paizo.com - Titanic Games / Messageboards / Paizo Community / Off-Topic Discussions / The CORBOSSY -or- Jason and the Bulmahnauts

Bulmahnaut #1, Fri, Sep 4, 2009, 02:27 PM

The beautiful lines of a yar trireme glint in the sunlight reflecting off wine dark waters. Above the spray projects the bustline of a bewitching sorceress. On board, a loyal crew of grim minotaurs work the oars in time to the thuds of the bovine mallets, sounding on a drum covered in red dragon hide.

This is the ship CORBOSSY, over which Jason worked tirelessly for over two years, accomplishing his first great labor. It sails now where-ever his will and Forture bid, borne upon Poseidon's vast waves.

Molech (Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Modules Subscriber), Fri, Sep 4, 2009, 02:34 PM

VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIK INGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKING S!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!V IKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKI NGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!

-W. E. Ray

Bulmahnaut #1, Fri, Sep 4, 2009, 02:57 PM

Hearing the shouts of a shipful of fiend-bound vikings, the CORBOSSY quickens its pace and veers off its former course.
Cutting the low vessel of unwashed minotaur-wannabees cleanly midship, it leaves the hapless enemy to drown in the unforgiving sea,
passing on to greater challenges.

Bulmahnaut #3, Fri, Sep 4, 2009, 07:48 PM

Molech wrote:

VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIK INGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKING S!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!V IKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKI NGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!

-W. E. Ray

Vikings wear helmets with horns on them because they want to be Buhlmanauts.

Hugo Solis (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Fri, Sep 4, 2009, 08:01 PM

Mmmm... I'm more of a Mona person...but you have my support :P

Bulmahnaut #1, Fri, Sep 4, 2009, 10:42 PM

Buhlmanaut #3 wrote:

Molech wrote:

VIKINGS!
-W. E. Ray

Vikings wear helmets with horns on them because they want to be Bulmahnauts.

Welcome, brother. Ahem... (points to #3's name tage)... you might want to correct your name tag.

We'll have to work on how to best integrate Mona into this mythos. He's kind of a powerful, Lovecraftian cyclops.

Bulmahnaut #5, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 06:27 AM

Huzzah! Now there are three of us! Bulmahnauts kick ass!

Bulmahnaut #1, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 09:00 AM

I wonder what happened to 2 and 4?

Gark the Goblin, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 09:10 AM

Molech wrote:

VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIK INGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKING S!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!V IKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!VIKI NGS!VIKINGS!VIKINGS!

-W. E. Ray

Hey! That's my shtick!

Bulmahnaut #5, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 10:20 AM

Bulmahnaut #1 wrote:

I wonder what happened to 2 and 4?

I guess we're just not very good with numbers. Either that or we're just....odd.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...."odd"! Get it!

Bulmahnaut #3, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 10:20 AM

Bulmahnaut #1 wrote:

Buhlmanaut #3 wrote:

Molech wrote:

VIKINGS!
-W. E. Ray

Vikings wear helmets with horns on them because they want to be Bulmahnauts.

Welcome, brother. Ahem... (points to #3's name tage)... you might want to correct your name tag.

I don't know what you are talking about.

Bulmahnaut #3, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 10:24 AM

Bulmahnaut #5 wrote:

Bulmahnaut #1 wrote:

I wonder what happened to 2 and 4?

I guess we're just not very good with numbers. Either that or we're just....odd.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...."odd"! Get it!

2 and 4 will be along soon. They are busy getting drunk.

Bulmahnaut #5, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 10:27 AM

Mmmmm.....booze.

Bulmahnaut #1, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 10:29 AM

What is the Bulmahnaut standard for, "drunk"?
In that case Bulmahnaut's should almost never be drunk.
I mean, you don't even have to be able to stand up to row.

Is it odd that the odd Bulmahnauts are sober,
but the even Bulmahnauts are not? Odd...even...keel...row...keel over...

DAMMIT! Let's not have any more of those freakin' posts that screw up the horizontal of the page.

Bulmahnaut #3, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 10:36 AM

You know, this thread will be really boring if all we do all day is row a boat. We should at least have a sing along.

