101 reasons you missed


Gamer Life General Discussion

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Liberty's Edge

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1. You nearly tripped.


2. The target was important to the plot.

3. Because your GM says so.


4. The target was a displacer beast


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5. The sun was in your eye ... okay I couldn't resist.
6. A bug flew in your face. Or worse you swallowed it.
7. Mirage (not the spell).
8. The target slipped and fell.
9. You forgot to store your weapon (or stored the wrong one) in your Glove of Storing.
10. Briefly blinded by that last stroke of Lightning.
11. Too busy gawking at the lady(?) on the second floor balcony.
12. Boy was the turkey leg tasty ... and greasy.
13. Called the wrong weapon.
14. That Refuge spell surely got triggered at an inconvenient moment.
15. Wow a martial artiste actually took that feat!
16. Yep that crossbeam was weaker than you thought.
17. Bad moment for an earthquake (of purely natural occurrence).
18. The wagon wheel broke (or hit a rock) just as you swung.
19. Great! Why did I choose the tree with the hornets nest to hide behind?
20. Oh that's right the guard peace-bonded our weapons.
21. I hate mirrors!
22. The alchemist failed to mention just how bad the heartburn would be.
23. The target's buddy has a Shield of Missile Attraction, who'd of guessed.
24. Dang! lost count of my Rage rounds again.
25. Why did I trust the wizard when he said "Trust me".


26. They parried the blow.

27. A loud cat howls from somewhere in the distance. Momentarily, you hate it more than your target. The feeling passes swiftly.

28. You pull at an old scar. The momentary surge of pain distracts you.

29. You pull at a fresh wound, and it reopens. The momentary surge of pain distracts you.

30. An ally gets in the way. Momentarily, you hate them less than your target and divert your strike to the side.


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Kobold Cleaver wrote:
30. An ally gets in the way. Momentarily, you hate them less than your target and divert your strike to the side.

30A. An ally gets in the way. Momentarily, you hate them more than your target and divert your strike to hit them instead


31. The dice gods hath opposed thee!


32. Because here failing to beat armor class is considered a miss... even if you hit that guy's plate mail full on right in the center - merely failing to penetrate it or do any harm.

33. Because they stole your heart, and ever since then you've missed... them a lot.

Silver Crusade

Because, Maverick, you didn't wait for your targeting computer to lock on!

Scarab Sages

3 people marked this as a favorite.

35. Because your weapon has spontaneously begun to awaken into an intelligent magical weapon, and is, you know, just trying to sort itself out.

36. Because you were just struck by a lightning bolt, and now your weapon's become magnetized.

37. Because although coating your dagger in honey may help you to eat peas with it, it also winds up screwing it up a little in combat.

38. Because the priest at the last temple you visited gave you a dirty look when you left without donating.

39. Because your target's wearing f!$%ing full plate armor, and you're seriously trying to attack him with a cutlass???

40. BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!


41. Because you're a fighter, and martials can't have nice things


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Maps, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Maps, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber

42. Distracted by the answer to life, the universe, and everything.

43. Because you are a first level PC that has a half BAB and delusions of grandeur against a 40+ AC opponent.


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44. I didn't miss, I meant to do that. Yeah.

Liberty's Edge

Pathfinder Lost Omens, Rulebook Subscriber

45. Popped another image!!


46. Why did I have to buy those arrows with arrow magnets in them...
47. Those puppy eyes just looked so sad!
48. I couldn't harm a girl (sorry had to XD)
49. Plot twist: it was all a dream so that arrow just went right through him.

Dark Archive

2 people marked this as a favorite.

50. I zigged when I should have zagged!

Scarab Sages

51. You are stunned by the giant goddamn plot twist your enemy just dropped on you.

52. Your enemy just threw a deck of cards in your face.


I'm Hiding In Your Closet wrote:
52. Your enemy just threw a deck of cards in your face.

that then promptly explode

Dark Archive

1 person marked this as a favorite.

53. "Wow, I didn't know that thing's arms would be that rubbery. Or damage resistant. What the hell is it anyway?"
54. Just as you start to swing you notice a rabbit fur handbag. You recognize this handback, you made it during the ice age. Then it got lost somehow. The marvel of finding your long lost handbag at this time and place disrupts your concentration. Suddenly you forget you're swinging your two handed axe at the orc. You also forget you're falling after having jumped from a second story balcony to attack said orc. Because of this, you miss not only the orc... but the ground.

