TemplateFu, I summon thee!


RPG Superstar™ General Discussion

Grand Lodge Marathon Voter Season 9

I'm getting excited about the upcoming Season 9, and have already begun designing items. Last year I submitted before understanding templating, and I want to make sure I don't err in the same manner twice running.

To that end I've designed a ridiculous item that I will certainly NOT be submitting as an example to make sure I get the basic principles. I will have some other assorted questions afterwards.

Amulet of Barq's Skin Aura minor universal; CL 1st Slot neck; Price 1000 gp; Weight -
Description This ring is of simple design, and where many rings would contain an inset gem it has instead a Barq's Root Beer bottlecap. While this ring is worn, its wearer's skin tastes delightfully like Barq's Root Beer. Any enemy that succeeds a bite attack against the wearer gains a +1 morale bonus on attack and damage rolls with further bite attacks until the end of its next round, and must succeed a Will save (DC 14) to take any standard or full-round action that does not include such a bite attack for the same duration.
Construction Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, prestidigitation; Cost 500 gp

My biggest questions (beyond just 'did I screw something up') are whether or not I should provide PRD hyperlinks within (such as for prestidigitation within the construction requirements) and whether or not there should be more line breaks separating any components of the item. Also, should 1000 have a comma (1,000)?

Thanks in advance!


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All of these questions and more are answered in my pdf compilation that can be down loaded from my games design blog.

Hope it helps

RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 aka motteditor

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Hyperlinks are a personal choice. I've seen some people say they don't like seeing them, that it feels like showing off or gilding the lily. They don't have hyperlinks in books, so why provide them here, though I think you could argue many online references WOULD have hyperlinks. Personally, I think it's convenient -- especially if it's a spell I might not know (but since the rules say only rules on the PRD can be referenced, I'd make sure I linked to that) or definitely rules that aren't as well known -- but I don't really add or subtract any "points" for items with hyperlinks. My guess is it's pretty low down on the list of criteria people have for voting.

Typically you should have more line breaks but that looks correct with the template currently up in the Superstar Open Call rules. I think that template's incorrect (it's been questioned in this thread) but I'm going to keep a close eye on that. I'd follow whatever the template is there and at the moment you appear to have it correct. Traditionally, you'd want a line break after the item's name, after the caster level and after construction.

Finally, yes, 1,000 should have a comma.

Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9

Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Maps, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

I do hope that template is incorrect as it would be a complete and utter nightmare to read things when voting.

Sczarni RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32 , Champion Voter Season 6, Champion Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Champion Voter Season 9

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Which of the following is correct for an item with a negligible weight?

a) -

b) –

c) —

d) 0 lbs.

Answer:
c) — [the em-dash]

Grand Lodge Marathon Voter Season 9

Template Fu wrote:

All of these questions and more are answered in my pdf compilation that can be down loaded from my games design blog.

Hope it helps

Thanks, it does.

Now I just need to look up how to make an em-dash.

Sovereign Court Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9

Said with Texas drawl: "Well Mr. M Dash, it didn't take you long to show yourself around these parts."

Sczarni RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32 , Champion Voter Season 6, Champion Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Champion Voter Season 9

Le Petite Mort wrote:
Now I just need to look up how to make an em-dash.

In Windows OS, use alt+0151 to make an em-dash. —

Marathon Voter Season 9

I memorized that combination a while ago, along with some other important characters—using double hyphens has always bugged me. ಠ—ಠ

RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Hodge Podge

Alt-0151, right? I use it in business emails all the time. :D

Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9

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You can also locate what you know to be an em-dash, in an item on the PRD for example, then select, copy and paste it.

— <--- that one is from Thomas's multiple choice "c" above.


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If you weren't aware, your soul is a necessary component required to summon Template Fu.

Sorry.

Please be more careful when summoning in the future.


JJ Jordan wrote:

If you weren't aware, your soul is a necessary component required to summon Template Fu.

Sorry.

Please be more careful when summoning in the future.

Lol!

If it's a soul to summon me, god only knows the cost for summoning Neil Spicer! :P

Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9

This may be of some use. I don't know exactly how much it applies with the judges now not judging round one, but *shrug* it helped me.

Good luck everyone.

RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 aka motteditor

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Covent, those are great tips that many of us rely on to help inform our votes.

Also, the formatting issues in the template coding have been fixed. The line breaks should be in there as usual.

Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8

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DID SOMEONE SAY DASHES?

Liberty's Edge

Hey guys! First year submitting and I have an actual item to submit but I originally wanted to submit the one below. However, I was told it's too "spell in a can" and that the Tar and Feather Feather Token already fulfilled its role. Please note the unique recharge, single target, halved range increment, and touch attack (with concealment) changes. Looking for feedback!

Glitter Pouch
Aura Weak illusion; CL 3rd
Slot Slotless; Price 7786 gp; Weight 1 lbs.
Description
This belt pouch contains three doses of a golden powder which can be thrown at a single target (concealment still applies) at a +5 bonus as a ranged touch attack with an increment of sixty-five feet. If the user selects an unoccupied square, the dust settles to the ground and acts as a fine powder. On a successful hit, the creature is affected by the spell glitterdust. The pouch contains enough powder for three attacks and regains a charge every twenty-four hours. However, if left open and undisturbed in a particularly dusty area (such as an ancient ruin, a desert, or a sawmill, etc.) the pouch regains its charges at a rate of one per hour.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, glitterdust, mage hand, dust from a structure or area at least several hundred years old; Cost 3896 gp

Liberty's Edge

Also, if this needs to go elsewhere please let me know ;)

RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 aka motteditor

Felix, it should probably go in the Blazing 9 thread, which is a practice thread. That said, here are some thoughts...

There are a number of formatting errors:
The aura strength though be lowercase; also "weak" isn't a proper category, it should be faint. The price and cost need commas in them (they're also very arbitrary numbers; I'm guessing they're figured out very exactly using the pricing formule, but I'd probably just round up to 7,800 or down to 7,500). When the weight is just 1 lb., you don't need lbs. to be plural. Your spells should be in italics and Pathfinder doesn't typically use component like the dust you have listed so I would just delete that.

In the body of the item, 65 shouldn't be spelled out; it's also a really odd increment, IMO. I like your description, and that you avoided using "is" or other forms of the verb "to be."

It is indeed top much of a spell in a can for Superstar -- it's basically just glitterdust.

I would also look at other dusts/powders in the Core Rulebook, since your phrasing seems a bit odd in places, such as "if the user selects an unoccupied square."

I think the biggest advice I can give you is to look for items that may be similar to the one you plan to submit (which as you know you can't post here) and make sure your wording matches the way Paizo writes. That's a critical part of this contest and getting used to doing it is a key part of becoming a successful freelancer.

Liberty's Edge

Thanks Jacob! All taken to heart. Could I message you my actual submission work for you to take a look at?

Liberty's Edge

Also 65 is half of the range increment of glitterdust, to reduce its effectiveness as compared to the spell ;)

RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 aka motteditor

Felix01 wrote:
Thanks Jacob! All taken to heart. Could I message you my actual submission work for you to take a look at?

Sure.

As for the range increment, that's the kind of thing someone may not be aware of in terms of your thought process, so it just sticks out as an odd number. That can often happen in design where something that seems completely logical to you doesn't get recognized and you want to be careful to avoid it. Don't give people reasons to vote against your item! :)

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