Navior's We Be Goblins (Inactive)

Game Master Navior

Chiggo looks at the fireworks with a touch of awe. He picks up one of the paper candles, and says, "Chiggo take Word Whacker to throw at Vorka before Chiggo breath fire on her. Chiggo not need ones that make fire, just big boom. Chiggo like big booms."

Pussl takes one of the paper candles. "Pussl blow longshank's shank's off with this, and then Stink will have blackened meat to feast on!"

Pussl takes one of the paper candles. "Pussl blow longshank's shank's off with this, and then Stink will have blackened meat to feast on!"

Chiggo's eyes light up at this suggestion.

"Oooooh!!!! Chiggo wonder what happen if you put these in mouth of long legs and then set off," he says excitedly, pointing to the Desnan Candles.

Reta listens to the ideas of Pussl and Chiggo. She gets lost in wonderment at the thought. Snapping out of it, "OKAY. RETA WILL TAKE REST. WE NOT LEAVE ANY BEHIND. WE BLOW UP LONGSHANKS AND LONGSHANKSES DOGS, AND THEN WE EAT LONGSHANKSES DOGS, AND THEN WE BURN VORKA AND THEN KILL VORKA, AND THEN WE EAT VORKA AND THEN WE GET OTHER PRETTIES THAT GO 'BOOM', AND THEN WE COME BACK AND RULE LICKTOADS AND THEN KILL BIRDCRUNCHERS! YAY!" She manages without breathing as she stuffs the rest in her pack. "RETA WILL HOLD PRETTIES THAT GO 'BOOM' FOR YOUSES ALL. RETA LIKE WATCHING PRETTIES THAT GO 'BOOM' BETTER. RETA MUCH GOODER AT CUTTING WITH SLICER." An malicious look forms on her face, as she loses herself in thought again and her voice drops to a "whisper". "Reta like cutting with slicer. Much more screamies that way." She salivates at the thought.

Awakening from her maniacal dream, she remembers Chiggo's wondorous idea of using a Desnan Candle in a psychotic way. "CHIGGO! HERE, TAKE THIS! RETA WANT TO SEE LONGSHANKSES MOUTH BLOW UP." She hands it to him and then claps at the idea. "RETA LIKE CHIGGO. CHIGGO GOODEST AT FIRE. THAT MAKE CHIGGO GOOD AT LIGHTING PRETTIES THAT GO 'BOOM'! MAYBE IF CHIGGO BLOW THINGS UP GOODEST, MAYBE CHIGGO FINALLY GET KISS FROM RETA." She states flatly, as she returns to rummaging through her satchel. "Oooooo! Reta forgets about shiny Reta seer!" She looks at herself in the mirror and giggles. "Reta is cute." She admits as she fixes her bridal veil.

Chuffy moves in and picks up two bang-snaps.

Okay, just to make sure I've got it straight who has what.
Poog: skyrocket
Chiggo: 1 paper candle and 1 Desnan candle (assuming he accepts this from Reta)
Pussl: 1 paper candle
Chuffy: 2 paper candles
Reta: 1 Desnan candle
Old Foofelah: hasn't claimed any fireworks and they've now all been used up; she may feel free to complain vehemently about this :)

With your fireworks in hand, you set out from the Licktoad village and into the swamp. The map is straightforward. All you need to do is just follow the creek west until you reach the fireworks!

How would you like to organize yourselves on the journey, i.e. marching order, scouting, etc.?

Okay, just to make sure I've got it straight who has what.

Poog: skyrocket
Chiggo: 1 paper candle and 1 Desnan candle (assuming he accepts this from Reta)
Pussl: 1 paper candle
Chuffy: 2 paper candles
Reta: 1 Desnan candle
Old Foofelah: hasn't claimed any fireworks and they've now all been used up; she may feel free to complain vehemently about this :)

With your fireworks in hand, you set out from the Licktoad village and into the swamp. The map is straightforward. All you need to do is just follow the creek west until you reach the fireworks!

How would you like to organize yourselves on the journey, i.e. marching order, scouting, etc.?

I thought goblins only scouted when you needed a CR1 scouting party as a random encounter or nighttime camping ambush!

Chiggo takes the Desnan candle from Reta, giving her a toothy grin. He also hills up his metal jug and battered brandy cask with the leftover juice from the fermented apples.

Chiggo is willing to scout, but isn't going to think of doing it himself.

