The Journey of a Thousand Miles (Jade Regent AP)

Game Master Sensen

Current Chapter: The Hungry Storm
Wherein the caravan traverses a Crown, and the heroes discover Utmost North.
Date: Oathday, 14th Kuthona (XII) 4711 AR
Time of Day: Early Evening
Season: Late Autumn
Weather: 26° F (-3° C), Light Clouds

Current Supplies: 1 week, 5 days remaining

4711 AR Calendar
Crown of the World


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HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'

”Let me scout this, Chief. Give me 30’.” With that Ritti catfoots down the stairs.

Stealth: 1d20 + 21 ⇒ (11) + 21 = 32
Perception: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (6) + 12 = 18
I’ve got Trap Spotter, so PER +14 to auto detect a trap.


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

"Do-don't make anything too re-reckless, ok?" Yuto follows Ritti not too far away, enough so he can charge over any danger jumping on her.

Meanwhile, he holds Suishen up, providing light to the party with the blade's flames.


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Ritti descends into the dimly lit under basement, and immediately spots something - a tripwire lying in wait. She can't identify where it ties to, but suspects that it must be an alarm of some sort.

GM Rolls:

1d20 + 8 ⇒ (6) + 8 = 14

Around the corner, Ritti sees an opening some thirty feet down the passageway, but beyond that is too dark even for her own keen senses to perceive.


HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'

Ritti tut tuts at the trip-wire. ”Someone is being naughty.” She delicately presses fine chocks in the holes where the wire disappears into the wall. With the wires held firmly in place, she then clips the wire on the stair rendering it useless. In case he isn’t close enough to see it, the thief silently indicates to Yuto where the trap is before proceeding around the corner even more cautiously.

Disable Device (Traps): 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (16) + 20 = 36
Stealth: 1d20 + 21 ⇒ (20) + 21 = 41
Perception: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (18) + 12 = 30

Status:
HP: 33 / 35 | AC:25 / T:20 / FF:25 | CMD:26/26 (28 Grapple) – AC +4
Stunning Fist (3):
Boots (1):
Shozoku (1):
Inspired (1):
Arrows (20): xxxx
Shuriken (5):
Shuriken Earthfire (3):

Effects:
Mage Armor – 1 hr


Female Human Bard 6 / Oracle 1 | HP: 59/59 | AC: 20 (T: 14, F: 15) | CMB: +6, CMD: 19 | F: +6, R +9, W: +6 | Init: +3| Perc: +7, SM: +14 | Speed 30' | Performance: 20/20

Aksuko follows along with the main group, some small distance behind Ritti and Yuto.


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

Yuto bites his nails nervously as he sees Ritti halting to work on something. Only when she moves forward, he follows "I-It seems Ritti has fi-fixed something ahead. Let's tr-ry not to break it..."

The Tian will carefully avoid stepping on the tile Ritti avoided to step, and looks in tension forward as Ritti gets an advance.


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Ritti easily disables the trap, ensuring that whatever it is that's supposed to happen when the tripwire's broken doesn't. You could've just stepped over it pretty easily, but this works too!

Once she is done, Ritti ghosts forwards, a silent wraith in the dim light cast around the corner by Yuto's sword - and another dim light coming from around the corner. The hallway widens into a small chamber with a doorway to the south, whose door is banded with wide straps of iron and bears a heavy, obvious lock. A single brazier burns in the center of the room, casting it in dancing shadows.

There are, unfortunately, inhabitants there. Most of them are corpses in various stages of decay - of course, these corpses are fully upright, and there is no indication they are going to fall any time soon. More troublingly, there is a green-skinned person seated on a cloak and warming his hands over the fire.


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HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'
Aganhei wrote:
You could've just stepped over it pretty easily, but this works too!

No way! I’m trying to bring the sexy back to disabling devices!

Ritti creeps back to the team to report. ”Got an alcove ahead on the left. There’s a green fella who doesn’t like the cold and about a half dozen dead guys who don’t seem to mind it. The dead guys are standing… So, I’m thinkin’ maybe that was the green fella’s bedroom we were in before and he’s got more friends with him now. How do’ya want to play it?”


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

Yuto listens attentively to Ritti's description, and though he shivers at the mention of the undead, he has seen enough by now to not be too impressed "Let's just t-tell them to release Ulf Gormundr. If they say no, then..., well w-we fight them like the other ones."


She/they Dwarf Kineticist 7 | HP 81/81 (14 NL) | AC 18/13/15| DR 3/adamantine | F +12 R +9 W +7 | CMB +4; CMD 17 | Init +3 | Speed 20 ft. | Perception +18; Darkvision 60' | Sanity: 36/36, Threshold 2, Edge 18

Torra nods at Yuto's suggestion, preparing to follow the others. The dwarf looks a little despondent as she drags her feet down the damp corridors.


Female Human Bard 6 / Oracle 1 | HP: 59/59 | AC: 20 (T: 14, F: 15) | CMB: +6, CMD: 19 | F: +6, R +9, W: +6 | Init: +3| Perc: +7, SM: +14 | Speed 30' | Performance: 20/20

Atsuko braces herself for more violence, jaw clenched.