Scarab Sages

3 people marked this as a favorite.

55. Just before your swing lands, the entire campaign world is abruptly demolished to make way for a hyperspace bypass. GAME OVER.

56. You're still getting used to having two heads.

57. The DM's using bistro-math.

58. Just because having this fish in your ear is mind-bogglingly useful doesn't mean it doesn't get a bit uncomfortable from time to time.

59. Oh gods, you really shouldn't have eaten that blue hotdog...!

60. You forgot to bring a towel.

Sovereign Court

2 people marked this as a favorite.

56. 12 years before, your master began to teach you how to fight. He taught you well, but he intentionally left a small flaw in your fighting style so that when he finally betrayed you, he and only he would know precisely how to dodge your blow.

57. You suck... and not just with a straw.


Charon's Little Helper wrote:
56. 12 years before, your master began to teach you how to fight. He taught you well, but he intentionally left a small flaw in your fighting style so that when he finally betrayed you, he and only he would know precisely how to dodge your blow.

that reminds me of Jade Empire


I'm Hiding In Your Closet wrote:

55. Just before your swing lands, the entire campaign world is abruptly demolished to make way for a hyperspace bypass. GAME OVER.

56. The DM's using bistro-math.

57. Oh gods, you shouldn't have eaten that blue hotdog...!

58. You forgot to bring a towel.

To carry on the references...

59. Your opponent stuck there thumb out and well there a hitchhiker you know the rest.

60. Your copy of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy reminded you this character is important to the plot

61. "MAKE IT STOP!" as your opponent begins reciting Vogon poetry

62. Your opponent told you the answer to life the universe and everything

Scarab Sages

66. You are startled by the sudden thunderous laughter of a short purple vampire.

Dark Archive

67. The god of mathematics suddenly goes on vacation


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68. It was just an optical illuuuuusion.

Dark Archive

69. Captain Janeway said "Computer, end program"

Scarab Sages

2 people marked this as a favorite.

70. There is a rift in the space-time continuum!

71. Your enemy just keeps talking in one long incredibly unbroken sentence moving from topic to topic so that no one has a chance to interrupt it's really quite hypnotic.

72. Just for a moment, you thought you really could see...five lights.

Dark Archive

73. The battery in your sword's holographic blade died mid swing

And yes, that's a reference to novels Dream Park and it's sequel.


Ctrl+F: Missing the obvious

74. It was an afterimage


75. You slip on the blood of the enemies you hadn't missed the turns before.


76. You thought the wizard was about to betray you.

77. Your GM does the math and points out that you're not in melee range of your opponent for another 2 turns at both your current fall speeds.

78. There was no target.

79. Non euclidean geometry.


80. Storm-tossed trees block your way.

Dark Archive

81. You're a stormtrooper shooting at Han Solo


82. You took an arrow to the knee.

Sovereign Court

83. There is a literal monkey on your back who keeps putting his hands over your eyes.

84. You meant to miss - it was just a warning.

Dark Archive

85. you're a lover, not a fighter


86. Your favored enemy bonus does not apply as it was a polymorphed dragon not a human after all
87. You attempted a flurry of blows
88. You're a rogue
89. You rolled the wrong dice
90. The GM's beer glass is still empty


91. Turns out The Force isn't so great at exhaust ports after all. Thanks, Obi-wan.

Dark Archive

92. You discover that in the battle of you vs volcano... Volcano wins without any real effort.

93. Your ultra mega super death attack meteor strike was a serious miscalculation. Did you really need one big enough to hit the entire country you're in?


94. The gazebo provided cover


95. a witch hexed you... well... she had a wart, and she did look at you once...


97. I was dead at the time!

Dark Archive

96. Your name is Nine, and were teamed up with Seven. It's kind of hard to hit when Seven Eight Nine.


98. 1d4+1 rounds of nausea triggered by tripwire.
99. Roll the d20 twice and take the lower roll. Turns out, natural 20 doesn't crit.

Scarab Sages

100. Your foe has faith in the Great One, so your knife does not cut him, and he has courage - *true* courage - so your rock will not break him, and he is pure of heart, so your arrow cannot catch him.

Scarab Sages

101. Don't feel bad; it happens to every adventurer sooner or later.


102. There aren't 101 reasons, you missed this one


103. I had 99 reasons but a witch ain't one.

Liberty's Edge

104. Your sword broke.

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