Poog picks up and takes a look at the map. Then he points toward the east and shouts: "Let's go! We be fastest heroes ever, we back tonight big party in our honours!" Then he rushes off, with map and all.

And given a generous 45 degree deviation on both sides of the direction he's going, he has a good 1 in 4 chance of having picked the right way! Go Poog!

Chuffy takes some time to look over the map and tries to memorize how to get there.

Pussl isn't in any particular hurry but follows along at a steady pace behind some of the others, occasionally muttering snatches of his song under his breath. Stink is sent ahead to seek trouble and return if he finds it.

Pussl isn't much for scouting or leading the attack either so he'll stay behind someone or other. His wolverine can move ahead using the Seek Trick and aid in the scouting, returning to warn of any humans or dogs.

Having stayed up late the night before and slept through the commotion of the morning due to her hearing impairment, Old Foofelah waddles up late, dragging two bags of belongings but obviously not having neglected her morning toilette, her ramshackle wig and wide-brimmed hat perched on her head and a miasma of cheap perfume accompanying her. "Why goblins not moving yet?" she snaps unreasonably. "Old Foofelah does not have time to be waiting on yous!"

Most of the rest of the tribe is out to watch as you set off into the marsh. A few cheer you on, a few others sing the Licktoad song, but most just watch silently.

The trek through the bog is tedious. The mud slows you down somewhat, but you're pretty sure it won't be a long journey. After all, the map somehow fits the whole journey onto one piece of paper! It can't be a very long trip at all. After an hour of travel, you're quite surprised you haven't reached there yet.

Chiggo Perception: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (7) + 5 = 12
Chuffy Perception: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (8) + 5 = 13
Old Foofelah Perception: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (10) + 1 = 11
Poog Percpetion: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (14) + 2 = 16
Pussl Perception: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (9) + 6 = 15
Reta Perception: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (16) + 9 = 25
Stinker Perception: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (9) + 1 = 10 + 8 scent = 18
Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many Stealth: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (8) + 9 = 17

You're only slightly more startled when Stinker comes rushing back from up ahead. About the same moment, Reta notices something large in branches of a tree up ahead. It has numerous long black legs and a bulbous body. It can be only one thing: Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many!

Chiggo Initiative: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (17) + 4 = 21
Chuffy Initiative: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (10) + 4 = 14
Old Foofelah Initiative: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (8) + 4 = 12
Poog Initiative: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (6) + 6 = 12
Pussl Initiative: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (19) + 1 = 20
Reta Initiative: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (5) + 3 = 8
Stinker Initiative: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (7) + 3 = 10
Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many Initiative: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (16) + 5 = 21
Order: Longlegss Chiggo, Pussl, Chuffy, Poog, Old Foofelah, Stinker, Reta.

ROUND 1

Active Magical Effects:
None.

Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many moves to the edge of the tree, coming into clear sight of everyone now. Her mandibles twitch in excitement for her coming meal. Ready to drop on anyone who comes in reach.

Next Up: Chiggo, Pussl, Chuffy, Poog, Old Foofelah, Stinker, Reta, Longlegs.

Map Added to Site
The map is called "Longlegs" and can be found in the Library section.

Earlier
"WE LEAVE NOW, OLD FOOFELAH." She tells her as Reta moves up front for scouting. "Reta sees sneaksies gooder than most gobbies. Reta will be watcher for group." She tells them as she keeps a lookout.

Present

Noticing the large vermin, "LONGLEGS EAT GOBLIN BABIES MANY! LONGLEGS EAT GOBLIN BABIES MANY!" She warns as she points.

Chiggo moves up to E16, weaving to and fro as the adrenaline mixes with the alcohol he's been drinking almost steadily since leaving the village. He trips on a few roots, throwing himself unexpectedly in several directions, which happens to throw off his own attacks as well as those of anything attacking him. Fighting "defensively" -4 to attack, +2 to AC making his AC 18

Stunning kick attack on the Longlegs Eat Goblins Many's squishies.
Attack: 1d20 + 2 - 4 ⇒ (16) + 2 - 4 = 14
Damage: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3
Spider makes Fortitude Save DC 11 or be stunned for 1 round

Inevitable fortitude save: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (10) + 1 = 11

Chuffy moves to F15 and readies his dogslicer.

Pussl eyes the beast approaching and calls to his companion.

"Stink! To me!"