M Unbuffed stats: Hp 60/60, AC 23/FF22/T12. Saves: F+11 Ref +8, W+7 (+2 vs charm/comp. Att +11, 1d10+8(18-20/x2). SA +3d6. Reach 10 ft, AoO 3/turn. CMB +11, CMD 23 Perc. +20, heal +22, Init +4. Sanity: 38, Thresh. 16, edge 19. Cond.: non Current extra buffs: Mutagen (str), Barkskin (+5ac and FF AC, +4 str > +2 att, +3 dmg, 3 CMB and +2 CMD).

Sensing the imminent violence once again, Andochtuir drinks an extract of shield to prepare him for the storm ahead. He really did not like the undead, not with the diseases they tended to carry. At least with them, there was a modicum of realism involved in that rotting corpses were indeed very potent breeding grounds for infections.

Adding in shield , Andy's ac becomes 29 for 5 minutes.


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

Nodding as there seems to be agreement, Yuto walks the corridor forward until he spots sight of the green man "Re-release Ulf Gormundr" the Tian looks nervously at the undead in the room "Or... or things will be-become messy..."

HP 58-5/58-5 AC 23 TAC 14 (+2 vs evil)
3 Con damage
air walk 200 min
lesser protective aura
defending weapon (+2 AC)


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As soon as Yuto turns the corner, the corpses turn as one to face him, revealing themselves as zombified Ulfen warriors, each one ready to attack! Behind him, Andochtuir drinks another magical extract, summoning a shield of invisible force before him.

Combat Start

Initiatives:

Torra: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (17) + 3 = 20
Yuto: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 2 = 20
Andochtuir: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (2) + 4 = 6
Ritti: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (3) + 5 = 8
Atsuko: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (14) + 5 = 19

Zombies: 1d20 ⇒ 11
???: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5

Round 1 Start

Initiative Order is Yuto, Torra, Atsuko, zombies, Ritti, Andochtuir, green guy.

Statuses:

Yuto: HP 53/53, AC 21, touch 12, flat-footed 19, CMD 19, resolve 3/3, challenge 2/2, honor in all things 1/1, Helgarval’s protective aura, 3 Con damage (10 max HP), air walk 3 hours, 18 minutes
Torra: HP 69/70 (NL 12/69), AC 17, touch 13, flat-footed 14, CMD 12, DR 4/adamantine, Burn 2
Andochtuir: HP 52/52, AC 27, touch 10, flat-footed 25, CMD 22, strength mutagen 45 minutes, see invisibility 45 minutes, barkskin 45 minutes, deafened 59 minutes, enlarge person 5 minutes, shield 5 minutes
Ritti: HP 33/35 (3/33 nonlethal), AC 25, touch 20, Flat-Footed 25, CMD 26, mage armor 57 minutes
Atsuko: HP 51/51, AC 20, touch 14, flat-footed 15, CMD 18, bardic performance 10/13


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

As the zombies lean toward scrapping Ritti, Yuto advances himself with a step, trying to stop it before it can reach her "W-we will do the hard way!"
Suishen-CE: 1d20 + 13 - 2 ⇒ (14) + 13 - 2 = 25
Slashing damage+flaming: 1d8 + 7 + 1d6 ⇒ (1) + 7 + (6) = 14

Suishen-CE: 1d20 + 8 - 2 ⇒ (16) + 8 - 2 = 22
Slashing damage+flaming: 1d8 + 7 + 1d6 ⇒ (1) + 7 + (4) = 12

Suishen's flames flash in the room as he swings to left and right to keep the zombies away.
Bodyguard AoO to protect adjacent attacked allies: 1d20 + 13 - 2 ⇒ (6) + 13 - 2 = 17
AC of guarded ally improves by +3 AC thanks to Yojimbo's intercept

HP 58-5/58-5 AC 23 TAC 14 (+2 vs evil)
3 Con damage
air walk 200 min
lesser protective aura
combat expertise (+2 AC)


She/they Dwarf Kineticist 7 | HP 81/81 (14 NL) | AC 18/13/15| DR 3/adamantine | F +12 R +9 W +7 | CMB +4; CMD 17 | Init +3 | Speed 20 ft. | Perception +18; Darkvision 60' | Sanity: 36/36, Threshold 2, Edge 18

"Few undead listen to reason, unfortunately," sighs Torra as they blast the one standing against the far wall.

Attack yellow: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (4) + 8 = 12 Damage: 3d6 + 10 ⇒ (1, 1, 2) + 10 = 14


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Female Human Bard 6 / Oracle 1 | HP: 59/59 | AC: 20 (T: 14, F: 15) | CMB: +6, CMD: 19 | F: +6, R +9, W: +6 | Init: +3| Perc: +7, SM: +14 | Speed 30' | Performance: 20/20

Atsuko begins a tale she learned a few years back to bolster her comrades' resolve in the fight. It tells of three Ulfen warriors who successfully defended a river crossing for three days and nights against the undead, ice trolls, and evil fey of Baba Yaga's Irrisen when they raided Trollheim in force many years ago.

