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Heathy's Saltmarsh Campaign, II

Game Master Heathansson


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I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
"I have no idea what time it is. I can't see the sun." You hear metallic jingling of chains. "I can't...release you, either."
You hear the ghoul, climbing down the shaft. He's a way's away.
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
"Huh. I'll have to figure out a way to get us both loose, then." He sits still for a bit. "What's the smell? Do we have further company in here?"
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Spoiler:
"Oh,....it's only ratssss." Then, "They've eaten my legs off below the knees. When I was sleeping. Do you....have any liiiight?"
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
"Actually, I think I do. Give me a second..." Altai wriggles his fingers and mutters a few arcane phrases. "Rats ate your feet, eh? That sounds terribly uncomfortable. Inconvenient, too."

I have a Light cantrip memorised. Are my hands loose enough to squeeze it off? Any concentration checks needed?
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
You can bust it; you just flick your thumb against your index finger. You can see him, about 15 feet in front of you. He's chained to the wall, and his legs indeed don't seem to be there below his knees.
He looks like the saltatory old bearded guy chained in a dungeon, with scraggly hair, sores, scrungy clothing...truly sexy. He's chained by his wrists and his neck.
There's 5 rats the size of small dogs; they're kinda sniffing in your direction. Nasty f#&+ers!!!
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

...back in 15 minutes...
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
"Um... Those are some big rats." Altai looks desperately around for some way to get out of the chair before the rodents come for his feet as well.

Any way to fire off a Burning hands? Or am I pushing my luck too far?
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
you can cast with a concentration check of 15.
"Yes," your cellmate agrees. "I've named them all....I've been down here too long. That one---" he points at one of the rats that has it's paw resting on it's belly in an eerie caricature of a man, "that one is called Napoleon. I guess you wouldn't get it, though....heeheehee..."
Then...next to your right hand, a little piece of metal slides open in the chair's arm. There's a hole there, and it's filled with pieces of minced meat. Above, you can hear a "wooshing" sound, from right to left, and from left to right...
"I'm coming, Altai!!!" says the ghoul.
Male Silver Dragon

~looks around~ Hmmmmm..... I guess I need to read from the beginning. Heathy may be a fuzzball, but he sure has a good imagination. It would be worth the time to read everything. ~grins~ Shocking that I am saying something nice about Heathy! ~grins and winks~
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

oh, God, dude....read War and Peace; you'll be done quicker.
Male Silver Dragon
dungeonmaster heathy wrote:
oh, God, dude....read War and Peace; you'll be done quicker.

~laughter~ In English or Russian? ~pulls out my Russian dictionary~ I would have to teach myself Russian too! ~winks~

I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

either or.....this is some long stuff.

Man, my sick self has to get some shuteye.

In the main group, again, whenever Riese calls position, Stiggy rolled and won initiative.
Male Silver Dragon
dungeonmaster heathy wrote:

either or.....this is some long stuff.

Man, my sick self has to get some shuteye.

In the main group, again, whenever Riese calls position, Stiggy rolled and won initiative.

~Grins~ Nah! I trust you! Partially! I am sure that it would be worth the read.

Male Silver Dragon

Sleep well and I hope you feel better, Heathy!
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
"Meat? What the... Aha! Damn you, Amber! I'll have your hypothalamus for this!" Altai spits and snarls in rage as he twists in the chair. "Sorry if this stings a bit, old fellow, but this is not an... accurate invocation."

Concentration check 7+11=18. Casting Burning hands at the Rat Pack ahead of me. Damage 4+4+1+3+3=15, Reflex 16 for half.
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)
Sharoth wrote:
dungeonmaster heathy wrote:
either or.....this is some long stuff.
~Grins~ Nah! I trust you! Partially! I am sure that it would be worth the read.

Wow. We're up to 6700 or so posts? That's about twice the number of the second-biggest thread... Having said that, there are some real gems buried in here, and our party is the biggest collection of oddballs I've seen anywhere. Compared to the everyday antics of Stig or Riese, Altai's recent fascination with ghoul sculpture is small beans...