Bulmahnaut #1, Sat, Sep 5, 2009, 02:22 PM

Songs are good.

But surely Adventure is our calling, the rowing just gets us from thread to thread, ur, I mean adventure to adventure.

Bulmahnaut #5, Mon, Sep 7, 2009, 08:37 AM

Begins laying down a trail of bloody meat in an attempt to lure a vicious beast into the thread, so that the Bulmahnauts can slay it in a heroic fashion.

Bulmahnaut #1, Mon, Sep 7, 2009, 08:45 AM

If anyone one knows where a beast worthy of an epic lay lies, we could take ourselves thither and slay the brute.

Molech (Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Modules Subscriber), Mon, Sep 7, 2009, 01:04 PM

I know a great song...

ahem:

VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS! VIKINGS!

Ah, what a beautiful song

-W. E. Ray

Bulmahnaut #3, Mon, Sep 7, 2009, 01:06 PM

Stabs Molech through the eye I hate spam.

Bulmahnaut #5, Mon, Sep 7, 2009, 03:41 PM

Maybe we need a virgin or six? Then we could lure in a dragon to slay.

Bulmahnaut #1, Mon, Sep 7, 2009, 04:29 PM

With his pierced eye, Moloch doesn't see #1's great axe as it cleaves down into his skull.

Just keep a sharp eye out on the horizon...I'm sure we're getting close to adventure. Who's in the crow's nest?

Dumps the fiendish viking's body over the side.

Aside. Huh, guess this one clung to the ship and climbed aboard.

Bulmahnaut #5, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 05:11 AM

I think what we really need is for the Bulmahn to grace us with his presence. Since he's the greatest hero in the world, adventure should be drawn to him like nails to a magnet.

Bulmahnaut #1, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 05:31 AM

Yeah, like moths to the flame.

Bulmahnaut #3, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 05:59 AM

Or like men to boobs.

Bulmahnaut #1, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 06:10 AM

Like flies to cream.

Aberzombie (Pathfinder Adventure Path, Pathfinder Companion Subscriber), Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 02:26 PM

Like zombies to brainnnssss.

Hooper, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 02:27 PM

Like Carcharodon carcharias to actors in diving cages.

Mighty Mouse, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 02:27 PM

Like mice to cheese.

Frank the Mime, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 02:28 PM

....

Vinny da Vulture, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 02:28 PM

Like vultures to roadkill.

Jacques-Yves Cousteau, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 02:57 PM

Hooper wrote:

Like Carcharodon carcharias to actors in diving cages.

Merde! Hoopair!

I thought you were the one running the oxygen pump!

Thrashing is heard off the port bow of the Corbossy.

Bulmahnaut #3, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 03:00 PM

I wrote a paper for the CIA today.

Spoiler:

Tell e what you think.

Terrorists are changing their tactics once again. As military and government facilities around the world have stepped up their security measures, terrorists have switched their focus to what are referred to as “soft targets.” These targets are things like hotels, stores, and other civilian facilities.
From an operational standpoint this makes sense. While security can be tightened at major nexus points, such as an airport or a train station, It would be virtually impossible to tighten security at every hotel, supermarket, or shopping mall without significantly impacting their ability to do business. For example, while there are only three major airports in the New York City area, there are literally hundreds of hotels in the city. There are also at least twelve colleges or universities in the city, any of which could potentially be a target for terrorist activity.
These soft targets simply cannot be effectively protected from terrorist attacks because they do not have the security infrastructure to handle such security needs. In some cases the infrastructure would be completely contrary to the purpose of such an establishment. The college shootings of the past few years have illustrated that a lone individual can not only gain access to educational establishments, but can easily evade detection by law enforcement. Not only that, but the typical response in such a situation is to lock down the campus and confine students to building and dormitories. This would be devastating should a campus shooting similar to what occurred a few years ago at Virginia Tech simply be the prelude to a multistage terrorist action. The Mumbai terror attacks showed that territories groups are skilled enough to pull of such a multistage operation.
There are no easy answers to dealing with this shift in terrorist activity. Prior to this change it tactics it made it relatively easy to rank potential targets. However, now it is much more difficult because nearly every establishment in the United States is a potential target. It becomes even more imperative then ever that terrorists are intercepted and dealt with before they arrive in the target area. For example, if we knew that there was a terrorist plot to blow up the Waldorf Astoria, if the cell involved actually makes it into New York City then we have lost. We can put all the security in the world on the Waldorf, but the terrorists can simply shift their target to the Times and Seasons, or Rockefeller Plaza, or Central Park, or any of a hundred other targets that would be just as good in their minds.
Simply put, terrorists cannot be allowed to make it to American soil. It is in the best interest of the United States to allot every resource to stopping them before they get here. With the shift in terrorist tactics, it is the only way to stop attacks from happening.

