Let us prepare and perhaps make sure Borgan's teeth are at their height of poachability so the knaves will find them irresistible
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Well thought out. Borgan, if I may see your teeth for a minute? Variel then casts a small cantrip cleaning the teeth and making them smell minty fresh and pearly white for the next hour. Then as an added bonus he casts dancing lights in his mouth as well. There all spruced up and ready for any would be canine theives.
""If even Shelyen doubts her silver tongue then who am I to command the tide?"
"Hey, I didn't say I couldn't convince 'em to let us in," Litsy retorts. "I just wanted to point out that it could be hella hard. Unless someone wants to pretend they're here to give the body its last rites, or... Does someone actually examine someone's wounds after they die and before they're tossed in a pit?"
""If even Shelyen doubts her silver tongue then who am I to command the tide?""Hey, I didn't say I couldn't convince 'em to let us in," Litsy retorts. "I just wanted to point out that it could be hella hard. Unless someone wants to pretend they're here to give the body its last rites, or... Does someone actually examine someone's wounds after they die and before they're tossed in a pit?"
"Voyeurs, medical students, necromancers, gleeful heirs, the idle rich, tax agents, murderers looking for professional tips, or I suppose people attempting to discover how and why someone died. In more civilized cities the fees are usually quite reasonable. Sometimes they even let you take bits home."
"Yes, Castor agrees we should do things because they are easy, not because they are hard. I am of two minds on the subject but that could be because of the moon."
"So are we away to the house of flattened beer or are we to follow Shelyn and race the pyre for the toothless dead? Pity we can not lay hands on a decent necromancer and a good pair of dentures. We could just ask her ourselves."
Borgan nods to Variel, "I am no sleuth or medical examiner, I have some knowledge about wounds, but only on a superficial level. So this plan is the best I could come up with to try and find out what kind of assailants we are dealing with."
Borgan opens up his mouth and notices his tusks and canines looking far more pearly white than he ever remembered them to be.
"Looks odd to me, but let's just hope any would be dental thieves think of it a worthy prize."
He glances at Pollux with a sad determination. "I am sorry about your plan. Hopefully I will not rue my decision afterwards. Let's just hope we can catch whatever these murderers are."
"Shall we head to the tavern first? Make sure it is safe, then hit the streets? Or shall I just patrol down the streets?"
"To the tavern! We must be sure the ruin can collapse in peace."
Pollux looks to Borgan to lead as the stranger has forgotten which way leads to the Izakaya.
The tavern itself is exactly as described. Dilapidated and mostly collapsed you stop some yards away presumably out of sight of any would be dental burglar to plan your approach. The tavern sits on the corner of a block with several other residential buildings, though their inhabitants are either elsewhere or otherwise preoccupied. Behind the tavern is a dirt yard presumably a place for people to bring in supplies or leave their horses while they attend to the offerings of the tavern.
Hmm...We should check the grounds. Perhaps their is a dropped tooth or two about.
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Arriving at the tavern Variel does what Beorn suggests and goes about searching for any signs of fallen teeth or drops of blood that may indicate they are in the right spot.
Perception
However the decrepit building alarms him as he sees nothing of interest. Yeah Beorn there hasn’t been a tooth here for years outside of ours right now. Heck, a tooth placed in the wrong spot might make this whole place collapse. This place has to be crawling in vermin and you might get tetanus just from looking at it too hard.
Hmm..I guess I was mistaken.
Taking her distance from the group's distracting bickering, Litsy inspects the remains of the building for any clues that might linken it to the crime scene.
Or, at the very least, some stuff to scavenge.
"Souls of Poets dead and gone,
What Elysium have ye known,
Happy field or mossy cavern,
Choicer than the Mermaid Tavern?
Have ye tippled drink more fine
Than mine host's Canary wine?
Or are fruits of Paradise
Sweeter than those dainty pies
Of venison? O generous food!
Drest as though bold Robin Hood
Would, with his maid Marian,
Sup and bowse from horn and can."
Pollux mutters something about poets and cans under their breath.
If/As we enter the yard:
"...crawling in vermin...tetanus..."
Pollux sighs deeply. "We have found our new home Castor. Is it not lovely?"
"..."
"Yes it lacks some creature comforts in the roof and walls departments but the rent will surely be cheaper and you can't beat the view."
With this the stranger joins in the general inspection.
For now I'm assuming youre just down the street coming from the south and approaching the front.