Male Silver Dragon
Altai Iscarni wrote:
Sharoth wrote:
dungeonmaster heathy wrote:
either or.....this is some long stuff.
~Grins~ Nah! I trust you! Partially! I am sure that it would be worth the read.
Wow. We're up to 6700 or so posts? That's about twice the number of the second-biggest thread... Having said that, there are some real gems buried in here, and our party is the biggest collection of oddballs I've seen anywhere. Compared to the everyday antics of Stig or Riese, Altai's recent fascination with ghoul sculpture is small beans...

~grins~ Well, like I said, I trust Heathy to have something interesting to say or read. ~WEG~ Now that does not mean that he always has something good to read. He is after all the master of inane and useless wit! ~grins, winks and runs~

Male Human Rogue 14

Agh! Dragon!
Male Silver Dragon

~Wicked, Toothy, Draconic grin~ Damn straight, oh little human!
M Halfling Barbarian 10

Bog off, dragon, we have a discussion thread for stuff like this. You are ruining Heathy's flow.
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Damn dragons....;)

Altai:

Spoiler:
the dire rats explode, falling over as blackened husks.
Scurrying forms come up on them; start nibbling.
"There's an endless supply of them rats, uh....mage..." says the prisoner.
"I'm coming Altai!" says the ghoul, now a mantra.
The swoosh left to right, right to left, swoosh swoosh swoosh every 10 seconds up above you continues.

Again; waiting on Riese to post a position and whatnot;
I guess it's not much of a hurry; today at work is gonna be a wild one so I doubt I'll be able to post as "incontinently" ;) as is my usual.
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
"Gotta start somewhere. What is that damnable noise?" Altai cranks his head around, looking for the swooshing sound's source.
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
glinting off the light from your hand, a metal glint; a curved blade swings left and right, edging closer to you; it's about 8 feet wide, attached to a chain, a vulgar slow metronome bringing that final cut...ever so slowly.
"I'm coming, Altai...." the ghoul, again. And the rats eat the burnt...
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
"Uh-oh. That's not good news."

My legs are free. Can I shuffle the chair away from the blade, or is it fastened to the floor?
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
you can always try a strength check; it is held fast and heavy; it will be veryvery very difficult...the rats slowly have finished their bakes; they cautiously come toward your toes, your feet...and the pendulum inches down.
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
Altai struggles against the bonds before giving up, then refocuses on the flashing blade. This is so crazy it actually might work...

Casting Scorching ray on the blade's chain attachement. With some luck, the chain's less resilient than the blade (insert 'weakest link' joke here) and wil be unable to resist the magical heat - especially with all the kinetic energy of the back-and-forth motion. Concentration check 11+11=22, damage 6+6+5=17.
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
It's about halfway done in from the blast of fire. It heats up red-hot. A few links look to be pulling out of shape, but it's still swinging....swinging......
one of the dire rats runs up; bites you in the shin real bad; take 3 h.p. in damage. The guy on the wall bellows, "get away from him!!! Leave him be, you rat bastich!!!" Maybe it's a trick of the light; for a second the prisoner's eyes look like doll's eyes.
Male human/lizardfolk form Paragon 3 /Evoker 3 (abjuration&enchantment barred) ---15096XP

Riese stays just outside the door and fires off a bolt at the dude behind the desk "Imbelia furtion de'flar, you bastard!!" 5d6=17 damage, DC 18 reflex for half.
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Dude rolled a 1 for reflex. You hit him in the ding dong.

"EYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! I'm going to kill you, hobniz!!!"
He was joking around before, but now he's really mad.

ROUND 1!!!!!
Male Human Rogue 14

Beldan whips up his crossbow and pops a bolt into the hobgoblin at C8.

14+8 = 22. Damage: 2 + 11 (sneak attack) = 13

Then he scoots back out the doorway, next to Riese.
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

1 down, 19 to go...
Beldan sticks the bolt in it's mouth, and the hobgoblin drops deader than a doornail.
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Take positions outside; call it ranks ZZ, YY, etc...at your leisure; they're mad now...
Male Human Rogue 14

ZZ 7
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Right on....You see a dark figure to the side moving frenetically......you turn; it's you in the mirror...
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
"Gaaaah! Goddamned vermin!" Altai grows more and more frenetic as he looks for a way out of his predicament.

