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Fallen leaves-eating goats? I could use a few right now at work...


I am all for a national "Never Rake Again Goat Lawn Care" company, I am game if we can get some start up capital for our initial employee goats, plus, goats are hilarious!

Shadow Lodge

goats vs kidzu


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So I heard that second of the young mangy foxes were caught and is awaiting getting to vet. The last one, I heard, was found dead. So 50/50. Still better than zero.

Scarab Sages

Pathfinder Adventure Path, Maps, Modules, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Maps Subscriber
Drejk wrote:
Fallen leaves-eating goats? I could use a few right now at work...

*normal* leaves were stupid.

Pear tree leaves were delish


Maple? Horse-chestnut?

Dark Archive

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Love this thread, which I just discovered!

Animal stories are fun.


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Yeah Even when I don't have anything to post I like to check on it for the fun stories.

Dark Archive

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Vidmaster7 wrote:
Yeah Even when I don't have anything to post I like to check on it for the fun stories.

I helped raise big cats for an animal park as a teen (and grew up on a farm), so I'm full of animal stories.

But they mostly start with 'Ian did something stupid...' and end with 'and, inexplicably, still has all his limbs.'


We had issues with our neighbor's dogs the other day.

They got through the fence into the Alpaca enclosure.
One of our two had to have a testicle removed, numerous stitches to its rump and underbelly. The other Alpaca was mostly unscathed. He had to get stitches on his leg.

Two months after that they got in again and again we had to get stitches on both Alpacas. Nothing as bad as the first time.

Since then one of the Alpaca's coliced that has to be spelt wrong and passed away, so we gave the 2nd away to a farm with more so it wouldn't be lonely.

We have moved out mini horses into the enclosure where the Alpacas used to be. It hadn't been grazed in ages so lots of grass for them.

Needless to say the neighbors dogs got through again.

Now our minis are used to playing with our dogs. They chase each other around a bit but nobody ever gets hurt.

Apparently the neighbors dogs thought the horses were going to behave like the alpacas and lie down when they came through the fence.
The horses did not lie down.
They chased the dogs back and kicked. Hard.
This time both dogs needed stitches on the face and the dogs owner needed stitches too when he got between our horses and his dogs.

Yeah, we don't like that guy very much, and have reported him and his dogs to the police as damaging our livestock but nothing has come of it because our police are useless.
Maybe the dogs will learn now that attacking everything is not a good idea.


Sounds like lesson learned by both dogs and owner.
Hopefully, he'll keep better control over his animals.


One can hope. I feel slightly bad for them because they are puppies and I think he doesn't have any idea how to train them.


I'm a firm believer that not just anyone should be allowed to have dogs.
They aren't props or status symbols. They are living things that deserve to have the benefit of some training, kind of a social contract between owner and animal. I've known people who think owning a dog means leaving it outside on a chain 24/7. Makes my blood boil.


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Agreed. Our dogs sleep on the beds, and share out couches. Which causes issues with two Irish wolfhounds.

One of our dogs has developed severe arthritis and her entire shoulder is atrophied.

It harks back to one of our previous dogs who got bone cancer and her shoulder collapsed. We were told she wouldn't make 2 months. She lived happily for another two years before she got too weak.
On three legs she used to run out to great us as I got home from school. The day she didn't come out to great my mum after work we took her to the vet to be put down.

Our current arthritis dog (Funda is her name) is still running out to meet us and is happy.

We had a jack russel (Luka, funny story is that would have been my name if my parent's didn't get the dog first).
My parents got her shortly before I was born. They were told she wouldn't live to 2 years.
We had to put her down at 17.
Blind as a bat, incontinent, and the happiest dog you ever did see.

We had an indian miner fall down our chimney. We got it out but it got stuck in the room. The other dogs were chasing it to no avail.
Her, unable to see a thing, stands in the middle of the room and catches it first time it flies anywhere near her.
Before people complain about letting our dogs catch it, they terrorize the local birdlife here and chase it away/kill lots of it,
so we are not fond of them.


