Originally I class I designed back in 2011, after many years of writing and re-writing, I made it to be more playable (I think)
The Umbra, is not unlike 3.5's Soulknife, though the Umbra specializes more on stealth and shadows.
I've yet to playtest it though. :(
I think it's cool and completely unique!
What I kind of don't like is the flavor text. I get the role and status you are giving the Umbras, but could you maybe explain a little bit about how they got these powers, what the nature of their power is and why someone would choose to be an umbra?
That's a great suggestion. Truth be told, the flavor text has not changed since 2011.
Happy to help!
This feels like a first draft. I might go into more detail later, but my biggest issue is flavor and ambiguously described mechanics. What's the flavor of the class? What is the class in the game world? You just say they're shadow-wielding assassins, but other classes can do that. The class doesn't really cling to a mechanic that defines them -- they're just kind of a shadow-themed mediocre fighter. Finally, the class doesn't use Pathfinder RPG formatting and writing style. Normally I don't comment on this for homebrew stuff, but that's really important for someone advertising themselves as a freelance TTRPG designer. Yes, I know you made this in 2011. That just means you had more than three years to develop and revise this before posting it here.
That being said, I think you got killer ideas here. Shadowcrafting is rather cool, and attacking people's shadows to harm them adds plenty of depth and flavor. If I were to rewrite this class, I would have the entire class centered around "shadow-mancy." Perhaps extend the class to have lightcrafting as well.
That being said, I think you got killer ideas here. Shadowcrafting is rather cool, and attacking people's shadows to harm them adds plenty of depth and flavor. If I were to rewrite this class, I would have the entire class centered around "shadow-mancy." Perhaps extend the class to have lightcrafting as well.
I'll make sure to take everything you said into consideration, and fix accordingly, thanks a lot! :D
Gave the class a HUGE overhaul.
Anyone care to give me honest constructive criticism?
@Cyrad: Yep, I'm a fan of attacking shadows.
@Rallaster - haven't had a chance to look at your shadowclass. If you follow my link you'll see it's from a previous poster's shadowclass thread - there might be some stuff you can borrow/draw further inspiration from. Honest. ;p
@Rallaster - haven't had a chance to look at your shadowclass. If you follow my link you'll see it's from a previous poster's shadowclass thread - there might be some stuff you can borrow/draw further inspiration from. Honest. ;p
Thanks! I'll be sure to give it a looksee!
Bumping because I edited the class further today.
I defined better how the shadowstrike works, edited the shadowcraftpool, the cost of the shadowmancies and even added a new feat.
It says the page can't be found. :(
I prefer Dropbox, but it does require that the person viewing the document to click on two links, whereas Google docs requires only one.
It says the page can't be found. :(
shadowmancer
SHADOWCRAFT POOL
I recommend renaming this to just "shadowcraft". That has a better ring to it. You could go with regaining points at midnight, but there aren't any shadows at midnight. You could go with dawn or dusk. For that matter, you can find great shadows when the sun is up too.
DARKNESS
So at level 1 you have provided a single way to spend points? I think you can do a little better than that. I understand that the spell creates the shadows that allow him to get his extra damage off, but the spell's area doesn't move. I recommend allowing spending points to activate an aura that reduced bright light to dim light, and dim light to darkness. Alternately, or additionally, I would provide a simple way to dispel magical light and/or extinguish light sources.
DARKVISION
i see there is no concession made for characters that already have darkvision. Not a big deal, but you might give them little bump. For example" An umbra gains Darkvision 30 feet. If he already Darkvision, it increases by 10 feet. At 3rd level and every two levels thereafter, an umbra's Darkvision increases by 10 feet."
LOW-LIGHT VISION
What happens when a creature already has low-light vision?
SHADOWSTRIKE
So is this ability shut down by the presence of a torch, but he can counter it with darkness. He's in trouble if the creature has an ever burning torch or is with a daylight spell.
SHADOWBOLT
You light a formula for calculating this ability's spell level. How do these interact with spells with the light descriptor? Do they negate the bolt or no?
SHADOWMANCY
I don't really like this word. I was thinking shadow invocations, umbramancy (emphasise bra), or shadow talents. Here is a link to a page that lists way to many translations for the word shadow. Most of these abilities consume too many points, consider the umbra has no other spellcasting and gains only 1/2 level + Wis mod.
Thanks a lot for the feedback! Will modify accordingly.