He moves forward a little and draws his spear.

Pussl moves to D19. Stink moves to E19.

Edit: Just noticed Chiggo's actions likely negate my own so I changed them to make more sense.

As Chiggo moves up to strike, the spider snaps down at him with her pincers.

Longlegs bite: 1d20 + 4 + 1 ⇒ (11) + 4 + 1 = 16 -- hit
Damage: 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (4) + 2 = 6 + 1d2 ⇒ 1 Str (his Fort save was a fail)

Her pincers bite into Chiggo's shoulder, tearing a chunk of flesh away. In addition to the pain, there's a tingling sensation that starts to spread through his body. Already, he's feeling physically weaker.

Pussl moves forward, drawing his spear. Chuffy also moves forward.

Next Up: Poog, Old Foofelah, Stink, Reta, Longlegs, Chiggo, Pussl, Chuffy.

Map Updated

Fighting defensively doesn't help against the readied attack? Oh well. Did his kick at least hit?

Fighting defensively doesn't help against the readied attack? Oh well. Did his kick at least hit?

Sorry, my goof. I forgot the fighting defensively. Ignore the hit. It didn't happen and he's not poisoned. His attack did miss though, which I totally forgot to mention in the last post, and I had intended to colour it with him discovering that Longlegs doesn't have any squishies to kick. :)

Round 1, Initiative 12
AC 17; HP 10/10

Poog cusses out at the spider, "Whaa!! Why you not eat Old Foofelah yet? She too sneaksies for you? You not trying hard enough! So now you burn!" As he proclaims he scurries closer to F18 and shoots fiery death.

Attack, fire bolt, ranged touch 1d20 + 3 - 4 ⇒ (17) + 3 - 4 = 16 damage 1d6 ⇒ 4

Old Foofelah lets out a throaty chuckle. "Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many like Old Foofelah. Old Foofelah sends not-good-enough infants into the swamp to Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many. But that one cheated Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many," she shrieks, pointing at Pussl. "She not satisfied until he is in her belly. Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many! Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many! Here is one you want!"

Not in any immediate danger herself, Old Foofelah will delay.

The bolt of fire shoots out from Poog's hand and collides with Longlegs' abdomen. The giant spider quivers angrily.

Old Foofelah taunts the spider while Stinker moves beside Pussl. The wolvering hisses at Old Foofelah.

Next Up: Reta, Longlegs, Chiggo, Pussl, Chuffy, Poog, Old Foofelah (subject to delayed action), Stinker.

Map Updated

"Chiggo think Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many no like fire. Chiggo give fire."

Chiggo takes a swig from his jug and spews the rancid alcohol into his torch at the spider.

Ranged touch attack: 1d20 + 5 - 4 ⇒ (15) + 5 - 4 = 16
Damage: 1d3 ⇒ 3

A big gout of flame erupts from the goblin's wide mouth, bathing the arachnid in fire and goblin spit.

Chuffy continues to circle around Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many. Once in position, Chuffy strikes.
Dogslicer: flank??, sneak attack
to hit 1d20 + 6 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 6 + 2 = 28 damage 1d4 + 1d6 ⇒ (1) + (5) = 6
Possible crit: flank??, sneak attack
to hit 1d20 + 6 + 2 ⇒ (11) + 6 + 2 = 19 damage 1d4 ⇒ 2

"Reta HATE LONGLEGS EAT GOBLIN BABIES MANY!" She spews out as she draws her slicer while moving to attack.

Move to C 16

Dogslicer: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (1) + 3 = 4

Missing horribly, Reta looks down at her broken dogslicer. "Reta thinks she maybe should run." She concludes, shockingly in a normal voice.

How many freaking ones can one dude roll in various pbp's? If you really want to know, just ask. I can tell you.

Ah, the joys of dogslicers. :)

Reta swings up at Longlegs, but her blade hits one of the thick branches of the tree and cracks.

ROUND 2

Active Magical Effects:
None.

Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many doesn't even seem to notice that Reta tried to attack and snaps again at Chiggo.

Longlegs bite on Chiggo: 1d20 + 4 + 1 ⇒ (5) + 4 + 1 = 10 -- miss

Chiggo is just a bit too short for her, however, and her bite snaps at the air above his head.

Chiggo raises his jug to take a mouthful from it, and Longlegs snaps at him again.

