds are whispering and looking at Gird. They don't look super stoked. Especially not the one that was closest to the fire.

Updated Map


ROUND 3

Secret Rolls:

Outlien Attack: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 1 = 7
Outlien Damage: 1d6 - 1 ⇒ (6) - 1 = 5

Chief Sootscale Attack: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (12) + 4 = 16
Chief Sootscale Damage: 1d4 ⇒ 4

Tartuk Concentration: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (19) + 9 = 28

Magic Missile 1: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3
Magic Missile 2: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5

Cause Fear Rounds: 1d4 ⇒ 1

27 Chief Sootscale: Sootscale just keeps on running and screaming. It's gonna be particularly embarrassing to him later, in a deep, personal way.

25 Tartuk: Tartuk sneers, and starts a repeat performance of the spell he cast on Sootscale, only this time, he holds a wand in his left hand, which seems to slightly hamper his motions. Not enough, unfortunately, and as her directs the spell towards, Oomlowt, the Wand also activates, sending a bolt towards you and Outlien.

23 Oomlowt: At the spectral demon (lord?) advances and passes into you, your mind is filled with visions of an angry tribe, your friends and family furious with you for breaking taboo, you had started to try and have a Saturday morning special moment with Tartuk, but as you form the words "scales outside," you can't help but give a started cry of anguish. Outlien has turned towards you. He is one of your old tribemates. The walls have changed. They're swarming with ticks. Tartuk is the old priest, smiling cruelly and saying, "You you have no idea what my scales are like." You turn and run, clinging your crossbow to your chest. You stumble in front of Gird how has turned into a giant, green kobold, staring disapprovingly down at you. You almost plea for her help, but ehr face twists into that of a mite, it's eyes suddenly opening wide, with black ichor exploding from one of its eyes as an invisible knife sinks into it.
You push past her, not sure what she says to you as you scramble past your old tribemates, all of them gazing hardly at you. Up ahead in the gloom you can see another Kobold running away. It looks like you.

15 Gird: What happened to Oomlowt? He just completely lost it. That shaman's magic is making you really uneasy now. You fire another arrow, aiming for the bird this time, hoping to take the shaman out of commission. The projectile sinks into the bird's breast, causing it to falter in the air before regaining control, then both it and Tartuk turn towards you and laugh. The shaman then stares you straight in the face and speaks in an accented Taldane no Kobold could produce, "Are you sure you want to do that, orc?" He laughs again.

14 Nakpik & Mikmek: Mikmek is really super terrified now, because Oomlowt has now rushed past his having some sort of mental breakdown.

14 Kobolds: Outlien is terrible with his spear, and probably also generally terrified. And now a magic sphere of light has just exploded in his gut, and it really hurts. It is really very disorienting.
The other Kobolds mill about behind Gird uncertainly. Was this such a good idea, after all?

Updated Map


ROUND

Secret Rolls:

Outlien Attack: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (10) + 1 = 11
Outlien Damage: 1d6 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2

Nakpik Attack: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (18) + 1 = 19
Nakpik Damage: 1d6 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2

Magic Missile 1: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3
Magic Missile 2: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5

27 Chief Sootscale: Sootscale started trembling earlier, but now he can't control it anymore, and lets out a choked cry of terror before turning around and pushing past Oomlowt and Gird, running through his subjects, letting out terrified wails of, "Old Sharptooth is angry!" and "I was wrong, so very wrong he is coming for me!"

25 Tartuk: tartuk reaches for his belt, and pulls out a thin rod, with a blue tip. It somewhat resembles a maraca, although you have no idea what a maraca is. He then brings it up, and then down, producing a sound somewhat like falling water. The end of the rod explodes with a bright, white light which sends two bullets of energy spiraling from it and straight through Nakpik. who coughs up a bit of blood and crumples over, laying still. Tartuk smiles in a smug, self-satisfied way.

23 Oomlowt: With the explosion of light, you get a nice, clear look at Tartuk's scale color, and they're... purple? A Kobold with purple scales? How does that happen? Kobolds shouldn't have purple scales. Ever.
Maybe if he's dead you'll find out why he has purple scales, and you send a crossbow bolt flying into his shoulder. Which causes him to grunt with pain and look directly at you, he does not look happy at all.

