paizo.com Recent Posts by Ben Affleck, mallard at largepaizo.com Recent Posts by Ben Affleck, mallard at large2015-10-18T20:14:16Z2015-10-18T20:14:16ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Deep 6 FaWtLBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lusz&page=5214?Deep-6-FaWtL#2606822021-03-04T14:49:04Z2021-03-03T22:07:24Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">Limeylongears wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Woran wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Sharoth wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Un-Bear-able Puns wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Sharoth wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Vidmaster7 wrote:</div><blockquote> Sharoth is showing of his Prime realestate. </blockquote>You are right. I do have a "prime" number showing. </blockquote>You know to sum of the problem the longer we keep this going the more exponentially awkward it gets. </blockquote><p>Well,
<p>[Spoiler omitted] </blockquote>So its like a fungus? </blockquote>Or a wart? </blockquote><p>Maybe he has <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barnacle_goose_myth" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">goose barnacles</a>?Limeylongears wrote:Woran wrote: Sharoth wrote: Un-Bear-able Puns wrote: Sharoth wrote: Vidmaster7 wrote: Sharoth is showing of his Prime realestate.
You are right. I do have a "prime" number showing. You know to sum of the problem the longer we keep this going the more exponentially awkward it gets. Well, [Spoiler omitted] So its like a fungus? Or a wart? Maybe he has goose barnacles?Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2021-03-03T22:07:24ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Deep 6 FaWtLBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lusz&page=5032?Deep-6-FaWtL#2515832020-08-26T08:56:25Z2020-08-26T08:56:25Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">Sharoth wrote:</div><blockquote> I love Lego. So do my cats. </blockquote><p>You fool! If you thought it was bad when SkyNet gained sentience, you really don't want to see what happens when cats figure out how to build with Lego.Sharoth wrote:I love Lego. So do my cats.
You fool! If you thought it was bad when SkyNet gained sentience, you really don't want to see what happens when cats figure out how to build with Lego.Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2020-08-26T08:56:25ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Deep 6 FaWtLBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lusz&page=4665?Deep-6-FaWtL#2332022019-10-01T11:31:50Z2019-09-30T23:57:49Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">Matt Daemon wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Ben Affleck, mallard at large wrote:</div><blockquote> I blame Matt Daemon. </blockquote>It wasn't me, I was writing the reboot of Gigli. </blockquote><p><i>Gigli</i> was a misunderstood masterpiece, you vicious hack.
<p><i>Get thee back into the tempest and that late night’s Fallon whore!
<br />
Leave no Bourne plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken!
<br />
Leave my loneliness unbroken! — return to that Martian shore!
<br />
Take thy beak from out my heart, and take them apples from off my door!
<br />
Quoth the Kimmel “I still like Affleck more.”</i></p>Matt Daemon wrote:Ben Affleck, mallard at large wrote: I blame Matt Daemon.
It wasn't me, I was writing the reboot of Gigli. Gigli was a misunderstood masterpiece, you vicious hack. Get thee back into the tempest and that late night’s Fallon whore!
Leave no Bourne plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken!
Leave my loneliness unbroken! — return to that Martian shore!
Take thy beak from out my heart, and take them apples from off my door!
Quoth the Kimmel “I still like Affleck more.”Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2019-09-30T23:57:49ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Deep 6 FaWtLBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lusz&page=4664?Deep-6-FaWtL#2332002019-10-01T11:31:36Z2019-09-30T23:28:06Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">Sparrow Jailbird wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Scintillae wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Woran wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Vanykrye wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Woran wrote:</div><blockquote> <a href="https://www.rtvutrecht.nl/nieuws/1963769/utrechtse-politie-pakt-vogel-op.html" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">In case anyone wants a laugh, my city arrested a bird</a> </blockquote>I love that they edited in the redaction of the bird's face. </blockquote>IT MAKES ME LAUGH EVERY TIME I SEE IT </blockquote>Wow, a literal jailbird. </blockquote>Yerwha? </blockquote><p>I blame Matt Daemon.Sparrow Jailbird wrote:Scintillae wrote: Woran wrote: Vanykrye wrote: Woran wrote: In case anyone wants a laugh, my city arrested a bird
I love that they edited in the redaction of the bird's face. IT MAKES ME LAUGH EVERY TIME I SEE IT Wow, a literal jailbird. Yerwha? I blame Matt Daemon.Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2019-09-30T23:28:06ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Deep 6 FaWtLBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lusz&page=3844?Deep-6-FaWtL#1921892018-05-20T15:47:02Z2018-05-20T15:37:22Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">gran rey de los mono wrote:</div><blockquote> In a way, it's an honor to be stung by a bee. They hate you <i>so</i> much that they are willing to die just to cause you a mild amount of pain. </blockquote><p>This could also arguably apply to all the idiot drivers willing to kill themselves, both accidentally and seemingly deliberately, while trying to inconvenience/irritate you in traffic.