Starting Inspire Courage: An affected ally receives a +2 morale bonus on saving throws against charm and fear effects and a +2 competence bonus on attack and weapon damage rolls.


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Round 1 Midpoint

Yuto immediately steps forwards, laying about him with Suishen. The zombie before him falls to pieces as the scent of burning rotten flesh fills the air.

Torra advances, hurling a blast of stone at another of the zombies, exploding the skull in a shower of flesh, scalp, bone, and brain.

Atsuko begins a rousing tale of noble Ulfen warriors - even as they put down zombified mockeries thereof.

Said mockeries stumble towards the heroes, limbs flailing. One lined in black lashes out fruitlessly at Yuto, who doesn't even need to dodge or block the attack.
Slam vs. Yuto: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (3) + 4 = 7

The rest of the zombies flop forwards with slow, unsteady steps.

Ritti and Andochtuir are up.

Statuses:

Yuto: HP 53/53, AC 21, touch 12, flat-footed 19, CMD 19, resolve 3/3, challenge 2/2, honor in all things 1/1, Helgarval’s protective aura, 3 Con damage (10 max HP), air walk 3 hours, 18 minutes
Torra: HP 69/70 (NL 12/69), AC 17, touch 13, flat-footed 14, CMD 12, DR 4/adamantine, Burn 2
Andochtuir: HP 52/52, AC 27, touch 10, flat-footed 25, CMD 22, strength mutagen 45 minutes, see invisibility 45 minutes, barkskin 45 minutes, deafened 59 minutes, enlarge person 5 minutes, shield 5 minutes
Ritti: HP 33/35 (3/33 nonlethal), AC 25, touch 20, Flat-Footed 25, CMD 26, mage armor 57 minutes
Atsuko: HP 51/51, AC 20, touch 14, flat-footed 15, CMD 18, bardic performance 9/13
All Save Andochtuir: Inspire Courage


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HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'

Ritti is initially confused as Yuto steps in front of her. What the f…

It dawns on her that the samurai is being protective… which is kind of sweet. That said, as the team tears through the zombies without effort, playing the swooning princess just isn’t her style... and Atsuko's song fills her with confidence. The zombies don’t seem tough or fast but the green fella is an unknown. Maybe he’s just a guard, or maybe he’s the real threat – and there is only one way to know for sure.

Gambling on her speed and skill, Ritti dances between her allies and tumbles through the array of zombies until she rolls up next to the green man. She delivers a staggering flat-punch to his sternum, trying to stop his heart, if he has one.

MOVE: Acro more than ½ speed (on map)
STAND: Punch Mr. Green

BOOM:

Acrobatics vs Zombie CMD+16: 1d20 + 16 ⇒ (16) + 16 = 32 Moving more than ½ speed, and passing through BLUE, RED, and WHITE’s AoO ranges. With Mobility, if they get AoOs, my AC is 29.

STAND: Unarmed Strike (crit: 20/2x | B)
Mods: Sneak Attack + Debilitating Injury (since he is Flat-Footed), Inspire
HIT: 1d20 + 10 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 10 + 2 = 32 | DAM: 1d6 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (4) + 5 + 2 = 11 + Sneak DAM: 3d6 ⇒ (5, 1, 5) = 11 Crit?
CONFIRM: 1d20 + 10 + 2 ⇒ (15) + 10 + 2 = 27 | DAM: 1d6 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 5 + 2 = 13

DI: Disorient - Sneak DAM’d foe takes -2 HIT (-4 for Ritti) for 1 rnd

Status:
HP: 33 / 35 | AC:25 / T:20 / FF:25 | CMD:26/26 (28 Grapple) – AC +4
Stunning Fist (3):
Boots (1):
Shozoku (1):
Inspired (1):
Arrows (20): xxxx
Shuriken (5):
Shuriken Earthfire (3):

Effects:
Mage Armor – 1 hr


M Unbuffed stats: Hp 60/60, AC 23/FF22/T12. Saves: F+11 Ref +8, W+7 (+2 vs charm/comp. Att +11, 1d10+8(18-20/x2). SA +3d6. Reach 10 ft, AoO 3/turn. CMB +11, CMD 23 Perc. +20, heal +22, Init +4. Sanity: 38, Thresh. 16, edge 19. Cond.: non Current extra buffs: Mutagen (str), Barkskin (+5ac and FF AC, +4 str > +2 att, +3 dmg, 3 CMB and +2 CMD).

Confident in his magical and alchemical protections, Andochtuir wades into the melee, ignoring the zombies and trying to find the path straight to the enemy leader. He ends alongside Yuto, his gaze fixed on the presumed caster as he towered above the line of undead.

Double move. With each square being 10 feet I can't really reach the main bad guy this turn. AC with barkskin, mutagen and shield should be 29 so he should be relatively safe for now.


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Round 1 Wrap-Up

Ritti dodges past the zombies with ease, before landing a terrific smash on the green-skinned man's chest, sending a shockwave of tearing force through his ribcage. He gasps, staggering back from the weight of the blow.

