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A good portion of that encounter is left to the GM to adjudicate as they see fit. The goal of the encounter is to keep the guards from arresting Mireille (and to keep them from arresting the party, obviously). Players have a chance to be creative here. I would encourage GMs to react appropriately to the group's actions whatever they may be, but here's my suggestion for handling the use of Disguise.

The guards aren't expressly aware that Mireille is at the Fox Den, though she has been arrested before and will recognize her. The PCs can use Disguise to prevent this. Creating a disguise sufficient to avert the guard's attention takes 1d3 minutes of work as noted in the scenario, though otherwise works as a normal Disguise check. This may require some PCs to hold the guards at the door (or somewhere else) long enough for another player to disguise Mireille in an adjoining room. When the guards do encounter Mireille, they would make a Perception check against the result of the Disguise check. If they exceed that number, they recognize her and shift their questioning to reflect their suspicions. They know she's been caught disseminating "false" history in the past. I would have them make a show of discrediting her in front of the children, PCs, and the proprietor of the Fox Den. Have them make thinly veiled threats about the dangers of freely associating with people tarnishing the reputation of Thrune and its agents. At this point, PCs may have to interject with some Bluff checks, bribe the guards to look the other way, or take some other action to keep the guards from taking Mireille back to the Order of the Rack for further questioning, which would be a failure of the mission goals.

...this question came up for the Fox Den. What sort of establishment is this? Is it a bar, a tavern? It's never really specified.

I was intentionally vague so that people running it blind or just reading from the text wouldn't accidentally introduce certain themes to people they weren't prepared to introduce them to. The Fox Den is a brothel, though it is routinely re-purposed as a schoolhouse for the children of those who live and work in the district. I wanted to use the Red Light District Flip-Mat and thought it would be a disservice to shy too far away from the nature of the product. I liked the idea of using the environment in a way that wasn't exactly about the nature of the business people conduct there, and that represented a different facet of life in the "less reputable" corners of a large city.

...players at my table didn't know why she wanted to go back to her house either, considering it wasn't that far.

Though Mireille is scared of the law, it's not her that they were originally sent to find. The Hellknights are suspicious of the Pathfinders that left the meeting with Zefiro, and the Order of the Rack is almost certain that Zefiro is hiding something. They intend to put him and his associates away for good. Mireille doesn't know that specifically, but suspects that the inspection will turn up evidence of her involvement with spreading unlawful (truthful) details about Chelish history, something she's gotten into trouble for before. If she's caught again, it's likely she'll get disappeared, or worse. Since the guards weren't explicitly looking for her at the start of the encounter, and since they aren't aware of her current residence, she thinks getting back home is a good idea. She also needs to collect her things before leaving the city, something she does soon after the PCs depart, assuming they were successful in eluding the guards.

When I roleplay out the conclusion of that encounter, I have her show great interest in the library at the Grand Lodge, and the mission of the Pathfinders to rediscover the forgotten past. Ultimately, Mireille doesn't want the people she knew and loved to be forgotten. As an elf who grew up among humans, she sees carrying on the memory of her shorter-lived friends as a sacred duty. She asks the PCs if the chroniclers at the Society would be interested in learning about the people she knew before the Chelish civil war, people the current government doesn't want remembered. (This also helps reinforce the idea that Arenzo Davian is someone they can get information from later.) If the PCs speak favorably of their exploits as Pathfinders, she says she is bound for Absalom in the hopes that she might join their ranks, maybe even adventure around the world until she thinks it's safe for her to return to Corentyn.

I’ll start by telling you what I think a good map does. It sparks the imagination of the viewer. It whispers stories of events yet to come and invites a GM to spread their toes in a sandbox of creativity. It presents mysteries that need to be solved and beckons players to open every door, delivering on each area’s promise that more adventure awaits ahead. There are some technical elements that can help.

Is it readable? Yes

Are there multiple choices for the PCs to make? If not, does the map present a path for the action to flow in? It’s just one big room, so not really. I suppose they could go right, left, or straight up.

Does the map utilize the space well?

Are the elements presented well thought out and make sense for the environment? You mention that it’s meant to be paired with a rakshasa, which is a CR 10 creature, meaning PCs will be at least 6th level when they fight it and thereby have access to fly. That could break the encounter, but at least it would be requiring the use of one of the highest level spells a party is likely to have access to. As the party get’s higher level though, stairs become less and less of a hindrance. There are doors on the left and right, next to each set of stairs, but non on the far side of the room. Rooms like this are built to show off, and that usually means having the best view of the entire room upon entering it, which would be at the south side, opposite the door on the north. Also, the balcony serves as a place to address those entering or gathered below. There needs to be an entry hall opposite the balcony to sell me on the idea that this room actually serves a purpose. Finally, there needs to be more here. The floor design is intricate, which is nice. Your use of color is appropriate for the occupant, but you could have included additional elements to make this more interesting.

Is this a map I would like to use more than once? Easily. I play a lot of Pathfinder Society, and I’ve learned that Pathfinders attend a lot of dinner parties. Social encounters could use a room like this often, so I expect I could get a lot of mileage out of this map.

So, back to the initial question: does this map spark the imagination? I need a little more to work with. This is a good start, but it’s not quite there.

I’ll start by telling you what I think a good map does. It sparks the imagination of the viewer. It whispers stories of events yet to come and invites a GM to spread their toes in a sandbox of creativity. It presents mysteries that need to be solved and beckons players to open every door, delivering on each area’s promise that more adventure awaits ahead. There are some technical elements that can help.

Is it readable? Yes

Are there multiple choices for the PCs to make? If not, does the map present a path for the action to flow in? Once PCs find their way onto the thing, they can go through the front door, risk pushing through a tangle of overgrowth or break the glass somewhere. They’ll probably want to break the glass. Once inside, there’s a realistic layout that will be explored before it gets boring. Nicely done.

Does the map utilize the space well? At first glance, yes. There is one concern though. You designed it symmetrical, and that’s fine. It’s a beautiful design, but if you design a symmetrical structure, you have to work a little harder to make sure the PCs aren’t getting the same experience in both ends of the building. You do that wonderfully with Area B, but not as much in Area D. Essentially, you devoted two separate sections of your map to the same room. Sure, the vines are poking through, but I’m not sure that’s enough.

Are the elements presented well thought out and make sense for the environment? As noted, it’s a very well-designed building that looks like something we could see in the real-world. The landing is crumbling and there’s an excellent sense of history about the place. Players will want to know what it’s function was/is, and the answers to that question can largely be decided by the GM. You use color extremely well and there’s no doubt this will be a stunning final product.

Is this a map I would like to use more than once? A GM could use this building to serve a number of functions.