15 Gird: The bird continues to screech, and you wonder if it could be important to the shaman. You then ask Oomlowt if Garhan's goat did anything, because you were pretty sure it did. You also briefly wonder what happened to it while you traveled here, it just sort of seemed to vanish.
You let loose another arrow while you're wondering this, and you anticipate it exploding through the shaman's head, but it merely bounces off an invisible wall. directly in front of the kobold, who give a slight smirk.

14 Nakpik & Mikmek: Mikmek is even more afraid now that Sootscale has run past him, and Nakpik is dead.

14 Kobolds: Outlien swipes at Tartuk again, but he still cannot manage to hit the Shaman, who begins to lower the wand in his direction...

Updated Map


ROUND 1

Secret Rolls:

Kobolds' Initiative: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (13) + 1 = 14
Outlien Attack: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (10) + 1 = 11
Outlien Damage: 1d6 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0

Nakpik & Mikmek Initiative: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (13) + 1 = 14
Nakpik Attack: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (19) + 1 = 20
Nakpik Damage: 1d6 - 1 ⇒ (6) - 1 = 5

Chief Sootscale Initiative: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (20) + 7 = 27
Chief Sootscale Attack: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (14) + 4 = 18
Chief Sootscale Damage: 1d4 ⇒ 2

Tartuk Initiative: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (20) + 5 = 25
Tartuk Concentration: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (15) + 9 = 24
Sootscale Will Save: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (11) + 1 = 12
Cause Fear Rounds: 1d4 ⇒ 3

Kobolds Tiebreaker: 1d20 ⇒ 15

Nakpik & Mikmek Tiebreaker: 1d20 ⇒ 18

27 Chief Sootscale: Chief Sootscale roars in some odd mixture of rage and delight, and swings his club across the top of the cauldron, sending it sailing across Tartuk's snout. Blood begins well up from one of the shaman's nostrils, and a shadow of cruel glee passes over his face.

25 Tartuk: Tartuk brings up his hands from behind the cauldron, and begins to make a series of complex motions, as a string of arcane words bubbles up and out of his mouth. His eyes roll back, before glowing with a ghostly light, and his face takes on a skull-like quality as he gestures towards Sootscale, a spectral, winged Kobold bursting from Tartuk's hands and into Sootscale's smiling face, which begins to twist into a look of complete terror.

23 Oomlowt: You fire your crossbow, but unfortunately, your bolt bounces ineffectually off the cauldron's lip. The shade of Tartuk's scales is bugging you, though, You can't quite tell in the hallway, but it looks like they are much lighter than the rest of the Sootscales'. What is up with this shaman?

15 Gird: You pull out your longbow, but the caves, closer quarters, though nowhere near as bad as the Mite Warren's, make it hard to fire, and you fumble your shot into one of the horse hides.
Well, isn't that just your luck.

14 Nakpik & Mikmek: Nakpik pulls out one of his small spears, and leveling it at Tartuk, jabs it into the shaman's side, causing the strangely-colored Kobold to scream, and direct his gaze in Nakpik's direction.

14 Kobolds: Most of the Kobolds are milling about in the tunnel behind you, but Outlien tries his best to mimic Nakpik's success. Unfortunately, Tartuk twists his body to face Nakpik at the wrong moment, and Outlien misses the shot. Instead, the raven turns its head and begins to screech in Draconic, "Heathens!" over, and over again.

Updated Map


As you rush forward, the kobolds let you pass; you look far better equipped for murder than they are, after all. You move through more of the cavern, and as you go, Mikmek starts to lag behind, until he is simply cowering in a puddle of water, urging you to go on without him.
The tunnel turns, and then opens up into a new, faintly lit room:

"The walls of this cavern are decorated by a rickety wooden frame formed from clean-cut branches lashed together with gut and twine. Banners cut from two-foot-wide strips of old blankets and horsehides hang from floor to ceiling, covering much of the walls. The sloppily painted banners bear dozens of primitive icons and mystic symbols. A large cauldron filled with bubbling red liquid boils in the center of the room."

Stooped over the cauldron is Tartuk himself, his raven jittering on his shoulder as he stares at Sootscale, who is standing in the center of the room, seething.
"Now, Sootscale what do you think you're doing? You know that staging a coup will anger Old Sharptooth. And then what will happen? Then you will waste away under the curse." A smug smile briefly flickers across his snout, but it vanishes as his eyes dart behind Sootscale and directly at both of you. Then his face becomes a thoughtful mask.