Longlegs bite AoO on Chiggo: 1d20 + 4 + 1 ⇒ (19) + 4 + 1 = 24 -- hit
Damage: 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5
Chiggo Fortitude: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (15) + 1 = 16 -- pass

Chiggo takes a mouthful of the alcohol and prepares to spit it at the beast. Recall that taking a mouthful is a standard action, and then it's another standard action to spit it out, so you need to wait till next round before breathing fire. However, you may save your attack roll till then, as it will hit (unless somebody casts a mage armour spell or something on the spider).

Chuffy moves in and strikes at Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many. The Gorge of Gluttons slices into the spiders back. As the spider is up in the branches (essentially one square up), it's not possible to flank her from the ground. However, he did get the critical, so did 3 points of damage total.

Next Up: Pussl, Chuffy, Poog, Old Foofelah (subject to delayed action), Stinker, Reta, Longlegs, Chiggo, Chuffy.

Map Updated

"Reta!" Old Foofelah scolds sharply. "You get out of way of Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many! She is not knowing you from traitor who spies for Birdcrunchers!"

Except I took Rapid Reload specifically so it would take a move action.

Pussl looks with disgust at all the goblins blocking his attack. Then he shrugs and throws his spear.

Ranged Attack: 1d20 + 2 - 4 ⇒ (4) + 2 - 4 = 2
Damage: 1d6 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 1 = 7

"Get out of Pussl's way!"

He draws his club and steps closer to battle. Then he glances back at Stink. "Stink! Heel!"
5-Foot step to 18. The wolverine should move in step with him on its turn.

Except I took Rapid Reload specifically so it would take a move action.

Sigh. You're right. Man, I keep messing up with your character. Sorry about that. I think I'll go hit my head on a wall now...

Chiggo takes a swig from his jug and then spits it out. As the liquid passes the flame of his torch, it explodes into a jet of flame that sears the spider's face.

Pussl tosses his spear, which lands in the marsh behind Chiggo.

Next Up: Poog, Old Foofelah (subject to delayed action), Stinker, Reta, Longlegs, Chiggo, Chuffy, Pussl.

Map Updated

BUMP FOR CLUMSY POOG!

Sorry!

Round 2, Initiative 12
AC 12; HP 10/10

"Reta go hit harder! Zarongel demands it!" Poog, not being unwise at all, moves to behind Reta at C17 and taps her bum with guidance.

Reta feels just a little more confidant about her actions as the guidance takes effect.

Stink follows Pussl.

I'll presume Old Foofelah is still delaying until Joana says otherwise. Since she's delaying, she can act at any time.

Next Up: Reta, Longlegs, Chiggo, Chuffy, Pussl, Poog, Old Foofelah (subject to delayed action), Stinker.

Map Updated

"You! Goblin!" Old Foofelah snaps at Poog. "Get mind out of gutter and stop patting Reta's girly parts!"

"Old Goofeleh needs stopping look at Reta's girly parts and starts helping us kill Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many!" Chiggo shouts.

He braces himself for a big leap, then flails his feet wildly at the spider.
Flurry 1: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2
Nearly breaking his ankle as he kicks the tree, he yelps in pain, shaking his injured foot.
Flurry 2: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (7) + 1 = 8
Chiggo hobbles 5 feet backwards to nurse his boo-boos.

"BAH! Old Foofelah just jealous her girly parts don't get blessing of Zarongel!"

Chuffy will continue to try and get position and attack.

Dogslicer +1:
to hit 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (2) + 6 = 8 damage 1d4 ⇒ 4

"CLUMSY POOG, CHIGGO GET FIRST KISS! AND THEN MAYBE HE GET RETA'S GIRLY PARTS! UNLESS CHIGGO GET DEAD BY LONGLEGS EAT GOBLIN BABIES MANY! THEN MAYBE YOU GET KISS AND RETA'S GIRLY PARTS! RETA NOT SURE IF SHE LIKE YOU YET." She states as a matter of fact, as she backs up and drops her dogslicer. "STUPID SLICER!" She fumes, drawing her bow and firing.

5' step to B 16; Drop dogslicer, Draw bow; attack bug

Shortbow: 1d20 + 5 + 1 ⇒ (11) + 5 + 1 = 17
Damage: 1d4 ⇒ 1

Sorry. Didn't really want to go there. But now, the one phrase that I can't get out of my head is "nasty little rabbits." I blame Joana. You all should be very afraid. :)

Reta's arrow scrapes along the top of Longlegs, doing only minimal damage.