So, back to the initial question: does this map spark the imagination? It certainly does.

I’ll start by telling you what I think a good map does. It sparks the imagination of the viewer. It whispers stories of events yet to come and invites a GM to spread their toes in a sandbox of creativity. It presents mysteries that need to be solved and beckons players to open every door, delivering on each area’s promise that more adventure awaits ahead. There are some technical elements that can help.

Is it readable? Yes, but some elements are confusing. Are the chains made of clouds, or are they metal chains that disappear into the center of the cloud mass? Either could be fun.

Are there multiple choices for the PCs to make? If not, does the map present a path for the action to flow in? There’s more than one building and some issues with getting between the two. So yes, but those same issues are probably less important than it would seem in most cases. If PCs are venturing among the clouds, chances are they’ve invested in methods to fly.

Does the map utilize the space well? I’m conflicted here. On the one hand, the map is trying to sell me on the idea that it was once home to at least one cloud giant. I think they would need more space, and you could have made the entire map be one wing of a partially destroyed cloud palace. On the other hand, there aren’t any open-air sky maps with a nice perspective that I’m aware of. If there’s supposed to be some intense aerial combat happening between the PCs and something else up here, then having some room to zip around could help. I would welcome the tiny ships below to serves as an artistic backdrop to such a fight. I would have the ship flip-mats available too so we could have some PCs dealing with a split encounter, one above, one below.

Are the elements presented well thought out and make sense for the environment? As mentioned, this is meant to be a cloud giant’s palace. Even partially destroyed, there just isn’t enough surface area for me to believe that. They’re huge creatures and the entire wing of the building is only 20 feet across. Maybe if it was open on three of the 4 sides, as if all but one wall had collapsed as the cloud dissipated, then I could believe it.

Is this a map I would like to use more than once? I’d have to work really hard to get more mileage out of this map.

So, back to the initial question: does this map spark the imagination? It does, but there’s enough missed opportunities in the design elements to make voting for it a difficult decision.

I’ll start by telling you what I think a good map does. It sparks the imagination of the viewer. It whispers stories of events yet to come and invites a GM to spread their toes in a sandbox of creativity. It presents mysteries that need to be solved and beckons players to open every door, delivering on each area’s promise that more adventure awaits ahead. There are some technical elements that can help.

Is it readable? Yes, but black text on a dark red background is pushing the boundaries of legibility.

Are there multiple choices for the PCs to make? If not, does the map present a path for the action to flow in? PCs could venture into through the stables first, or barge in through the front door. There’s not a lot of options, but the ones that are there could present different challenges that effectively let the players choose what kind of encounter they want. Combat, stealth, diplomacy? This map could serve all of those.

Does the map utilize the space well? Well enough. The wide open foundry floor beckons the use of bull rush, and from more than one angle.

Are the elements presented well thought out and make sense for the environment? While the foundry floor does present some interesting actions in combat, I don’t see why they have so much metal remaining in a molten state at once. If they do need that much metal, then there should be massive casting equipment as well. Where is the heat that keeps this stuff liquid coming from? If there’s display cabinets for metal-made items, then I’m to assume those items are made on-site. Where’s the anvils? Why does a foundry need an 8-stall stable? Why would they build one walkway half as wide as the other when it’s built over the largest vat of metal?

Is this a map I would like to use more than once? In this regard, the stable does add to the utility, and I can think of more than one time a metalworks could appear in a campaign.

So, back to the initial question: does this map spark the imagination? It does, but most of those ideas involve re-imagining your core concept at another location, or in a different, bigger structure. I’m having to work hard to justify the more unusual elements with excuses that don’t just default to “because magic?”

Congratulations on earning your place among this year’s Top 32, Vadims! Let’s see what thoughts the quill of leng conjures in my mind as I read it.

• I love it when an item uses components from creatures found in the world. We make use of creatures in our world. It stands to reason that residents of any fantasy world would be doing the same, and there’s all sorts of creative ideas waiting for when someone finds out what darkmantle dung is good for.
• Messing with magical scripts should have consequences, and you do well by animating the words as a swarm. Fun!
• The swarm treats the creator as an ally, but what about the other party members? One of the more memorable moments of a game I ran was when a player summoned a swarm without realizing they couldn’t control it.
• The swarm is pretty weak, which would be forgivable if the price of the item is reduced considerably. Others have presented some alternative ideas for making this work better.
• I love having ways to burn consumables I’m not likely to use. If a group doesn’t have a wizard, then someone with this item could make good use out of those scrolls the adventure just threw at us.
• An antagonist could get up to some trickery with this item, or have a minion sneaking into the party’s emergency scrolls while a combat rages on. There’s some fun ways to use this item, be it in the hands of the GM or the players.

Congratulations on earning a spot in this year’s Top 32, Kiel! Here’s some thoughts I had while reading your description of the bottled cloud:

• It has a simple name that tells us exactly what we’re getting. The magic of it is that it’s a fantastic and magical concept that captures the imagination instantly.
• The description is concise and evocative, but does seem like you were checking off boxes on the sensory information card. The “whoomp sound” feels out of place.
• The first power is pretty neat, and I can think up all kinds of uses for this item for both NPCs and players.
• The second power is what sells me on its place in the Top 32 though. Having a player’s action turn it into a storm cloud is extremely engaging, and adds to the usefulness of the item.
• A small, cheap consumable with this kind of utility should probably cost a little more though. As written, roleplaying reasons are the only thing standing in the way of me making sure every character I play carries one.

Greetings, Taylor, and congratulations on earning a spot in this year’s Top 32! Here’s some of my thoughts regarding the spiraled madu:

• This shield has many small effects that work together to reinforce a central theme, a transforming shield.
• I want to put this in the hands of a powerful inevitable and then go Michael Bay on my players as I describe it whirling, clanking, spiraling, and modulating to suit whatever action it performs next, ramping up the player's terror with each new iteration of the base shield’s form. They don’t have to know it’s just conferring some extra AC on a charge at first, but when it starts shredding their armor it might cause some pants soiling.
• It’s variable enough that I could see most players trying to use it after looting it.
• It’s a fun item that adds something to a wide variety of popular combat options in a fun, flavorful way.
• Staying aware of what it can do while also keeping track of a myriad of monster abilities could make for a headache, but one that is probably worth it.
• An exciting description keeps me interested while reading each option.