Sootscale grins, and unballs a fist, letting a few remnants of the statue fall to ground, "Old Sharptooth no longer holds power here." He gestures to the two kobolds to either side of him, "Outlien, Nakpik, kill the usurper."

Combat! Roll for initiative! Then let me know what you do in the first Round as usual.

Updated Map


Most of the other Kobolds are already rushing out of the common room, but Sootscale hears you, and yells over his shoulder, this time in Taldane, "Tartuk didn't cast curse, it was Old Sharptooth's anger, but we're now! The thrusts his club in the air again before continuing to run.
Mikmek stays behind, though, he's grown rather attached to Oomlowt, "We would only turn yellow and die, anyway."
Then he too starts to move down the tunnel, but rather slower, waiting for Oomlowt and Gird to catch up.

Updated Map


Giant post incoming, hold onto your butts.

Nakpik nods, and rushes behind one of the rocks again, and pulls out a stick and some crude rope, almost certainly intended to repair the cage, then using his meager Kobold strength, he forces the cage open. Cadaverpede as it rushes to mite's corpse and begins to wrap itself around the disgusting, dead creature. While the centipede is distracted, Nakpik carefully loops some of the rope around its body and tethers it to the ground not far from the cage using the stick. He looks at it warily before saying in Draconic, ”That should hold it until we get back.” He doesn't look entirely sure of that statement, but you don't feel like pushing it.

Nakpik then scuttles forward and slings his arm around around Mikmek's shoulder and begins to whisper conspiratorially as they walk into the gloom. It's difficult to hear their exact words, but Nakpik seems to be asking for exact details on Mikmek's capture by the mites and rescue at the hands of Oomlowt. You both follow, and as your eyes adjust to darkness of the cave, you notice Nakpik and Mikmek both have started hugging one side of the wall. Mikmek is in the rear, and turns around saying in Taldane, ”Beware pit traps, do what I do.” He then hugs the wall even tighter for another fifteen feet or so before joining Nakpik on the other side. He then turns and nods his head to you in encouragement.

After you move past the pits, the kobolds continue to lead you, Mikmek still recounting the heroics of his comrades Tabe, Soem, and Amkin. Apparently they fought bravely, but were unable to make much of a dent in the mites' numbers.

The walls of the tunnel you are in begin to close in, and Nakpik and Mikmek go back into single file to fit through a particularly small space. You follow, but Gird, you are forced to squeeze through the gap, and your scale mail makes an uncomfortable scraping sound as you move past the rock. You don't notice it now, as Darkvision turns the world into shades of grey, but later you find a fleck or two of shiny rock on your armor. It probably isn't that important.

The tunnel widens again, and Mikmek is currently retelling Oomlowt's heroics, with a decidedly Kobold spin, but goes quiet as he and Nakpik turn left into another room:

The walls of this cave have been smeared with what appears to be charcoal and blood to depict multiple representations in red and black of a looming, sharp-toothed reptilian devil. Two low stone tables sit in the middle of the room, one of which is stained with blood.

It is obvious Mikmek does not like it here, and Nakpik is trembling something terrible. They both rush past, and into the next room. You follow, but not before noticing another kobold Kobold2 on the map seemingly materialize from one of the walls in the temple, its head tilted to one side in curiosity, but javelin still aimed at your backs. You move into the next room:

The air in this large cave feels warm and close, thick with a reptilian stink mixed with smoke and burnt meat. Numerous beds of furs lie scattered throughout the room amid smoldering cookfires, while to the south, a ten-foot-wide alcove contains a large mound of furs framed by dozens of sticks on which are mounted the skulls of many birds and small animals, all smeared with ash.

Six kobolds make a worried ring around the room, while a very worried, and yet still intimidating for a Kobold male sits atop the mound of furs, his club ready to strike at intruders. He's a real beauty, ain't he?

Sootscale is obviously taken aback, a motley collection of Nakpik, a living Mikmek, a strangely dressed Kobold with bright scales he can't see the colors, and a slouching and very angry-looking half-orc had stumbled into the common room, and while the scraping had made him ready for intruders, he did not expect this.

”Mikmek... you're-you're alive?” His voice is surprisingly deep for a kobold. He is astounded, momentarily lowering his weapon. He quickly raises it again and inquires in Draconic, ”And who is this other kobold and why is he accompanied by a tall folk?”[b]

Mikmek quickly answers, trying to quiet down Sootscale, [b]”This is Oomlowt and his pet Half-Orc, he saved me and rescued the statue-”

Sootscale cuts him off, ”He has the statue?” He turns to face Oomlowt and then commands, still in Draconic, ”Give me the statue.” His eyes are shining with excitement.

