Ageless Master

Cai Fen's page

9 posts. Alias of iosokine.


Going to give a perform check now and make up a story based off how well I do.

Perform (untrained): 1d20 + 0 ⇒ (1) + 0 = 1

Oh good. Time to get creative.

Exhausted and covered in mud, Cai Fen visibly perks up at the mention of rest and food (especially if said food is not being prepared by Cooky).

You will be hearing no disagreement from me, Bushy Bearded Bargith Bort!

But tell me, how did this plague start and spread so rapidly? Was there truly no help for the afflicted? Is this common in your unci... in Avistan?

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Oho! A fellow reader?

Cai Fen carefully places a bookmark between two pages lined with small Tien characters, which seem to run vertically down the page.

This novel has much greatness! I have read it many times, as you can see. “The Grand Adventures of Punch Master Shin,” volume 25 of 80. Unfortunately, bringing the whole collection was prohibitive, but this volume is my favorite by far.

In this story, Punch Master Shin confronts the dreaded necromancer Si Ling, who kidnaps his twin sister, who, in the last volume was revealed to be an aspect of the goddess Shizuru, to steal her power……
…to rescue her Shin must gather his friends, including the Drunken Master Bo……
…end up imprisoned and have to break out but…
...all part of Si Ling’s evil master plan……
…Shin fights the beautiful assassin sent by Si Ling but is betrayed…
...Bo lays down his life so that the companions can continue…
…travel to the mysterious temple to acquire the scroll of the ultimate fighting technique (which is different than the ultimate fighting technique Shin discovered in the last volume)….
….again all part of Si Ling’s evil master plan…
…but Kick Expert Huaweng, Shin’s childhood friend and rival is tempted by the darkness, so they fight…
…but then, the Vile Five attack!...
…searching out Si Ling’s phylactery, the group manage to destroy it, but that was all part of Si Ling’s evil master plan…
…Shin and Huaweng team up and use Jagged Tornado Strike to defeat the final member of the Vile Five….
…trapped in an extradimensional space, Shin escapes by punching it really hard…
…Shin is defeated by Si Ling, for the fourth time, but Shin’s sister sacrifices her life so he can read the scroll containing the ultimate fighting technique and use the One True Punch to defeat Si Ling and destroy him forever (although he returns as a minor villain in volume 57)…
…but then she is reincarnated because…

And they all learned valuable life lessons.

Anyway, what kinds of books do you like?

As Cai Fen explores the camp, he softly sings a song from his homeland.

<Kekao zhi he kekao caifu
Kekao zhilang zai Kekao de Wu>

Reliable prices and reliable fortune,
Reliable quality at Reliable Wu's.
Best prices in Tien Xia guaranteed or your money back*
*Customer must present receipts personally countersigned by the Dragon Empress herself. In triplicate.

Cai Fen produces a handkerchief from his pack and loudly blows his nose into it.

Sulfur Smelling <Yao Jing>* has correctness. A proper hierarchy helps the camp run smoothly and ensures that every individual knows what is to be done in an emergency.

Once the discussion in the tavern has concluded, he will proceed toward the door.

As your new Guard Captain, I go to survey the caravan to make certain of the defensible-ness.

Yao Jing:
Tien for hobgoblin. Literally translated as "somehow even uglier goblin."

True to his word, Cai Fen will use his warfare lore to identify tactical vulnerabilities when we travel and make camp.

Warfare Lore: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (11) + 4 = 15

On a critical failure he will pester Tamli and the rest of the party with inane suggestions.

For hero points (assuming we are using hero points), would it be ok to pre-emptively declare something like:

Trip, Althletics, Panache: 1d20 + 6 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 6 + 1 = 13
If the D20 roll is <10, expend hero point and take the second roll.
Trip, Althletics, Panache: 1d20 + 6 + 1 ⇒ (11) + 6 + 1 = 18

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Plummeting Eagle Cai Fen weeps openly as the story concludes. So enraptured is he that he completely misses the fact that he won't be getting paid for this job. Masterful! Such a masterful tale, oh Bushy Bearded Borgith Bort. Your talents are being comparable to the masters of my homeland. It would be my honor to travel with your company

He begins rummaging in his pack for something to wipe away his tears.

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Indeed, Metal Maiden? I was having you figured as my stiffest competition. Honestly, I am a bit disappointed that I cannot test my mettle against yours. He looks a little despondent as he says this.

Oh, but there is being no need to be so formal. Please call me Plummeting Eagle Cai Fen. I am embarrassed to say I did not catch your name?

P.S. - If the caravan master chooses to read the letter it is
1 - Entirely in Tien
2 - The wrong letter. This one is from Worried Mother Cai Lyn to Hopeless Son, urging him to abandon his "idiot pursuits" and return home to be a proper scribe.

The doors to the inn burst open and a dark-haired figure runs in, quickly looks around, and rolls under the nearest table. Angry shouting can be heard outside, followed by a muffled I think he went that way! The commotion fades into the distance and the figure you saw crawls out from under the table, oblivious to the pointed looks of the patrons, and dusts itself off.

On closer inspection, this individual is a well-built man of Tien heritage whose embroidered silk tunic and wide white trousers suggest foreign roots. His piercing blue eyes scan the room until they fall on the caravan master.

With a quick run up, he attempts to leap onto the table and enter the Pose of the Resplendent Dragon at Half-past Teatime, extending an arm holding a letter toward Bort.
Acrobatics: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (17) + 6 = 23
Let’s see if I take a prat fall here…

Honor to you and your family, Bushy Bearded Bargith Bort. The locals were just informing me of a caravan master in need of guards. I urge you to be looking no further, for Radiant Cai Fen of the house of the Plummeting Eagle is here! I am having many years of caravan guard experience and have come highly recommended by my colleagues in the illustrious Tien Xia.

Belatedly he looks around at the group gathered around the table and an embarrassed expression creeps onto his face. My apologies. Clearly, I am not the first applicant, and it was quite rude of me to speak out of turn. Please, let me test my mettle against these people and prove to you that I am the guard that you want.

He shuffles off the table and comes to stand next to G’Nak. Interviews are so nerve wracking, right? he mumbles.