Congratulations on earning a spot in this year’s Top 32, Crystal! Here’s some thoughts I had while reviewing your figuring of wondrous power, ruby butterfly:

• Figurines of wondrous power have been dangerous design territory, so I’m excited to see how you go about convincing us to give this one a chance. Then you tell us it’s a ruby butterfly. I’m very intrigued, and I’m not even past the item name yet.
• Going for an inexpensive figurine is a wise choice.
• A little magic, ruby-winged butterfly is a fantastic image and very magical. Butterflies have long been used to incorporate a feeling of other-worldliness in stories. Tapping into that is brilliant.
• Using the stats for a bat works for me. It’s delicate, but it’s also relatively unassuming. If GMs go after this in the middle of a fight with their bad guy their better be a good reason, or no other targets to choose from. If that’s the case, then the player deserves to be out 5,400 gold though.
• The power that really sells this item to me is the bonus to saves against dream attacks. I agree with Victoria that the effects this protects against should be expanded to other effects that attack dreams though. What this ability really does is suggest a wider world. It gets players to be concerned about forces outside their immediate sphere of influence. It gets them to see their characters as part of a larger world. That’s one of the best things a magic item can do.
• A spellcaster NPC could make use of this to have some fun against the PCs. As a GM, I would have to smirk when the big dumb brute in the party annihilates it with one blow, simultaneously destroying a large share of their treasure. It’s always better when the PCs sow their own mistakes.

Good job on earning your spot in this year’s Top 32, Donald. I’m here with some thoughts on your item, the daylight diadem.

• Alliteration is fun, and awesome, when used well. You have used it well in this case.
• Including a major and minor use for the flowers was a good idea. The wearer can play it safe if that fits their playstyle, or burn all the flowers going all-out. Items that require resource management that aren’t one-use are fun.
• Wonderful recharge mechanic, even if it does need to be a little more defined.
• I would have to work pretty hard to give an antagonist this item. I generally prefer items to be more GM friendly. Player-only items just tend to make the game easier for them and less fun for the GM. Be wary of that trap going forward.
• That said, this could work well as a quest item, or something found on a good NPC’s corpse.
• It’s a flavor-rich treasure, no doubt, and if anything’s going to make the game easier for the PCs, I would like it to be done with exactly this kind of flair.

Maps should always have the scale included so that a viewer can make sense of them when read out of context.

Well done earning a place in the Top 32, Jarrett! Here’s some of my thoughts on your item:

• An fun idea, and one I can easily see capturing the imaginations of the players.
• In the hands of the antagonist, it will capture their screams as well!
• I agree with others in having trouble with the name. “Shark Toothed” made me think “sword” and then “Maw” stumped me. I never would have guess it was a cloak.
• There’s a good opening description here, but the opening two paragraphs should have been pruned quite a bit more with the editor’s pen. “On closer inspection,” “can be easily confused with…” and “hides a deadly function…” are all unnecessary phrases that rightfully draw a lot of criticism from the snark thread. Don’t waste words. The sooner you tell the reader what the item actually looks like, and what it actually does, the better.
• “Would look right at home on a stage harlequin.” Don’t tell me where it would look good. I’m the GM and I’ll put it wherever I want to put it. As with the advice above, all I’m looking for you to do it tell me what the item looks like physically, and what the item does. I don’t need you to tell the story of how or where to use it.
• Unlimited +1 daggers does seem a little too good for an item that costs less than 5,000gp to make. I’d be concerned about players getting one that early in their career, but I do like the idea of drawing daggers from the mesh of interwoven shark teeth.
• The spinning twirl of blades is a fun image. I actually envisioned it cinematically as you described it, looking down at it from above as it twirls, doling out lacerations and painting the floors with blood as the wearer dances. Very evocative idea.
• I like that the reflex save uses a variable save dependent on the wielders skill with the item. I know this is unusual for Paizo, but it’s a direction I don't mind seeing items heading. Integration with skills makes sense.
• Does the 15-foot radius start before the 5-foot step, after, or does it follow the wielder as they move? This needs to be clarified.

Congratulations on earning your spot in this year's Top 32, Isaac! Here's some thoughts on your item.

• “…covered in coarse grey fur, and the notched blade sharpens the wielder’s instincts when drawn.” Going from one subject matter, the look/feel of the item, to its effect on a person’s consciousness in the same sentence is somewhat jarring.
  
• Does the ally making the trip need to be threatening the target of the strike?
  
• I like that the Intimidate check does not have a static bonus linked to the item. Items should remain useful for longer, and that helps.
  
• Letting allies join in on the howl is inspired. Very fun idea.
  
• The abilities, particularly the howl/reposition, are thematically linked well to the idea of the item, a wolf pack closing in on and cornering their prey.
  
• I like game mechanics that encourage players to pay attention to each other's abilities and think more tactically as a result.
  
• This is something I would love to give an antagonist in a campaign, but that I could see a party loving to keep around instead of just selling.

I can see why this made it into the Top 32, and I'm looking forward to seeing what you come up with next.

Making the game easier does not mean you've made it more fun.

Congratulations Monica!

First let me express how thankful I am for the opportunity to participate in this contest again. I don’t expect to win, but it’s been a fun ride and I’ve learned a great deal. I didn’t really understand the nuances of making a proposal (see sections below) and if nothing else I hope that the improvement I’ve shown from my encounter entry in 2014 to my encounter entry this year will show everyone that provided me with feedback that I will make great use of it. My next adventure proposal, wherever that might be, will be stronger for the kindness you’ve all shown me in offering your opinions. Thank you.

Below you’ll find insight into my thought process while designing this adventure proposal. I regret that some of the intent I had didn’t translate to the proposal very well and I’ll fully admit that to be a failing with how I wrote it. In trying to assemble the nuts and bolts of the proposal, I left too much of what I wanted to convey to hang on too little, a mistake I won’t make again. I hope you’ll find my thoughts on what went into this entertaining though.

Names: Naming is one of the areas I spend a lot of time deliberating, and is usually the last thing I decide on. I did not expect any of the names I listed here to remain throughout the design process. I thought Journey into Midnight was the closest to being a finished title, with a simple elegance that almost came too close to just outright stating what the adventure was about, and in that regard could be seen as a little boring. I had glanced at the Second Darkness AP early in this year’s contest and must have subconsciously picked up on the title Descent into Midnight. The Google results didn’t turn up anything of significance so that’s the title I went with. Obviously it’s near identical to a product Paizo already released and it needs to get changed. Alternatives titles that I feared would be criticized as too outlandish were The Bramblebuck Beckoning and The Tale of the Half-Fiend’s Brew.

Other naming issues included the name “Grower,” which I settled on after reading an entry about duergar naming conventions on d20pfsrd, which was the only notation I could find about what kind of names duergar have. I thought it was silly too, but the idea that they just named each other after their jobs made sense to me given the worker nature of their society and I didn’t dig deeper to find more. Obviously I should have.

I gave a lot of thought to what kind of names flail snails and vegepygmies would have. They have no spoken language which presents some interesting problems when it comes to naming them. I look forward to pondering this issue at greater length regardless of the outcome of this contest.