But before you can reply, Mikmek cuts in, ”Actually, he let me hold onto it,” he takes the statue and hands it to Sootscale, who hastily grabs it and then stares at it with a fierce look of concentration, as if he was making a particularly difficult decision. Mikmek looks like he's about to say something when Sootscale shrieks with triumph and lifts the statue high over his head before smashing it on the ground at his feet, the ivory depiction of Old Sharptooth fragmenting terribly.

Sootscale then starts emitting a giddy laugh and looks at Oomlowt, a frantic smile on his snout, ”Thank you for freeing us from this curse, now, please, come join us in killing the usurper.” He looks around at the gathered kobolds, all of them gathering up their weapons before thrusting his club in the air and shouting again, ”Kill the usurper!”
What do you do?

Updated Map
Whoops, looks like Cadaverpede wandered on its tether, or at least, that's my story.


GMNPC Gird time is go

Nakpik and Mikmek both begin to move into the darkness of the cave, arms over each others shoulders before abruptly stopping. Nakpik turns and ask you, "Oomlowt, what are we going to do about your, uh, bugsnake over there? We can't really bring it into home, not with all the bodies."
They both look uneasily at Cadaverpede which has skittered over to the mite's cage and seems to be chittering over it sadly.
Gird is leaning on a rock, waiting for this strange, new chapter in her life to be over already.


The mite yelps as the bolt sinks into its forehead. Then is keels over in its cage, blood oozing from its wound lazily. Nakpik is startled by the sudden attack before looking confused and saying, "Take it to the chief... but we should take it to Tart-" But Mikmek cuts him off moving forward and slinging his frail, Kobold arm around his tribemate's shoulder and whispering, "No no no, we take it to the Chief, and we may get rid of nasty Tartuk and his creepy bird, too. Oomlowt there is going to help us do this. He already sacrificed the majority of his heroes to save Old Sharptooth, I think we have a chance against Old Purpleface with him by our side. He is a real Kobold's Kobold."
He looks back and smiles before continuing, "So, let's bring this to the Chief, yes?"


All of you decide to stop and wait for nightfall proper, which everyone a chance to rest after the horrifying events of the mites' lair.
When the shadows have deepened and Darkvision becomes necessary, Mikmek leaps up from his position of watch, and announces, "We go to home." in Taldane before looking around for some landmarks to follow back to his home.

Mikmek Survival Check: 1d20 - 1 + 5 ⇒ (18) - 1 + 5 = 22

And it takes him twenty or so minutes of searching before he finds what he's looking for and begins the trek to south. The centipede diligently follows with the bodies lashed to its back. The mites were good to it. It would do whatever the mites asked it to. They asked it to help nasties. It will help nasties.
Meanwhile, Gird limps along nearby looking a bit like she's going to be sick. Oomlowt moves along nearby, and Mikmek is taking the lead bringing the strange party through the hills, until about midnight he stops and you can see:
"An outcropping of large boulders emerges from the weathered face of a nearby hillock. A narrow opening in the rock leads into darkness below. A fallen sign leans against the side of the cave entrance, and a cage made of branches and sticks sits on the other side."
Inside the stick cage is a single sobbing mite, his eyes bruised from what must be exposure to harsh sunlight and his warty skin streaked with dirt and filth.
As Mikmek gets closer, another Kobold with similarly dark scales peeks his head from behind one of the boulders, chirping in Draconic. "Mikemek! You're back! What happened to the rest of your part?" He then looks at Oomlowt, Gird, and Cadaverpede and continues, "And what is with the firescale, the brute, and the bug?"
Mikmek puffs out his chest and answers, "This is Oomlowt and his brave party of heroes! They helped me retrieve the statue for us!" He thrusts the ivory statue of Old Sharptooth forward.
What do you do?