Castor and litsy notice the same thing; a collapsed bolthole from which small creatures can easily enter and exit from. Though the agitation that Castor gives you suggests the hole is occupied.
Pollux's head tilts nearly horizontal as they speak quietly
"Air has no Residence, no Neighbor,
No Ear, no Door,
No Apprehension of Another
Oh, Happy Air!"
"We however are not air. Pity. It appears we have neighbors. Castor does not think they are his friends and relations not that it would matter as they are surprisingly easy to replace. Perhaps we should pay them a friendly social call."
Pollux readies their crossbow.
Beorn keeps a hand on his blade. Perhaps more of those snot rats that Litsy is so wary of.
"Oh, you go first then," Litsy loads her handcrossbow and takes a step back.
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Variel will take Litsy up on the offer and step up to the bolt hole after casting shield on himself. Not sure what may be in here. I am hoping it is not any more of those puking flying opossums. I never want to experience those again. He turns to look at the newest member of the group. Be thankful you weren't with us then. Imagine Castor naked, flying and then throwing up on you...you get the idea.
Pollux moves in Variel's shadow. Keeping 25' away from Variel on a line from the bolthole.
...throwing up on you...
Oh like last week then. I told you about the spiders right?
Pollux looks at the their crossbow. Sees that it is unloaded. Considers this a biting comment on the dire BAB issue plaguing full casters. Realizes despite their alignment they are not a troll and they have no idea what they are thinking about. Loads crossbow.
Castor is nowhere to be seen.
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Uh, yeah you did but I didn’t recall that it was upon you. You know…never mind. Let’s just forget this whole conversation happened before I get sick myself thinking about it. Some smells don’t bother me but that retching sound makes me cringe. Variel’s complexion has gone slightly paler at the talk and he clears his throat to concentrate on the bolt hole before them.
Waiting to see how Borgan wants to play this out since he originally gave himself as tribute.
As the group nears the tavern, Borgan looks around a bit distracted, letting the others look around as much as they want.
"So... Castor thinks there might be some occupants already here, does he? I guess we will have to find out if we are lucky or unlucky, if they turn out to be our teeth-thieves."
Borgan moves forward to the front and clasps a hand on Variel's shoulder.
"It was my idea to be a lure, so that would mean that you need not go in first. Allow me to go in first, you just watch my back, okay?"
The bolt hole is small and it doesnt seem that trying to widen it would do much more thwn create a mess. Borgan might manage to squeeze through but it would leave him dangeroualy exposed to what , if anything, lies within.
As or if Borgan takes the lead Pollux slips into position 25 feet behind him.
Borgan will attempt to squeeze into the tavern through the bolthole, hoping his armour doesn't get too much in the way.
First he will stick his head in there to see if there is anything he could distinguish.
Borgan will moves his arms and head through first, then followed by his torso and the rest.
Beorn watches Borgan fail to get his shoulders in. I seems that we are all to big to get through. He strokes his beard. I fear I am rather bulky myself
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Doing family things but when i get back today ill steal borgans face.
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Beorn watches Borgan fail to get his shoulders in. I seems that we are all to big to get through. He strokes his beard. I fear I am rather bulky myself
The sneak specialist looks up at Beorn, and quietly wonders if the group hasn't collectively left their common sense at home before deciding to squeeze the paladin down a tiny, probably pest - infested hole where he's very likely to stay stuck.
If he gets stuck, she reasons, there's no way her tiny bird arms are going to be able to drag him out.
.... steal borgan's face.
As the group considers the hole and it's contents they discuss past experiences with small angry vermin capable of doing some harm in dusgusting ways. Proving that the group is either prophetic or simply that fate has a sense of humor as Borgan bends down over the hole to let his darkness accustomed eyes a chance to see what's inside the hole explodes into a flurry of activity as near a dozen of insect winged creatures barely the size of a human fist fly out from their lair. Issuing a tiny battle cry each carry a twisted and strong pair of pliers and going straight for Borgan's face and the bounty that lay within.
Initiatives please.
Map is here need pollux post in the chat so I can attach his token to his soul.
"Blasted cretins! Seems we've got our thieves alright!"
Zounds! Some infernal imps seek to purloin our teeth!
Doesn't sound good," Litsy thinks as tiny, piercing shrieks start coming out from the hole.
Good Guys: 10.6
Teeth Guys:
Total: 11.8
The group stand in shock as Borgan's face is swarmed by screeching plier wielding creatures. They attempt right away to jump on his face and pry his mouth open using their pliers to grasp onto and rip out their prize.