Andochtuir advances, approaching the combat as quickly as his large size will allow him.

The man stumbles back away from Ritti before taking a deep draught from a potion.

Round 2

Yuto, Torra, and Atsuko are up.

Statuses:

Yuto: HP 53/53, AC 21, touch 12, flat-footed 19, CMD 19, resolve 3/3, challenge 2/2, honor in all things 1/1, Helgarval’s protective aura, 3 Con damage (10 max HP), air walk 3 hours, 18 minutes
Torra: HP 69/70 (NL 12/69), AC 17, touch 13, flat-footed 14, CMD 12, DR 4/adamantine, Burn 2
Andochtuir: HP 52/52, AC 29, touch 10, flat-footed 25, CMD 22, strength mutagen 45 minutes, see invisibility 45 minutes, barkskin 45 minutes, deafened 59 minutes, enlarge person 5 minutes, shield 5 minutes
Ritti: HP 33/35 (3/33 nonlethal), AC 25, touch 20, Flat-Footed 25, CMD 26, mage armor 57 minutes
Atsuko: HP 51/51, AC 20, touch 14, flat-footed 15, CMD 18, bardic performance 9/13
All Save Andochtuir: Inspire Courage


She/they Dwarf Kineticist 7 | HP 81/81 (14 NL) | AC 18/13/15| DR 3/adamantine | F +12 R +9 W +7 | CMB +4; CMD 17 | Init +3 | Speed 20 ft. | Perception +18; Darkvision 60' | Sanity: 36/36, Threshold 2, Edge 18

Torra hesitates for a moment, caught between wanting to help out Yuto and Andochtuir who are being beset by undead, and protecting Ritti, who is facing the green-skinned man alone.

She settles on the latter, pulling up earth and stone to hurl at him.

Attack non-undead, IC: 1d20 + 8 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 8 + 2 = 28 Damage: 3d6 + 10 + 2 ⇒ (2, 4, 4) + 10 + 2 = 22


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

Yuto's face freezes as he sees the zombies surrounding him, but he stretches his teeth resolved after hearing Atsuko's epic song "Remember Tamura Benjiro saying, the tree might be too strong to fall, but take the shaky leaves one by one, and it will just fall overtime"

The wannabe samurai slices right and left, trying to drop black first, then white, while chunks of stone fly towards the green necromancer.
Suishen-CE+IC: 1d20 + 13 - 2 + 2 ⇒ (10) + 13 - 2 + 2 = 23
Slashing damage+flaming+IC: 1d8 + 7 + 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (4) + 7 + (2) + 2 = 15

Suishen-CE+IC: 1d20 + 13 - 2 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 13 - 2 + 2 = 19
Slashing damage+flaming+IC: 1d8 + 7 + 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 7 + (2) + 2 = 14

Once his attacks are finished, he steps over any space left by a fallen zombie.

HP 58-5/58-5 AC 23 TAC 14 (+2 vs evil)
3 Con damage
air walk 200 min
lesser protective aura
combat expertise (+2 AC)


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Round 2 Midpoint

Yuto cuts two of the zombies down with a whirl of Suishen's fiery blade, and the scent of scorched flesh fills the air as Torra blasts at the green-skinned man. Although he attempts to dodge behind Yuto's profile for cover, her projectile smashes into his shoulder, sending him staggering back another few steps.

Atsuko takes a step forwards, easily dodging around Yuto and the grasping hands of the remaining zombie nearby to him. Now next to the thing, she slashes it down with her seax.
Acrobatics vs. Zombie CMD: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (20) + 7 = 27
Broken-Back Seax vs. Blue-Lined Zombie, Inspire Courage: 1d20 + 8 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 8 + 2 = 13
Damage, Inspire Courage: 1d10 + 4 + 2 ⇒ (7) + 4 + 2 = 13

The last remaining zombie, lined in red growls, stepping around Andochtuir and attacking Atsuko in an astonishing (and likely impossible) display of wits. Even so, Atsuko is more than prepared to evade its startlingly quick strike.
Slam vs. Atsuko: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (9) + 5 = 14

Knowledge (religion) DC 17:
There are stories about zombies that retain some glimpses of their living days' intellect and skill. These are called juju zombies, and they typically are both quicker and smarter than usual zombies - to say nothing of being able to wield the skills they once knew. It is likely that this is one such zombie.

Ritti & Andochtuir are up.

Statuses:

Yuto: HP 53/53, AC 21, touch 12, flat-footed 19, CMD 19, resolve 3/3, challenge 2/2, honor in all things 1/1, Helgarval’s protective aura, 3 Con damage (10 max HP), air walk 3 hours, 18 minutes
Torra: HP 69/70 (NL 12/69), AC 17, touch 13, flat-footed 14, CMD 12, DR 4/adamantine, Burn 2
Andochtuir: HP 52/52, AC 29, touch 10, flat-footed 25, CMD 22, strength mutagen 45 minutes, see invisibility 45 minutes, barkskin 45 minutes, deafened 59 minutes, enlarge person 5 minutes, shield 5 minutes
Ritti: HP 33/35 (3/33 nonlethal), AC 25, touch 20, Flat-Footed 25, CMD 26, mage armor 57 minutes
Atsuko: HP 51/51, AC 20, touch 14, flat-footed 15, CMD 18, bardic performance 9/13
All Save Andochtuir: Inspire Courage


HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'

The explosion of rock that slams the green man into the wall makes Ritti flinch. But when the rock dust clears and the green fella is still standing… Fine. We’ll do this the hard way.