<div class="messageboard-quotee">gran rey de los mono wrote:</div><blockquote> If Stan Lee were to pass away while the MCU was still a thing, they should totally have Deadpool take over doing the cameos. </blockquote><p>Or Matt Damon. <span class=tiny>Two, two cameos so far! AH-AH-AH-AH! {<i>cue cheap thunder & lightning effects</i>}</span>gran rey de los mono wrote:In a way, it's an honor to be stung by a bee. They hate you so much that they are willing to die just to cause you a mild amount of pain.
This could also arguably apply to all the idiot drivers willing to kill themselves, both accidentally and seemingly deliberately, while trying to inconvenience/irritate you in traffic. gran rey de los mono wrote:If Stan Lee were to pass away while the MCU was still a thing, they should totally have Deadpool take over doing the...Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2018-05-20T15:37:22ZRe: Forums: Starfinder General Discussion: Paizo Blog: Introducing Starfinder’s Final Core Race: The Shirren!Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/community/blog/v5748dyo5ljpv&page=3?Introducing-Starfinder-s-Final-Core-Race-The#1452017-04-14T15:22:13Z2017-04-13T11:41:29Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">Owen K. C. Stephens wrote:</div><blockquote> Imagine if we had put fetchlings and tengu in the Pathfinder Core Rulebook. </blockquote><p>I'll instead imagine an all-tengu crew (T-Force?) in a Gatchaman <i>Phoenix</i> ship in <i>Starfinder</i>.Owen K. C. Stephens wrote:Imagine if we had put fetchlings and tengu in the Pathfinder Core Rulebook.
I'll instead imagine an all-tengu crew (T-Force?) in a Gatchaman Phoenix ship in Starfinder.Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2017-04-13T11:41:29ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: The Paizo Office Closure Conspiracy Thread!Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2ty7k&page=2?The-Paizo-Office-Closure-Conspiracy-Thread#882016-10-21T19:20:56Z2016-10-21T19:20:56Z<p>Krump's Krooked Krew only casts the other <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2CCEixOVVU" target="_blank" rel="nofollow"><i>Grease</i></a>. <span class=tiny>Casting Ruddy Ghouliani as Rizzo really ruins it.</span></p>
<p><span class=tiny><span class=messageboard-ooc>Edit: If someone wants to make an undead "Ruddy Ghouliani" parody alias, you're welcome to it. </span></span></p>Krump's Krooked Krew only casts the other Grease. Casting Ruddy Ghouliani as Rizzo really ruins it.
Edit: If someone wants to make an undead "Ruddy Ghouliani" parody alias, you're welcome to it.Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-10-21T19:20:56ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Deep 6 FaWtLBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lusz&page=2961?Deep-6-FaWtL#1480162016-10-17T14:55:57Z2016-10-17T14:28:12Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">captain yesterday wrote:</div><blockquote> I used to think i had great success corrupting ducks, but it turns out they're a&~+$$•s naturally. :-) </blockquote><p><span class=tiny>{<i>whispers:</i>} Matt Damon is actually a goose with really good plastic surgery.</span>captain yesterday wrote:I used to think i had great success corrupting ducks, but it turns out they're a&~+$$*s naturally. :-)
{whispers:} Matt Damon is actually a goose with really good plastic surgery.Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-10-17T14:28:12ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Deep 6 FaWtLBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lusz&page=2894?Deep-6-FaWtL#1446912016-07-28T12:47:12Z2016-07-28T01:16:42Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">King Yesterday of Pillowpia wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">NobodysHome wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">captain yesterday wrote:</div><blockquote><p> Oh, I don't open my mail.</p>
<p>Too many bills. :-) </blockquote>It's the male ducks. They're after you... </blockquote><p><span class=messageboard-ooc>Puts fake lipstick covered duck Bill on vacuum cleaner, hooks it up to outlet on a motion sensor, puts it in front of the main gate to the Pillow Fort.</span>
<p>Oh I'll be ready, those a&%$&%•s aren't making it past my countermeasures. </blockquote><p>I'm surprised more male ducks aren't sommeliers.