Are the locks that hold me magical or mechanical?
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
mechanical...these curved hoops just slid out of the chair and latched you in. You did damage the chain somewhat.
"I'm coming Altai....oh, oh...KING OF THE WHITE KINGDOM!!! What is this?!?" the ghoul interjects.
"Oh noes!!!" screams the prisoner when he sees the ghoul.
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
I just want to let you know--I do see possibilities out of the predicament...all is not lost...
I get so happy when I come up with an interesting thought puzzle...
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
"Stay out of the blade's way! I've got a plan... Keep those damn rats off my legs, willya?" Once again, Altai begins casting a spell...

Converting Dispel magic into Summon monster III, which I'll use to summon a celestial bison. Once it arrives, I'll tell it to knock my chair off the floor and into a safe corner. With some luck, the chair will break, and I'll be a free man. Concentration check 9+11=20.
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:
ROFLMAO!!!!!

Spoiler:
well, that was kinda like one of the options I saw, but not quite.....

The White Buffalo appears to your side. He looks so serene, so contemplative, he should be sitting legs akimbo on his celestial lotus.
The chair strains under his pushing, there's a crack, and a crash, and you're loose of your restraints as the flimsy chair buckles and cracks apart under the buffalo's strainings.

The pendulum continues it's downward, lazy descent.

"Let me free, friend! Please..." begs the prisoner.
Liberty's Edge
Manwolf Werewoof testing upper middle class twit 5

Eat your telltale heart out, Edgar Allen Poe.
Actually, much props, and I hope my meagre dabblings did you much homage...
Male Silver Dragon
Heathansson wrote:

Eat your telltale heart out, Edgar Allen Poe.

Actually, much props, and I hope my meagre dabblings did you much homage...

I liked it, Heathy! ~exits quickly before I am lynched for interupting again~

Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
"I'll get you loose in a minute - but first I need to deal with the flashing blade."

Any chance of having the bison slam into whatever it is that anchors the blade-and chain?
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
Naah, but it's pretty much going to swing down into the ground in 5 minutes and come grinding to a halt...the trap has been nullified. You could also reach out and catch the chain and stop it in two minutes, if you wanted to.
Male Human Wizard 17 (Conjuration specialist)

Spoiler:
I'll just wait, then. Are there any doors the bison can smash open before it returns to its native plane?
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Altai:

Spoiler:
Naah, that's pretty much it. There's some gratings, about 2 feet tall, 3 feet wide, with metal grilles where the rats seem to be coming from; that's about all. There's flowing sewage water on the other side of the grills; small 3 foot tall hallways with sewer channels and such.

M Halfling Barbarian 10

Full attack on Mr Tache, not raging yet. Scimitar = 18 + 8 = 26, crit confim = 6 + 8 = 14 (unlikely), damage = 3 + 4 = 7. Attack with kukri = 13 + 8 = 21, damage = 1 + 2 = 3.

"Everyone want to kill me all time. Nothing new."
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

The scimitar hits; not a crit;...
the kukri is parried by his rapier.
You see fear in his eyes.
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Stiggy; Elgan...
Male Wild Elf Druid 16 (Shifter version, PHBII)

Elgan slaps his hand over his eyes as the firebolt slams into the hob behind the desk, and then his fellows leap into action. He sighs.

"Awww,... fer deh luv a',..." is all he allows himself. Then he launches into a casting as he backpedals to safety.

Converting a spell to Summon Monster, moved back 5' next to the door, hoping to be protected by the rest of the group until I can get this off! Creature will appear on my turn next round. I have GOT to invest in some way to hasten this spell! ;)
I AM THE LORD OF ALL HELLFIRE!!!!!

Stiggy!!!

Elgan, you can pop out the door too; everybody else kinda did, and there's a gob of hobgoblins staring at you guys...
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