Updated Greenbelt Map
Sootscale Caverns Map


Mikmek jumps, he had been busying himself with looking at the ground like a champ.
"Oh, um, take my warriors, uh, ... half night of travel to get to tree?" He doesn't sound particularly sure of himself. His Taldane is not refined at all.
He then blinks a couple of time before whispering to Oomlowt in Draconic, "Is it just me or objects getting more distinct... the night is falling, yes?" He begins to look around a bit more before tentatively continuing in Taldane, "If wait awhile, I can lead to home?"
In case it wasn't obvious, Mikmek is basing his travel time on moving straight through the hex as opposed to thoroughly exploring it, so travel time might be different depending on what you guys want to do.
And I can talk to you about that Centipede later.


Mikmek is absolutely terrified of Gird, and shuts up as soon as she starts yelling.
He then promptly slinks away behind Oomlowt, clutching the statue to his chest protectively.


Gird lost one hit point the first time, and remained unconscious, but the second time she woke up, and can slowly come to terms with her current position, aka lashed to the back of a straining, six-foot-centipede along with the corpses of Garhan, Woden, and Huey. They haven't started to smell yet, but it should definitely be pretty unnerving. Gird is also now disabled, so she can be of a little more use, although not too much, as she'll risk further injury and go back to dying.

Mikmek looks a lot less glum, "Yes, let's cut him down to size. Yes..." He looks back down at the statue before screeching "Death to Tartuk!" Over and over again while bouncing around the strange traveling company, obviously ecstatic about this new turn of events.
He must really not like this Tartuk character.
Also, I'd figure Oomlowt and Mikmek have been defaulting to Draconic, something Gird is not particularly well-versed in.


No, that 1d4 was for how many times you get to attempt a DC 10 Constitution check! There I go again not being clear enough, sorry.

Mikmek looks slightly bashful, and averts his gaze mumbling out a very unconvincing, "Yeah, something like that..."
He then looks down at the statue he has been protectively turning about in his hands, his face scrunched up in concentration, before finally sighing and looking back at you.
"I can't lie to you, not after everything you've done for me." He pauses and takes in a rattling breath, this has obviously been something bottled up for a long time, "Tartuk is the shaman of the tribe, and he's the one who brought us Old Sharptooth and his brutal sacrifices, but nobody likes Tartuk very much. Everyone's scared of him, even the chief, but we don't want to be cursed and die yellow, so we do as he says..."
He let's this sink in before looking at you and tentatively going on.
"...Maybe... we can... give the statue back to the chief instead of Tartuk?"
He then bashfully looks away, as if the very idea was dangerous to think about.


Huey Stabilization Roll 1: 1d20 + 2 - 13 ⇒ (8) + 2 - 13 = -3
Huey Stabilization Roll 2: 1d20 + 2 - 14 ⇒ (6) + 2 - 14 = -6
Huey is no more. :(

Updated Map

Over the next hour or so, the mites furtively do as you command. They sullenly give up one of their centipedes, giving it the command to transport the dead and critically wounded of your party. You don't know the first thing about taking care of centipedes, though, so you have no clue how long it will last.
The mites also give up the statue. They don't want to anger the scary sword lords, whoever they are, and wish to be rid of the nasty, little thing.
The statue itself is made of ivory, and depicts a couching Horned Devil, although it is unlikely you know that. When you receive it, Mikmek is overjoyed and cheers, "Death to Tartuk! before hastily covering his snout with his hands. You can play out the rest of this scene if you want by simply starting a post/section of a post with "Mikmek's Slip" in ooc text.

In any case, the mites let you leave along with the straining centipede bearing the bodies of Woden, Garhan, and Huey, as well as the unconscious form of Gird. Mikmek follows alongside, anxious to continue helping in any way he can. The goat that was formerly Calanthe also follows, out of some half-remembered loyalty.
Gird can make 1d4 ⇒ 2 DC 10 Constitution checks to keep from losing more hp, as well as begin recovery.

Furthermore, Oomlowt and Gird both receive 750 experience points for killing the mites and bugs! Furthermore, for "defeating" the other mites, they gain 600 XP each. This brings each of their total XP up from 726 XP to 2076 XP! WELCOME TO SECOND LEVEL GIRD AND OOMLOWT!

Woden, Garhan, Huey, you will be missed.