<p>{<i>waggles nonexistent eyebrows at vacuum</i>} Hello Ms. Dyson, with the proper-amount-of-suction... How you doin'?</p>King Yesterday of Pillowpia wrote:NobodysHome wrote: captain yesterday wrote:Oh, I don't open my mail.
Too many bills. :-)
It's the male ducks. They're after you... Puts fake lipstick covered duck Bill on vacuum cleaner, hooks it up to outlet on a motion sensor, puts it in front of the main gate to the Pillow Fort. Oh I'll be ready, those a&%$&%*s aren't making it past my countermeasures. I'm surprised more male ducks aren't sommeliers. {waggles nonexistent eyebrows at vacuum} Hello Ms....Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-07-28T01:16:42ZRe: Forums: Forum Games: Last one to post winsBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lt9f&page=385?Last-one-to-post-wins#192432016-06-09T18:01:43Z2016-06-09T18:01:43Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">"THE" Poog of Zarongel wrote:</div><blockquote><p> Bird!</p>
<p>(Jumps onto and shanks the duck/seagul) </blockquote><p>NOOOOOOOOOOO!"THE" Poog of Zarongel wrote:Bird!
(Jumps onto and shanks the duck/seagul)
NOOOOOOOOOOO!Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-06-09T18:01:43ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Deep 6 FaWtLBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lusz&page=2812?Deep-6-FaWtL#1405562016-05-01T18:23:05Z2016-05-01T06:05:36Z<p>AFFLECK!</p>AFFLECK!Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-05-01T06:05:36ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: The Slaad ThreadBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2jm0b&page=127?The-Slaad-Thread#63492016-04-28T17:36:38Z2016-04-28T17:36:38Z<p>Quack?</p>Quack?Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-04-28T17:36:38ZRe: Forums/Lost Omens Campaign Setting: General Discussion: What's in a name?: Paizo naming disastersBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2tl64&page=2?Whats-in-a-name-Paizo-naming-disasters#902016-04-13T13:16:42Z2016-04-11T03:13:39Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">Tangent101 wrote:</div><blockquote> The sad thing is these same people would be complaining if various NPCs were named John or Bob or Jane. You know, easily-pronounced names. </blockquote><p>So... <i>Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure</i> ends in a shocking twist when they are chunky-salsa'ed by a pack of adventuring murderhobos?
<p>Or is this more a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kerUbfOQTW0" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">Sam and Ralph</a> set up?</p>
<div class="messageboard-quotee">bugleyman wrote:</div><blockquote>...There is nothing "sad" here. This is not <a href="http://cdn.bols.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/resized_business-cat-meme-generator-seriously-folks-this-is-serious-business-d31d3d.jpg" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">SERIOUS BUSINESS(tm)</a>.</blockquote><p>Speak for yourself: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KwxwUiDbRCk" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">This. is. sewious.</a>Tangent101 wrote:The sad thing is these same people would be complaining if various NPCs were named John or Bob or Jane. You know, easily-pronounced names.
So... Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure ends in a shocking twist when they are chunky-salsa'ed by a pack of adventuring murderhobos? Or is this more a Sam and Ralph set up?
bugleyman wrote:...There is nothing "sad" here. This is not SERIOUS BUSINESS(tm).
Speak for yourself: This. is. sewious.Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-04-11T03:13:39ZRe: Forums: Movies: Dawn of Justice Trailer LeakedBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2s6v0&page=7?Dawn-of-Justice-Trailer-Leaked#3202016-03-29T19:19:52Z2016-03-27T08:17:30Z<p>I haven't seen the movie, but I did enjoy <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cwXfv25xJUw" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">this Batffleck video</a>.</p>I haven't seen the movie, but I did enjoy this Batffleck video.Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-03-27T08:17:30ZRe: Forums: Product Discussion: Paizo Blog: The Most Intriguing ClassesBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/community/blog/v5748dyo5likr&page=3?The-Most-Intriguing-Classes#1322016-03-23T18:50:16Z2016-03-12T01:01:26Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">zergtitan wrote:</div><blockquote><p> •looks at Vizier picture•</p>
<p>It's Jafar!</p>
<p>Where's the parrot? </blockquote><p>Jafar is the crimefightin' costumed supermurderhobo identity... of Iago, the mild-mannered wise-crackering parrot.zergtitan wrote:*looks at Vizier picture*
It's Jafar!