CMB to STEAL
CMB to STEAL
CMB to STEAL
CMB to STEAL
CMB to STEAL
CMB to STEAL
CMB to STEAL
CMB to STEAL
The creatures chant in unison as they descend upon their hapless prey a manic glee infecting them as they clamp their pliers in anticipation.
Their sheer numbers overwhelm Borgan and as he reaches up to grab one another takes its place and before long four of them giggle in delight as they grab on to a choice tooth and rip it cleanly from his jaws. By the time the rest of the group can rouse themselves Borgans face is a mess of blood and pain filled tears.
Group is up!
Pollux should have token control now.
Same as I always have. Initiatives are averaged out to see which group goes first and post order determines initiative order within those groups to keep things clean for me.
Same as I always have. Initiatives are averaged out to see which group goes first and post order determines initiative order within those groups to keep things clean for me.
Pliers...they have pliers?! Pollux begins to giggle but soon the laughter gains a manic edge as one of the flying dentists experiences a wave of existential nausea.
Beorn dashes forwards and attempts to strike down the nearest creature.
Borgan tries to swat away the flying critters, but can't stop them from stealing his teeth, losing both his tusks, a premolar on his left lower jaw and an incisor on his right, he manages to tear away his mouth from the rest and then grits his remaining teeth to get through the pain.
He puts a hand to his jaw and channels the divine light of Shelyn to at least stop the bleeding.
Borgan drops his shield and mace, then slides the glaive from his back-strap as he takes a step back from the flying critters.
"Alright... You better stay away now." Borgan hacks away at one of the furthest creatures that harassed him.
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VAriel watches 4 teeth come flying out of the mouth of Borgan. Thankful that it was Borgan and not himself he still felt bad for his companion. To that end he tried to take out the teeth stealers with magic and blade.
swift action to imbue weapon
spell combat with spellstrike
shocking grasp for
scimitar strike for
Unfortunate for Borgan Variel was not too adept yet at trying to attack simultaneously with spell and blade as both attacks are wide of their mark. At least the spell was still active on his blade though. HE then steps back a pace to give some room for any spell that Pollux may have cast.
Litsy moves closer so she can get a clear shot at one of the creatures, but unfortunately the bolt misses its mark entirely. Apparently, she had not noticed that the little monster was flying, because she aimed way too low.
"Aw, f~~~."
Beorn rushes forward and waveshis sword somewhat ineffectually into the tiny horde his inabilty to single out an individual hampering his ability to respond. Borgan proves a credit to his chocen path and with grit backs up and slices through the air catching one of the creatures unaware. Instead of the satisfying crunch or slap of a small body against steel the creature instead explodes comically into a shower of glittery dust that invades the nostrils of those closest. It is far from a pleasant sensation.
With such a bounty before them the Fairies giggle in delight barely noticing the sudden demise of one of their number. They divide their attentions swarming each of you in turn.
Seeing the danger inherent in Borgan's resistance two of the fairies elect to take his teeth at a more leasiurely place and instead try to sink their crooked dirty teeth into his exposed flesh.
BITE
BITE
Variel's terrifying swings alarm the creatures enough that two have decided to rob him of the use of his hands clamping pliers upon his fingers causing a great deal of pain and surgically pinching nerves that reduce the feeling that all swordsman rely on. Thankfully the quick handed Variel shows his proper discipline and doesn't expose his vulnerable hand longer than it takes to make a flashing strike evading their attempts at stealing his fingers.
PINCH ON YOUR CMD
PINCH ON YOUR CMD
Beorn was by far the unluckiest as the greediest fairies went straight his face and the prized face that were a hallmark of the actor's blossoming career. In an instant his life on the stage flashes before his eyes as the awful clamping begins.
GIMME YOUR TEETH!!!
GIMME YOUR TEETH!!!
With a sickening squelch the two faeries ram themselves into his mouth and come screeching away with their prize leaving beorn in a sudden existential agony.
The final fairy looks around indecisively trying to decide what flavor of torment to inflict on who before an arrow whizzes by him and with a noise somewhere between a cackle, a screech, and a battlecry it unleashes its sorcerous abilities upon Pollux and Litsy as they feel a sudden urge to take a nap and let the big men handle the murderous creatures.
Litsy feels herself becoming slightly lethargic, in spite of all the screaming and the cackling and the grown men with blood running down their chins...
With a cry of frustration, she slaps herself across the face with her free hand, shaking off the drowsiness.
"These b~!*~es use f&$!ing magic?! Great! Just great!"