Bulmahnaut #1, Tue, Sep 8, 2009, 03:26 PM

What is this "CIA"?

Is it an enemy of Jason?

Bulmahnaut #5, Wed, Sep 9, 2009, 04:28 AM

Bulmahnaut #1 wrote:

What is this "CIA"?

Is it an enemy of Jason?

Is it that giant whirlpool, or maybe the thing in the rocks with 10 heads that likes to eat sailors?

Bulmahnaut #3, Thu, Sep 10, 2009, 03:06 PM

Bust A Move!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bulmahnaut #1, Thu, Sep 10, 2009, 04:45 PM

Good question, 5.

Not sure how the squirrel in the pants dance is an answer to it...is he suggesting that, if the Bulmahnauts organized a flash mob event, doing the squirrel in your pants dance, this would somehow give Jason victory over this CIA?

Bulmahnaut #5, Fri, Sep 11, 2009, 04:30 AM

Heh heh heh....squirrels are funny.

Bulmahnaut #1, Fri, Sep 11, 2009, 07:31 AM

5, you're not keeping squirrels up there in the crow's nest, are you? They'll gnaw on the rigging.

Bulmahnaut #5, Fri, Sep 11, 2009, 01:45 PM

Why...er...no! Of course not!

Bulmahnaut #5, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 07:12 AM

Guys......?

Bulmahnaut #3, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 07:16 AM

SNORRRRREEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bulmahnaut #5, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 07:19 AM

In an effor to wake up the crew, #5 resorts to drastic measures....

KRAKEN ATTACKING OFF THE STARBOARD SIDE!!!

Bulmahnaut #3, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 07:21 AM

Would that be the right starboard side, or the left starboard side? :)

Bulmahnaut #1, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 07:38 AM

Waking up suddenly from a deep slumber, 1 charges on deck with a harpoon.

Is Zeus after us again?

Bulmahnaut #5, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 01:17 PM

Bulmahnaut #3 wrote:

Would that be the right starboard side, or the left starboard side? :)

Damn man! What kind of sailor are you? Starboard is always to the right as you face forward! Let's just hope the great Jason doesn't hear about your lapse in nautical knowledge.

Jabberjaw th SharkGodAvatar, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 01:52 PM

Meeeeeyah! Surf'n'turf?!?!?

Bulmahnaut #1, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 01:54 PM

Whoa! I think I see dinner!

Casts harpoon at divine cartoon-inspired steaks on fins.

Grab the line, boys!

Bulmahnaut #5, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 06:46 PM

"Y'all know me. Know how I earn a livin'. I'll catch this bird for you, but it ain't gonna be easy. Bad fish. Not like going down the pond chasin' bluegills and tommycods. This shark, swallow you whole. Little shakin', little tenderizin', an' down you go. And we gotta do it quick, that'll bring back your tourists, put all your businesses on a payin' basis. But it's not gonna be pleasant. I value my neck a lot more than three thousand bucks, chief. I'll find him for three, but I'll catch him, and kill him, for ten. But you've gotta make up your minds. If you want to stay alive, then ante up. If you want to play it cheap, be on welfare the whole winter. I don't want no volunteers, I don't want no mates, there's just too many captains on this island. Ten thousand dollars for me by myself. For that you get the head, the tail, the whole damn thing."

Mister Mxyzptlk, Sat, Sep 12, 2009, 08:21 PM

Jason at his Bulmahn-iest