Theme: Nar-Voth is described as being 0-2000 feet below the surface, so I wanted to play up the idea that this is an alien world still influenced by things from the surface. Not being able to speak easily with potentially hostile life forms was meant to be a continuing problem and a central mechanism to making this strange world hit home with the PCs. When the vegepygmies “attempt to communicate” (I was very specific with my wording in the proposal) with the PCs it represents a defining moment for the players, when they are first given the opportunity to realize that things work differently in the Darklands and attempt to work through it, or continue to murder everything in sight as adventurers sometimes do. The players can succeed in their mission regardless of the style of adventure they pick.

I wanted to highlight Nar-Voth as its own world, separate from the world above, but still close enough to be heavily influenced by it. That and its underground wilderness themes were what set it apart from Sekamina and Orv, in my mind at least. I thought the roots and the rotting vegetation of the Whispering Wood above as major influencing factors in this subterranean world would help to convey these ideas and remind players how dangerously close Nar-Voth actually is, even while the creatures that live there demonstrate how alien they are when compared to the surface. It’s an entirely different world, happening just beneath their feet.

Monsters: If the encounters seem somewhat disconnected it’s because I wanted to convey a sense of exploration while the PCs spent time underground. I didn’t accomplish this as masterfully as I would have liked though. Elements of each area were meant to influence things taking place in the other two areas. A situation in the Mulch Fens would give the PCs something to do or react to in both the Eternity Bluff and the Broken Corridor. This would help players gain a sense of forward momentum and reasons to explore each of the other areas. While I knew that’s where I wanted to go with it, I wasn’t able to fully realize how within the time constraints of the contest.

I didn’t think I needed to go into the motivations of each and every monster in the proposal, though I certainly could have. The dire bats are there because the monks kept them as pets and fed them to ensure that denizens of Nar-Voth couldn’t easily gain entry to the lift and the monastery above. I was going to make the wayang a Pathfinder (who are swarming the Inner Sea Region if the local PFS meta is any indication) looking to chronicle the monk’s wisdom. A 9th level druid with the vermin heart feat can awaken a giant slug, and sent this one on an expedition to learn more about the flail snails, equipping it with an item to aid in communicating with them. I didn’t think the word count limit warranted going into the backstory of every creature at this time, though I would have developed those motivations for a final product and explained why the encounters work the way they do. Did bats in a cave and rusty chains really need to be explained in a short proposal? Ok.

The vegepygmy monks were something I wanted to surprise players with, while simultaneously making vegepygmy a challenge for 5th level adventurers. I realize that memory-stealing vegepygmies are something unusual and would have liked to suggest that they be made a variant of the standard vegepygmy. I wasn’t sure that was allowed by the contest rules though, as we were told to create an original creature. I didn’t want to risk being told that a variant vegepygmy wasn’t original enough, or that I wasn’t allowed to have two new monsters. I see that others created similar variations though so I should have just called it out in the proposal as an added feature. I’m still not sure if that would be acceptable or not though.

I also tried to use the upcoming Dungeons Deep Pathfinder Battles miniature line as a source for inspiration for the encounters, because I like having a use for cool new minis. This may have exacerbated the somewhat scattered feeling of the encounters, but I think I could have tied them together a little more in the processes of fleshing out the adventure.

Villains: I understand the idea that a proper villain should be a motivating force behind events in the adventure and give PCs something to actively work toward overcoming, but I also don’t think that always needs to be the case. In this instance, I was wanted to incorporate evidence of the dragon’s presence throughout the exploration of the Midnight Jungle, giving the players a sense of growing dread with the realization that there’s something big and very bad down there with them, something they haven’t seen yet, something none of them knows about. This kind of reveal can create tension throughout the survival-nature of the adventure and still foreshadow a great fight at the end. I felt a primal, First World “root” dragon would fit in perfectly in Nar-Voth, thanks to the surface-world influence of the Whispering Wood root system and the ecological nuances of the new creature. I get that personal taste in style could influence one’s reaction to this though and respect the judge’s decision to disagree.

The First World dragon is something I only developed after two iterations of my first idea were rejected as being “highly inappropriate for lower level play.” What can I say? I like big theatrical encounters that make my characters vow to retire if they make it through mostly in one piece. An ill-fated persistence to make the idea work anyway could have been at fault for this whole proposal not coming together as well as it should have. I know better too. Sometimes it’s best to let go and refocus on a new idea, but I really wanted to make the flail snails work and ultimately trying to retrofit the first idea probably just clouded my creativity and the proposal suffered for it. Originally they played a much more influential role, with the aberrant bloodrager flail snail being the villain against the backdrop of something much larger. I’m still pretty excited about the original idea though and will probably write it up anyway just for fun.

As a side note: I made the lead flail snail an aberrant bloodrager so that it could benefit from being twice as fast as any of its brethren (movement speed 20!), have additional reach and rage. The thought of a blisteringly fast berserker flail snail made me deliriously happy and I thought it would be a fun surprise for players after they thought they figured out the flail snails in earlier encounters.

Final thoughts: Please feel free to message me if you’d like to know my thoughts on something I left out. I’ve had a great time participating in RPG Superstar again. I look forward to offering feedback to others next year and show the same courtesy others have afforded me this year and the year before. I am ever grateful for the efforts put forward by the staff at Paizo and the RPGS commnity.

Again, thank you and happy gaming everyone.

The contest isn't necessarily about entertaining the contest viewers though. It's about finding freelancers who will entertain the viewers later with good product.

I have mixed feelings about the tight deadlines, but I can certainly see what they're supposed to achieve. There were times during the encounter round when I wondered if I would have taken the assignment with only three week days to work on it. But I am more confident now that I know I can produce something worthwhile in so short a time.

The Nar-Voth theme (or the urban and River Kingdoms themes of years past) also serves a specific purpose in finding good freelancers. It shows what a different group of people will do when instructed to work with similar material. Comparing a series of encounters all taking place in Nar-Voth and all written by different authors can give you information about those designers and the way they'll handle other material in the future. If the designers are left to roam in whatever region they like the most, then you might well end up with better pitches, but the picture you get of the writer's abilities will be more clouded. Paizo wants to know if a designer can deliver what they need, and I bet that doesn't always allow for the writer to do what they want.

Restricting the writers to a narrower design space is the best way to see what kind of designers they are when compared to each other.

I should probably get around to posting my thoughts about the geomaw’s design now that it’s so popular with the Top 8 in the encounter round. First, I’d like to express my profound thanks. I am deeply honored that my creature inspired so many among this year’s talented Top 8.