Yeah we had a blue healer/aussie shepherd mix. A friedn of ours couldn't handle her. She had a bad past (they acquired her becasue her former owner was pulled over on a warrant, and she was taken to the shelter) but was a great dog. She had anxiety issues, because as a working breed she had nothing to do. After her being left home alone and getting into the trash for the 30th time, they asked my wife and I to take her. We had her for about 4 years before we had to put her down. She had a bad case of panniticulitis (I'm not sure I'm spelling that right, but its a sub dermal infection issue that causes lesions). Took a while for the vet to figure out what the problem was, and prescribed prednisone for the swelling. She was back to normal after the lesions cleared up, but then took another downward turn she didn't survive after trying to ween her back off of the prednisone.
Anyhoo, we treated her like a family member while we had her, and that calmed her anxiety down quite a bit. She was a sweet, happy dog up to the end. I think it's funny how they know them being ill distresses us silly humans, and so put on a good face and be happy to spare us.

Though she was with us for such a short time, we miss her terribly.


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J4RH34D wrote:

We had an indian miner fall down our chimney. We got it out but it got stuck in the room. The other dogs were chasing it to no avail.

Her, unable to see a thing, stands in the middle of the room and catches it first time it flies anywhere near her.
Before people complain about letting our dogs catch it, they terrorize the local birdlife here and chase it away/kill lots of it,
so we are not fond of them.

I was confused by "indian miner" for a bit. That made the story even more interesting.


I had to look it up...

Myna.


Sorry yes.
Indian/Common Myna

I probably sounded like a bit of a psychopath for a bit there.


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Maybe you had some kind of rare ore in your chimney? I didn't know!
I don't judge.
:)

Scarab Sages

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So I had another rat operated upon.
She's not a cuddely rat, and getting medicine sucks. She doesn't like being picked up (everything has to go her way. Picking up --> bad. Walking onto my shoulder herself --> good)

To make the medicine go down she gets a treat after the antibiotics. After I put her back in the cage, she impatiently waits for me to give it to her.
Its a trade off


I've got a similar situation going on right now. Hammond, brother of Helgi, is on antibiotics for some respiratory issues. He seems to have a similar dislike for being grabbed, although he seems content once he is tucked in a sleeve or otherwise slightly compressed. He is a bit odd, being kind of jumpy and never outgrew the head bobbing that some young rats do.

One thing that really helped was giving the medicine to him while he is in his little box inside the cage. He won't accept anything outside the cage, but acts different in the cage.

His antibiotics are in a liquid form that is bubblegum flavor or something strange. Each dose is about 0.3ml.- a few drops. Past rats required meat flavoring, but Hammond seems fine taking the medicine as long as he is in his cage. Perhaps this will help your little lady?

Best of luck, and thanks for taking such good care of your rats!


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I learned today that the vet supposedly released the first fox somewhere in the less populous district of the city (coincidentally an area where I saw a fox hunting in the grassy strip in the middle of a large highway-like street a year or two ago). The fox was supposed to be driven to another place where it could regrow its fur in safety and learn to live in less settled place. Failure of communication? Lack of time?

Scarab Sages

Pathfinder Adventure Path, Maps, Modules, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Maps Subscriber
Fergie wrote:

I've got a similar situation going on right now. Hammond, brother of Helgi, is on antibiotics for some respiratory issues. He seems to have a similar dislike for being grabbed, although he seems content once he is tucked in a sleeve or otherwise slightly compressed. He is a bit odd, being kind of jumpy and never outgrew the head bobbing that some young rats do.

One thing that really helped was giving the medicine to him while he is in his little box inside the cage. He won't accept anything outside the cage, but acts different in the cage.

His antibiotics are in a liquid form that is bubblegum flavor or something strange. Each dose is about 0.3ml.- a few drops. Past rats required meat flavoring, but Hammond seems fine taking the medicine as long as he is in his cage. Perhaps this will help your little lady?

Best of luck, and thanks for taking such good care of your rats!

I have to pick her up to check how the wound is healing and to see if she didnt bite on the stitches.

I've found that at one point or another I'll have to force feed them the anti-biotics. It differs from rat to rat, but there is always a point where they start to recognise the taste and become suspicious and no longer want to take them, even when mixed in with something they like.

Shadow Lodge

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We had a newfie/ black lab mix.