Ritti steps toward the green man and sends a set of fast punches towards his head.

FREE: 5’ (on map)
FULL: FOB Mr. Green

BOOM:
Knowledge: Religion vs DC17: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (1) + 6 = 7

FULL: Unarmed Strike (crit: 20/2x | B)
Mods: FOB, Inspired
HIT #1: 1d20 + 10 + 2 ⇒ (14) + 10 + 2 = 26 | DAM #1: 1d6 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 5 + 2 = 12
HIT #2: 1d20 + 10 + 2 ⇒ (17) + 10 + 2 = 29 | DAM #2: 1d6 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (4) + 5 + 2 = 11

Status:
HP: 33 / 35 | AC:25 / T:20 / FF:25 | CMD:26/26 (28 Grapple) – AC +4
Stunning Fist (3):
Boots (1):
Shozoku (1):
Inspired (1):
Arrows (20): xxxx
Shuriken (5):
Shuriken Earthfire (3):

Effects:
Mage Armor – 1 hr


M Unbuffed stats: Hp 60/60, AC 23/FF22/T12. Saves: F+11 Ref +8, W+7 (+2 vs charm/comp. Att +11, 1d10+8(18-20/x2). SA +3d6. Reach 10 ft, AoO 3/turn. CMB +11, CMD 23 Perc. +20, heal +22, Init +4. Sanity: 38, Thresh. 16, edge 19. Cond.: non Current extra buffs: Mutagen (str), Barkskin (+5ac and FF AC, +4 str > +2 att, +3 dmg, 3 CMB and +2 CMD).

With the caster being just too far away even from his new position, Andochtuir drops hus fauchard, instead drawing his longsword as he slashed into the nearby monster. Hopefully Ritti could manage by herself just a little while longer...

Magical slashing enlarged longsword, inspire courage: 1d20 + 13 ⇒ (5) + 13 = 18
damage: 2d6 + 18 ⇒ (3, 6) + 18 = 27


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We are back to your regularly scheduled game. Apologies for the delay on my end.

Round 2 Wrap-Up

Ritti follows after the troll-like man, continuing her assault. She smashes through his guard, shattering bone and bruising flesh. He growls his pain, but forces himself to remain upright.

Meanwhile, Andochtuir slashes down the last of the zombies, bisecting it with a single swing of his enchanted sword,

With a grunt, the lone remaining foe stumbles away from Ritti and pulls a strange egg-like object from his pouch. With a sharp gesture, he tosses it to the ground, shattering it and sending up a thick smoke around them. Ritti immediately loses sight of him, such is the thickness of the fog.

Round 3

Yuto, Torra, and Atsuko are up. Currently, both Ritti and the enemy are obscured.

Statuses:

Yuto: HP 53/53, AC 21, touch 12, flat-footed 19, CMD 19, resolve 3/3, challenge 2/2, honor in all things 1/1, Helgarval’s protective aura, 3 Con damage (10 max HP), air walk 3 hours, 18 minutes
Torra: HP 69/70 (NL 12/69), AC 17, touch 13, flat-footed 14, CMD 12, DR 4/adamantine, Burn 2
Andochtuir: HP 52/52, AC 29, touch 10, flat-footed 25, CMD 22, strength mutagen 45 minutes, see invisibility 45 minutes, barkskin 45 minutes, deafened 59 minutes, enlarge person 5 minutes, shield 5 minutes
Ritti: HP 33/35 (3/33 nonlethal), AC 25, touch 20, Flat-Footed 25, CMD 26, mage armor 57 minutes
Atsuko: HP 51/51, AC 20, touch 14, flat-footed 15, CMD 18, bardic performance 9/13
All Save Andochtuir: Inspire Courage


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

"O-ok, I do not know who are you, but you are ba-badly hurt, better surrender before it is too late" Yuto says while trying to pierce into the fog with his vision.

Moving into the edge of the fog, he readies an attack in case he sees the enemy and he is not surrendering.
Suishen-CE+IC: 1d20 + 13 - 2 + 2 ⇒ (9) + 13 - 2 + 2 = 22
Slashing damage+flaming+IC: 1d8 + 7 + 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 7 + (1) + 2 = 15

HP 58-5/58-5 AC 23 TAC 14 (+2 vs evil)
3 Con damage
air walk 200 min
lesser protective aura
combat expertise (+2 AC)


Female Human Bard 6 / Oracle 1 | HP: 59/59 | AC: 20 (T: 14, F: 15) | CMB: +6, CMD: 19 | F: +6, R +9, W: +6 | Init: +3| Perc: +7, SM: +14 | Speed 30' | Performance: 20/20

Atsuko doesn't think it's a good idea to venture into the smoke, where everyone is an undifferentiated friend and enemy, which will likely descend into all against all for caution's sake.

