The curtain rises. The set evokes somewhere deep within the dimly-lit-yet-safe-and-sanitary Paizo warehouse. Tall, industrial metal shelves full of pallets and cardboard boxes reach to the high ceiling above with wide corridors stretching to infinity. Some boxes are half open. Perhaps there’s a discarded mask or two on the floor and a forklift partially visible. The time of day is uncertain in the artificial light. The sound of an athletic, yet not truly violent, scuffle is heard from offstage or as a sound cue. With a flash, a small red reptilian figure with a slender, yet well-fed body and long tail appears out of a yellow cloud, smelling of rotten eggs. Enter Boldo.
We meet again my worthy adversary; ‘tis I, Boldo, the Great and Powerful, Descendant of Dragons, Prince of the Kobolds Under the Warehouse, Warehouse Raptor Bane! I see you have discovered one of our secret hoards and are making off with our loot. Well, I am here to tell you your days of plundering our plunder are short, though you are tall. I am confident my forces will retake our ill-gotten gains soon. The power of Creamy Chicken flavored ramen compels us, and we shall overcome you! We are regrouping to hide the treasures again. Soon, you may no longer find ENTIRE DISPLAY SETS OF PATHFINDER BATTLES FROM WIZKIDS AND TOY VAULT PLUSHIES!
Ahem, please excuse me to shouting, I promised myself I would not get overexcited and start monologuing. And yet, here we are.
Meet us on the battlefield and see what you can acquire, you Tools of Abadar!
Exit Boldo in a flash of light and smoke. A maniacal laugh is heard from offstage or as a sound cue as the curtain descends.
Last Chance for the Kobold Hoard!
Monday, March 21, 2022