Everyone who took the time to offer feedback on the geomaw has my gratitude as well. Thank you. I appreciate the effort you made to write a response and will put those critiques to good use when considering future design work. Here’s some of my thoughts about my choices and missteps, what I think worked and what I might have done differently if time had allowed.

The Gloomsworn Path
==========
Those wishing an audience with the dark fey Queen Frilogarma would first need to find passage to the stalactite city known in the deep of Nar-Voth as the Court of Ether. There are numerous ways to take to the queen’s fantastical city, yet none are bereft of mortal peril. The Gloomsworn Path was one such route and stood until recently at the precipice of the Endless Gulf, presenting a near insurmountable barrier to those who walked its trail uninvited. Dark folk sentries and allies of the Queen long ago employed the use of gloomwasps to secure the passage, allowing the temperamental creations to flourish in the unending dark. After a time, the dark folk abandoned their posts, leaving the passage’s protection in the capable embrace of the swarm that matured there.

The Gloomsworn Path is now in disarray, savaged by the crashing tide of a purple worm that burrowed to the hive’s heart and gorged itself before succumbing to grievous wounds inflicted by the hive once moved to wrath. Yet few of the gloomwasps survived the assault, and the hive fell to ruin around the hulking predator that still festers within it. Pressing a newfound advantage, svirfneblin spies dared to take the broken hive and establish permanent refuge for those that would stand against the Court of Ether. They fell in the attempt, but not before nearly exterminating what remained of the hive’s inhabitants. Less than a handful of the once mighty gloomwasp swarm remain, and Queen Frilogarma would not have a route to her city persist long without guard. Upon word of the Path’s newfound vulnerability, she dispatched two nuglub trapsmiths to the colony while she entreats the dark folk to resume their vigil over the area.

The path is not likely to remain so lightly fortified for long.

The Court of Corpses (CR 10)
==========
A1. Entry Hall
Few of the numerous cages built into the walls of this debris-strewn chamber stand empty. Fresh svirfneblin corpses are held aloft by dark vines that puncture the earth behind them, as if reaching out to present a silent warning to those who would dare to travel further. The cavern’s eastern entrance is clogged with thick roots that form a path leading through a smooth gray wall.

The thick root-like vines mark the beginning of the Gloomsworn Path, a twisting mass of plant growth that mires in the rock here and then travels the miles-long ceiling of the Endless Gulf, twisting from stalactite to stalactite before arriving at the Court of Ether. Its thick bark-like exterior is carpeted with delicate strands of fungal growth, each topped with a tiny phosphorescent nodule that glows dimly in a 15-foot radius when disturbed. Creatures moving at more than half speed over the vine bridge set the path they took to glowing for one round in their wake.

The cages hold what remains of creatures that dared to trespass near the Court of Ether and also include corpses more human in appearance and in varying states of decay. The iron bars (hardness 10, 30 hp, Break DC 23) are held fast with good locks (Disable Device DC 25)

Creatures: A single gloomwasp in the northernmost cage is hiding amidst the vines and watching for intruders. When the gloomwasps numbers were more plentiful, they would assault enemies from behind the cage bars, retreating to the hive only when left no other recourse.

Gloomwasp CR 6
XP 2,400
hp 66 (R3)
Tactics: When PCs enter the cavern it first alerts the gloomwasp in area A2 with its telepathy then casts dust of twilight on the PCs if they are using light sources, or attacks with one light ray at the nearest PC before retreating through the small tunnel entrance at the cage’s ceiling. It then attempts to regroup with the other gloomwasp and nuglub in area A2.

A2. The Hive
The smell of rot ladens the air of this chamber, which consists of a vine bridge extending from a cave opening to the southwest and reaching to the cavern ceiling to the northeast. The husks of dead gloomwasps are scattered across the hexagonal floor, which is dominated at its center by the still remains of a gargantuan purple worm, its burned and blistered body dangling off a precipice of hive cells that sags under its immense weight.

The massive weight of the purple worm collapsed much of the hive’s support structure when it burrowed in, causing the lower layers of the hive to tear free and fall to the cavern below. Grievously wounded gloomwasp crawled from its mouth before succumbing to injury and death on the cell floor where their bodies yet remain.

Creatures: Two nuglub gremlins and another gloomwasp are here on the command of Queen Frilogarma to ensure attempts to reach the Court of Ether do not go un-harassed. If given warning of the PCs presence one nuglub attempts to hide behind the corpse of the purple worm, between the vine path and the comb support. The other nuglub and gloomwasp try to hide amidst the stalactites in the northeast corner of the map until both gloomwasps are present. If caught unaware, the trio is toiling at the hive cells in the southeast quadrant of the hive.

Gloomwasp CR 6
XP 2,400
hp 66 (R3)
Tactics: The gloomwasp fights to the death, hovering outside of the PCs reach in the space between the cavern wall and the north side of the hive.

Gremlin, Nuglub (2) CR 2
XP 600 each
hp 19 each (Bestiary 2 143)
Tactics: The nuglub attempt to rupture larva cells on PCs who were damaged by the gloomwasp’s light rays and to trigger the falling worm trap while safely on the southern side of the vine path. The nuglub flee if reduced to half or fewer hit points, drawing the PCs over areas prepared with snare traps, marked with an 's" on the map.

Trap: The purple worm remains a threat even in death, as the nuglubs have carefully cut away cells holding it aloft so that it might fall when larger intruders step toward it to investigate. If any medium-size or larger creature steps onto a hive cell adjacent to the worm, the entire corpse will slide off to the cavern below, tearing away all hive cells north of the bridge with it. A small size creature can trigger the weakened floor by spending a standard action stomping and kicking the floor adjacent to the worm.

Weakened Floor CR 5
Type mechanical; Perception DC 20; Disable Device N/A
----- Effects -----
Trigger location; Reset repair
Effect 100-foot fall into collapsed gloomwasp hive (2d6 non-lethal plus 6d6 lethal); multiple targets (all creatures on hive cells north of the vine bridge); DC 18 Reflex save avoids. Note: damage from fall lessoned to account for air-pocketed hive structure on the cavern floor below.

Trap: The ceiling, suspended 10 feet above, is the uppermost layer of the hive. Many of the cells overhead still contained gloomwasp larva when the purple worm destroyed the hive. Without the support of the colony, those larva have died and began to putrefy. A phosphorescent fungus known as pulsing puffs has invaded some of the dead cells (marked on the map with an ‘R’,) which now have swirling masses of tiny lights glowing faintly from behind distended wax coverings. These cells are on the verge of bursting, and will rain down the rotting, radioactive slurry the gloomwasp larvae were gestating in when triggered. Injured opponents risk infection by the invasive phosphorescent fungi.