Instead she stays at the ready where she is and continues her story.

Continuing Inspire Courage.


She/they Dwarf Kineticist 7 | HP 81/81 (14 NL) | AC 18/13/15| DR 3/adamantine | F +12 R +9 W +7 | CMB +4; CMD 17 | Init +3 | Speed 20 ft. | Perception +18; Darkvision 60' | Sanity: 36/36, Threshold 2, Edge 18

Likewise, Torra holds outside the smoky area, ready to blast the enemy again should they show their face without surrendering.

1d6d1d20 + 8 ⇒ (14, 20, 18, 1) + 8 = 613d6 + 10 ⇒ (4, 5, 1) + 10 = 20

The dice roller seems to be broken, every time I edit to try and correct it it adds more d20s to the attack roll. The first roll is 14, for a total 22 attack once the enemy is visible again.


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Shoot, I actually forgot that everyone can act before the last enemy can. Ritti and Andochtuir are up.


HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'

Round 3

Ritti waves a hand, trying futilely to clear the smoke in front of her face. No good. Tricky bastard! She had to admire troll-boy’s tenacity and his ability to take punches.

Fortunately, she knew roughly where he was before he dropped the egg. But he could have moved afterwards, maybe. Rather than chase him through the smoke, the thief tries to hem him in or catch him before he could slink off. She steps into the heart of the smoke searching for her quarry. Spying a shape through the smoke… she strikes!

”He’s in the corner! If he bolts one way or another, I’ll call out.”

FREE: 5’ (on map)
FULL: FOB Mr. Green

If this is like Fog Cloud, I’ve got a 20% miss chance. I’m including that with my rolls. Low is bad.

BOOM:

FULL: Unarmed Strike (crit: 20/2x | B)
Mods: FOB, Inspired
HIT #1: 1d20 + 10 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 10 + 2 = 24 | DAM #1: 1d6 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 5 + 2 = 13 | Miss (<21%): 1d100 ⇒ 54
HIT #2: 1d20 + 10 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 10 + 2 = 18 | DAM #2: 1d6 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 5 + 2 = 8 | Miss (<21%): 1d100 ⇒ 19

Unless he’s got another trick up his sleeve, if he tries to get past me, he’ll trigger an AoO. I’m including one here, just in case.
AoO: 1d20 + 10 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 10 + 2 = 30 | DAM #1: 1d6 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 5 + 2 = 8 | Miss (<21%): 1d100 ⇒ 71

Status:
HP: 33 / 35 | AC:25 / T:20 / FF:25 | CMD:26/26 (28 Grapple) – AC +4
Stunning Fist (3):
Boots (1):
Shozoku (1):
Inspired (1):
Arrows (20): xxxx
Shuriken (5):
Shuriken Earthfire (3):

Effects:
Mage Armor – 1 hr


Loot List | Terrain Map | Encounter Maps | Caravan

Round 3 Wrap-Up

Torra and Yuto prepare for their enemy's emergence while Atsuko resumes her tale, inspiring them to greater heights.

Ritti rushes forwards, slamming the green man even in his smoke-obscured state. She feels his organs tear beneath her blows, his bones twist and crack. However her second volley misses, thrown off by the dense smoke.

Andochtuir steps forwards, readying his own attack for their enemy's emergence.
Readied Attack: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (8) + 12 = 20
Damage: 2d6 + 17 ⇒ (3, 1) + 17 = 21

Ritti:
However, despite the heroes' expectations, Ritti sees him attempt to pull... a tail of smoke? He leaves himself open to another retaliatory kick, which cracks against his knee. Then he pulls himself... up? and disappears from view.

Combat Over?

Statuses:

Yuto: HP 53/53, AC 21, touch 12, flat-footed 19, CMD 19, resolve 3/3, challenge 2/2, honor in all things 1/1, Helgarval’s protective aura, 3 Con damage (10 max HP), air walk 3 hours, 18 minutes
Torra: HP 69/70 (NL 12/69), AC 17, touch 13, flat-footed 14, CMD 12, DR 4/adamantine, Burn 2
Andochtuir: HP 52/52, AC 29, touch 10, flat-footed 25, CMD 22, strength mutagen 45 minutes, see invisibility 45 minutes, barkskin 45 minutes, deafened 59 minutes, enlarge person 5 minutes, shield 5 minutes
Ritti: HP 33/35 (3/33 nonlethal), AC 25, touch 20, Flat-Footed 25, CMD 26, mage armor 57 minutes
Atsuko: HP 51/51, AC 20, touch 14, flat-footed 15, CMD 18, bardic performance 8/13
All Save Andochtuir: Inspire Courage


HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'

Round 4-ish?

Tricky snake!