So she wanted something from me, which i could tell because she opened my door by hitting it with her head, walking 3 feet into my room and turning around. Some dogs come when called, she knew how to say "here boy".

So when i told her wait a minute, she gave me a "WOOF" and walked off.

I can hear my sister struggling to put in the air conditioning, because we had one of those summers that went from winter to scorching hot overnight. Now, if the relationship with me wasn't your typical dog/owner, she considered my sister her puppy. But she absolutely, did not like the heat.

"Hey sis, the dog wants me to put in the AC, now. Can I get it?"

"No no no I got it"

I go to turn around

"woof."

"Sorry, she's in the way. She won't let me put it in"

So she puts her head into my sisters stomach and walks her 15 feet down the hallway, turns around and gives me a

woof

And 15 minutes later was sitting in front of the wonderful machine that got rid of the heat.

Same dog. Gives me the "here boy" open the door and turn around to leave. She walks to my mom.

"Mom, you okay?"

"I'm fine"

"Okay girl, you want to go out?" Walk over, open the door to let her into the back yard.

"WOOOF"

So I come back over and mom kinda moans from the pain. Can fool me but not the dog...

"Sorry, the dog insists I at least get you an asprin and something to drink "


Good dog!

Scarab Sages

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Interesting rat fact: Male rats masturbate.
If they curl up they can easily reach their junk.

This is usually a private affair. Being a prey animal, it leaves them in a vulnerable position so they hide when they masturbate.

Except this one rat we had. He'd do it in the middle of the cage. He'd stop for a second if you walk in, then continue.

Awkward for us. He did not care.

Shadow Lodge

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When I got back from africa i had some pain in my stomach. Got a scan. Waited a few days for the doctor to look at it. I'm about to head out to my first D&D game since i got back and the doctor calls.

"Hey, what hospital are you in?"

"Erm. what?"

"Hospital." names a few. english isn't his first language and wasn't sure he'd been understood. "which one are you at?"

"I'm not in a hospital. I was about to go out actually..

" ...you're not in a hospital?

"No.

" You can walk?

"I told you it hurt. But yeah.

"you. need. to. go. to the hospital. now.

"but.. game..

"HOSPITAL!!!!"


What was that?

Shadow Lodge

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They still don't know. Should have gone to the vet


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I can understand why human docs would be confused when trying to treat a very large wolf...

Not to be speciesist or anything :)

Shadow Lodge

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Apologies if this is a repeat, but i looked for it 3 times and couldn't find it

We had a donkey in the back of the language class in maurtiania. It was a young one, i used to feed it orange slices and scratch its ears.

When i went away to the capital to get an ultrasound , it brayed all night, and almost knocked over the wall to say hello to me when i came back.

When the donkey was old enough to start pulling a cart, the kids dragged it by its ears over to the cart. (they're kinda mean to the critters over there, if its not working hit it)

I said "whoaaa..[french] you don't need to do that. Watch.

[english ]"Eeyore, go over to the cart."

Donkey walks over to the cart, walks past it, and backs up into the bars on the cart.

Sundown came, donkey came home, they go to drag it back into the pen by the ears. "Whoaaa.. no need watch. Eeyore, go back in the pen... donkey trotted back over to the pen.

their father watched the exchange and said "you have to teach me english"

i said "huh.. why? "

"So i can talk to the donkey.


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I love that story.


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English, the tongue of asses?


I was trying to find fault with that logic Drejk...however...I could not.

The language of asses indeed...


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I’m not a Druid per-se, but I’ve got a few ranks in animal empathy.

Had a lab growing up named Louie. I swear that dog could understand English. You could just talk to him and he’d do stuff. “Go get mom.”* goes to get my mom “What do you want?” *walks to Door/food/ball/etc. “Go to the car.” *goes to the car
louie and I both lived in Germany for 6 years and though my German is terrible he seemed to be following instructions on German as well as English.

I was in Cairnes (sp?) Australia recently. Walking down the street totally nonchalantly. There were swarms of bird sized black flying things everywhere. Initially I just thought they were birds and thought nothing of it. Thy sounded funny, but not so much that I was immediately suspicious. Maybe Australian birds sound different. Who knows. Then I got close to a tree and took a good look. All those many many many black dots in the trees and skies were not birds. They were bats. Not regular bats either. A giant (the biggest I think) species known as flying foxes. I’m a tall guy and their wingspan was probably half my height. My friends and I just stood in awe for probably ten minutes.