Where's the parrot?
Jafar is the crimefightin' costumed supermurderhobo identity... of Iago, the mild-mannered wise-crackering parrot.Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-03-12T01:01:26ZRe: Forums/Gamer Life: General Discussion: So, In The Interest Of Fairness....Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2tchm?So-In-The-Interest-Of-Fairness#202016-02-15T22:08:21Z2016-02-15T22:08:21Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">DungeonmasterCal wrote:</div><blockquote> <div class="messageboard-quotee">Hama wrote:</div><blockquote> What I hate is when a player insists about playing a beastly race, I warn him/her that the character would be singled out and subjected to bigotry. And they say ok. And then they get angry when they get singled out and subjected to bigotry. </blockquote>I know exactly how you feel. But like I'd said earlier, this guy changes characters so often your head will spin. He emailed me earlier to tell me that he'd rolled up the Tengu then decided to scrap it in favor of a Dwarven Inquisitor after we'd come up with a good backstory and everything! AAAGGGHHH!!!! </blockquote><p>Maybe the PC can be a dwarf that <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birdman_%28film%29" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">channels a tengu</a>? <span class=tiny>(possible 2014 movie spoilers)</span>DungeonmasterCal wrote:Hama wrote: What I hate is when a player insists about playing a beastly race, I warn him/her that the character would be singled out and subjected to bigotry. And they say ok. And then they get angry when they get singled out and subjected to bigotry.
I know exactly how you feel. But like I'd said earlier, this guy changes characters so often your head will spin. He emailed me earlier to tell me that he'd rolled up the Tengu then decided to scrap it in favor of a...Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-02-15T22:08:21ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Kobbold Cleaver has Jumped the SharkBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2tbbu?Kobbold-Cleaver-has-Jumped-the-Shark#412016-02-12T08:47:58Z2016-02-12T08:47:58Z<p>Ah, another KC-related thread... for me to poop on!</p>Ah, another KC-related thread... for me to poop on!Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-02-12T08:47:58ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Deep 6 FaWtLBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2lusz&page=2717?Deep-6-FaWtL#1358012016-02-01T15:16:52Z2016-02-01T01:03:02Z<div class="messageboard-quotee">Sharoth wrote:</div><blockquote>Actually, the fracking does not do as much damage as putting the waste water BACK in the ground and causing all of those old faults to lubricated and slide easier, thus causing earthquakes. </blockquote><p>{<i>uses Crane Style to deflect possible political discussion, saving everyone from flaming bikes</i>} Aww jiss, baby. Lube your cracks, gonna slip & slide against each other, then we'll feel the earth shake. Gonna frack you good and slow.
<p>Edit: Nekkid innuendo?</p>
<p>Edit 2: Nekkid inyourendo?</p>Sharoth wrote:Actually, the fracking does not do as much damage as putting the waste water BACK in the ground and causing all of those old faults to lubricated and slide easier, thus causing earthquakes.
{uses Crane Style to deflect possible political discussion, saving everyone from flaming bikes} Aww jiss, baby. Lube your cracks, gonna slip & slide against each other, then we'll feel the earth shake. Gonna frack you good and slow. Edit: Nekkid innuendo?
Edit 2: Nekkid inyourendo?Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2016-02-01T01:03:02ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: The Core ThreadBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2t1oz?The-Core-Thread#202015-10-30T12:23:50Z2015-10-30T11:56:38Z<p>AFFLECK!</p>AFFLECK!Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2015-10-30T11:56:38ZRe: Forums: Off-Topic Discussions: Peck Peck PeckBen Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)https://paizo.com/threads/rzs2kkht&page=20?Peck-Peck-Peck#9922015-10-18T20:15:06Z2015-10-18T20:15:06Z<p>AFFLECK!!!</p>AFFLECK!!!Ben Affleck, mallard at large (alias of Ambrosia Slaad)2015-10-18T20:15:06Z