Ritti has met a few spellslingers in her day and this seems like something she might have seen before. First, she hurls a set of shurikens right where he climbed and disappeared. Second, she calls for backup while keeping her eyes exactly on the spot where troll-boy disappeared.

”Yuto, Torra, Atsuko… Get in here, now. Follow my voice. Our boy pulled a magic trick but I think he is still here. I swear I’ve seen something like this before.” She keeps talking as they approach. ”It looked like he pulled a tail of smoke maybe out of the air and then climbed up it and disappeared. I might'a nicked him with one of those poison shuriken but I just don't know.”

FULL: FOB Shurikens

BOOM:

FULL: Unarmed Strike (crit: 20/2x | 10’ | P)
Mods: FOB
HIT #1: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (8) + 10 = 18 | DAM #1: 1d2 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2 | Miss (?% - low is bad): 1d100 ⇒ 28
HIT #2: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (20) + 10 = 30 | DAM #2: 1d2 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3 | Miss (?% - low is bad): 1d100 ⇒ 83 Crit?
Confirm: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (4) + 10 = 14 | CRIT DAM: 1d2 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2
Bluff: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (2) + 4 = 6 <- Don't think he's gonna buy the lie about the poison shuriken

Status:
HP: 33 / 35 | AC:25 / T:20 / FF:25 | CMD:26/26 (28 Grapple) – AC +4
Stunning Fist (3):
Boots (1):
Shozoku (1):
Inspired (1):
Arrows (20): xxxx
Shuriken (5): xx
Shuriken Earthfire (3):

Effects:
Mage Armor – 1 hr


She/they Dwarf Kineticist 7 | HP 81/81 (14 NL) | AC 18/13/15| DR 3/adamantine | F +12 R +9 W +7 | CMB +4; CMD 17 | Init +3 | Speed 20 ft. | Perception +18; Darkvision 60' | Sanity: 36/36, Threshold 2, Edge 18

Torra rushes into the smoke, following the sound of Ritti speaking, then looks up towards the area of the ceiling that she is pointing at.

Perception: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (11) + 12 = 23


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

"No, no, don't let him raise the alert!" seeing Ritti gesturing just in front of him, Yuto steps over in the air once more, raising over Ritti's head, just to try strike into the corner, and 5' over the ground, where it seems she is pointing out.
Suishen+IC: 1d20 + 13 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 13 + 2 = 33
Slashing damage+flaming+IC: 1d8 + 7 + 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 7 + (1) + 2 = 13

Crit?: 1d20 + 13 + 2 ⇒ (4) + 13 + 2 = 19
Slashing damage+flaming+IC: 1d8 + 7 + 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (7) + 7 + (2) + 2 = 18
Intimidate (demoralize; immediate action): 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (13) + 9 = 22

HP 58-5/58-5 AC 21 TAC 12 (+2 vs evil)
3 Con damage
air walk (5' up) 200 min
lesser protective aura


Loot List | Terrain Map | Encounter Maps | Caravan

Despite their best efforts, the heroes attacks do not seem to do anything other than swish through the smoke. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem like you're able to land any strikes.


HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'

Can we bot Atsuko trying to ID the spell used with Spellcraft? It might give us an angle.

Ritti is like a dog that won’t give up a bone. ”He’s here. I’m almost sure of it! He didn’t just pop out of existence!” The thief begins to feel around carefully where she saw that ‘tail’ of smoke and just above that spot... hoping it is just hidden in the smoke. Come on... come on...

Perception: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (16) + 12 = 28


M Unbuffed stats: Hp 60/60, AC 23/FF22/T12. Saves: F+11 Ref +8, W+7 (+2 vs charm/comp. Att +11, 1d10+8(18-20/x2). SA +3d6. Reach 10 ft, AoO 3/turn. CMB +11, CMD 23 Perc. +20, heal +22, Init +4. Sanity: 38, Thresh. 16, edge 19. Cond.: non Current extra buffs: Mutagen (str), Barkskin (+5ac and FF AC, +4 str > +2 att, +3 dmg, 3 CMB and +2 CMD).

Stepping forward and trying to clear some of the smoke, Andochtuir looked around, relying on his alchemically-enhanced sight to spot even invisible hiding places. Perhaps he was deaf, but the confusion one everyone's face was clear. Just where did the last one go...?

perception if needed, See Invisibility is still active: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (7) + 15 = 22


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

Yuto walks out of the cloud, looking right and left "We-were did it go? I-is it possible he just disappeared like that? Lost in the smoke?"

The man looks down the corridor for signs of anyone walking up there, or opening the door "Ains. We shouldn't had Riftun leave. He would know how to undo these magic tricks..."
Perception: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (8) + 10 = 18
Survival (to track?): 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (13) + 4 = 17


Female Human Bard 6 / Oracle 1 | HP: 59/59 | AC: 20 (T: 14, F: 15) | CMB: +6, CMD: 19 | F: +6, R +9, W: +6 | Init: +3| Perc: +7, SM: +14 | Speed 30' | Performance: 20/20

Atsuko stays outside the smoke against Ritti's request. Too many cooks...

Instead she keeps an eye on anything that might be coming out.