Dogs are my favorite. They seem to sense that I’m pro-dog. I tend to know my neighbors dogs names long before I learn their humans names. Sadly, I cannot have one at this point in my life. I travel for work and my husband isn’t interested in having his own dog. I don’t get one because it wouldn’t be fair to the dog. I will, however, play with all of my friends/neighbors/random strangers dogs at every opportunity.


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Drejk wrote:
English, the tongue of asses?

#truestory


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That sounds like one of my cats. Got fed up with Mieko always stealing Vai's food. We also had a visitor over who was going to cat-sit for a few days for us, and I happened to see Mieks eating out of Vai's bowl again. "Mieko! Eat out of your own bowl, will ya please?" Mieko stops eating. Cranes head back to look at me. Takes a couple sidesteps over to her own bowl. Eats. Visitor freaks out.

Shadow Lodge

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Our white lab went after a possum on the front lawn.

Being a possum it immediately well.. played possum. Being a mush my dog stopped barking at it and pawed it a little.

Pull the dog away. My aunt from the city is freaking out.

"oh my god its dead"

"Oh don't worry I'll fix it"

Denstablua punctilabulum kalima kaliMAAAAAA

Okay lets go inside.

We watch it from the window. 5 minutes later it pops up and walks off.

Think i got hearing loss from her scream....


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Campaign Setting, Companion, Maps, Roleplaying Game Subscriber

Isn't that against some "cruelty to stupid animals" law? I mean, making someone believe you have the power to raise the dead.


Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:

I’m not a Druid per-se, but I’ve got a few ranks in animal empathy.

Had a lab growing up named Louie. I swear that dog could understand English. You could just talk to him and he’d do stuff. “Go get mom.”* goes to get my mom “What do you want?” *walks to Door/food/ball/etc. “Go to the car.” *goes to the car
louie and I both lived in Germany for 6 years and though my German is terrible he seemed to be following instructions on German as well as English.

Dogs are capable of understanding individual words and some basic sentences, and they read a lot from the tone of the voice.

Shadow Lodge

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Said white mush of a dog walks into the bushes. comes out with a baby skunk in her mouth. Puts it at my feet. Walks into the bushes. Comes back with a baby skunk. Puts it at my feet. First baby skunk heads back into the bushes, dog picks that up, drops it at my feet and barks at me (probably telling me i'm a terrible babysitter)

Nope. We are so leaving before mom comes back. Nope....

I don't have pets that "followed me home can i keep it". I have pets that use that line on things THEY adopt.

Shadow Lodge

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I'm moving out of my apartment from when I went back to school. The neighbors are having a... heated discussion to the point that I feel obligated to go see if they're okay.

I'd been moving stuff up and down the steps for a few days, so my back is killing me. I shuffle down the block to the fight and don't even say anything, just lean up against a telephone pole and shut my eyes. For some reason, doing things like that scares people more than actually trying to threaten them. My eye contacts always been a little "off" but once my back got hurt, forget the thousand yard stare I'm doing astronomy.

"You, mind your business or I'm gonna sick my dog on you"

I lean down to the dog in question, a pitbull. Pet him on either side of the head and ruffle his ears back and forth. "awwww... puppy"

The wife starts laughing "Thank you, I'll be alright..."

Scarab Sages

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Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:


I was in Cairnes (sp?) Australia recently. Walking down the street totally nonchalantly. There were swarms of bird sized black flying things everywhere. Initially I just thought they were birds and thought nothing of it. Thy sounded funny, but not so much that I was immediately suspicious. Maybe Australian birds sound different. Who knows. Then I got close to a tree and took a good look. All those many many many black dots in the trees and skies were not birds. They were bats. Not regular bats either. A giant (the biggest I think) species known as flying foxes. I’m a tall guy and their wingspan was probably half my height. My friends and I just stood in awe for probably ten minutes.

For some reason people know in Australia the animals, insects, plants and even the water can kill you but don't expect our giant animals.