Bursting Larva Cell CR 3
Type mechanical; Perception DC 20; Disable Device DC 20
----- Effects -----
Trigger touch; Reset none
Effect Shower of irradiated rotting pus and gloomwasp larva corpse (exposure to pulsing puffs plus advance radiation poisoning effects by 1 day); multiple targets (all creatures in square); DC 20 Reflex save avoids.

Pulsing Puffs
Type disease (fungus), injury; Save Fortitude DC 16
Onset 1 day; Frequency 1/day
Effect 1d4 Dex damage; Cure 2 consecutive saves

Development: If a nuglub manages to flee, it attempts to reach the Court of Ether to warn of the PCs attack, scurrying along on the underside of the vine bridge as necessary to avoid the PCs harassment. If presented with the opportunity, it gleefully attempts to kneecap any PC that catches up to it, even if the action turns out to be suicidally foolish.

Ok, then...TOP 8, Sound off! What geographic area (state/country/plane of existence) are you from?

I am pleased to have been raised amidst the gaming traditions of the fair state of Wisconsin. Though originally from Green Bay, I am now a resident of Milwaukee.

A whirlpool of gnashing, jagged blood red crystals fold together like petals to reveal a creature whose outer body consists of stone plates, dark earth and red-hued gemstones.

Geomaw CR 7

XP 3,200
N Large aberration (earth)
Init +2; Senses blindsight 40 ft.; Perception +13

----- Defense -----
AC 19, touch 7, flat-footed 19 (-2 Dex, +12 natural, -1 size)
hp 85 (10d8+40)
Fort +9, Ref +3, Will +7
Defensive Abilities blood lantern; DR 5/piercing
Weaknesses blind, blood gorger

----- Offense -----
Speed 10 ft., burrow 20 ft.
Melee bite +15 (2d6+10 plus grab)
Space 10 ft.; Reach 5 ft.
Special Attacks crystal gnasher, fast swallow, swallow whole (2d6+10 damage plus 2 Con damage, AC 16, 8 hp)

----- Statistics -----
Str 24, Dex 7, Con 18, Int 6, Wis 11, Cha 13
Base Atk +7; CMB +15 (+19 grapple); CMD 23 (can’t be tripped)
Feats Great Fortitude, Improved Initiative, Lightning Reflexes, Power Attack, Weapon Focus (bite)
Skills Perception +13, Stealth +7 (+15 in rocky areas); Racial Modifiers +8 Stealth in rocky areas
Languages Canto
SQ freeze

----- Ecology -----
Environment any underground
Organization solitary
Treasure incidental plus blood crystals

----- Special Abilities -----
Blood Gorger (Ex) A geomaw that has swallowed a creature whole devotes much of its body to the task of devouring it and loses its burrow speed.
Blood Lantern (Su) As a free action on any round in which a victim it has swallowed whole suffers Con damage, a geomaw may emit a scintillating pattern of red-hued light from the crystals that cover the outside of its body. All creatures within 30 feet must succeed on a DC 16 Will save or be fascinated. This is a sight-based, mind-affecting compulsion effect. A creature that saves cannot be affected by the same geomaw’s blood lantern for 24 hours. The save DC is Charisma-based.
Crystal Gnasher (Ex) Rows of razor sharp blood crystal line a geomaw’s oversized mouth. Its bite deals damage as a creature one size category larger.
Freeze (Ex) A geomaw can hold itself so still it appears to be a cluster of naturally occurring cave crystals. A geomaw that uses freeze can take 20 on its Stealth check to hide in plain sight as a patch of natural cavern crystals.

Birthed from the unfathomable terrors and untold wonders of the cavernous deep, geomaws roam the Darklands finding easy prey among the covetous races of Nar-Voth and Golarion’s surface. Their hulking bodies can extend up to 15 feet long and almost as wide, weighing between 2,000 and 4,000 pounds. Despite its great size, a geomaw requires sustenance infrequently and can go weeks or even months between meals. It can wait perfectly motionless, displaying its open maw as a cache of valuable crystalline formations. This ruse bears some truth. Duergar, derro and even drow hunt geomaw for the blood crystals that grow in them, while dark folk have devised sacrificial rituals so that they may feed on the faint blood-tinged rays of light resulting from a geomaw’s digestion process.

Geomaw have little society of their own and seem content to traverse the outskirts of wilder civilizations, feeding on the blood and flesh of unwary creatures that seek shelter or riches by delving into caves near the surface. On the rare occasion one cares to converse, it does so through a series of thumps and clinks produced by tapping its crystalline teeth together. Groups of geomaw have been known to produce hauntingly beautiful sounds in such a manner.

Salvation's End

I do intend to write more. My local PFS groups weren't interested in more than one or two Emerald Spire levels a month, so they only just completed level 6. I'll be writing the introduction for level 7 soon as a result. I originally planned just to write them as I ran them, but I finished levels 4-6 much earlier to accommodate a board member that wanted to use them for a marathon game day. If there's a demand for me to finish these at a faster pace I will certainly make an effort to oblige.

I regard the information in this thread as excellent insight into what many players expect in their games. Understanding your audience is paramount for anyone that creates content of any kind and many writers (myself included) love to see this kind of unfettered commentary about what people do and do not like.

That said, here are some of the things I consider when voting:

• Does the designer of the item understand the importance of action economy and its role in game balance?
  
• Does the item create options that weren't available in the game before, and do those options show creativity beyond simple combinations of existing item properties?
  
• Has the designer considered the implications of what the item can do and been clear about the how the item functions in relation to existing game mechanics?
  
• Can the item be used to good effect by an antagonist, and will the item be fun loot after the antagonist is defeated?
  
• Does the item warrant consideration over items commonly accepted as "best in slot" items without being obviously better than those items? I want my players to be eager to keep an item even though there's probably mathematically superior items they could use gold to buy.

Anything on the summon monster and summon nature's ally spell lists that haven't been done yet.

Certainly all good items need to be fun for the players to use, but it's a special joy to find an item that will have them crying out in horror when the villain uses it against them first. An evil grin on my face usually means it gets my vote.

Pyroclastic Spike
Aura moderate transmutation; CL 7th
Slot none; Price 28,000 gp; Weight 5 lbs.

Description
This 3-foot long magically-reinforced obsidian rod is capped with a globe of volcanic glass at one end, and a gleaming spike at the other. Veins of molten earth glow faintly beneath the rod’s surface, flowing from a swirling fiery mass at the orb’s core.

Three times per day on command, the wielder may activate the rod to receive temporary resistance to fire as if under the effects of resist energy, gaining 20 points of fire resistance for 1 hour.