Perception: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (14) + 6 = 20

Spellcraft (In case she's asked about the spell(?) or sees something that suggests a spell): 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (19) + 6 = 25

Inspire Courage is still running due to Lingering Performance.


She/they Dwarf Kineticist 7 | HP 81/81 (14 NL) | AC 18/13/15| DR 3/adamantine | F +12 R +9 W +7 | CMB +4; CMD 17 | Init +3 | Speed 20 ft. | Perception +18; Darkvision 60' | Sanity: 36/36, Threshold 2, Edge 18

Torra closes her eyes and reaches out to rest a hand on the wall, trying to feel any vibrations in the stone.

Perception, tremorsense: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (15) + 12 = 27


Loot List | Terrain Map | Encounter Maps | Caravan

It wasn't actually a spell, unfortunately, but an item (albeit one that you've found before - fugitive's grenade, so you can identify it as such.

The cloud of smoke swiftly clears, leaving no visible sign of anything else present. Even Torra cannot detect anything with her enhanced senses of the earth's vibrations.

Andochtuir:
There is a strange disk hovering in the air - it looks almost like a window facing downwards, but Andochtuir cannot see anything inside of it from either direction.


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

"S-so, he really isn't here anymore?" Yuto blinks multiple times in disbelief as the smoke dissipates "Ma-maybe he god into this room?"

The grizzled man shyly touches the southern door pommel, and tries to open it.


HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'

Have I seen one of these fugitive's grenade's before?


M Unbuffed stats: Hp 60/60, AC 23/FF22/T12. Saves: F+11 Ref +8, W+7 (+2 vs charm/comp. Att +11, 1d10+8(18-20/x2). SA +3d6. Reach 10 ft, AoO 3/turn. CMB +11, CMD 23 Perc. +20, heal +22, Init +4. Sanity: 38, Thresh. 16, edge 19. Cond.: non Current extra buffs: Mutagen (str), Barkskin (+5ac and FF AC, +4 str > +2 att, +3 dmg, 3 CMB and +2 CMD).

"Stand back. There is some sort of portal here, floating in mid-air. Yes, it probably sounds crazy. But if you can't see it, it is probably invisible. Be ready for anything," The warrior states, peering at the disk. Taking a deep breath, the giant sends through his enlarged, heaviliy protected arm, grapsing at what was beyond, and should he find anything, pulling it back out with all his might!

Don't know the required stat or roll for this. Andy is enlarged and has 24 effective strength, and 28 effective ac with shield, barkskin and mutagen. He is at +13 CMB if lingering inspiration still buffs him. If nothing happens, he retries a couple of times, then attempts to enter if he can.


HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'

Ritti stands ready. She whispers, "If that doesn't work, maybe you can lift me up there."


M Unbuffed stats: Hp 60/60, AC 23/FF22/T12. Saves: F+11 Ref +8, W+7 (+2 vs charm/comp. Att +11, 1d10+8(18-20/x2). SA +3d6. Reach 10 ft, AoO 3/turn. CMB +11, CMD 23 Perc. +20, heal +22, Init +4. Sanity: 38, Thresh. 16, edge 19. Cond.: non Current extra buffs: Mutagen (str), Barkskin (+5ac and FF AC, +4 str > +2 att, +3 dmg, 3 CMB and +2 CMD).

"Fearless, aren't you? Who knows what lies beyond." Andochtuir smiles at Ritti from above. "Let me take whatever ambush the necromancer is preparing on the other side first."


HP 67/67 Sanity 32/34 [2] AC 26 TAC 12 FF 24 | CMD 24 | F +7 R +4 W +5 (+2 vs evil and fear, endure elements) | Challenge: 3/3 Resolve: 4/4 Honor: 1/2 | Ini: +2 | Senses: +11
Skills:
Acro+10,Bluff+4,Climb+15,Diplo+10,HandleA+6,Intim+10,K.history+12,K.nobilit y+12,K.planes+9,K.dung/religion/nature+4,Linguistics+3,SenseMotive+10,Survi val+5,Swim+10
Human (Tien) male Samurai (Yojimbo) 7 | Treasure | 3 Con damage

"I-Is it not too dangerous to place in just an arm S-Sir Andochtuir. He c-can just chop it off, o-or just avoid your grasp. W-without seeing inside it is just t-too dangerous." Yuto gulps a bit scared of space warping strange effect.


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HP:41 | AC:23 ; T:20 ; FF:23 ; CMD:27/27 | Fort:+5 ; Ref:+13 ; Will:+6 | Init:+5 ; PER:+13 (Low-light) | Sanity -- Score:40 ; Threshold:3 ; Edge:20 | Mv: 40'
Andochtuir wrote:
"Fearless, aren't you?"

Ritti smiles back. "Oh, I got fears. I fear numbers. Right now, it's us five against one nasty ogre-girl. Five on one - I like those numbers. But if that necromancer brings a whole bunch of soul-sucking ghost-vamp-zombies behind us... our five to one might become twelve to five... and that's a number that clenches my cheeks."

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