ROUND 3

Active Magical Effects:
None.

Longlegs bite on Chiggo: 1d20 + 4 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 4 + 1 = 25 -- hit, critical threat
Longlegs critical confirm: 1d20 + 4 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 4 + 1 = 11 -- not confirmed
Damage: 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 2 = 8
Chiggo Fortitude: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (10) + 1 = 11 -- fail
Poison Damage: 1d2 ⇒ 2 Str

Longlegs again snaps at Chiggo. This time, her mandibles tear into his shoulder near the neck. They come away bloody, and Chiggo collapses. Obviously, this negates the action you posted, but at least there's the consolation that he didn't nearly break his foot. :)

Chuffy attempts to attack Longlegs again, but gets only a few leaves.

Next Up: Pussl, Poog, Old Foofelah (subject to delayed action), Stinker, Reta, Longlegs, Chiggo, Chuffy.

Map Updated

"You goblins is useless," Old Foofelah says sourly. "And Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many is stupid. Eating wrong goblin. Over here, stupid Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many! THIS IS DOG-LOVING BIRDCRUNCHER SPY!" Her voice gets louder and louder as she goes on, until at last her mouth hangs open in an almost silent shriek. casting ear-piercing scream Fort DC 12

Longlegs Fortitude: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (2) + 6 = 8 -- fail
Damage: 1d6 ⇒ 2 sonic

Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many shudders as Old Foofelah screams at her. The spider is dazed. (There's an oddity in the duration for the spell. The duration is listed as "1 round/level; see text", but the text states that the daze effect lasts for 1 round and makes no mention of any other duration. Since it's just a 1st-level spell, my instinct is that the duration should just read 1 round. I welcome further discussion in the OOC thread, however, if you wish.)

Next Up: Pussl, Poog, Stinker, Reta, Longlegs, Chiggo, Chuffy, Old Foofelah.

Pussl raises club and rushes up to take out the Longlegs, now that all the hard work has been done.

"I will cut out your guts and feed it to Stink! Stink! Attack!"

Move to D16.
[ooc]Attack: 1d20 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (13) + 2 + 1 = 16
Damage: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 = 3

On his initiative (assuming the Longlegs is still up) Stink will move to E16 and attack.
Bite attack:1d20 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 2 = 22
Damage:1d4 ⇒ 3
Confirm Critical: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 2 = 22
Holy crap! Crit Damage: 1d4 ⇒ 1

Pussl steps over Chiggo's bleeding form and swings at the spider with his club, hitting it squarely over the head. The spider wobbles somewhat in its dazed state, almost falling out of the tree.

Next Up: Poog, Stinker, Reta, Longlegs (dazed), Chiggo, Chuffy, Old Foofelah.

Map Updated

"He ain'tn't dead yet," Poog says with a firm voice and steps in to take advantage of the distraction that Chuffy created.

Attack, dogslicer 1d20 + 1 + 2 ⇒ (4) + 1 + 2 = 7 damage 1d4 ⇒ 3

Poog's dogslicer follows in Chuffy's tradition and gets only leaves. Reminder: The spider is up in the tree, one square up, so you can't get flanking bonuses unless you can get up above it. :)

Of course, with that in mind, it creates the interest question of how Stinker manages to reach the spider. He does have a 5-ft reach though, so...

Stinker rushes forward and leaps up at the spider, his teeth sinking into the beast's face, ripping out several of its eyes. Stink lands on the ground, with bits of the spider still in his mouth. Longlegs Eat Goblin Babies Many loses her footing and falls from the tree. She lands on her side and falls onto her back. Her legs twitch for a moment before going still.

COMBAT OVER

You might want to get to Chiggo quickly. He's only got a couple rounds left... :)

Well, Chiggo's bleeding has reduced to a trickle, mostly because he's at -7 with an 8 Con, and just doesn't have much blood left!

You might want to get to Chiggo quickly. He's only got a couple rounds left... :)

Well, let's see. Old Foofelah has bleed.... :)

"Good Stink! Eat Longlegs guts!" Pussl pats the wolverine on his side and then notices Chiggo dying at his feet.

"Chiggo looks like bleeding pig. Does Zarongel like Chiggo?"

Hmmmm...Pussl isn't that inclined to waste his prize this soon into the quest. I hope Poog is faster.