Once per day, the spiked end can be driven into sand, mud, or loose earth as a move action, into dense soil or loose gravel as a standard action, or into stone or metal as a full-round action. Once anchored, a path 5 feet wide and 30 feet long erupts with rivulets of lava in the direction of the wielder’s choosing, originating in a square adjacent to the anchored pyroclastic spike. Creatures standing in the path take 2d6 fire damage as the ground spews forth super-heated sulfuric gases and begins to liquefy. 1 round after anchoring the rod, the affected area dissolves into a molten river 5 feet deep. The river of lava damages any barriers it encounters until it is able to flow freely forward to the full range of effect. The lava persists until the pyroclastic spike is removed from the ground, at which point the affected area immediately cools. Any creature in the lava is allowed a Reflex save (DC 16) to escape before the area is hardened to obsidian.

Construction
Requirements Craft Rod, firefall, resist energy; Cost 14,000 gp

Level 4 presented a bit of a conundrum. I'm hoping this mission will help to reconcile the chronicle's success conditions with the Pathfinder Society's general goals. I made some notes regarding this after the read-aloud text in the spoiler-hidden section below.

The prior missions usually make the "missing" Pathfinder completely inconsequential to the real mission. It's more along the lines of "oh, that's what happened to them. Moving on now." It would be great to have a quest where you need to slug someone's body over your shoulders and bring it back for a resurrection or proper burial and really drive home the value of all that prestige you've been accumulating.

Below are Pathfinder Society read-aloud missions and knowledge checks for each level of the Emerald Spire super dungeon. (Not all of the levels are complete yet, and I will be updating this thread as I write more.) While each level’s mission is meant to stand alone, I did try to create a sense of forward momentum for the Pathfinder Society as agents delve deeper into the dungeon.

I also wanted to inject some of the flavor found in parts of the book that PFS players may not get access to otherwise, which accounts for some of the regional information and quest NPCs showing up in the missions and checks.

I’ve also uploaded them as a single document to the GM Shared Prep Site

The Emerald Spire

I'm inclined to believe the wording is intentional. It's called the "trusty buddy" after all, and I find the idea of a mundane crowbar being the answer when all other forms of attack fail to be quite hilarious and awesome.

I don't believe the kinds of creatures that this would prove superior against (DR/-- and DR/epic) are prevalent enough in PFS scenarios to really make this a "must have" item for most players. I know I would prefer an adamantine greatsword for my two-handed melee characters against pretty much every encounter I've played through to date, and the extra investment in improvised weapon feats for every other character seems extraneous in most cases. I'll admit, the trusty buddy is good, really good even. I would still allow it to work as written at my table precisely because the quirkiness of the item would make it really easy to describe the action of the encounter in a fun, flavorful way.

Burning embers glow between the coal-like, smoke wreathed plates that make up this insectile creature’s body.

Emberling CR 2
XP 600
N Small construct
Init +3; Senses darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision; Perception +0
----- Defense -----
AC 14, touch 10, flat-footed 14 (-1 Dex, +4 natural, +1 size)
hp 26 (3d10+10)
Fort +1, Ref +0, Will +1
Defensive Abilities tempered plating; Immune construct traits, fire
----- Offense -----
Speed 20 ft.
Melee bite +5 (1d4+3)
Special Attacks forge spark, bellowing cloud
Spell-Like Abilities (CL 3rd; concentration +3)
Constant—detect magic
----- Statistics -----
Str 14, Dex 9, Con —, Int 2, Wis 11, Cha 6
Base Atk +3; CMB +4; CMD 13 (can’t be tripped)
Feats Blind-Fight, Improved Initiative
Skills Climb +9; Racial Modifiers +4 Climb
----- Ecology -----
Environment any urban
Organization solitary, pair, or colony (3-6)
Treasure standard (combustibles, magic)
----- Special Abilities -----
Bellowing Cloud (Su) As a standard action once per day, an emberling may stoke the fire within its body and surround itself with a cloud of smoke and soot. This effect is similar to obscuring mist except that it has a duration of 3 minutes and creatures within the cloud must make a Fortitude save each round (DC 11, +1 per previous check) or spend that round choking and coughing. A creature that chokes for 2 consecutive rounds takes 1d6 points of nonlethal damage. The save DC is Constitution-based.
Forge Spark (Ex) An emberling’s body erupts in an explosion of sparks when struck. Creatures that damage an emberling while adjacent to it must make a Reflex save (DC 11) or take 1d6 fire damage and become dazzled for 1 round. The save DC is Constitution-based.
Tempered Plating (Ex) Cold damage causes an emberling’s steel-like exterior to cool and harden, granting it hardness 5 and suppressing forge spark for 1d4 rounds. Dousing an emberling with water causes the same effect, though for only 1 round.

Animated by residual magic combining with creosote deposits in the crucibles of Golarion’s busiest forges, an emberling’s body consists of thick layers of carbon-rich plating that house a burning heart as hot as any forge fire. They scuttle across the ground on dozens of legs that resemble metal shavings and are adept at clinging to the walls of the exhaust vents in which they lair.

A newly formed colony of emberlings is content to bask in the heat of the flames that spawned them, though when these fires are doused and the vents begin to cool, they’ll spread across a city in search of new soot stained hearths to occupy. Vaguely aware of the process that formed them, some emberlings instinctively search out magic items to place in their lairs among other combustibles in an effort to create more of their kind. This activity, along with startled chimney sweeps and discontent residents that find they are sharing their home, is one of many reasons for district-wide fires erupting amidst an unsuspecting city populace.

Emberlings are extremely irritable, quick to anger, and attack relentlessly from a cloud of choking smoke and ash when provoked. Where magic arms and armor regularly fall between hammer and anvil, an emberling likely lies in a bed of cinders nearby.

When I think back on years of gaming, encounters with a bulette stick out as some of my most memorable. Thank you voters and judges who felt I did the land shark some justice with the Groundbreaker Cloak.

I'm honored to be among this year's Top 32, and will be aiming to unleash something worthy of RPG Superstar in the fight ring of Round 2!

Before that though, I'm going to join Christopher Dudley in yelling "I'M A LAAAAAAAND SHAAAAAAAARK!!" Thank you.

Groundbreaker Cloak
Aura moderate transmutation; CL 9th
Slot shoulders; Price 22,000 gp; Weight 6 lbs.
Description
This heavy dirt-caked cloak is made from the hide of a bulette, and features a plated dorsal fin that crests between the shoulders. As a standard action, the wearer may dive into the ground, gaining a burrow speed of 20 feet through sand, soil, gravel and stone. While burrowing, the wearer cannot run or charge, and travels along the surface, the exposed dorsal plate visible from above. As the wearer burrows, displaced dirt swells before him and collapses behind him to create difficult terrain in his wake. He has cover from attacks while burrowing, and can choose to make a free combat maneuver check against creatures standing on spaces he burrows through, causing them to fall prone if the check succeeds by 5 or more. Emerging from the ground is a move action that does not provoke attacks of opportunity.