Not my stories but I find them funny.

My parents were staying at a bed and breakfast with a cockatoo named Tony and there was an American tourist staying there also named Tony. He didn't know cockatoos can speak human when they want too. So he went over to it and in that tone of voice people use on kids and animals says "Hello Polly who's a pretty bird, does Polly want a cracker." It looks over at him and replies "Hello Tony." much to his startlement. Apparently later he protested he didn't want eggs with breakfast because Australian supermarkets don't refrigerate them then was horrified to discover where eggs come from when the owner showed him hers were fresh laid.

Also a fox who sadly turned to a life of crime and tried stealing a gophers wallet Fox robs golfer.


BigNorseWolf wrote:


I don't have pets that "followed me home can i keep it". I have pets that use that line on things THEY adopt.

Family acquired a cat that way when I was a kid. Sister's dog took off down the street. After 20 minutes of looking for him, we find him slowly walking home, but he keeps looking down in front of him. Get closer and see he is herding this tiny kitten with his nose back to the house.

He never even ended up liking the kitten after he got her, but my other sister's Chihuahua started mating with her when she went into heat.

Shadow Lodge

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Same neighborhood as the other incident, this was my first weekend there rather than my last.

The neighbors (different ones) are yelling. Walk over. There's a guy wrestling a guy and a girl wrestling a girl screaming at each other on the ground. I don't know who's who and i really can't bend over so, i'm standing around looking stupid and ignoring the person on the porch telling me to make them stop until they break up.

Once they break up and one group starts walking off i can stand in between them. The actual home owner starts yelling at me to make them leave so i start sahuffling forward slowly and they start to move off. Then some more words are said and they come back.

The guy I'm apparently playing meat shield for takes out a tazer and starts waving it drunkenly around (what, this sort of things happens without alchohol?) gets kind of close. A little more yelling, a little more screaming and the other couple move off.

I head back upstairs, sit down at my computer. Sniff. Sniff. Why do i smell bacon?

Go to the bathroom, look in the mirror, burn mark on the back of the shirt. Dammit....


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BigNorseWolf wrote:

Same neighborhood as the other incident, this was my first weekend there rather than my last.

The neighbors (different ones) are yelling. Walk over. There's a guy wrestling a guy and a girl wrestling a girl screaming at each other on the ground. I don't know who's who and i really can't bend over so, i'm standing around looking stupid and ignoring the person on the porch telling me to make them stop until they break up.

Once they break up and one group starts walking off i can stand in between them. The actual home owner starts yelling at me to make them leave so i start sahuffling forward slowly and they start to move off. Then some more words are said and they come back.

The guy I'm apparently playing meat shield for takes out a tazer and starts waving it drunkenly around (what, this sort of things happens without alchohol?) gets kind of close. A little more yelling, a little more screaming and the other couple move off.

I head back upstairs, sit down at my computer. Sniff. Sniff. Why do i smell bacon?

Go to the bathroom, look in the mirror, burn mark on the back of the shirt. Dammit....

Have we moved from animal stories or just generally messed up stories?

I’m no particular order I’ve been a/an:
Military brat (was in Germany when the wall came down)
EMT in a pissant country college town
Army medic
Intelligence analyst
Sex addiction counselfor associate (a mostly clerical role)
Young gay city mouse boy forced to live in the countryside

I’ve got stories. Just didn’t want to get off topic.
R

The Exchange

Sex addiction counselor? Wtf?

How does that even come in?


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Just a Mort wrote:

Sex addiction counselor? Wtf?

How does that even come in?

It’s just like alcoholism or drug addiction but with a different outlet. If you’re really curious read the book “Out of the Shadows” by Dr Patrick Carnes. He’s the leading expert in the field. Also who I worked for, indirectly.


If you would like to learn more about sex addiction and do not have the patience for proper educational literature I would suggest the movie choke.
(mostly for entertainment purposes.)

Shadow Lodge

Coffee Golem wrote:
Have we moved from animal stories or just generally messed up stories?

Im trying to keep it to the messed up in a funny way ones.

Mind you, my life seems to have been directed by the guy who does americas funniest home video groin shot reels...

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