ROUND 20

Secret Rolls:

Tickleback Damage Roll: 1d6 + 6 ⇒ (5) + 6 = 11 plus grab and disease

Mite10 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (9) + 2 = 11
Mite10 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0

Mite8 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5
Mite8 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

Mite7 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14
Mite7 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2

Mite13 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (19) + 2 = 21
Mite13 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

Mite14 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 = 4
Mite14 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

Mite15 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14
Mite15 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0

Huey Stabilize Roll: 1d20 + 2 - 12 ⇒ (18) + 2 - 12 = 8

Mikmek Attack roll: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (9) + 1 = 10
Mikmek Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

20 Tickleback: Tickleback sinks his fangs into Garhan and drinks deep, much deeper than he did from Woden. There's a delicious tang in the tiefling's blood it has never tasted before, and so continues to grapple his corpse the rest of the round.

11 Mites: The mites continue to send volleys of darts at tickleback, although their greatest hopes of him slaying their enemies seem closer and closer to being realized. But they're still terrified of what that kobold with the crossbow can do.

9 Garhan: noooooooooooo why, he didn't deserve this, he was so bubbly!
Meanwhile, there's a burst of terrible, infernal energy from Calanthe, as her otherworldy powers are revoked, it's unsettling to see from anyone who sees it, and if anyone looked closely enough, it is possible to see the shadow of a fiendish shape rise up before plunging into the ground.
Calanthe is now just a goat. :(

8 Mikmek: Mikmek stabs at Tickleback again. He is furious for reasons he can't explain,and he is going to make the tick PAY.
He even screams, "For Sootscales, for Rescuers, for OLD SHARPTOOTH!"
Unfortunately, he isn't able to make much of a mark in the tick this time, sort of uselessly striking him with his knife.

7 Woden: whyyyyyyyyy

6 Gird: You're still alive thank Erastil.

5 Oomlowt: You calm yourself, and breathing out aim the crossbow at the tick still sucking on Garhan, fire a bolt, which goes through the wound opened by Mikmek and through the other side. Tickleback shudders and collapses to the ground.
Victory.
Sweet, sweet victory.

4 Huey: Huey meanwhile spirals ever closer to death, and will probably be dead by the time anyone can try to stabilize him. :(

Updated Map

VICTORY! COMBAT OVER! Now diplomacy with the mites can happen!
Oomlowt, post your initial rection as well as whatever you think you'll need to post, and then I'll sum up the leaving of the mites for good, and good riddance.


ROUND 19

Secret Rolls:

Mite10 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (15) + 2 = 17
Mite10 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

Mite8 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (10) + 2 = 12
Mite8 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2

Mite7 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (16) + 2 = 18
Mite7 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0

Mite13 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 2 = 22
Mite13 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

Mite14 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 2 = 20
Mite14 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

Mite15 Attack Roll: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14
Mite15 Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0

Tickleback Attack Roll: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (18) + 7 = 25
Tickleback Damage Roll: 1d6 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 = 9 plus grab and disease

Huey Stabilize Roll: 1d20 + 2 - 11 ⇒ (17) + 2 - 11 = 8

Mikmek Attack Roll: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (20) - 1 = 19
Mimek Damage Roll: 1d3 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0
Crit Confirm: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (13) + 1 = 14 stealthily adds one so that it confirms, I'm so sneaky.

Tickleback Grapple because I don't want to mess with Mikmek's awesomeness: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (15) + 7 = 22
dernit

20 Tickleback: Tickleback move around to attack the next biggest target, and pounces on Garhan, dealing 9 points of damage as well as pinning the Tiefling beneath it for some blood draining.
come on Garhan, you can live through this we believe in you.

11 Mites: The mites all nod furiously and bring up their dart guns, firing at Tickleback. They could try to use their Vermin empathy, but they're holding out on the hope that it will kill the intruders.
And they're too scared of Oomlowt to openly disobey his orders.
It's obvious that of the darts that sink into the tick, several cause it to flinch in pain.

9 Garhan: Garhan is unconscious and trapped under the mandibles of a very angry tunnel tick.
Next round make two stabilization checks, one for this round and one for next round, if that makes sense.

8 Mikmek: Mikmek charges forward, and leaps at Tickleback, sinking his knife straight into one of its many eyes, causing the giant vermin to make a screeching noise of pain. Mikmek smiles cruelly, he is going to make all of these mites pay, one way or another.

7 Woden: Gosh, this is so sad.

6 Gird: Erastil is a cruel master, ain't he?

5 Oomlowt: You fire again, but again you miss.
The adrenaline rush of this all must be making your hands shake too much or something.

4 Huey: Huey stop dying, we don't want to you to die!

Rushing these so much, just want to get this done so that the survivors can survive.

Updated Map