Once per day, the wearer may perform a charge by diving deep into the ground, burrowing in a straight line beneath any obstacles and bursting forth into the air with sudden and extreme ferocity. This use of the cloak does not disturb the terrain as noted above, except where the wearer enters and exits the ground. The wearer ends this movement standing and the target of the charge is considered flat-footed against the attack.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, beast shape III, burrow; Cost 11,000 gp

If he fled because he was injured or out of resources, and returns when he has those resources back, then each encounter would be worth the full xp. If he returns with only half hit points, then his CR is effectively lowered, and is worth less xp.

If he is just harassing the party though, and you don't want them to realize he'll be coming back by foregoing xp for the "encounter" then just divide the xp of the creature up by how many times you think he'll be coming back. If he flees the combat without giving much fight, then the players won't be surprised by the small xp value.

As part of a New Year's resolution, I vowed to create something that might have some value to others. Free stuff can still have value, right?

Since I'm a GM that occasionally likes to write stuff, an adventure to make use of the new Bones miniatures seemed like a good place to start.

The Fall of Fairhaven is a Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Compatible Adventure that uses a fair number of miniatures from the Vampire Pledge level rewards from Reaper Miniatures' recent Kickstarter. Rushing to the aid of a small town that finds itself without defenders in the wake of a natural disaster, players will find their mettle tested against those that think Fairhaven is vulnerable.

You can download it at Heroes' Rest.

The thing about tension, is that it's almost always better if the danger is left to the imagination. If you have other encounters lined up, and you want combat focus to remain on those encounters, then you'll have to introduce the cannibals again in ways that leave their strength and intentions something of a mystery.

-Perhaps they could find tracks of the cannibals, dragging something behind them. You could add to the sense of dread and have a child's doll found in the weeds to the side of the tracks...

-There could be a clearing where there are is a blood pool under a tree that looks like something was tied to it to bleed out.

-Ritual totems could be found at different spots on the island, depicting cannibalistic imagery.

-At night, they could see large fires from afar, then on the next night, they could see them closer. The next night, even closer, with the sounds of drums barely audible over the whistling of the trees.

It should be clear that they're not alone, but the actual threat should remain invisible until the time is right.

Raw magic is woven into the fabric of any in-game reality, a case made no more evident than in the nature of the sorcerer class. So when Inner Sea Magic re-introduced primal (or wild) magic, a form of magic highlighting the often unpredictable and sometimes dangerous nature of raw magic, I was surprised to see it as a wizard archetype instead of a sorcerer bloodline.

Sorcerers currently have both the Arcane Bloodline, which imitates the studious wizardly way to magic (without the actual studying), and the Protean Bloodline, which favors the chaos part of magic. Separately, I don’t feel either of these work quite well enough to depict a sorcerer’s intimate relationship with the world’s raw arcane energies. So here is a reworking of the primal magic archetype just for sorcerers.

_________________________________________________

Primal Magic Bloodline

Your soul emerged from an arcane crucible, putting the mastery of primal magic just within your reach. You can seem distant at times, as you can feel the arcane fibers that are woven through creation, and while others would only dare tap these primal sources after years of study, you readily test your resolve to forge these unbound energies to your will.

Class Skill: Knowledge (planes).

Bonus Spells: identify (3rd), make whole (5th), dispel magic (7th), dimension door (9th), major creation (11th), disintegrate (13th), spell turning (15th), maze (17th), wish (19th).

Bonus Feats: Combat Casting, Improved Counterspell, Improved Initiative, Iron Will, Toughness, Skill Focus (spellcraft), Spell Penetration, Extend Spell.

Bloodline Arcana: Whenever you apply a metamagic feat to a spell that increases the slot used by at least one level, you receive a +2 bonus to any caster level checks to overcome the target’s spell resistance. This bonus does not stack with itself.

Bloodline Powers: You enjoy a more intimate relationship with the arcane, drawing forth magic in its truest form to mold and shape as needed, sometimes with unforeseeable consequences.

Primal Magic (Su): At 1st level, you may attempt to channel primal magic as a full round action to cast any spell on the sorcerer spell list. Essentially, you are forcing primal magic into the world and attempting to shape it into a specific spell effect. To use this ability, you first must expend a spell slot of the appropriate level, then begin to cast the spell as normal. If the spell is not one of the spells on your list of known spells, you must first make a spellcraft check (DC 20 + the spell’s level). If this check is successful, or if the spell is one that you know, you must then make a concentration check (DC 20 + double the spell’s level). If you fail either of these checks, you expend the spell slot anyway, but its actual effects are replaced by a primal magic event with a CR equal to your caster level and you are staggered for 1 round per level of the spell you were attempting to cast. If you make these checks, you cast the spell normally.
You may use primal magic in this manner once per day. At 5th, 10th, 15th, and 20th, you may use this ability an additional time per day.

Guide Primal Magic Event (Su): At 3rd level, any round after you have triggered a primal magic event, and while the effects of the event still persist, you may use a swift action to increase or decrease its CR by 1. If you make a concentration check (DC 15 + the primal magic event’s CR), you can instead increase or decrease the CR by 2. If you reduce a primal magic event’s CR to less than 1, the event is negated.

Primal Surge (Su): At 9th level, whenever you trigger a primal magic event, you roll the percentile dice twice to determine the event that occurs and choose which one of the two possible events occurs.

Primal Paragon (Su): At 15th level, you become resistant to the effects of primal magic events. Anytime an event would affect you, the GM rolls 1d20 + the event’s CR against a DC of 11 + your sorcerer level. If this roll fails, the event does not affect you. This is similar to a creature with spell resistance ignoring magical effects with an SR check. If the primal magic event is duplicating the effects of a spell that does not allow spell resistance (such as create pit), this resistance does not apply.

Primal Lifeblood (Ex): At 20th level, you are one with the arcana of creation. As long as the ageless veins of magic run throughout the world, so too shall you. You take no penalty to your physical ability scores from advanced age. If you are already taking such penalties, they are removed at this time. You will not die as a result of old age, although other means of death will still prove effective.

_________________________________________________

There it is. The only real changes I made were to adapt the primal magic ability as well as add the extra bloodline spells, feats and arcana. I thought quite a while about how to adapt the primal magic ability and figured that if the wizard archetype effectively removed the wizard’s greatest weakness, then uncapping the sorcerer’s biggest weakness is still in line with what the archetype was doing. In any case, the campaign I play in, which I adapted this for, is a high level, highly empowered game where a bloodline like this won’t necessarily be overshadowing anyone.